The Mad Hatter

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

I'm double posting because you guys are slow as hell and the privilege comes with Co-GMship.

@Bishop@MMGiru@Hillan@Raijinslayer@Ciphra@alexfangtalon
So... Since everyone (including me) is slow as hell at making Character Sheets, Halvtand and I have decided to make a deadline for character creation. You have until next Sunday to finish typing your sheets and post the finished results. Any alterations that Halvtand or myself may request does not need to be done before Sunday, unless you have already gotten your review and the corrections are already being made.

The deadline is:

Sunday the 17th of April, 2016

Good luck

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

So, I just wanted to let you guys know that I've been exceptionally busy this past week. So much, in fact, that I haven't actually had time to dicuss shit stuff with our glorious leader (aka Halvtand). It seems that things will look up a bit next week, but I can't make any promises. So, for the next long period, it's probably best to assume that I only have time to do anything on the weekends and that any attempt to communicate with my during the week will likely be noticed, but not responded to unless it is really, really important and/or urgent.

*whew*

So, with that little tidbit of information out of the way, I'll move on to the next point on my list.

@Raijinslayer
I'd like to remind you that Kenjutsu (Sword Arts) are technically a type of Taijutsu (Close-Quarter Combat), so lowering your Taijutsu level too much would make your Kenjutsu skill being high rather unrealistic, since such skills as dexterity, agility, strength (using gamer terms) and so on would be under Taijutsu proficiency, as well. Just a reminder and all that.

About her giving birth somewhere that's not Gobi... How far into her pregnancy was she, when she was banished? Because "the moment it became clear she was pregnant" can mean various things; by pregnancy test (I have no idea if they have those in the Narutoverse), by some sort of ninja ultrasound-scanning-type-thing (again, I don't know if they have those), when she began showing, when she couldn't hide her baby-belly anymore, when the baby began kicking and so on - all of those things would be at different stages of her pregnancy, after all, and would mean she had more or less time to travel around.
If we go with the "when she began showing" option, that would be when she was around 3-4 months pregnant, which would leave her 4-5 months to travel around the world and find the place she wanted to stay.
How many places did she go before she settled on Gobi? How long did she stay in each place? Where did she actually give birth? Who assisted her with the birth (doctors, midwife, medicine man/witch doctor, traveling medical ninjas)? How long did they stay there after the birth? Why did they not just settle there, rather than travel with an infant? How did she travel with the baby (on foot and carrying him, on a wagon or the like, ect.)? Basically, tell me/us about the travels and the birth.

Even though I like the idea of using engravings on weapons as seals and all that (reminds me of rune magic, which is awesome), I'd like to place attention on the fact that it's not something we've ever seen used in the series and is not in any way described as the way the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist's blades were made (since you mention that his father's clan were rumored to make those). You would need to go in depth about how this works.
I don't see this sort of engraving as Fuuinjutsu, since the only types of Fuuinjutsu that we've seen (as far as I can remember) are meant to either capture, restrict, protect or absorb things; they're all "defensive". They are, after all, sealing techniques; techniques used to seal things inside something.
If I have misunderstood how it is you plan to use these seals, please let me know and elaborate.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Raijinslayer

Feedback

All right, so Halvtand and I have discussed your character and because he's busy with stuff, you get my unsophisticated and primitive response rather than his finely worded stuff.

We would like to know what the point of him actually being born outside of Gobi is? You wrote it yourself, that he might as well have been born there … So why isn't/wasn't he?

What is the point of the “possible KG” you've got going here? What are your plans with this?

How was he so inherently good at blacksmithing that he could surpass his master by the time he was 15? How is one inherently good at anything, really, without the social/cultural aspect of it (as he did not grow up with his father, from whom he inherited this skill)?

How is one “slender and lean" but at the same time have "quite a bit of muscle in his upper body"? Is this just a wording mistake? Also, his height/weight ratio doesn't really seem to fit with the amount and type of muscle he would have build up by doing his blacksmithing. He should be heavier.

I wasn't aware that the amount of chakra a child possesses had something to do with how much their ancestors used theirs ...? Or was this not what you meant by:
“Has rather large chakra reserves, courtesy of his mother's ninja blood and his father's side being intensive chakra users as well, even if it's not for combat”
If I misunderstood what you meant, please explain and/or elaborate.

Now, without knowing what kind of jutsu you want your character to have, I must say that this list I will now make does set off sirens in my head:
“Above average Ninjutsu” - Better than your average chuunin.
“Genjutsu rather difficult for him” - He finds the most difficult type of jutsu difficult.
“Decent Taijutsu” - Which would be around average.
“Rather skilled at Kenjutsu” - His main focus of combat
“Knows some Fuuinjutsu” - That makes a total of 5 different types of jutsu.

Add to that:
A possible KG (making it 6 types)
Rather large chakra reserves
Inherited forging/blacksmithing abilities; so much that he is the best in the village

So... Do you see where my (our) concern lies?

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Hillan
Well, you better get used to doing things differently

Both Halvtand and I've been in a lot of Naruto RPs and we strive to make every one of ours an experience to remember ;)

Actually, I started PbP/Forum RPing when I was 12, which is actually (curiously enough) 12 years ago. I joined a total of three RPs before I GMed my own, which was my very first Naruto RP and the birth of another character of mine that I still use more or less every chance I get; (Hagane) Haruka.

Since then, I've been in more RPs than I'd every even want to count, made about half as many characters (I believe in recycling) and about a quarter of the RPs were Naruto.
So I know what it's like to be a vet. xD

Of course, since I started RPing, I've done a lot with my life, so even the old characters I have from back then has grown with me and if I put the old sheet up next to a new one, the only things that would stay the same are the name and appearance (and perhaps a few details about his/her background that would have stayed with me from a previous RP).
One of the (to me) interesting details of a "past life" that Haruka has lived, which has stuck with her, is the fact that her Genin team is actually the team she had in the original RP I made her for. I usually play her as a Chuunin/Tokubetsu Jounin (Special Jounin) now, so I had to "make up" a team for her to have had before she became one. One of the characters that were her teammatess in the original game actually died In-Game and the other actually did end up quitting being a ninja, so they just fit perfectly for her now having a team anymore. 12 years later, none of their players RP anymore, but their characters live on through Haruka.

...
I rant.
A lot.
My sincerest apologies.
The (one) Mad (as a) Hatter.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Hillan
Yeah. I guess we should have been more clear on that. Excpet you were the only one who didn't get it I only tease because you're Swedish and I do so with good intentions.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Hillan
It's right there in the Character Sheet. You even already used it for your Custom Technique. You could just look at all the other sheets and see that every technique is fitted to that format there ;)
So, you just need to fit your other techniques to that format. You may still leave the title as a link to the Wiki, to help yourself and others further out with finding out about the techniques.

@Raijinslayer
I think we still have room, but I'm not sure if Halvtand wanted it closed. Until he says otherwise, assume that we still have room and keep working on your sheet.
I can't judge your sheet alone; Halvtand and I do that together in our Skype Conversation of Doom, so you'll have to wait till he gets time and bothers to reply to me before you can get a full review. But, I can give you a few pointers; you may wanna give it a spell- and grammar check. There's a bit to much there/their/they're confusion in there for my comfort and a lot of (what I must assume is) typing mistakes.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Hillan
Well... I can't really see anything wrong with him, then. Please adjust your Techniques/Jutsu so that they fit our format so I can accept him and you can go ahead and move him to the Character tab

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Halvtand
You're good. Go ahead and move him to the Character Tab.

@Hillan
The only thing I can tell that you've changed, is the fact that your character now has a girlfriend ..?
It might just be me missing things, so please do tell me what else you changed.

Also, the chances of bandits coming anywhere near even the outskirts of Gobi seems very implausible. They would have had to either take the tunnel or climb the cliffs and valleys that make up the "wall" around the village. Since no one really knows that the village is even there, they would have no reason to go through the trouble of climbing cliffs and/or valleys and if they would have taken the tunnel, they would have "come out" in the middle of the village and would have had to get past the "guard" at the "gate", who would likely have alerted the entire village.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

@Hillan
I'll have a look at it when I review Halvtand's sheet in an hour or so.

Naruto: Ninjas of the end.

All right. The weekend is back and I have time to do shit again. Expect my sheet finished by this time tomorrow ('cause I'm being a lazy bum tonight).

@Halvtand
I will look at your sheet when I feel like it. It's likely be sometime tonight or early morning tomorrow.