Ohhh that would be interesting! I think that would be a great idea!
sukikyoufu Member
This stage is a prison, a beautiful nightmare.
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Suki
April 22nd
England/GMT time
If you have an questions or ideas please feel free to get in touch! I also work full time so sometimes my responses can be sporadic.
If I'm not on here writing I will most certainly be playing video games or sucked into a new world reading.
April 22nd
England/GMT time
If you have an questions or ideas please feel free to get in touch! I also work full time so sometimes my responses can be sporadic.
If I'm not on here writing I will most certainly be playing video games or sucked into a new world reading.
Most Recent Posts
Sounds good to me!
Elise felt the fear run through her as she looked at the unblinking intense gaze he held with her all whilst his hand was wrapped around her neck. This could very well be where she died all because she was being far to stubborn to back down, proclaiming that she would never marry him like she had a choice in the matter. The minute she heard the soft voice leave his lips she felt her heart stop, eyes widened as fear crossed them when she felt him strangling her.
It was at that moment she was sure she was about to be killed, strangled to death as she struggled to breathe. Loss of oxygen was honestly the worst way to die, it was like torture having the life sucked out of you as you clung on for dear life as if it would help. Out of instinct her hands grabbed his wrists as if trying to escape, clawing at him as she wriggled in his grasp trying to break free as she battled against the loss of oxygen. Even though it had been a few moments it felt like a lifetime when struggling to breathe and when he had finally released her, she gasped trying to regain composure.
Unable to stop the tremble as she keeled over still gasping for air, she took hold of the bookcase steadying herself as her other hand massaged her neck, even without his hand there she could still feel it like it had left a lasting impression. Touching the soft skin of her neck only caused her to wince as she could feel the area was tender after the attempt at her life. Thinking on it she thought it was probably to scare her and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t.
“W-What?” Managing to breathe out her words as her voice croaked adjusting to what had just transpired. Using the bookcase to keep herself upright as her chest heaved her lungs still desperately taking in the air that it had lost.
Narrowing her eyes as Elise watched him picking up the book tutting it as he continued to speak, wincing as he tore it in two.
“You wouldn’t!”
Flinching this time as he continued to tear up the book threatening her and she didn’t like it one bit, as the threats continued, she could feel a pounding in her head as she couldn’t help but watch him a mix of fear and determination through her eyes as a part of her didn’t want to back down. She knew she would have too as she needed to remind herself that she was at the disadvantage here especially whilst in enemy territory. With each rip of paper, she felt herself falter, every bit of confidence she once had broken into tiny pieces like it didn’t mean a thing and she felt her heart painful race within her chest because she was not ready to face her consequences.
“N-No… you can’t just kill them or launch a surprise attack. You can’t. That’s not… that’s not how you get peace.” Elise could feel her voice waiver at the idea he would just cut down everyone she loved her father and brother and then attack Novrandt no doubt killing innocents from it and she just could not stand the idea of it. Although her father and brother hadn’t seen fit to write to her, she still loved them, they were her family after all even if they had left her alone in enemy lands to fend for herself which she was currently doing a bad job at.
Elise fell silent as she saw the cruel smile grace his lips and she swallowed feeling the discomfort as she glanced to the door that he was making his way towards. Watching him like a hawk as stuck his head outside her hand itched towards another book, the urge to throw it at him again whilst he was off guard but before she could reach it her hand dropped at his words.
“Excuse me? Are you confining me to my rooms?” Sounding outraged at the idea he was just going to lock her away until she changed her mind, she was patient and being locked in her rooms wouldn’t change a thing on the fact that she did not wish to be enslaved to him for goodness knows how many years. Shaking her head, she gathered the remainder of her courage as she walked to the door with her head held high.
“I hope you’re ready to wait, because I won’t reconsider.” Elise knew it was stupid to try and even get in the last word, but she didn’t want him to think he had won just because he had resorted to physical violence and she had been scared for a moment. Stepping out of the library she began to walk towards her rooms not caring if his guards escorted her or not because she could make her own way there, hopefully it also meant that she was excused from any social gatherings.
It was at that moment she was sure she was about to be killed, strangled to death as she struggled to breathe. Loss of oxygen was honestly the worst way to die, it was like torture having the life sucked out of you as you clung on for dear life as if it would help. Out of instinct her hands grabbed his wrists as if trying to escape, clawing at him as she wriggled in his grasp trying to break free as she battled against the loss of oxygen. Even though it had been a few moments it felt like a lifetime when struggling to breathe and when he had finally released her, she gasped trying to regain composure.
Unable to stop the tremble as she keeled over still gasping for air, she took hold of the bookcase steadying herself as her other hand massaged her neck, even without his hand there she could still feel it like it had left a lasting impression. Touching the soft skin of her neck only caused her to wince as she could feel the area was tender after the attempt at her life. Thinking on it she thought it was probably to scare her and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t.
“W-What?” Managing to breathe out her words as her voice croaked adjusting to what had just transpired. Using the bookcase to keep herself upright as her chest heaved her lungs still desperately taking in the air that it had lost.
Narrowing her eyes as Elise watched him picking up the book tutting it as he continued to speak, wincing as he tore it in two.
“You wouldn’t!”
Flinching this time as he continued to tear up the book threatening her and she didn’t like it one bit, as the threats continued, she could feel a pounding in her head as she couldn’t help but watch him a mix of fear and determination through her eyes as a part of her didn’t want to back down. She knew she would have too as she needed to remind herself that she was at the disadvantage here especially whilst in enemy territory. With each rip of paper, she felt herself falter, every bit of confidence she once had broken into tiny pieces like it didn’t mean a thing and she felt her heart painful race within her chest because she was not ready to face her consequences.
“N-No… you can’t just kill them or launch a surprise attack. You can’t. That’s not… that’s not how you get peace.” Elise could feel her voice waiver at the idea he would just cut down everyone she loved her father and brother and then attack Novrandt no doubt killing innocents from it and she just could not stand the idea of it. Although her father and brother hadn’t seen fit to write to her, she still loved them, they were her family after all even if they had left her alone in enemy lands to fend for herself which she was currently doing a bad job at.
Elise fell silent as she saw the cruel smile grace his lips and she swallowed feeling the discomfort as she glanced to the door that he was making his way towards. Watching him like a hawk as stuck his head outside her hand itched towards another book, the urge to throw it at him again whilst he was off guard but before she could reach it her hand dropped at his words.
“Excuse me? Are you confining me to my rooms?” Sounding outraged at the idea he was just going to lock her away until she changed her mind, she was patient and being locked in her rooms wouldn’t change a thing on the fact that she did not wish to be enslaved to him for goodness knows how many years. Shaking her head, she gathered the remainder of her courage as she walked to the door with her head held high.
“I hope you’re ready to wait, because I won’t reconsider.” Elise knew it was stupid to try and even get in the last word, but she didn’t want him to think he had won just because he had resorted to physical violence and she had been scared for a moment. Stepping out of the library she began to walk towards her rooms not caring if his guards escorted her or not because she could make her own way there, hopefully it also meant that she was excused from any social gatherings.
I can't wait to explore him and the plans he is making, it will be a lot of fun.
Iris sighed to herself as Cas pointed out that she was more obvious than what she initially thought, something she knew she would have to work on especially as Cas was going through so much right now that he shouldn’t have to worry about her. Iris hated the idea of that, why add to his pile of troubles when she could feign ignorance and pretend like she was okay. If she willed it enough it would become true, it’s what her father used to do think on something so much that he truly believed it himself so if she started to believe that she was fine, then she would be fine. After all she had to be there for Cas.
Even with him saying she wouldn’t be here forever she was finding it hard to believe that herself, she was going to end up spending a lot of time in this hotel room and already she began to dread what her days would look like hidden away in this suite. Today for instance she had just wasted it all watching the TV and she didn’t want to spend every day gawping at stupid programs that didn’t take her mind off of anything. I’m being selfish, aren’t I? I should be thankful I have a roof over my head, not complaining about it all. Not whilst Cas is about to inherit a country and has far more important things to be worried about. Fiddling with the sleeves of her clothing as she listened to him on the phone she tried not to sound disheartened at the fact that this wouldn’t just be over in a day.
It didn’t stop her from her original train of thought and for a split second she had nearly voiced it down the phone which would have only made things worse. That this was too much hassle than needed, that it would just be easier if she went back to the districts and went about her life without him. Things would have been so different if she had been born into any other family, maybe it would have been different if her mother hadn’t have died and her father wasn’t obsessed with bringing down the monarchy. Life would have been simple and a part of her wished it could be, maybe it was still an option for her if she left this hotel room. If she was caught she’d be thrown back in a cell and killed as his fathers orders of her would still stand until Cas could override them. Would it be so bad? Cas would probably do so much better without me. What if I am holding him back?
Smiling to herself as he returned the I love you she wasn’t prepared for how this call had gone. At first, she had thought it would just be nice to talk to him and that they could just talk random nonsense that would make one another happy. It hadn’t been the case though, instead she was left feeling more anxious and worried than before because nothing was set in stone on what would happen now. “Of course I will, don’t party too hard without me okay? Sleep well…” It was easy to sound okay over the phone, but she was thankful he couldn’t see the look on her face as she knew it would only worry him. “Well as long as you didn’t buy me anything fancy to eat, I’m sure I will be fine.” Making a bit of a joke at the end of it, her eating habits weren’t that great in general but she would try for him.
As she said her goodbye over the phone, she ended the call only to hang her head as a sigh escaped her, the phone now held loosely in her hand as she took in the call. Iris knew it wouldn’t be forever, but she doubted she would be able to keep herself sane here being left to her own thoughts. Moving off of the sofa she moved to the kitchen to return the phone back to its stand as she walked into the room she ran her fingers across the smooth marble worktops in her suite already on edge. Nothing seemed to go right for them and she knew it had to be a sign that maybe they should quit whilst they were ahead.
Even with him saying she wouldn’t be here forever she was finding it hard to believe that herself, she was going to end up spending a lot of time in this hotel room and already she began to dread what her days would look like hidden away in this suite. Today for instance she had just wasted it all watching the TV and she didn’t want to spend every day gawping at stupid programs that didn’t take her mind off of anything. I’m being selfish, aren’t I? I should be thankful I have a roof over my head, not complaining about it all. Not whilst Cas is about to inherit a country and has far more important things to be worried about. Fiddling with the sleeves of her clothing as she listened to him on the phone she tried not to sound disheartened at the fact that this wouldn’t just be over in a day.
It didn’t stop her from her original train of thought and for a split second she had nearly voiced it down the phone which would have only made things worse. That this was too much hassle than needed, that it would just be easier if she went back to the districts and went about her life without him. Things would have been so different if she had been born into any other family, maybe it would have been different if her mother hadn’t have died and her father wasn’t obsessed with bringing down the monarchy. Life would have been simple and a part of her wished it could be, maybe it was still an option for her if she left this hotel room. If she was caught she’d be thrown back in a cell and killed as his fathers orders of her would still stand until Cas could override them. Would it be so bad? Cas would probably do so much better without me. What if I am holding him back?
Smiling to herself as he returned the I love you she wasn’t prepared for how this call had gone. At first, she had thought it would just be nice to talk to him and that they could just talk random nonsense that would make one another happy. It hadn’t been the case though, instead she was left feeling more anxious and worried than before because nothing was set in stone on what would happen now. “Of course I will, don’t party too hard without me okay? Sleep well…” It was easy to sound okay over the phone, but she was thankful he couldn’t see the look on her face as she knew it would only worry him. “Well as long as you didn’t buy me anything fancy to eat, I’m sure I will be fine.” Making a bit of a joke at the end of it, her eating habits weren’t that great in general but she would try for him.
As she said her goodbye over the phone, she ended the call only to hang her head as a sigh escaped her, the phone now held loosely in her hand as she took in the call. Iris knew it wouldn’t be forever, but she doubted she would be able to keep herself sane here being left to her own thoughts. Moving off of the sofa she moved to the kitchen to return the phone back to its stand as she walked into the room she ran her fingers across the smooth marble worktops in her suite already on edge. Nothing seemed to go right for them and she knew it had to be a sign that maybe they should quit whilst they were ahead.
Haha ikr!? Though Elise knows she is treading such a thin line right now that she will definitely buckle first.
Maybe Ozragad does both? Threatens the safety of her men, but also keeps her confined to her rooms to show her that she really has no say in it whatsoever because she really doesn’t. I think it would lead nicely into an assassination attempt, either side could work as if someone tries to kill Elise and Ozaragad puts a stop to it she’ll soften up realising that he doesn’t actually want her dead and thinks on what Lady Cheldarine says on how he isn’t actually a bad person and can make a decent husband if given the chance. If we went with an attempt against Elise it could happen if she tries to flee the castle because she’ll be stupid enough to try and make a run for it and if she does that it leaves her open to such threats and an easy target.
If it was against Ozragad I think Elise would have to understand that if he gets overthrown it would be worse for her than having him alive. So perhaps whilst confined to her room the ladies tell her how she’d actually be worse off etc and about the pro-war faction who would rather see then both dead than peace.
I am happy to go with either sort of route, but I deffo think an assassination attempt will help turn things around a bit for them.
Maybe Ozragad does both? Threatens the safety of her men, but also keeps her confined to her rooms to show her that she really has no say in it whatsoever because she really doesn’t. I think it would lead nicely into an assassination attempt, either side could work as if someone tries to kill Elise and Ozaragad puts a stop to it she’ll soften up realising that he doesn’t actually want her dead and thinks on what Lady Cheldarine says on how he isn’t actually a bad person and can make a decent husband if given the chance. If we went with an attempt against Elise it could happen if she tries to flee the castle because she’ll be stupid enough to try and make a run for it and if she does that it leaves her open to such threats and an easy target.
If it was against Ozragad I think Elise would have to understand that if he gets overthrown it would be worse for her than having him alive. So perhaps whilst confined to her room the ladies tell her how she’d actually be worse off etc and about the pro-war faction who would rather see then both dead than peace.
I am happy to go with either sort of route, but I deffo think an assassination attempt will help turn things around a bit for them.
Elise could see Ozragad stand there for a moment as if taking in her words, something she instantly regretted saying because it wasn’t smart of her to let her emotions take over like she had. It put her in a dangerous position one she wouldn’t be able to defend herself in, and she was alone with him, none of her personal guards were near to come to her aid but what could they really do when going against a King? A Warlord no less who had stories of horror told throughout her own Kingdom. Treville of course would stand her ground and protect her, but the others would hesitate unsure on what their position was here, and she couldn’t blame them for that at all.
It wasn’t the smartest move on her side, to provoke someone that could easily overpower her and kill her within moments, and she wouldn’t be able to fight back as she was no fighter. Eyes of hers watching the dagger that had easily cut down the book she had hurled his way, a mess of paper on the floor which would just as easily be her own blood if she wasn’t careful. Happiness was never going to be on the cards for her, she had lost her freedom to serve this beast in a bid to bring peace and end the bloodshed of the war that had raged for years.
When he spoke, she felt her confidence falter, waiver as her gaze fell onto the dagger in his hands. Gripped so tightly she could see the whitening of his knuckles and her own heartbeat quickened as she started to think of some sort of escape. If not now, then certainly in the evening she could try to make a run for it whilst he slept. It seemed silly but to her running away had been a thought that crossed her mind on more than one occasion whilst being here, it was only now did she think it was more feasible with this threat before her. Elise had made up her mind, she would try to make a run for it and just disappear, they could find some other dutiful wife for this Fomori King as she would not be it.
Barely enough time to process what happened next her eyes widened in shock as she felt the grip of his hand against her neck, the strength of the hold and the weight of him easily overpowered her and steered her into the bookcase behind her. Wooden shelves crashing into her back and she bit back a sound of pain from the sheer force of what he had done. Knowing tomorrow that her pale skin would be stained by bruises sore from the impact of the wood against her body, but for a split second she had feared for her life. Feared that he would just in fact choke the life out of her and the war would continue on as if she had never existed.
Cringing as she heard him roar in her face, questioning her on how she had boldly stated she would never marry him she couldn’t help but wince as she felt the anger and rage and soon the knife came into view and she struggled against his hold even though it did nothing. “Never.” The whisper left her lips before she could even stop herself, even in the midst of fear she wanted him to know that she would never marry him. It was of no use really, she could deny the marriage all she wanted but her father would never allow it for starters and she honestly had no say when it came to her own fate on things like this. After all she would have always been bartered away to the highest bidder, that was her role in life.
“Go on, kill me. You’ll only prove to everyone your true intentions and that peace was never an option! I won’t marry you; and I certainly won’t bare your children so why don’t you just end my life?” Elise couldn’t say what possessed her to egg him on when she was clearly at a disadvantage with his hands around her throat, she wasn’t really thinking straight with the lack of sleep and the constant worry that someone was going to kill her here. She knew she would have to back down to him, she would have to concede, and it left a bad taste in her mouth thinking about it. Had Treville been here she wouldn’t have overstepped like she had, the guard knew when she was treading a fine line and would signal to her when she had so it usually meant she could catch herself before things went too far.
By now Elise could feel herself tremble in his grasp, fear settling in as she waited for him to hurt her as she had stepped out of line. Her heart hammered away in her chest at the anticipation which was only making her feel anxious, reaching her hand up clasping it around his wrist as she tried to pull him off of her neck so she could at least put distance between them, her back was beginning to ache and she just wanted to go hide away.
It wasn’t the smartest move on her side, to provoke someone that could easily overpower her and kill her within moments, and she wouldn’t be able to fight back as she was no fighter. Eyes of hers watching the dagger that had easily cut down the book she had hurled his way, a mess of paper on the floor which would just as easily be her own blood if she wasn’t careful. Happiness was never going to be on the cards for her, she had lost her freedom to serve this beast in a bid to bring peace and end the bloodshed of the war that had raged for years.
When he spoke, she felt her confidence falter, waiver as her gaze fell onto the dagger in his hands. Gripped so tightly she could see the whitening of his knuckles and her own heartbeat quickened as she started to think of some sort of escape. If not now, then certainly in the evening she could try to make a run for it whilst he slept. It seemed silly but to her running away had been a thought that crossed her mind on more than one occasion whilst being here, it was only now did she think it was more feasible with this threat before her. Elise had made up her mind, she would try to make a run for it and just disappear, they could find some other dutiful wife for this Fomori King as she would not be it.
Barely enough time to process what happened next her eyes widened in shock as she felt the grip of his hand against her neck, the strength of the hold and the weight of him easily overpowered her and steered her into the bookcase behind her. Wooden shelves crashing into her back and she bit back a sound of pain from the sheer force of what he had done. Knowing tomorrow that her pale skin would be stained by bruises sore from the impact of the wood against her body, but for a split second she had feared for her life. Feared that he would just in fact choke the life out of her and the war would continue on as if she had never existed.
Cringing as she heard him roar in her face, questioning her on how she had boldly stated she would never marry him she couldn’t help but wince as she felt the anger and rage and soon the knife came into view and she struggled against his hold even though it did nothing. “Never.” The whisper left her lips before she could even stop herself, even in the midst of fear she wanted him to know that she would never marry him. It was of no use really, she could deny the marriage all she wanted but her father would never allow it for starters and she honestly had no say when it came to her own fate on things like this. After all she would have always been bartered away to the highest bidder, that was her role in life.
“Go on, kill me. You’ll only prove to everyone your true intentions and that peace was never an option! I won’t marry you; and I certainly won’t bare your children so why don’t you just end my life?” Elise couldn’t say what possessed her to egg him on when she was clearly at a disadvantage with his hands around her throat, she wasn’t really thinking straight with the lack of sleep and the constant worry that someone was going to kill her here. She knew she would have to back down to him, she would have to concede, and it left a bad taste in her mouth thinking about it. Had Treville been here she wouldn’t have overstepped like she had, the guard knew when she was treading a fine line and would signal to her when she had so it usually meant she could catch herself before things went too far.
By now Elise could feel herself tremble in his grasp, fear settling in as she waited for him to hurt her as she had stepped out of line. Her heart hammered away in her chest at the anticipation which was only making her feel anxious, reaching her hand up clasping it around his wrist as she tried to pull him off of her neck so she could at least put distance between them, her back was beginning to ache and she just wanted to go hide away.
Literally was just going to say that! I forgot how tense it was haha.
Oh no I loved it! If I ever feel uncomfortable I'll let you know, but I'm pretty cool with a lot so don't worry!
Oh no I loved it! If I ever feel uncomfortable I'll let you know, but I'm pretty cool with a lot so don't worry!
Hahaha I think Iris is slowly starting to see he won't let her get away with it xD
That sounds good! We can do coronation day and I can set up the plans with Ethan then maybe skip a little bit.
That sounds good! We can do coronation day and I can set up the plans with Ethan then maybe skip a little bit.
“I can imagine, I’m sure it’s a welcome relief to have the bourbon though.” Iris mused as she continued talking over the phone to Cas, it felt strange this distance and as much as she tried not to think about it talking like this only had her worried for the future. Especially as they both knew she could not stay in that hotel room forever, but for now she kept quiet as talking about it would get them nowhere and would no doubt just upset them both when it wasn’t really needed. Iris knew she should just be grateful she was alive and had somewhere nice to sleep for the night, albeit it alone without him.
Grinning to herself as the compliment was taken well, she was glad she could support him even if it was from afar, she was thankful he appreciated it none the less. It was unlikely he had much support or even compliments about the way he did things, after learning about his father and the kind of relationship he had with him she felt the need to tell him he’d done good. Knowing personally just how much of a difference it could make if someone supported him and that was something, she found herself wanting to do.
Hearing him say the words that he missed her offered both comfort and yet sadness because it was a grim reminder that right now, she couldn’t be a part of his life. Iris didn’t even know or understand everything that he would now have to do, but she did know it would mean that they would be apart again for a little while. Already she could feel the sinking feeling in her chest knowing that it could be a while until she saw him again, the cheeky smile and warm eyes that looked at her with such care. Sighing softly to herself as she looked at the empty room before her phone against her ear as she thought on how lonely this was going to be, how she should maybe just duck out of the hotel and slip back into the districts so he needn’t worry about her and could focus on leading a country.
“You can’t know I skipped dinner!” Pulled from her thoughts as she took the defence instantly only to find herself inwardly cringing because he was right. Never had she been the one to take care of herself or even worry about herself because she felt her life was insignificant compared to others. “I’m sorry… I just kind of spaced out a little here zoned in on the programs I forgot. I also… well. I didn’t want to overstep and before you start to lecture me or have a go you know what I’m like when it comes to expense.” Nibbling at the bottom of her lip once more trying to explain herself, “I know you say it’s fine. I know that, but I also know it’s not cheap here… I can’t stay here forever, and I just hate the idea that I’m leaching off of you. Which I know you say I’m not and that it’s fine… I guess I just overthink it as I feel bad sometimes knowing I can never afford something like this or even dream of repaying it back.”
Pausing for a moment she sat up on the sofa pulling her knees up to her chest, “I promise I will eat what you’ve sent up though. Thank you.” Iris wouldn’t just let the food go to waste and whatever she didn’t eat she could save for later. Finding her eyes trail down to the floor she couldn’t help the small sigh that escaped her lips when he said he didn’t know when they could see each other, a cold hard truth she didn’t want to hear. It had been wishful thinking it could be soon, but he was right, there had to be so much going on that seeing her wasn’t something he would be able to do. “I know… I’m sorry I shouldn’t have brought it up. Wishful thinking, I guess.”
Hesitating at her next words she could feel the lump in her throat, “Cas I…” Stopping herself before she really dropped herself in it she cursed at her own thoughts and completely changed direction on what she was originally going to say. “I love you okay… I’ll be here waiting for you.” Trying to keep her tone upbeat as she was honestly about to put her foot in her mouth by bringing up something that they had yet to voice between each other. If they could really have a future together and make it work with everything going on. Now wasn’t the time, not when he had just lost his father and was about to be King, she couldn’t bring up something like that as she had to support him.
Grinning to herself as the compliment was taken well, she was glad she could support him even if it was from afar, she was thankful he appreciated it none the less. It was unlikely he had much support or even compliments about the way he did things, after learning about his father and the kind of relationship he had with him she felt the need to tell him he’d done good. Knowing personally just how much of a difference it could make if someone supported him and that was something, she found herself wanting to do.
Hearing him say the words that he missed her offered both comfort and yet sadness because it was a grim reminder that right now, she couldn’t be a part of his life. Iris didn’t even know or understand everything that he would now have to do, but she did know it would mean that they would be apart again for a little while. Already she could feel the sinking feeling in her chest knowing that it could be a while until she saw him again, the cheeky smile and warm eyes that looked at her with such care. Sighing softly to herself as she looked at the empty room before her phone against her ear as she thought on how lonely this was going to be, how she should maybe just duck out of the hotel and slip back into the districts so he needn’t worry about her and could focus on leading a country.
“You can’t know I skipped dinner!” Pulled from her thoughts as she took the defence instantly only to find herself inwardly cringing because he was right. Never had she been the one to take care of herself or even worry about herself because she felt her life was insignificant compared to others. “I’m sorry… I just kind of spaced out a little here zoned in on the programs I forgot. I also… well. I didn’t want to overstep and before you start to lecture me or have a go you know what I’m like when it comes to expense.” Nibbling at the bottom of her lip once more trying to explain herself, “I know you say it’s fine. I know that, but I also know it’s not cheap here… I can’t stay here forever, and I just hate the idea that I’m leaching off of you. Which I know you say I’m not and that it’s fine… I guess I just overthink it as I feel bad sometimes knowing I can never afford something like this or even dream of repaying it back.”
Pausing for a moment she sat up on the sofa pulling her knees up to her chest, “I promise I will eat what you’ve sent up though. Thank you.” Iris wouldn’t just let the food go to waste and whatever she didn’t eat she could save for later. Finding her eyes trail down to the floor she couldn’t help the small sigh that escaped her lips when he said he didn’t know when they could see each other, a cold hard truth she didn’t want to hear. It had been wishful thinking it could be soon, but he was right, there had to be so much going on that seeing her wasn’t something he would be able to do. “I know… I’m sorry I shouldn’t have brought it up. Wishful thinking, I guess.”
Hesitating at her next words she could feel the lump in her throat, “Cas I…” Stopping herself before she really dropped herself in it she cursed at her own thoughts and completely changed direction on what she was originally going to say. “I love you okay… I’ll be here waiting for you.” Trying to keep her tone upbeat as she was honestly about to put her foot in her mouth by bringing up something that they had yet to voice between each other. If they could really have a future together and make it work with everything going on. Now wasn’t the time, not when he had just lost his father and was about to be King, she couldn’t bring up something like that as she had to support him.
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