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7 mos ago
Current @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3 likes
7 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6 likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3 likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.

Bio

No longer an asshole!

Most Recent Posts

Eula



...Well, diplomacy had failed. Time to resort to the "significantly less violent than lethal" method.

Seeing as they weren't allowing her to inspect their food supply, Eula had a feeling that they were definitely hiding something. It was a minor request, one which could easily be fulfilled if one had nothing to hide. As such, the sound of Eula's knuckles clenching would be audible while she looked at the bandits around her.

But, seeing as she was of moderate intelligence and these bandits...were not, she thought to at least try one last tactic before things went south. She had no doubt that she could beat them in a fight but...doing so now would only confirm their suspicions about Yokai in general. "Actually, that's only superstition. Perhaps there are tales of some yokai devouring souls in your land, but ever since the latest Demon Lord took power, monsterfolk around the world have become more docile. For example, back during the old days, a succubus could indeed suck a man's soul out during the...'good time' you mentioned. But now, they only siphon a modicum of energy out. Allow me to present a diagram," Eula said before smashing a rock into pieces, picking up a jagged piece, and beginning to etch it into the bark.

As if she wasn't surrounded by bandits, she would calmly sketch out a diagram of how magical energy transfer worked for monsters, which...might be the steamiest thing that the bandits had seen in some time. "While it is common in some uncivilized areas for Mamono or Yokai to interact with humanity in this way, you can rest assured that the members of the task force are in control of their instincts. I myself, as an automaton, can go off of nothing but electrical charge for months at a time. Also, I would not force anyone to be my partner. ...Also, I apologize if this disappoints but..." the automaton would consider her words carefully for a moment, before slowly raising an index finger up.

"None of you are my type. However, I wouldn't be against simply being 'friends'."
With a bountiful night's rest, Alice would yawn and stretch against Brandy's bosom, unaware of where she was while the pounding headache induced by her hangover throbbed inside her brain. "Mm..." she said, ears drooping while she slowly pieced the reality of the room around her together. She was half naked, sleeping with Brandy who was lacking a bra...and she'd passed out drunk last night.

Alice would sit on the floor and think while getting her alchemical oven out, brewing herself some coffee since...really, who was going to pay an inn for garbage coffee? The hard-working folk of Gromril had a saying: "If the coffee sucks, break the cup." As such, Alice was accustomed to splurging just the tiniest bit on the beans for her coffee, the aroma of rich coffee being ground up in her mortar and pestle starting to fill the room before she started brewing. If Brandy wasn't awake already, she'd likely find that a mug of fresh hot coffee was waiting on the nearby nightstand, while Alice sipped her's in quiet bliss.

Meanwhile, Sofia would be fully dressed and up already. Wine went through her quick, and being undead, it wasn't like more poison could rot her brain any further. Seeing as her two companions had spent the night getting rather drunk (mostly Alice), she would be bringing them a tray of water and bread, to ease the hangovers they might be having.

"Alice, Brandy, I brought something for your headach-" Sofia said, before cracking the door and seeing the rather easy to misinterpret sight of Alice leaning against the table, shirt slightly open, and sipping on coffee while Brandy drank her's in bed. ...Did they...were they...?

Sofia would slowly close the door and turn around, pale cheeks flushed with color as she struggled to maintain her pure image of Alice as a smart, dependable adventurer. ...Was...she secretly a play-wolf!?

"Coffee~" Alice said while barely paying attention, hearing the door shut, unaware that Sofia's opinion of her had dropped from "Charismatic and smart leader" to: "Apex Predator when drunk."
Eula



This was growing a touch complicated. The bandits were insisting that they'd stolen all of their supplies from the Varjans. And at that, that they'd only taken from the Varjans a week ago, rather than the immediate threat proposed by Honoka. In truth, there wasn't enough information present to ascertain a certain answer. ...Right now, she really wished that someone more acquainted with human behavior was around. "Hm. While I don't believe that you're lying to me, I'll have to check your supplies to make sure," the automaton said, holding her hands up to show that she meant no harm. "In addition, can you inform me if any other groups may have stolen from civilians in the area?"

There wasn't anything that she could do if it was an entirely separate group of bandits but...it should be rather easy to identify Varjan rations, even if they had been stolen from villagers. "Given your knowledge of the Varjan camps nearby enough to steal supplies, have you considered enlisting with the local army regiment? You could serve as scouts, and secure your homeland from the invaders it faces," Eula suggested, trying to find a clean way to get the bandits and Honoka what they wanted. The wilds would be safer with fewer criminals, and the bandits would have a chance to earn food and safety in an organization.

"Times are rapidly changing. Yokai as well as humans need to work together to repel the Varjans." ...The longer this conversation drew on, Eula found her resolve faltering. The lies told by the village woman Saki had tainted her perception of human honesty and now...she was ill-inclined to believe either side at face value.
I'm very sorry that its taken me so long. Its been a rough couple of weeks for me, but even that isn't a sufficient excuse for how long I've taken.
"I don't get it though...why would the farmers be involved in stealing the food?" Fio asked, tilting her head and perching her...well, she didn't have a "chin", but if she had one a leaf would be poised upon it. "And the son of the owner especially shouldn't need to...maybe...there's some kind of sickness that's making everyone really really hungry?"

As if responding to Ting's worries, Fio was indeed getting a bit "droopy", slouching a bit and having the leaves of her head seeming to curl in a bit, as if recognizing there was no sun, so there was no point to staying awake. But...then she had an idea! "Ooh! I have an idea! I can sleep and be helpful!" the fomantis said, before walking out to a little patch of grass that wasn't being used for farming. "Ingrain!" she said, before digging her feet in and suddenly poofing into the ground, only her head above the dirt as she let out a tiny "humph!" of satisfaction. "Now, I look like a really big Magost Berry!"

...In spite of the..."comedy" of the action, it might actually be a half-decent idea. Fio could literally blend in with the unripe berries and crops, being able to restore some of her energy with Ingrain while keeping an eye out.
Hector Wyland



[@Croc Crush]

Well. Scarlett was already proving Hector's worries were founded, what with her not being willing to share information, and then snarling like a wild beast when shielded by Tilnak's spell. Shavis had more experience in dealing with her, so Hector would resist the first instinct he had: Smacking her in the back of the head with the butt of his rifle to knock her out. A gentler touch was definitely in order for one so prone to fits of...whatever this was. He was certain that further agitation would sour any chance of them working together without a knife suddenly appearing in someone's back.

When her little spasming fit of throwing up blood and darkness was finished, Hector would be glad to have a chance to sit down while they rode to the hamlet. Thankfully, Scarlett was sleeping and wouldn't cause another outburst. Dutifully disassembling, checking, and cleaning the parts of his rifle, Hector was relatively quiet the entire ride. It wasn't out of any particular lack of interest in the others, it was more...rude, in his mind, to chatter away while someone who was minutes ago throwing up blood tried to rest. Even if he didn't particularly care for Scarlett's behavior, his good breeding and manners shone through, even if she was a little above a beast in terms of-

When Scarlett lurched forward and puked as the carriage came to a stop, Hector's shoes were right in the line of fire as vomit surged forward. The already palid tone of his face got a touch paler, a ghostly white as he thought about how much his shoes cost. Ruined. By puke. These were fine custom leather boots from Flugell's finest cobbler, designed for both fashion and form...and now they had the faintest tinge of off-black on the top of them. While everyone piled out of the carriage, Hector was absolutely stunned as he realized that he'd have to wear these shoes for quite some time. Getting out with a huge slump to his form, Hector felt like throwing up himself.

...He'd never forgive Scarlett for this transgression on male fashion.

He'd be so out of it that Herne would eventually start constricting his neck and shoulders to straighten him up, at least presenting him as if he were paying attention for the aged hamlet's leader. He'd really start paying attention though once his name was called by Scarlett, her manner of items laid out for them to take what was directed for them. It was an impressive division of duties and supplies, even if Hector was baffled that Scarlett was suddenly not only competent, but excelling in a leadership role. "Right," Hector said, taking the represent and putting it into his coat pocket. He had no idea just how long it would last, but he figured it was best to take it only when danger was present. With Scarlett now taking off to go "fish", Hector was left with the responsibility of, possibly, teaching some of the villagers a bit about marksmanship.

"Before we start dividing up duties and helping the villagers, I'd like to set up one of my summons near the perimeter," he said, which was an absolute lie. Rather, while Scarlett was still within viewing distance, he would release a hushed whisper before a thin, wisp-like object gently attached to Scarlett's right shoulder. It vaguely resembled a transparent ball of fluid that flickered like a flame, a pale white glow to it. Scarlett would sense there was no hostility to the spirit or its actions, likely serving to simply "know where she is" if the thin and flimsy nature of it was any indicator. "Now then," Hector said, back inside with the others. "I'm for Scarlett's plan and division of labor. It solidly divides us to where our strengths are best suited."
Eula



Thankfully, negotiations weren't completely out the window from the start. Eula had expected them to rebuke her claim of banditry. "I see. You would have a valid point, if I hadn't overheard two of your companions already. One mentioned Satoru spying on an elder and child, and the prospects of stealing from them," Eula said, before pointing at the two bandits she'd overheard. If she had an audio playback function, she could really frighten them by outright speaking their own words back to them. But, she'd have no idea who Satoru was without having overheard someone speak.

"Plus, I was sent here due to you stealing from another person. It is only from their wish that you not be harmed that I haven't attacked and simply taken what was stolen," Eula said, before her stony expression softened a touch. "...Please, respect that person's kindness. I do not intend to take everything that you have stolen. While I know that I should bring you all to face judgement, the economic and social circumstances make your actions...understandable," the automaton said, remembering another flash of her missing memory.

"Hm? Eliminate them? But...I mean, if we were hungry, we'd be stealing too, right? We're automatons, so we can go a lot longer and just live off of lightning. You're too serious sometimes, Eula."

"...But, if you do wish to continue plundering, I would insist that you do not target this island's people. There are invaders that have ruined your's and many other's lives. The Varjans are a threat to everyone, bandit, civilian, yokai, human...it doesn't matter." Starting to walk towards the center of the camp, Eula would add: "In the end, if the Varjans win, your hunger will be whetted with steel, instead of understanding."
Sofia was baffled that somehow Brandy was under the impression that Alice was always a party girl, immediately changing her impression of Alice from "Accomplished alchemic genius" to "reckless party girl". Also, Sofia was more of a wine drinker but wouldn't object to the mead. "T-Thanks," she said before sipping it gingerly.

With Alice's binge drinking satiated and their entire tavern trip somehow paid by the coin of others thanks to her winnings, the trio was now free to go to the inn. And by "they were free to," what actually happened was Sofia having to walk them back since Alice was sloshed and Brandy was...Brandy. Sofia was only the slightest bit inebriated, having called it after a second glass of wine that had come after the mead. Alice however was very handsy, keeping an attempt going to try and hug Brandy that kept having a hand accidentally slip and grab her bosom. "Branddyyyyy...did I win...?" she slurred, tail lazily swishing to and fro before she hiccuped, doubled over by a drain, and promptly puked up a RAINBOW! After which she got back up straight and wiped her mouth with a handkerchief.

Sofia was...understandably rather disgusted, but was very happy to hear Brandy's words. "You've been a stalwart and invaluable companion Brandy. So, don't think that you're a burden. You're headstrong and somewhat misguided at times but...you're very brave as well. Now then, let's get Alice into bed before she paints the street." With some map knowledge from Sofia after her heartfelt praise, the three would find the inn rather easily. Run by a rather kindly looking old dwarf and his wife, they were kind enough to give Alice some water and help her up the stairs, seeing as the werewolf was inches from tumbling down the stairs every step.

Once the two rooms were rented, Sofia would have to leave Alice in Brandy's care since the werewolf insisted: "Brandy said fondles and gropies later..." Which, to the werewolf, had somehow become: Pass out on Brandy's bosom because it made a fantastic pillow.

...It also saved 8 copper pieces, and that was a good cost to cut.
Throwing in some tentative interest.
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