Hidden 8 days ago Post by Bork Lazer
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Bork Lazer Chomping Time

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$$$




> PLEASE ENTER CUSTOMER RFID SEQUENCE
> *********
> ERROR. 2 ATTEMPTS LEFT.
> *********
> ERROR. WARNING. 1 ATTEMPT LEFT UNTIL CUSTOMER MALFEASANCE PROTOCOL ACTIVATION.
> *********
> SUCCESS.
> WELCOME, TED WILLIAMS. HOW MAY WE HELP YOU TODAY?
> ACCESS AUDIO JOURNAL
> PROCESSING........


WAL-INCORPORATED CO PTY LTD

Always Low Prices


Date: May 25th, 2085
From: Samuel Walton Junior, Supreme Executive President of Wal-International
To: All Registered Empl0yee Citizens
Subject: Our New Expansion Initiative And Other Matters Of Importance

[ERROR]-proud to announce the creation of over 45 new branches including Wal-Power, Wal-Education, Wal-Agriculture and Wal-Fashion along with the acquisition of over 400 new businesses in the last year. We are confident that these mergers will irove - [ERROR]

[ERROR]- better or worse, our model for success has been an inspiration for our competitors worldwide. All registered employee citizens who are found to the IKEA Mega-Centre Zone or Alibaba will be rendered non persona gratas and executed immediately upon sight by Security - [ERROR][ERROR]

- ember to review our su̶̱̻̺͐̐͒͗̇͋́͊̕m̴̫̥̙̹̖͖̠̏͑͆͝ṁ̵͚͎͚̼̰̳̝̯̲̎̌̾͘̕̚͠é̶̟̹͇̯̿̽̔͝ř̶̤̫͑̓̈́͂̓̕̚͝ ̷̢͈̺̜̉̓̀̈c̵̜̔̒͑a̴̢͇̣̝͝ţ̵̦̼̻̺̻͋̈́ḁ̷̠̄̌͐͌ļ̶͔̠͙̜̮̣͕̹̽̀̾̐̈́̂̑͠ó̷̢̻̓̇̑͐͆̄͠g̴̯̝͎̖̘̪̥̿͝ ̴̡̛͈̺̞̭̰͎͙̎̈́̄̀̕f̵̰͕͓̩̀̇͊ͅo̵̧̩̱͇̘͗́̎̾̄̀̔͑ṙ̴̬̝̱̭͓̖̐́́͗̿̚ ̷̡̘͋̈ṱ̸̦̩͊͑͋͊́̌̑̃h̶̨̜͚̭͉̀͛̆ͅe̷̛̠̩̎̃̇͑̓̈́́͠ ̶̠̦͇̪̎͛́b̵̙̐͝e̵̟̲̎͋̎͠s̵̤̦͉̹̳̼͒̓̀̍̄̓̒͠t̸̥̩̋͋̀͌̉ ̵̧̢̨̝̖̬̯̱̩̓̃̽͆̂̕͝͝p̸̙̲͇͋̊̔̈́̿r̴̨̠͓͚̻̩̾̀͋̑̐į̴̫͔̞̯̰̗̗̭̓̒́̋͑́ĉ̶̯̩̟̹̫͛̈́̊̌͗e̴͉̥̗̺͑̆̇́̑͜ͅś̷̹̥͈̳͈̗̮̍̍̈́̕ ̵̺̦̦͇͉̍̕̕ȧ̶͉̖̣̝̦̗͍̀̽̚n̴̼̭̙̖͙̂̒͊͑͐͝d̴͕̟͇̂͝ ̷͉̠̦͕̞͚̹̤̅e̶̡̛̝̭̎̐̆͊́̾̅̚n̵̡̧̞̟̹̤͓̯̎̇̎͠ͅt̸̳̋̓͐͝ě̶̱͖̃̚r̷̬̦̱͙͚̒͗̋́̊́̒͂͠ ̴̬̪̘͈̭͎̮̂̑̈́̍͛̋͝ŏ̷̤̲̺̺͔̠̽̿́͆͑u̷͔͎̯̔͆̀̕ŗ̵̹̜̦̦̯̱̄͐̃̈͒ ̷̝̓e̴̢̟͎̘̼̺̮̼̘͛̄͆͑̐̕͘͠x̴̢̰͍̣͔̮̩̲͈̑́͐̈́͑̄͘͝͝c̷̟͎̱͇̋͌̐͜ͅl̴̛̮͙̻͑͒͋͠ú̴̧̡̜̗͖̙͖̰͓̓̐̎̎͗̀s̴͇̥͆̉͋͊̂̈́̇̒̍i̵̡͍̩̼̺̥̗̥͋̉͗ͅv̵̢̻̮̰͓̗̯̋̊̉͆͘̕ė̶͕͈͉͕̙̣̽̀̆͐̔̾ ̸̪̪̮̲͈͂̊W̶̛̩̩͕͗͑̊̈́̋̚͝͠a̵̛͈͙̣͇̝̪̱̾͌̓̂̄̚ͅl̵̼̗͗̇̌̌̃̊̑̅̉-̸̲͔̱̂̄̊̒̈́P̶͎͎̥̦̘̘̮͍̝̊͑̄͗͋͌͠ȁ̷͎̼͛̌̓͑̇̅̒c̶̢̥̞͎̤̓̒̏̔̉̂͜ĥ̴̬͉͖͆̈́į̴͔̻̟̲̇̎̋̍̚̚n̸̡̩̘͎̩͔͠ķ̸͙̘͔̜̟̜̻͐͂͊̐͊̚ȏ̸̡̨͚̖̽̀̉̕ ̷̻͉̣͇͊̉͂̌͜L̴̦̠̖̜͈̭̞̰͋̏o̴͉͓̞͑̀͆͗͂̈́̕͘͝t̴̨̲̭̰͖̣̔͐̇̑̋̂ͅt̸̡̳̱͎̦̠̭͐̌͋͊͑͊͒̕͝e̷̮͚͑͌͜r̶̼͍̹̦̊̽̂̋̒͛̃̇ÿ̸̯͉́̃͒̃͐ ̶̣͚̙̼͇̥̇̒̆̐̾̾̆̾͝ṭ̷̞̼̗̦͐o̵̼̘͖̰̩̊̌͐͊͌̍ ̷̜̺͇̞̃̏͂̈́̾-̵̡̥̤̣͈̫̤̃
̶̢̤͈͉̘̝͍͋́͒̌̌̊

> DAILY SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT PLUG IN FAILED. REBOOTING......

> ACCESSING JOURNAL



Day 4812. Location. South of Fort Monopoly. Condition. Tired.

Eternity have passed since I walked through these endless aisles, yet, I have not expired. Time has lost its meaning. Truths have become inseparable from lies, as the PA system wails above me in saccharine chants. In my walleted heart, the Great Sam knows only these four words to be true.

The Wal is All.

I’ve seen sights you wouldn’t believe. A sky of fluorescent lights. Valleys of discarded shelves. Hills of refuse. Glaciers of refrigeration units. Conga lines of shopping carts stretching for miles. I’ve known plenty who claimed to have escaped through the Gates of Sliding and into the promised lands of the Parking Lots.

Lies.

There is no exit. There is no entrance. There is no end or beginning.

The Wal is All.

It is now a time of tense stability. I thank the Great Sam that the Smilers are still feuding among another like the barbaric Grocery tribes. Years have passed since the last major Sport, departments such as the Stationary Shogunate and the Clothing Kingdoms licking their wounds. Brand gangs patrol and exercise control over their insignificant turfs whilst aislers such as the Dorfs and Cereai take up the mantle of heroism.

To be mad is to be sane.

The Wal is All.

More and more rogue Wal-Tech stalk the shelves with Management constantly releasing new and horrible products. There have been rumors of Nevergrow and Amblouceti encroaching on nearby settlements in the Eastern Wal. Just this week, I saw a Security Bot carrying away a poor soul for shoplifting in the Alcohol section. He's probably a Greeter by now. The Fall Seasonal comes closer and the Stockers will soon approach in full force.

Despite our progress, we are still ants walking in the footsteps of monsters.

We are the Wal. We live in the Wal. We die in the Wal.




$$$




//PREMISE


The Wal is All.

Long after a world-shattering nuclear cataclysm known as the Fall, the last remaining survivors have taken refuge inside residential mega-marts owned by the now defunct global conglomerate corporate nation, Wal-Incorporated. Trapped within these colossal superstructures from the horrors of the outside world, these survivors fought amongst one another for control of the resources of the mega-marts and against the malfunctioning robotic Associates that once served mankind, now targeting all of humanity as ‘shoplifters’.

Centuries later, humanity has splintered into bands of settlements, the largest and most organised of these settlements being known as ‘Departments’. War and conflict between neighbouring departments wreak the Wal. Religious cults and lunatic gangs prey upon poor aislers, desperate to make a living. Mutants such as giant pigeons, rat-people and giga-roaches now roam the hallways. All the while, the malevolent Management observes from above, plotting and controlling the endless hordes of bots that patrol the mart.

Players will take the role of Lifters. Lifters are mercenaries, saleswords, bounty hunters, treasure hunters, an aisler willing to do any job for the right price or coupon. You’re no veteran Bargain Binner but you’re sure as hell no dollar store Cheapskate. You also may be slightly mad, or not. Surviving this long in the Wal usually comes with the cost of your sanity.

So, where does your story begin?

It has been a month after the last Black Friday and merely a week after the signing of a landmark treaty between the Stationary Shogunate and the Clothing Dynasties. You could care less about the political ramifications this poses to the other departments and more about the job you've been recently hired for. The Library of the Bookshelves have hired you as an escort for a treasure hunting expedition. The pay is good but your contractor almost maddeningly discloses little information about the treasure you are trying to find.

Is it the fabled 32nd flavor of Baskin Robbins Ice Cream? The legendary 100% off coupon? A Pre-Fall Wal-Tech manuscript?

No one on the expedition knows except for the leader himself, Field Archivist Ken-Dal.

It's night. You and the rest of the expedition are camping out in the middle of abandoned Dorf territory, ruined Forts that have been uninhabited for several decades after the Nevergrow invasion. You take this as an opportunity to rest, the fluorescent lights dimming above you and your feet aching after days of non-stop walking.

Little did you know that your expedition would take the turn for the worse.




Oh boy, here I go GMing again!

So, to put this in as few details as possible, I'm looking for a batch of 4-5 players who are willing to join a narrative based RP primarily focused on player interactivity and heavy amounts of action. Keep in mind first and foremost that this is a satirical RP that is a pastiche of modern consumer capitalism.

Please ask any questions if you do. This is merely a thread to gauge interest. I will make the OOC thread after one week if there is enough interest. If there is significant interest, I will strike while the iron is hot.
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Hidden 7 days ago Post by Humble1
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Humble1

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Now this is original. I'm curious to see how it developes.
Hidden 7 days ago Post by SilverRain
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SilverRain

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Interested!
Hidden 6 days ago Post by Rapid Reader
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Rapid Reader

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You have my interest and sword, most honorable GM.
Hidden 1 day ago Post by Bork Lazer
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Bork Lazer Chomping Time

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One more bump before I make the OOC on Monday most likely.
Hidden 14 hrs ago Post by Jarl Coolgruuf
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Jarl Coolgruuf The Mellower

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Why the hell not? I'm in.
Hidden 9 hrs ago Post by Rapid Reader
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Rapid Reader

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Imma write a Honey Nut Cheerio Cerai (basically a cardboard knight).
Hidden 8 hrs ago Post by Jarl Coolgruuf
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Jarl Coolgruuf The Mellower

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Current idea is Milwaukee, a painted warrior from the Home Improvement Department sent out to explore the aisles beyond their domain. Many-Nails, Khan of Tools and Lumber, seeks new shelves to bring into the empire, new resources to fuel the conquest of the Saw Dust Horde's neighbors, and treasures to rub in the faces of the Plumbing Clan to show them once and for all that Tools and Lumber is best suited to lead the other clans to glory.

I'll probably change it later
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