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16 days ago
Current I just came out from watching The Last Act at my local cinema. It was something. It was really something.
24 days ago
BUILDING KICK! EXPLOSIOOOOOOOOON!
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4 mos ago
27 years old today. Only three years of my 20s left. Where did all that time go?
11 likes
4 mos ago
So apparently, if you use a tooth with a filling in it to chew toffee, the toffee can become sicky enough to pull the filling out.
3 likes
6 mos ago
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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Bio

*Insert adventurous back story of adventure here*

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"What does the Great SHOOGBIMBHALD see?" the high priest asks. "What wisdom do the stones reveal?"

SHOOGBIMBHALD heaved a great sigh as He rose to His feet, channeling His disappointment at discovering the treasure was in fact dangerous monster eggs into playing the part of a beleaguered teacher whose students just weren't quite grasping the lessons He was trying to teach. "Oh my zealous followers..." SHOOGBIMBHALD lamented. "Your faith in me is strong, but you all still have so so much to learn." He turned to face Blibdoolpoolp before continuing.

"Things are not always as they appear to be." SHOOGBIMBHALD explained. "When I first bade you to mine, I knew you would come upon this place. For this was no gift, you see. No... It was a test. A test to see the extent of my flock's wisdom. These stones? They are not stones at all. They are the eggs of a Gloom-Croaker. They are freshly laid now, so it is safe to approach. But when they hatch? They will become a tide of bludgeoning violence and piercing aggression. And that is to say nothing of the mother that will return to guard them when the time of hatching draws nigh... AnD sO EnDs tHe TeSt oF My fOlLoWeRs' WiSdOm." That last sentence reverberated with eldritch power as SHOOGBIMBHALD made a occult gesture of Prestidigitation with one hand. When the hand stopped moving, there was a miniature version of one of the eggs now sitting on His upturned palm. "When you first discovered this chamber and what lay within, you believed you had found treasure." He clenched the hand holding the egg into a fist. "But in truth... you had found danger." He opened His hand again, revealing that a miniature kuo-toa skull was sitting on His palm. "And you would have eagerly brought it into the cathedral had I not been here to stop you."

SHOOGBIMBHALD allowed the high priest a few moments to stew in this revelation, then dispelled the skull and spoke again. "Don't allow yourself or any other among the congregation to judge themselves too harshly though." He said. "For I am a forgiving god and I am a providing god." SHOOGBIMBHALD gestured down at the crab. "It is for such reasons that I ordained for this crab of great wisdom to be discovered today." He continued. "Did you see how it clicked its legs and then went completely still? In its wisdom, it sensed the danger here. And in its wisdom, it will sense the danger in other places as well. Ensure this crab is well fed and well cared for, and you will always be forewarned of danger when you mine in the future."
Can I roll Perception to see what Flurry is looking at? With advantage if Lady Agnes helps?


You can roll Perception, but not with advantage. You would have had disadvantage due to distance from what Flurry is fixated on and the crowded nature of the area, but Lady Agnes can negate that with the Help action.
"I actually enjoy social gatherings, just usually with far fewer people involved. This is... A bit much. But I'd do whatever I could to be here for Professor Finch today. She deserves that much. This is a special day for her."

Lady Agnes smiled and nodded in agreement with the sentiment. "She is fortunate indeed to have so loyal a protege as you." She said. "Even if I was not obligated to them, I'd gladly endure similar trials to be there for my patrons... Or rather... some of them, that is." Much like the Everhearts, the Larimars were spellcasters. But while your family were born with magic, Lady Agnes and her family bargained for theirs. It varied from Larimar to Larimar as to who or what it was they chose as their warlock patron. But if there was a being that could have magical powers haggled out of it, it was always a safe bet to say that a Larimar had done so at least once. The only exception to this rule was fiends, with whom the Larimars had a long history of mutual animosity.

For her part, Lady Agnes was sworn and beholden to the Meeting of Minds, a conclave of 9 powerful necromancers and an owl familiar who long ago partook of an arcane ritual to attain immortality by removing the brains from their bodies and placing them into jars. This arrangement was why Lady Agnes held more sympathy for your work on Flurry than most usually had. Especially when it became known that attempts to bring Flurry back through conventional means were met with failure due to the spellcasters brought in being unable to find the dog's soul.

"If you would not find having some company in all of this to be a bit much, might I accompany you for a time?" Lady Agnes asked. "It's been somewhat longer than usual since we last spoke, so I was hoping to see how you and Flurry have been doing... If you would simply prefer the company of yourselves though, I won't hold it against you."

As all of this went on, Flurry continued to stare off into the distance. Utterly transfixed by whatever had captured his attention.
SHOOGBIMBHALD fought valiantly to keep a straight face while bearing the ever increasing weight of anticipation on His shoulders as He walked through the halls of the cathedral. All the sights He usually paid attention to, the Elvish carvings, the illegible script, the jarring transition from dark elf stonework to kuo-toa stonework, even passing by the way leading to the cathedral's forbidden place; all of them blended together as He resisted the undignified urge to dance like a happy prospector.

"Not far now, Great One," the high priest croaks over his shoulder. "Just ahead. You will see. You will see what Your wisdom has brought us."

"Indeed." SHOOGBIMBHALD responded, only half listening as He pondered the pros and cons of adding some sort of ceremonial mask or other form of face concealment to His everyday wardrobe.

When they entered the chamber containing the stones, SHOOGBIMBHALD brought His hand to His chin in a gesture of deep thinking to disguise the fact that He was actually doing so to keep His jaw from dropping.

"Behold! The treasures You led us to! The gifts of the deep! The Mother of Pearl's blessing made real!"

At least a dozen flawless glowing crystal orbs the size of a kuo-toa's head sat across the room. They were beautiful. They were doubtlessly of great value. They were... They were... suspicious.

The false gesture became true as SHOOGBIMBHALD as He noticed the reactions of Nyphl and the crab, recalled how dangerous a place the Underdark could be, and recalled also how dangerous unidentified magical objects could be as well. His mind turned to matters of of the arcane, but quickly hit a roadblock that only pondering on either matters of the natural world or surviving within it would solve. And even then, it would require getting a closer look at the crystals.

"Are they not magnificent, Great SHOOGBIMBHALD?" Blibdoolpoolp asked. His bulging eyes gleaming with pride.

"They are indeed magnificent." SHOOGBIMBHALD spoke before the priest could ask his next question. "Magnificent enough that I would enjoy getting a closer look at them." Setting the crab down beside Him, SHOOGBIMBHALD moved to inspect the crystals. Making sure not to walk directly underneath any of the stalactites as he approached.

"Well I say, we're definitely gonna just follow ya this time."
Would an Arcana check of 22 yield any useful information about the magical glowing crystals?
As the kuo-toa began to caper about their god's throne in celebration of His latest show of power. SHOOGBIMBHALD reached down and opened a backpack that leaned against the side of His throne. From it, He drew a mess kit and beckoned for the rest of the food offerings to be placed into the mess kit's cooking pan. Once that was done, SHOOGBIMBHALD began to make a series of esoteric gestures over the food while chanting along with the congregation. Soon enough, the fish began to sizzle and steam, while the glowing mushrooms began to dry up and glow brighter.

As he cooked and flavored his food through the use of Prestidigitation, Leo sensed a pulse of concern through his telepathic link with Nyphl. Leo sent a pulse of reassurance back and gave the flumph a few more scritches behind the eyestalks.

When He deemed that the food was sufficiently cooked, SHOOGBIMBHALD waved his hand over his breakfast to cool it down to an edible temperature. With that done, the god began to dine.

Under His spell, what should have been raw, subterranean sea creature instead was perfectly seasoned, properly cooked fish with a taste that felt both familiar and luxuriously elevated. The first bite was tender and flaky, yielding with almost no resistance. The flesh was moist, carrying a gentle natural sweetness that belonged only to truly fresh fish. The salt drew that sweetness forward, sharpening it just enough to make every mouthful vivid and distinct. The spices bloomed across the palate. Not overpowering, but layered. Warm notes drifted in first, perhaps pepper or paprika, followed by subtler aromatics that rose with the steam. Each element enhanced rather than masked the fish’s own flavor.

Meanwhile, where once there was the tongue-numbing taste of mud, now there were dried, candied mushrooms held a strangely enchanting flavor. At first bite, there is a gentle snap, the exterior firm but yielding, like a piece of chewy fruit that has spent time in the sun. The sugar glaze hits immediately: bright, sweet, almost crystalline on the tongue. But beneath it lay the earthiness of the mushroom, now moderated just so as to add to the experience rather than take away from it. The sweetness didn’t erase that umami core, it wrapped around it. The result was a duet of flavors. Caramel warmth paired with a subtle, almost truffle-like depth.

Soon enough, both morsels were gone. "A fine appetizer." SHOOGBIMBHALD proclaimed. "And now... the main course." With a gesture, the boot was brought before Him. Rather than place the boot in the pan though, SHOOGBIMBHALD slipped his hand beneath the boot and lifted it up to his eye level. He inhaled deeply then, causing the boot to almost immediately begin steaming. The steam was promptly sucked into SHOOGBIMBHALD'S gaping maw as he continued to inhale. And as He inhaled more and more of the steam, the boot began to lose more and more of it's moisture and color. When He was done inhaling, what once was a soaking wet brown leather boot was now bone dry and grayscale. SHOOGBIMBHALD then beckoned the young kuo-toa that had found the boot to stand before Him, where the god conveyed what was left of the boot back to its finder with a nod of approval.

With that all done, SHOOGBIMBHALD reclined back into His throne and observed the worship of His followers until it finally came to an abrupt end. He then watched as the followers all filed out until the only one left was the high priest, who reverently approached and bowed his head in the way he always did when there was something to report. "Speak." SHOOGBIMBHALD commanded.

"Great SHOOGBIMBHALD, your faithful servants have news. Good news. The Mother of Pearl smiles upon us through You." The exited goggler reported. "We have been excavating. Exploring the cave systems that branch from Your sacred cathedral. Going deeper. Always deeper, as You have taught us. To find the treasures of the drowned places."

"And you have found them." SHOOGBIMBHALD stated rather than questioned.

"And we have found them, Great One. Stones. Brilliant stones. Each one as large as my head." The high priest confirmed. "They glow with inner light. They pulse with power. The chamber where they rest... it feels sacred. Holy. We knew immediately that this was Your doing."

SHOOGBIMBHALD nodded at that last sentence. On the outside, He looked like He had known this news was coming all along. But on the inside? Elation surged through the telepathic link Leo and Nyphl shared. When the kuo-toa had fist set up a mining operation in response to an off-handed comment he'd made, Leo had never imagined that it would be this successful. Magic stones as big as a kuo-toa's head? Such a treasure trove would undoubtedly make him richer than he'd ever been in his entire life!

"You led us there. You, in Your infinite wisdom. You wanted us to find these treasures. And now we offer them to You. We ask... we humbly beg... that You come see what Your servants have discovered in Your name. That You bless this sacred place with Your presence."

After permitting Leo a moment to fully collect himself, SHOOGBIMBHALD rose to His feet and stepped down from His throne, half distracted for a moment by the waving of the crab before looking to His high priest. "Rise." The god commanded. "Lead on."

Magic stones as big as a kuo-toa's head... Leo just had to see them!
It took the little girl a moment to fully understand that you weren't going to let her near Flurry. But by then, you were already casting your spell. The initial glow of the gems on your arcane glove were enough to take her attention off reacting to being told no in the way that small children usually do. And when the spell was cast and the illusory feline appeared before her, the girl had likely already forgotten about the initial refusal. "Kitty!" The girl exclaimed while bouncing up and down in excitement. When you bade the cat move off, the girl chased after it with a call of "Pet the kitty!" as she went. The other children that had come to observe you moved off after the girl and the cat. Soon enough, you were alone agai-

"And here I was thinking I was going to have to rescue you from a mob of curious children." A familiar voice spoke up.

The voice belonged to a half-elven woman around your age who carried herself with the effortless grace of someone raised among the nobility. Her complexion was smooth and fair, like porcelain warmed by a faint blush. Long, golden hair fell in gentle waves down her back. Her eyes were her most striking feature: bright orbs of soft violet, framed by dark lashes, that seemed to subtly shift in hue with her mood. A delicate nose and high cheekbones lent her an air of quiet elegance, while her lips curved easily into a warm, intelligent smile. She was slender but not frail, the lines of her figure perfectly poised, shaped as much by confidence as by nature. Her gown - embroidered silk tailored to perfection - flowed like water around her, the fabric whispering as she walked. Jewels glimmered at her throat and wrists, but even they seemed only pale reflections of the radiance she herself carried.

This was Lady Agnes Larimar, a daughter of the noble family allied with the Everhearts. Among all of the Larimars, she was the one that you interacted with the most often.

"Hello Viktor." Lady Agnes greeted you happily. "I do hope all this festive atmosphere hasn't been pressing down on you too much. I know such things have never really been your preference... Though I suppose that just makes it all the more heartwarming that you would brave it to be here for your mentor's big day."
@Guardian Angel Haruki

My brain stopped working during the last post and I forgot to address all of what Cascade did. Sorry about that, Haru. I managed to get around to everything in this latest post though.
"Matches, Gringam, don't let anyone accept those fleeces! Dose fleeces are from da pelts of angelic beasts. We had a pair of demons try to gift dose to us, so we would make a deal with them and swindle us if not this village! I don't want anyone ta get condemned, killed, tricked, or be led into any kine of trouble by dem!"

"Demons?!" Gringam gasped in horror. "First the Northmen approach, now demons are already here? Oh good gods."

"Maybe not demons." Matches commented. "If they offered gifts and deals, it is more likely they were devils. Demons would have attacked on sight."

"Does it matter whether they're demons or devils?" Gringam asked. "They're still trouble."

"Perhaps... but they're the kind of trouble that wouldn't want us dead just yet." Matches said. "After all, they can't convince us to sell our souls if the cold or the Northmen kill us all."

Meanwhile, Tolomeo looked at Flicker with a confused expression on his face. "They... aren't wares though? We didn't buy them from a merchant." The boy explained. "The letter said that they're a gift for all the cold people here."
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