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7 mos ago
Current @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3 likes
7 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6 likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3 likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.

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No longer an asshole!

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"See!? Big Red's holding back a bit, but its way harder for him to try and knock me down when I'm in a proper stance." The nomad girl was hoping the lesson would be obvious, but it seemed that their druidic friend would need more instruction than just showing. "You have a point. Learning the rights and wrongs of proper stances is better by doing it yourself. Here!" she said, handing over her stick to the girl before going to find another one.

"The staff you carry would be really good at blocking bladed weapons since its sturdy, but we can go over that another time. For now, take your stance and I'll hit your stick. I guess while we do this, Big Red can be our referee. He's way better at fighting than I am," she said, looking to their lizard companion. "That is if you don't mind, and all."

The girl seemed very enthusiastic about getting to teach a little bit. That and, it probably made more sense to not have the physically weakest member of the party start off sparring with the strongest one.
Turq Beaufort



The finest of days in Vacuo always began with sand, sun, some more sand, some more sun, and a good brawl. Naturally, this meet and greet was ideal for Turq Beaufort, who was quite ready for some "fun" in the sun. A smirk crossed the faunus's lips as he put his hands on his belt, the turqoise cylindrical object on it releasing a jagged blade on each side as it was pulled apart. "Turq Beaufort. Born and raised here in lovely Vacuo, and born to make shit suck less for everyone. And, nice pants," Turq would say, before starting to advance. As he had spoken with his weapon drawn he had gradually pulled the cylindrical handles apart, a chain connecting them that Turq lengthened until it was about seven feet in length, hands moving to grasp at just one handle and the chain. "Mindless is a bad way to put it. After all, a huntsman's used to dealing with Grimm rushing 'em. This is more like...four one-man armies," Turq said, hyping himself up as he spun his chain faster and faster.

With a dextrous motion, Turq's right hand shot to the spinning handle and caught it, another flick snapping it to the right at an angle. In that singular arc of motion the blade detached and launched itself, sailing in a wide arc off to the right of the group as it spun and spun, its trajectory aimed right at Auron. Breaking into a sprint with his right hand once again twirling the chain, Turq advanced with an appraising look in his eye. Their instructor was damn tough, but, right now, Turq felt on top of the world. Maybe if they beat the hell out of their instructor now, they'd get to skip past the certification and become Huntsmen right then and there. Seeing victory before he even saw the fight, Turq would maneuver around Veloce and throw his blunted handle directly into the sand before Auron. His intention was to blind their instructor to distract from the rapidly approaching Boomerang, drawn to the handle it had detached from.

Turq grinned as he withdrew his handle, readying himself to attack with the bladed pick while Veloce did his thing. If his plan worked, there would be too many things incoming for Auron to defend himself with his pipe, especially if the sand actually had gotten in his eyes. Actually depending on others for a team play while they had 0 time to get to know each other beyond name was kind of a dumb idea, since it wasn't like they had time to explain the mechanics of their weapons. Much as he hated having his spotlight stolen, Turq could deal with it while this "strongest" pack of lone wolves all raced towards the same target.

Why were they the strongest?

Well, obviously because Turq was in it. And if his boomerang sneak attack worked, that'd just prove once again that he's more than qualified to be a Huntsman. Oscuro was a stepping stone in comparison, whereas taking out a true Huntsman would solidify Turq (and company)'s positions as certified ass-kickers. Besides, with just a pipe, what could one guy do against four!?

Much as Turq liked a good self-introduction, a challenge was being made, and by shade he was going to throw down. Of course this also meant that it'd bruise his ego pretty badly when they all got trumped but hey, it builds character.
Levia would pout, hiding her face under her hat. She wanted to be thanked for her speedy arrival...but instead, Tungsten had stolen the show by being, well useful. But even if she was upset at not being a big hero, she was glad that her master was alive and well. Kneeling once the question of how everyone had been affected, Levia would recall the extensive damage her facility had received. It was already fairly small, so it wasn't like it had a massive amount to break, but still...any breaking had to be approved by a form filed in triplicate! "At my best estimate, my facility has lost about 90% of its Slimes, with my total numbers now only at about...four. Two Reslimeclers, one Inslimerator, and one Neutraslimer, Levia said, spouting off the nonsensical names her three slime jobs had without shame or hesitation.

"If its a priority I can try and get more breeding to supply materials, but since everything we need to move is mostly like...rocks...I imagine that's low priority. If my lady permits it, I'd like to help clear the rubble and get the other facilities up and running. Until hazardous materials become apparent, I can function as on-site assistance for rubble clearing and excavation.

After realizing that she had prior given Faetalis an order, and violated Gammaton's personal space, the dragoness bowed her head completely, feeling absolutely stupid for making so many blunders in one day. Admittedly Gammaton moved at the speed of a larva inside a dead guy, but still, it was rude of her to scoop him up like that...
Any kind of plan to placate the raging senior citizen faded once she started raging at Brandy. Like, wow. She was angry. Extremely so. When asked what they did, Alice was confused until she started hearing that it seemed that everyone, every single person in town had laid the blame upon them. Those damnable gossiping ladies that she'd done their laundry for and hung up, good as new...she'd think that they'd at least say it was the DOG that got the stuff dirty, and not mention the two girls trying to wrangle the thing without a-

That's right. Elmwood insisted that he needed no leash or harness.

"Ma'am, when we took the job to walk your dog, we were specifically told he needed no leash nor harness, but a literal MINUTE after we left your doorstep, Francoise started running amock."

"Don't go blaming my dog when you two can't even-

Alice continued unabated, suddenly seeming larger. "Your dog played in mud, scarfed down meat, and bathed in a river and seemed happy to do all of it," she said, while Francoise tried to snobbishly turn its head away in disgust, tail wagging at all the fun times he'd just had.

"Your job was to watch him! Not-"

"Ma'am. Our job was to walk a dog of unknown breed and not get it dirty. But when we aren't even given the tools to walk a dog, how is it our responsibility when he runs away, without anything stopping him but thoughts and prayers, that he behaves like a dog!?"

Alarmingly enough, Alice was gaining ground in the argument and Elmwood hated it.

"Francoise is a championship breed-"

"There are no dog shows held within 500 miles of this village. And for a championship breed, he sure enjoys being a normal dog. Right Francoise?" she asked, turning around and petting the dog who, unconsciously, yipped and wagged its tail before sinking its head, locking eyes with Elmwood.

Alice was good at arguing. As all retail workers who are so jaded that they leave it behind forever become. After she realized that Elmwood was just an elderly lady that didn't know her own dog, that was nothing compared to the werewolves that Alice was accustomed to.

"I'm fine if you don't want to pay us the rest of the contract fee, ma'am, but in the future...buy a leash or a harness." Right now, Alice looked large and in charge, chest puffed out as she stood her ground on the issue. She knew they weren't getting paid. Now it was just a principle matter.
Steppe Archer would examine the druid girl's stance and softly grasped her knees and feet, moving them into a proper position. "If you had a stance like the one before, a light breeze could knock you down. Like this, say, if a spear was coming at you and you had a shield up, you'd just get knocked down, and then they could stab your neck. Or worse, they could stab your legs and send you rolling, and you wouldn't be balanced enough to defend them," the nomad girl said, tapping various parts of Druid girl's body to show how super dead she'd be in a martial fight.

"Its one of those things that're hard to know if someone doesn't teach you is the thing. So, how about this? Me and Big Red will spar with some sticks, and you can see how we position and move. That sound good?" she asked, and, before even getting an answer, would find a sturdy, long stick, toss it to the Lizardfolk fighter, and then grab her own. "Even if Big Red is way bigger than me, as long as I have a proper stance, he shouldn't be able to knock me down without a fight. If you would, Mr. Red?" the girl said, holding her stick aloft to block a strike, urging for Red to demonstrate that the girl wouldn't be totally floored from one attack. Which, judging from her stance, she might have a chance at. Even if archery was her forte, it didn't mean that she was weak physically. If anything, her arms were impressive for her small stature, betraying countless hours spent shooting targets, and her stance showed she'd clearly practiced a little with her sword.

Of course, Red could always just teach her a lesson in shaping up her melee skills by beating her up. But that'd be rude.
Steppe Archer would cross her arms and nod at the Lizard Fighter's idea of training in things they weren't very good at. It made sense, though, honestly she wasn't sure what she'd want to improve on. Maybe getting better in close range was an option, but she wouldn't describe herself as "weak" in that department.

The moment that the druid girl started balancing on one foot, the archer couldn't help but snicker, mostly since she was wobbling like a newborn deer. "I don't know if that kind of training is gonna do it for balance. But if you wanna work on what we're weak at, we could all start off with simple physical training. I imagine Big Red doesn't need much of that himself, but it might help us think." The archer herself wasn't really sure what weaknesses she should learn to cover. Maybe she could try and work on shooting while moving around, but that was...kind of hard. Like, extremely. On horseback she could rely on the horse going and maneuvering mostly on its own, but it'd be easy for someone running around and shooting arrows to trip and stumble and probably poke an eye out.

"Or, we could just spar with some sticks. That always works too."

Levia would bite her lip as her and Gammaton walked side-by-side, answering her companion's question quickly with: "Its lady Faetalis! She was injured and I didn't have any skills to help her, so I went to get you ASAP, since you have those cleric spells and all." She wasn't even aware of whether Gammaton had access to their cleric skills in this stage of life, and, if need be, knew that it was her solemn duty to offer her life to Gammaton if need be. Though, a blood transfusion might be difficult since her blood was poisonous...

Anyways, Gammaton's jaunt wasn't quite up to the speed that a medical emergency required, and as such the queen of punching took it upon herself to gently pick Gammaton's host body up, saying: "Sorry, just, faster if I carry you," she said, having embarrassingly enough the highest agility of any factory manager, save for Gammaton's fullest power. With her legs and extra set of arms, the way forward would be simple, as they kind of just needed to follow the trail of rocks smashed to pieces or melted by the dragoness.

Upon stepping near the ruined building, Levia would gingerly place Gammaton back upon his feet, panicking the entire time as the metal skeletons asked their questions. She then dragged Gammaton inside and, hearing the healing song of Tungsten and seeing him cradle their leader, the dragoness couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy. But that didn't matter right now. The guild leader was top priority, and as such she would approach Tungsten Jazz. "I'm glad you were able to get here fast. I brought Gammaton too," she said, looking around as the other factory overseers became audible. Mae and Cormac weren't exactly small enough or quiet enough to not be noticed.

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