Recent Statuses

24 days ago
Current "When you get to the point where you can laugh at your mistakes, you'll find new things to replace what you lost."
1 like
2 mos ago
"Damn stupid sun, making it morning whenever it wants even though I'm sleepy. Who does it think it is? Doesn't it know it has me to thank for its continued existence? "
4 mos ago
"I am Ferdinand von Aegir"
5 mos ago
"While masticating steadily away, I ponder a certain philosophical dilemma --- Do beans have emotions?"
1 like
5 mos ago
"Bullpup is the ultimate form of assault rifle. Don't @ me"



It seems you have stumbled onto my profile, you poor soul. To have interacted with me in some form, or to have witnessed my influence... I can't help but pity you, who has now been tainted. But there is nobody here to blame but yourself. Surely you heard the warnings, right? About the 25 year old man who has trained since birth in the art of weeb and tism? The legend who leaves salt and degeneracy behind, wherever he may appear? The guy who can't break low platinum in League because his teammates are trash, no seriously that's entirely it I swear on my life this game is rigged?

Fools. All of you.

Maybe you need a few more details about me, if only to truly comprehend the situation you're in.

To some, I am known as Dalton. To many, it's usually Pants or Famished, but really go for whatever, I don't mind. It may come as a surprise to find out that I tend to enjoy watching anime. If I had to give a preferred genre, it's the ones with cute girls in it, bonus points for kitsune, and even more points for kitsunes that cook delicious meals for the protagonist after a long day's work. Typically, however, I just watch whatever looks fun during the season.

But I also play video games, too. I've wasted years of my life on League of Legends, a relationship in which there is no escape. But I've played countless games that aren't just Stockholme Syndrome in disguise, like Metal Gear Solid, and Devil May Cry, those two being my favorite series, which I'm sure most will gather by interacting with me, since about 85 percent of what I say is a shitpost relating to either of those games. I also enjoy fighting games, like MvC3, Soul Calibur, and Under Night In-Birth, to name a few.

I'm a man who can enjoy a nice visual novel, either for its engaging plot and deep characters with a interesting setting and hook, or because the girls look really cute and the H content is nice. Either one, really. You can find my list here but I don't think I've updated it in quite some time, so I've probably finished some of the stalled ones and played through ones I've not listed. As it should say, however, I am a big fan of Muv Luv and the original Fate, so I can't recommend those enough.

Finally, I should mention that the other 15 percent of my dialogue is inspired by actors that inspire me by their excellent performances. Some could even call them performance artists, because the work they do is indeed art. They're truly people who would appreciate the good advice your father gives you. People who not only appreciate the advice your dad gave you, but did so with guns. You can also call them legends, because that fits too. Also I think I got those switched up. 85 percent of my dialogue is inspired by gay porn, the remaining percent is shitposting about video games and weebshit. My b.

I know I said "finally" before this, but I really got to give thanks for those who help me persist throughout the years. Like my other half, AuditoryDeceasmentLord, the only man who can trade me blow-for-blow in autism. Or Zelly, for being such a cute degenerate, who I don't play with enough for some reason. Probably because I'm bad at inviting people and wait to get invited. Lastly, there's the piece I've been wanting to get out since I began writing. I'm sure the special person knows what it is too. Without further delay, allow me to say this with all my heart:

I hate you, Broken. You no-nippled baka. Fuck you for lurking. Fight me, cutie.

Most Recent Posts

<Snipped quote by FamishedPants>

You dont need to be a magical girl to me in my dreams uwu

Leave me alone.
Last magical girl I saw who could dive into other people's dreams indirectly led to the murder of most of the cast of the show.
S i l h o u e t t e

"*Ping*(Silhouette) flash 5:20"

So that's their quirk, is it?

Silhouette wasn't going to end this fight in a single move, much to her pl-- er, dismay. Though she fended off the strike by the chain, it did not cease at one attempt, placing Sil in a position where she could feasibly be attacked from in front as well as behind simultaneously. Some would call this a disadvantage, but it was not like Sil had no options here. She had no trouble thinking of a few different ways out, it was just that not all would be ideal. She eventually decided on one route that made use of what she considered her 'win condition' for this particular fight -- namely, spacing.

As was typically the case, Sil found herself in a disadvantage when it came to range. Really, the only time she ever out ranged anyone was when she was against a Fist user, but this simply meant she was accustomed to dealing with this sort of situation. Her M.O was rather straightforwards: Pressure her opponent, give them no space to breath, and land a decisive blow when an opening presents itself. Until this girl gave her reason to think otherwise, she'd assume this would be the best approach.


She did not run in a straight line towards her foe, her route having a slight outwards curve to it towards the side that wasn't blocked by chain. It wasn't much, but it was noticeable and her foe wouldn't have any trouble seeing she wouldn't be backing off. She knew she could reach her opponent before the chain behind her caught her, but that didn't mean she could slack off. Short as the time was between the chain's turn and Silhouette reaching nearly zero distance from the girl, she succeeded in placing her empty closed hand into Stasis with trace of her other hand, and then raising said fist across her chest, as though she intended to backhand the girl before her. Finally, as she reached striking range, her gaze dropped down and Sil suddenly vanished.

She immediately reappeared right behind her opponent, almost back-to-back, her fist still raised to her breast. With a sharp twist of her body, she would extend her arm and attempt to land a blow on the side of her opponent's head.
H i l a r i a

"Oh shit waddup."

— Hilaria

To many, it would be a rather strange sight to see a magical girl so casually strolling down the streets when things in Penrose had gotten so... eventful. Increased monster attacks and a rather zealous new faction joining the fray had most, if not all, magical girls in a bit of an upset. But not this one. As if it was nothing more significant than just a Tuesday, this one kept a rather bright expression in this darkness, and even hummed softly to herself as she carried along the sidewalk.

Her appearance would have appeared innocent, albeit out of place, were it not for the fact she was stained in blood. And not all of it was red, either. Contrary to her relaxed disposition, she hadn't been slacking off since she returned. Her patron required positive emotions in order to sustain itself, and what better way to obtain those than to save people from certain death at the hands of a being they'd never known existed? At least to Hilaria, this made the most sense. She would simply kill any monsters she happened across, and since they were so prone to attack nowadays, the short time she'd spent her had proved fruitful.

Hilaria suddenly stopped, hearing something not of the norm.

"Mm~?" she curiously glanced upwards, where the sound was coming from. "Eh~? Hilaria doesn't remember that sort of thing~" she said to herself as she watched a patrol car fly through the air, alarms blaring. She found it difficult to keep up with the ever-advancing world, as most of the time days felt like minutes to her. She almost felt like she could fall asleep and it'd be the next century, unless something was there to occupy her mind. So she did have to think about whether cars were yet currently capable of flight.

Remembering that as of yet, they weren't typically capable of such, Hilaria then came to the conclusion that probably meant something mystic was happening nearby. And, as if on cue, she began to hear gunfire nearby. "Hmm~ Can Hilaria save someone, I wonder~?" as if giddy at the idea of such, she found herself with an extra kick to her step.

Since she wasn't far off from the scene, Hilaria arrived to Billy's stage in a timely manner. She took note of her surroundings, particularly the many ghouls, and saw Billy charging at... was it Armadillo? She came in from the girl's flank and a bit behind, managing to catch a glimpse of her features and recalling her from the beach, though names often did elude her.

Armadillo will certainly be happy if we take this guy down together!

Or so the armored magical girl thought. It did not take any more for motivation to rush to aid the girl, even more so now that a rather vociferous pirate girl appeared, brandishing a ship furnished with obsolete, unreliable weaponry. Or maybe she just didn't like how they ended up making heavy armor pointless. Either way, with the assistance of the obnoxious ally, she'd continue on towards her original goal of jumping to the 'rescue' of Armadillo, by meeting Obsidian William and the ghoul truck head on, were they to continue past Armadillo. If they stopped, she would provide support with her shotgun.
E m i l y

"100 percent!"

— Emily

Emily had lagged behind the lich because of her attempts at contacting support for this fight, but it wasn't too hard to locate it once the sky started to change, and blatant signs of necromancer magics appearing. This lich made it very apparent that the word "subtle" was in its vocabulary. In a way that was a good thing, as it made it really difficult to lose the thing. On the other hand, she imagined she and whatever allies joined her would not make up the majority of the lich's audience.


She couldn't exactly rush in to a fight with a lich, could she? These things weren't just pushovers, after all. Emily understood she need to await help before committing to battle against it. That said, she couldn't twiddle her thumbs here. Sublime as it was, this melody probably wasn't just riveting -- it needed to be stopped. Gathering a ball of blue flame in one palm, she let loose a blast towards the girl, aspiring to distract her.

This was just my kind of tune, too...
What are alt accounts, my dude?

But if you want I can list some of my old OCs that might be interesting as NPCs if you tweak them to fit the setting? :)
S i l h o u e t t e

"I am a blade. A blade knows no fear. A blade knows no doubt. When faced with my enemy, I hesitate not."

A chill went up Silhouette's spine as the monster girl went on. She could not claim she was an Empath, but she certainly could tell what this girl before her was feeling. It was familiar. A lust for battle that could not be hidden, even by her convincing guise of an affable girl. Sil was quite irritated that her words had fallen upon deaf ears, but more so than that, was confusion as to why she could almost immediately tell what this girl was thinking. Fighting was what she was best at, but it was not as though she enjoyed the thrill of it.

Why lie to yourself?

Sil dropped into a lower stance, her blade raised before her chest, a glare shot directly at the monster girl. She was, however, worried about those words.

That was it. The Voice. A twisted existence that resulted from the use of the Black Coin. A foreign entity that had, since the graveyard incident, been mostly quiet. Aside from her first few attempts at an Penumbra clone, it hadn't tried anything. So why now, all of the sudden? It was unlikely to be of much use thinking about it. All she had to do was keep it under control and everything would be alright.

Shut up. I'm not a beast, I'm a professional.

Silhouette heard a mocking laugh in response, but nothing else. This was probably for the best. It wasn't as though she forgot about the obvious threat in front of her. The green-haired girl decided that they should 'introduce each other' through some particularly violent means, it would appear.

If that's how she wanted to play things, Sil would begrudgingly follow her lead. It would be best not to let her sense dull, after all. Particularly when the Ascendancy is roaming about.


Silhouette's free hand reached down to the small beast she had just slain, similar to a goblin in stature, her immediate response being to wait for the girl to come to her.

Despite her friendly demeanor while she was chatting, the girl now charging at Silhouette was completely stoic, and her movements were almost machine-like in how deliberate they were. Maybe she was something of a trained killer, too? No, Sil would not stand for something like this. If you pursued anything other than a business-like relationship with enacting death, you weren't any sort of professional. Blood-lust was the trait of a murderer, or a beast. And she certainly wasn't going to be grouped with one of those.

When Enkidu's chains reached the critical distance from her, Sil would raise the body up with one hand, having placed its corpse in Stasis, and would attempt to use it as a small shield. Though it's shape wasn't perfect for the task, she desired to deflect the blow and charge forwards with her knife, lunging for her gut.
S i l h o u e t t e


Silhouette couldn't lie to herself -- she was ecstatic. Like a child who had just opened a Christmas present, Sil found it hard not to jump for joy at her new ability: teleportation. Now she could be Corvo Attano make her way around with a swiftness she couldn't before, and ultimately what sort of assassin wouldn't want this kind of power? Naturally, she decided to make use of her time to practice with the ability by hunting monsters.

Monster hunting wasn't very high on Sil's priority list unless Veronica ordered it, but that did not mean she entirely avoided it. Bigger threats required attention, and if she so happened to hear rumors or stumble upon one, she did not see too much reason NOT to deal with it. They were a sort of pass time when she wasn't occupied, but she definitely didn't go out of her way, either. Except right now.

She wasn't hunting anything particularly strong, either, and both she and the beast realized that. After it initially attacked her and she effortlessly deal with its offense, it became aware of the fact it was no match for her, and fled. She, naturally, gave chase. At any point in this pursuit she could've picked up the pace and made done with it, but it provided her the opportunity to get a feel for her power, and so she blinked across rooftops to grow accustomed to it. But there was only so much fun to be had here, and the monster was not tireless. Eventually, it started gasping for air and its pace slowed to a crawl. Sil found herself sighing as she slowly drew nearer to the exhausted beast, taking a casual stance with the blade. She wasn't in the least worried about it, and even if it did manage some sort of attack, it wasn't likely to do much to her. But just as she raised her blade to attack, it gathered what remained of its strength and made one last hope across a rooftop.

"Troublesome fool."

It had to know that was a pointless move, but maybe that was a testament to its desire to survive? Someone may have considered such tenaciousness to be respectable, maybe, but Sil was not that person. She felt nothing but a slight irritation at the inconvenience she was made to endure. And with all the effort one would need to open a door, Sil made the jump to the next rooftop, plunging her knife deep into the tired beast's neck as she came down. It was a quick, clean kill.

Pulling her blade out of the beast, she thought on her next move. Rumor had it that the 'Beacon Ascendancy' had made its way into Penrose while she was stuck in the beach dimension. They seemed to be the equivalent of Magical Girl Crusaders, so naturally this meant that they were going to be a thorn in her side, as they frowned upon the existence of Dark Magical Girls. "Frowned upon" being a very generous way to put their fervor. It would probably be best to spend her coins in preparation for an eventual conflict.

"I suppose I should..." her eyes trailed up, where she spotted a green-haired magical girl not too far from her. The two were far too close for Silhouette's comfort, so she immediately drew herself into an aggressive stance, the words "Ready to strike" essentially written on her face. "Keep your distance." she warned the girl, not discarding the possibility this may have been a member of the Ascendancy at first, but upon further inspection, it was clear to Silhouette that wasn't the case -- this wasn't a normal magical girl.

S i l l y S h a d e

Samantha Howard

"This is where I bow out."

Stay in this false paradise and becoming something of a lotophage was perhaps appealing to some, but Silhouette had little interest in pretending everything was sunshine and roses with a bunch of magical girls, some of whom she'd clashed blades with. She wholeheartedly agreed with the general consensus that they should return to Penrose and resume their 'normal' lives, with all the despair, suffering, and violence that it entailed.

"I tire of this charade. There's no point in remaining here." it may not have been necessary to speak up since it was only natural that Samantha would follow shortly behind Veronica, whatever she did, but she had always openly argued against being in this place to begin with.

On the frlipside, Shade looked absolutely devastated at the direction things had turned. With each person voicing their complaints, the dire expression she wore worsened. It appeared much more serious than just enjoying the paradise. No, it looked almost as if each declaration against Dan's paradise was a knife in her gut.

Silhouette noticed this and tilted her head slightly. "What is your deal right now?" she asked plainly. If anyone, she should be able to understand her own 'self', but that apparently wasn't the case.

Samantha did not receive a proper answer from Shade, whose grave expression slowly turned to a wistful smile. Shade looked upon the majority of the girls one last time before turning to Samantha and placing a hand on her shoulder. "Just...don't forget me." and then returning to being the shadow she was. Were it not for the utter confusion that her shadow's actions had brought about, Sam might've betrayed the surprise she felt at the fact her shadow could even do that without her consent.

...I don't understand her, at all. I thought I was the brooding one.

E m i l y

"Short post from the shortcake~"

— Emily

Emily couldn't deny that she had enjoyed her time here. She did very much so. This paradise where none would harm each other and only need focus on enjoying themselves... it was so very delightful. But as Tetrad pointed out to her -- it was merely a farce, and while they dilly-dallied here, people were still suffering in Penrose. Knowing that there were people out there she could potential save made it all but impossible for her to ever consider permanently relaxing here, as fun as it was.

"Umm, I'm sorry, Dan, but there's still people out there who might need my help, so I can't stay." Emily told the dolphin as though she was apologizing. She did not think he deserved so much hate for trying to make people happy, even if he took the wrong approach to doing so.

H i l a r i a

"Now... does Hilaria try to trick boys out of food again? Naturally!"

— TL Note: Hilaria does so unintentionally

Hilaria thought that this was a well-spent vacation. At one point in her life she was much like Emily in that she had desired a world without strife or conflict. A place where all could be happy and none would live in fear or want. But that was... a long time ago. Now, a place like this would leave her with no purpose, no reason to keep on going. It was almost like her own personal hell, at least the idea of a permanent stay here was. It was okay in short bursts, but that was it. She'd had her fill and would be happy to get back to saving people in Penrose.

"Hmm~ Hilaria has had her fill, but she would like to go back to Penrose now." she told the dolphin. "But Hilaria would not be opposed to helping Dan if he needs it, because that's her job~!" she saw a poor, ignorant idealist in Dan. Most certainly a fool, but likely had only the best of intentions behind his actions. She'd seen these sorts turn into villains more often than not, but it was really up to the individual. She would do what she could to save him regardless, assuming he desired her help.
© 2007-2017
BBCode Cheatsheet