Recent Statuses

5 days ago
Current Yup. That's the smell of shameless self promotion:…
1 like
5 days ago
It smells like... is that?


User has no bio, yet

Most Recent Posts

Isaac looked at himself in the mirror again and sighed. He didn't have to go. He could give as many excuses as he wanted to. Most of them good ones.

He looked at his phone, scanning through the texts. No. He had to go. He'd kick himself if he didn't.

Isaac stood, feeling a little bit silly in his getup but also a little proud of himself. He'd probably spent something like 30 bucks on the stuff for this stupid costume. Alright. He'd go. Otherwise all this effort was for nothing. Besides, maybe he'd...

He stopped himself from going down that road mentally. Not a good idea.

Isaac pulled his coat on and made his way to his truck. He might need some of his things while he was there, after all. It took 3 tries to get the engine to turn over but it did, and he made his way towards Ron's place.

He pulled up to the house and sat in his truck for a little while, just taking in the sights before he did anything. Getting his bearings. With a huff of air, he opened the door and scooched out onto his feet, leaving the comfort of the heaters.

He knocked on the door in his particular rhythm. Everyone knew when he was at the door, because he always used the same knock. It was a silly habit that he couldn't seem to shake.

When they door opened, the guests in attendance would be treated to the sight of Isaac wearing a sequin-covered cowboy hat, a giant pair of sunglasses, a loudly red coat with tassles on the arms, and a surprisingly good impression of Randy Savage saying "Oh yeah, Brother!"

Isaac smiled and laughed at himself sheepishly after. "Not too bad, right?"
I got a shitload of interest, so I'm closing down until some of the heat dies down.

Thanks everyone!
I'm going to lose, but I was here.
It's been 4 hours. Time to BUMP.


_ Hungry For More
_ Sluggish
X Satiated

Hello mortals, and welcome to my cavern. You're probably wondering why I'm speaking like this and what the fuck it is I want from you.

I want RPs. Duh.
Was there even a question about it? Look at what forum this is!
If you're not here for that, you're in the wrong place.


Let us begin with my

with me, anyways

The First Precept

I am a upper-casual - low advanced RPer. I'm a wee bit rusty and I'm new to this forum and its particulars, but I've been in the RP game for 15 damn years so if I still suck at it what the hell am I even doing? Therefore, I don't suck at it. Convincing argument, eh?

I will post as much as I'm able. This may mean multiple posts per day, or maybe just one. Most of my posting is from Mobile rather than computer, so please bear that in mind when considering length. My poor widdle thumbs get tired, ok? But I should produce a solid 3 paragraphs for most posts, even at my fast pace. Considering that I'm posting almost exclusively from devices not made for longform typing to any degree, I think that's reasonable. I expect that my partners perform similarly. I'm not going to crucify you if our characters are speaking quietly in a calm location and things tail off, length-wise. That's fine. Not every line of dialogue in a novel is accompanied with a fuckin' 3 paragraph description. It's fine. But it should be rare.

The Second Precept

My romances are at a medium-slow burn. I don't want it to take ages, but I also don't want them to gaze upon each other and instantly tear their clothes off and have at it like bunnies on viagra. I'm totally fine with smexy scenes, and I'm fine with fading to black. Casual gore is fine. If you wanna write incredible detail about each individual bone and sinew being torn asunder and go on long tirades about the guts and blood... you need a therapist. And probably someone else to RP with. Weirdly, little bits of body horror I'm fairly ok with. Just don't go fuckin' nuts. Then again horror will be fairly rare. I'm looking for pairings of:
MxF (me as male in this case)
MxM (but only one very particular circumstance, which you'll have to PM me for.)
I'm also into other stuff but you'll have to ask me via PM.

With all this being said, YOU MUST BE 18+ TO RP WITH ME. I'm an old fart. So maturity is a plus, so as not to fuss with my old fart sensibilities.

The Third Precept

If you're cool with me, I'm cool with you. Just be upfront about stuff and don't go beating around the bush. If you think I'm a dick, that's justifiable. Just let me know. Shit happens. I probably won't eat you and burn your village to ashes. Probably.

The Fourth Precept

Most of my RPs are based in Settings. This means that I have a world/galaxy/universe/multiverse that is partially pre-prepared. Most of these are basically just bundles of aesthetic features rather than fully fleshed-out worlds. What this means is:
You can add stuff to them. Really. It's ok. I'm not gonna pitch a bitch fit over it. So long as it's consistent with the aesthetic, you're golden. (ie, if it's a Weird West setting, please don't try to add lasergun-toting space aliens. Wrong setting.)

The Fifth Precept

You don't need a fancy-ass character sheet. A name, age, sex, gender, brief little description of their appearance, wants, needs, and challenges. It shouldn't take you long. I like having characters build over time, so little CS's are just peachy for my purposes.

The Sixth Precept

This is the Don't Be A Dick clause.
Don't godmod. That's being a dick.
Don't steal control if you've got no narrative-based reason to do so. That's being a dick.
Don't go nuclear if things turn out poorly. That's being a dick.
Don't go spreading shit if the RP doesn't work out. That's being a dick.
Don't make a mary sue. That's... not technically being a dick but it's also no fun. (unless we're doing some kind of weird Mary Sue fight for the giggles, in which case whatever.)

The Seventh Precept

If I've missed anything, just PM me.
If you have a question, just PM me.
If you want to RP with me, just PM me.
If you want to have my babies, just PM me.
If you are so unbelievably turned on by the monstrous amount of sass in this post that you just NEED some hot lovin' right this very damn second, just PM me.

Here's the genres/aesthetics that tickle my pickle. The more +'s, the more it pickle-tickles.:
+Science-fantasy (see Tyr below for example)
+++Modern Fantasy (Specifically the Witch's Closet, see below.)
++Weird West (western, but with WIZARDS N' SHIT)
+Raygun Gothic
+Modern Romance (Just straight-up nowadays is OK, too.)

Here are the settings I'd like to RP in. We can discuss a plot once we're decided on the setting. Some example plots are included. All of these tickle my pickle, but The Witch's Closet is ticklin' something FIERCE.

Pairings I find interesting, to be used in any of the above, so long as they make sense:
Soldiers/Officers of opposing forces
A Hero/A Villain (doubly so when their alter egos are dating and don't know they're enemies. Yum.)
Royalty/Literally just some asshole
Monstergirl/monster slayer
monstergirl/ wandering merchant
monstergirl/ wandering nomad
Devil/human (Especially in Witch's Closet)

That's about it.

As said above, PM me, don't post here. If you post here, I know you didn't read JACK SHIT of what I wrote above, and I'll mock you for not knowing how to read. You've been warned, whether you read the warning or not.
Banned for being too poor to afford weird mac n cheese. 'Murica.
<Snipped quote by TheGrundlesnart>

I've no problem with it, tbh, so long as @shylarah and @HaleyTheRandom are on board as well

Cool. I'll await their judgements!
<Snipped quote by TheGrundlesnart>

oh shit my bad it's not in this thread, but here's the copy-pasted rule about non-royals! hope this helps :) and im glad to hear it!!! super excited to see what you come up with

𝓝on-royal characters are allowed; however, keep in mind that if you make a servant or something, there would be a lot of events that your character wouldn't realistically be able to participate in. The co-GMs and I recommend creating nobles/aristocrats if you're going to go down the non-royal route; we also ask that you consult with us beforehand

Ok, as part of consulting:

What about a Photographer? If this is as big a deal as is hoped, someone will need to be there to *tastefully* document the goings-on for future nostalgia purposes.

Probably wouldn't be present for EVERYTHING, and would of course try to be discreet, but they would be likely to be present for more events than your average servant. Especially if they're a royally appointed historian or something.

Just a thought. I can do a royal instead or in tandem.
Where is that Rules section found? I might want to do a nonroyal because I like to make things difficult for myself.

Also I'm expressing interest. I'm down to gown, as it were.
Banned for banning before 5 hours have elapsed.
© 2007-2017
BBCode Cheatsheet