Love it! Love it! LOOOOVE it! Toad of the year, folks!
gorgenmast Member
- Last Seen: 4 days ago
- Joined: 12 yrs ago
- Posts: 1437 (0.32 / day)
- VMs: 9
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Username history
- gorgenmast 12 yrs ago
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Latest 10 profile visitors:
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Flagg,
Kassarock,
TokyoPewPew,
Mae,
Tlaloc
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Recent Statuses
3 yrs ago
LUV GOIN 2 A RENNASANZ FAIR. LOTTA FAGET NERDBOYS BUT GAWTDAMM I LUV THEM TURKYLEGS. COULD BOUTA DOZZEN OF THEM TASTY LIL FUCKS. LEMME GET A HELL YEAH BRUTHER
4
likes
3 yrs ago
MY PAPAW TOLLD ME 1 THING: SON WHEN UR MY AGE, UR GONA APPRESHIATE TAKIN A GOOD SHIT. AND BRUTHER, HE WUZ RITE! KEN I GETTA FUCKEN HELL YEAH?
5
likes
3 yrs ago
GONNA HAVE 2 DO SUM COMONITY SERVISE BC I GOT A FUKKIN DUI. I ASKED THE JUDGE IF HITTIN ON FAT-ASSED MEXICAN GIRLS CULD BE A SERVISE 2 THA CUMUNITY! LEMME GET A GOTTDAM HELL YEA BRUTTHER!!
3
likes
3 yrs ago
I like a man that knows what he wants. And I love when what he wants is to wear a pirate’s hat and poop on my chest whilst saying “Arr! Swab the poopdeck ye scurvy hedgepig!” Aye aye, daddy! 🥵😫🏴☠️
7
likes
3 yrs ago
MY UNCLE DONALD TAUGHT ME 1 THING: NEVER ITCH UR BUTTHOLE AFTER EATIN SUM HOT ASS CHICKEN WINGS! CAN I GET A HELL YEAH BRUTHER??
5
likes
Bio
lol who gives a shit
Most Recent Posts
Since I was a child all I ever wanted to do was sell diamonds and golf clubs and now these FUCKING MILLENNIALS ARE DESTROYING MY DREAM!!!1
FUCKING MILLENNIALS! I WILL KILL EVERY FUCKING MILLENNIAL! FUCK AVOCADO TOAST! FUCK NETFLIX! FUCK TINDER! FUCK YOU ALL! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
FUCKING MILLENNIALS! I WILL KILL EVERY FUCKING MILLENNIAL! FUCK AVOCADO TOAST! FUCK NETFLIX! FUCK TINDER! FUCK YOU ALL! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
The time-honored tradition of posting emojis in Spam is quickly dying out because today's young adults have lower incomes, shifting interests, and lifestyle choices. But we can't let this Spam staple go the way of the dinosaur. Post your best emojis here, ni🅱️🅱️as
That's nice, honey.
Another fine hedge-frog, dear sirrah. May your hens lay only brown eggs, and your girls keep all ten of their toes.
Fred is short for Fredward
Duke is short for Ducas.
These are quality toads, cherished chums. May you sire many boys of Circassian descent, and your goblets overflow with honeyed toadspawn. May you enjoy the fruits of the labor of others, and may you drink the blood of a Tatar horse-thief. May your womenfolk have all their teeth. May your serfs harvest many beets and few turnips.
Province/Kingdom/Faction/Tributary Name: 8th Outer Tract
Ruling Body: IA-appointed governor
Home Planet: Crucible
Primary Resource: Recycling alien building materials.
Armed Forces
(Leave this blank until the main IC thread is up with details about the technology available k thx.) mmkay
Imperial Assessment
In the course of the Most Stupendous Empire's inexorable expansion into the farthest reaches of the cosmos, Man has encountered numerous races of barbarous alien. Such was the case when colonists attempted to settle a system inhabited by an indigenous race 12 anni past. The name by which they called themselves was lost with their civilization, but Man knew them as the Aylma. When imperial colonists attempted to colonize planets settled by the Aylma, conflict arose as it so often does between Man and Xeno. The Aylma attempted to defend themselves from imperial incursion, but their's was a futile effort. Xeno resistance is always futile.
The Imperial Authority dispatched the 27th Tagma to the Aylma homeworld in response to Aylma resistance to colonization efforts. The battleships of the 27th, a Tagma trained for planetary assault, effortlessly subdued the pitiful defenses of the Aylma and sterilized their world from orbit. When the 27th left the system, the xeno homeworld was naught but a burnt cinder covered in ashes and ruins.
In the absence of the Aylma, the xeno world was occupied by criminal outcasts from the Empire. Living amidst the extensive xeno ruins, the lawless squatters were able to evade apprehension by the Imperial Authority. Piracy became rampant in the nearby 7th Outer Tract and it was clear that something needed to be done. The Imperial Authority dispatched forces to the planet once again; this time the 51st Tagma led by the disgraced Commodore Augustine Hellefax. The 51st captured the pirate strongholds and established Imperial control over the ruined world, which was summarily rechristened as Crucible. Commodore Hellefax was charged as governor of the newly-established 8th Outer Tract, responsible for rooting out all criminal enterprise and terraforming Crucible from a burnt cinder to a thriving colony.
At the time of this writing, four anni have passed since Commodore Hellefax was assigned governorship of Crucible and the 8th Outer Tract. It is reported that the terraforming efforts have made little headway; Crucible's atmosphere is only barely breathable and only cheatgrass and saltwort grow in sparse grasslands over the vast plains of ash. Crucible's population growth is anemic at best. It is little secret that Commodore Hellefax despises his current post. Given his history of questionable loyalty, it is strongly recommended that he be watched over closely. Even so, joyless execution of the Emperor's Will is preferable to seeing Crucible descend into banditry once again.
- Lu-Han Zeman, Imperial Chronicler and Mentat
Ruling Body: IA-appointed governor
Home Planet: Crucible
Primary Resource: Recycling alien building materials.
Armed Forces
(Leave this blank until the main IC thread is up with details about the technology available k thx.) mmkay
Imperial Assessment
In the course of the Most Stupendous Empire's inexorable expansion into the farthest reaches of the cosmos, Man has encountered numerous races of barbarous alien. Such was the case when colonists attempted to settle a system inhabited by an indigenous race 12 anni past. The name by which they called themselves was lost with their civilization, but Man knew them as the Aylma. When imperial colonists attempted to colonize planets settled by the Aylma, conflict arose as it so often does between Man and Xeno. The Aylma attempted to defend themselves from imperial incursion, but their's was a futile effort. Xeno resistance is always futile.
The Imperial Authority dispatched the 27th Tagma to the Aylma homeworld in response to Aylma resistance to colonization efforts. The battleships of the 27th, a Tagma trained for planetary assault, effortlessly subdued the pitiful defenses of the Aylma and sterilized their world from orbit. When the 27th left the system, the xeno homeworld was naught but a burnt cinder covered in ashes and ruins.
In the absence of the Aylma, the xeno world was occupied by criminal outcasts from the Empire. Living amidst the extensive xeno ruins, the lawless squatters were able to evade apprehension by the Imperial Authority. Piracy became rampant in the nearby 7th Outer Tract and it was clear that something needed to be done. The Imperial Authority dispatched forces to the planet once again; this time the 51st Tagma led by the disgraced Commodore Augustine Hellefax. The 51st captured the pirate strongholds and established Imperial control over the ruined world, which was summarily rechristened as Crucible. Commodore Hellefax was charged as governor of the newly-established 8th Outer Tract, responsible for rooting out all criminal enterprise and terraforming Crucible from a burnt cinder to a thriving colony.
At the time of this writing, four anni have passed since Commodore Hellefax was assigned governorship of Crucible and the 8th Outer Tract. It is reported that the terraforming efforts have made little headway; Crucible's atmosphere is only barely breathable and only cheatgrass and saltwort grow in sparse grasslands over the vast plains of ash. Crucible's population growth is anemic at best. It is little secret that Commodore Hellefax despises his current post. Given his history of questionable loyalty, it is strongly recommended that he be watched over closely. Even so, joyless execution of the Emperor's Will is preferable to seeing Crucible descend into banditry once again.
- Lu-Han Zeman, Imperial Chronicler and Mentat
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