
She couldn't breathe.
No, wait -- she could, she could. It just hurt. A lot. So much that her body was trying not to breathe without her mind consciously making the decision.
Ow. It was on the right, somewhere. Lower rather than higher. Did she have a broken rib? Wow. First broken bone. Exciting.
And suddenly she wanted to start bawling because no one knew.
First bone breaks were supposed to be for wild childhood shenanigans where your parents freaked out and rushed you to the hospital then got annoyed at you for sticking stuff down in your cast later. They were for college roadtrips with your best friends when things got a little too rowdy and you and the gang got to go spend your Thursday night in an ER together.
Right? Right? That was what it was like in the movies.
This wasn't the movies. Alaine blinked the blood out of her right eye again. No, this was some whacked-out carnival with a bazillion clowns, and she... what was she doing?
She shifted a little and was immediately greeted with full-body pain, plus the discomfort of smashed wood under her palms. Ah, right. She was out of juice. She'd dived out of the air and tackled Gaggles off Madcap and now... Her ears were ringing, but she was pretty sure she could hear Lightning Girl shouting.
Bad shouting or good shouting? ...Sounded like communicating. Not screaming. Okay. That was good.
Alaine tried to push herself up again and managed it that time, though one of her hands slipped a little where she was trying to brace against what probably used to be the counter of the stand she'd barreled into. When she glanced at her hand, she saw the sanguine smear her gloved fingers had left and felt her stomach drop.
It had happened again. She'd done it again.
Bile rose in the back of her throat and she struggled to hold her guts down, even as everything started assaulting her senses all at once. The pain, the residual vertigo, the nausea, the voices, the memories, the panic.
No no no no, she hadn't wanted to do it again. It was like speedrunning the five stages of grief.
Denial. She couldn't have done that again -- it wasn't the same. It wasn't the same. She'd had to.
Anger. Why? Why couldn't she have just kept her good streak going, why did those stupid clowns have to make her do that?!
Bargaining. Maybe it wasn't so bad -- they had been bad guys, real bad guys, and they'd been trying to kill everyone. Her, LG, civilians, everyone. Maybe it was something she could live with.
Depression. Except it wasn't. It wasn't something she could live with. It was going to be like the month after the first time. She wasn't going to be able to sleep or eat or think straight, and she was going to be in so much pain because she deserved it and it was going to hurt and she'd have to writhe in the dark of her apartment alone.
Alaine felt herself starting to hyperventilate despite the extreme discomfort in her ribs.
Acceptance. She'd done what she'd done. It was over. She couldn't take it back. She couldn't stop what was coming.
Her hands were shaking. Everything was shaking. She was breathing too much and not enough at the same time, her head spinning, screaming in the back of her mind -- whether it was her or the stars she didn't know, and she was losing the ability to think long enough to figure it out.
Not now, she begged herself silently, still outwardly trying to get up despite the overwhelming dismay building in her chest. Now now not now not now please this is such bad timing--
She heard more than saw Hat Trick's approach, and she managed to drag her head up while still on her hands and knees. Focus. Focus on something, anything...
Counting heads. Like she had for years growing up, walking at the back of the group. Brook, Grace, Ezra, Elijah, Joy, Mom, Dad. This time she was counting teammates -- Lightning Girl, Asteroid, Hat Trick... Ah. Well that wasn't comforting. That was only half the team.
An especially deep, panicked breath had pain lacing through her lungs and Alaine winced, stuck on her hands and knees amid the rubble for a moment more as she fought two battles at once.
“Why did the clown stop making jokes?”
Fuzzy vision focused in on the speaker. Gaggles? Gaggles... and Madcap. She focused on the later briefly, adding that to her team headcount. Good, he wasn't dead. At least her dive had maybe helped him out, rather than just made the evil clown king disappear.
Alaine gritted her teeth, pushing off her hands and sitting back on her knees. A small movement, but her entire body seemed to disapprove. Strongly.
“He lost his head.”
Blinking thickly, she frowned over at Gaggles and Madcap, the latter of the two holding the former around the throat. Deathgrip. She knew what was happening even before the manic laughing -- Lightning Girl's call to cuff the clown wasn't going to be followed.
The sharp snap and sudden silence brought no visible reaction from Blackstar, who just sat there on her knees, struggling to find a way to breathe that didn't hurt. In the back of her mind, there was some part of her that still wanted to be mortified. In the front of her mind, there was a much fresher part of her that thought Madcap should've torn Gaggles head clean off.
Like she could've done.
Oh God, there was the nausea again. She tilted her head up and back, something in her neck protesting the movement -- but it helped a little with the sickening feeling.
She could feel, in her core, the carnival dropping -- but not as fast as it should've. She didn't bother trying to puzzle through why.
Madcap was looking at all of them, hands spread like he was waiting for some kind of decree. She didn't have one to give.
Blackstar bit the inside of her cheek, hard, and forced herself to her feet. Another headcount. Lightning Girl, Hat Trick, Asteroid... Madcap. No Eclipse, anywhere. He was probably tied up somewhere else. Yeah. Just tied up.
She shook her head, feeling like her brains were mush in her skull. Back to business. She could be miserable later. A lifetime of putting everything and everyone else first meant she was well-versed in biting back her own discomforts to make sure what needed to be done got done.
She could be miserable later.

Post-Carnival
ᴄᴏʟʟᴀʙ ᴡɪᴛʜ @SonnetNSunbeam
It was easy enough to dodge going to see Alan back at headquarters. If anybody asked, Blackstar was quick to chirp that she had a healing factor. "It'll be kicking in any minute here, I'll be fine! Focus on the others, I'm good."
She hated lying. She never used to lie, ever, and now it felt like every other word out of her mouth was some tall tale or another.
Yeah, she had a little kick to her body's natural healing ability, but it just took off the edge of the healing process. Broken ribs generally took 6-12 weeks, so she'd be better in 4-8. She probably should've let Alan of Plymouth slap some morphine spell on her or something, but...
Looking at herself in the bathroom mirror, mask still on, still covered in grime and blood, she knew why she didn't.
She deserved the pain.
It was supposed to hurt, after what she'd done.
Alaine started to tug her mask down, ignoring the searing pain around that right eye. But as she saw her face starting to emerge in the mirror she felt an overwhelming sense of apprehension and turned abruptly, putting her back to the counter as she finished pulling the mask down, letting it hang around her neck. A glimpse at the inside revealed a good bit of blood around her right eye lens, and she huffed softly to herself.
She was still in public, despite the bathroom being safely empty for the moment, so her guard was still up. There was still more hurt on the way. It'd hit when she was at the apartment probably, alone, out of the public, free to crash and burn.
She wasn't looking forward to it. It was going to hurt. It was really, really going to hurt. The panic started rising again, tangible in the back of her throat. But she deserved it. Breathing quickened, lungs burned. Her eyes were starting to sting again.
Alaine tugged off her gloves before looking at the red-stained fingers made her start fighting nausea. Her hands were bloodied underneath, but that was her own blood, from split knuckles. That was fine. Grabbing the backpack she'd brought in from the locker room she moved for one of the stalls, starting the laborious process of stripping out of her uniform. Normally she wouldn't have bothered until she got back to the apartment, but she wasn't going to be able to fly to her window and slip in that afternoon. She didn't have enough energy. It'd have to be walking.
Which was going to hurt.
Stripped out of the uniform, she changed into the civilian clothes she'd brought in the backpack, just in case she'd needed them -- dark jeans, black t-shirt, black hoodie. All of it went right on over the blood and gore and open wounds, no effort made to bandage herself up yet. She didn't have enough first aid supplies in the backpack for that, and she wasn't about to let anyone at SDN know her "healing factor" wasn't already in full swing.
Slipping out of the bathroom in her new, almost full-coverage civilian look, Alaine first made sure no one was around to see her bare face before making for her locker. She had a black, cloth facemask, like people wore when they were sick sometimes, and a pair of sunglasses… she was pretty sure she’d just dropped them in the locker the other day.
It crossed her mind to go find Jet. He hadn't looked too good last she caught a glimpse of him, but she’d bolted right down to the locker room almost as soon as they got back to SDN.
He wouldn't want to see her. He'd probably just want to get himself checked out by Alan then head home and pass out, get some sleep. That would be best for him, definitely. What would she even do? Ask if he was okay? What was the point?
God, sleep sounded so nice. She doubted she'd be getting any any time soon. Alaine grimaced as reaching back into her locket sent a stab of pain through her shoulder. Ah, right. She'd been stabbed back there... shallowly, but she probably should've looked at that in the bathroom. Too late then.
There. She felt the mask and sunglasses and pulled them out, quickly putting on the mask and planning to go find that one back door she’d scoped out early in the week. Only, as she turned to do just that, she caught sight of herself in the locker room mirror.
Aw, yikes. She looked… well. Like she’d gotten beaten up by a bunch of clowns. With her hood up, the shadows across her face made her eyes look dark.
Hesitating briefly, she trudged closer to the open sinks and the mirror, looking specifically at the gash in her brow, above her right eye. No wonder she’d been blinking so much blood out of her vision… it was still bleeding a bit, plenty of dried and drying blood smeared all around her brow, her temple, her eye. It looked like it was swelling, too. Lovely.
Alaine hesitated yet again, then stepped a little nearer and tugged her mask down under her chin. The red tear-tracks were still scrawled down her cheeks, and fortunately her nose and busted lip weren’t bleeding anymore, but it didn’t look pretty.
She started to inhale deeply only to stop herself short as pain laced through her ribs, altering the breath to something shallower.
There was a sound behind her. Whether it was just a natural building sound or someone entering the locker room, she didn’t stop to figure out and instead hastily trying to yank the mask up – only to forget she was still holding her sunglasses with that same hand. Said sunglasses subsequently hit her right in her injured eyebrow and Alaine doubled over, snapping out an agitated and very Southern, “OW! Doggone it, son of a frickin’--”
She cut herself off, hissing through a grimace and thumping her fist on the counter weakly. Of course, doubling over had made her ribs ache again, and had stretched out that stabbed shoulder, so, like an idiot, she’d only hurt herself more. “...ow…”
Sucking in a shallow breath, she stayed slightly bent over, trying to keep her unmasked face out of view of whoever might’ve just come in. Weakly waving her arm with the unstabbed shoulder back in the general direction of the locker room, she managed, to whoever might be there, “Sorry – s-sorry, I’m fine…”
Said person approaches slowly- feet dragging just a little as they do. “H-hey- S-Bee- relax- hey- it’s just me.” Each word feels like he has to carefully chisel it from glass. The edges of each piece coming off in his hands.
Jet’s in rough shape. His face is mottled red, black, and blue. Blood vessels burst over the places of impact. He’s been relying on the pure battered shape of his face to protect his identity at this point- having gone maskless since they’d arrived back at SDN. His right eye is swollen shut, and his left one looks like he burst a few blood vessels in it too. Black bruises color his cheek bones. He was going to look even uglier tomorrow.
In his right glove at his side he’s clutching a half melted ice pack. His left one hovers about waist level fingers pointed in Blackstar’s direction. He does not touch her. He just- wants to.
Actually he’s not sure he’s ever wanted anything else more than he wants a hug right now.
That’s probably the painkillers talking- someone gave him a shot of morphine in the medical bay upstairs to tide him over til he got to bed. They figured he had some sort of tolerance. Nah. The injection had immediately felt like the descent on a rollercoaster- but- up? It’d erased the pain, but now it was a dull ache. It wasn’t going to last much longer.
Alaine stared at him, at least with one eye. Her right was squinting a little.
“Jet–” God, he looked awful. Concern twisted up her stomach in knots and before she knew it she was dropping the sunglasses on the counter, already halfway to reaching for him but stopping herself before she could bring her arms up.
“Are you okay?” Jet’s getting a bit more comfortable with speaking now. But his tongue feels fat and slow in his mouth. He tilts his head- and motions vaguely at her side. “Hopefully you got patched up?”
Alaine bit back several different responses before finally managing, “I-I’m okay. I’ll be fine.”
She hesitated. “You look– I mean… you got…?”
The words wouldn’t quite come out right, but she could see the icepack. He must’ve gotten seen to. But suddenly she felt like she needed to go back up there and make sure they’d done everything they possibly could for him.
She saw his hand out of her peripheral, the one not holding the icepack. Her own hovering hands moved on instinct, both going to fold shakily around his, curling over his fingers and palm. She hated her bloody hands and she hated she was touching him with them but she couldn’t help it – she needed it. She had to.
After a moment- he can’t help himself. “Was that-? An accent?” There’s a smile in Jet’s voice, and one side of his mouth quirks up. A dimple appears despite the bruising.
How was he cute? How was he cute like that, looking like he’d been curb stomped by twenty clowns, his poor face all black and blue and red and one eye almost swollen completely shut–
“Uh– y-yeah,” she squeaked, clearing her throat a little and huffing out something that was half a laugh and half something distressed. Somehow she’d completely forgotten about her own pains; it still hurt, it just… wasn’t important anymore. “Yeah, sorry, it – I’ve been told it, um, twangs. Sometimes.”
Mostly when she was particularly animated about something. She tried to tone it down because she felt like people didn’t take her seriously when she was legitimately mad because she was just “y’all”ing and “ain’t”ing and “doggone it all”ing the whole time.
A frown tugs at Jet’s lips.
“Are you okay?” she asked, any amusement fading to concern as she shifted just a little closer, searching Jet’s face intently, eyes dropping to scan him over like she had to double-check the work of the qualified medical team upstairs. “Are you really okay? Do you need anything? Do you need help getting home?”
Forget about getting herself home, this was way more important. She could fly for this. She’d make it work somehow.
Alaine’s close. Close and- looking at him. He takes half a step back, but his hands seem to do the opposite. His fingers curl, hooking themselves tighter to hers. He blinks- trying to process her back to back questions. “Uhhh- I’ve been- better. I’ve been worse. I-” He pauses, mouth getting ahead of his head.
“I could- really use a- uh-” Come on Jet- you’re holding fucking hands. That’s like friendship 2nd base over a regular hug. “a hug?” He’s not thinking straight- maybe this is weird. They met practically yesterday.
Alaine blinked, and her mind started trying to spiral again. Was that a bad idea? Was that a good idea? She hadn’t hugged anyone in about two actual years. She was going to start crying. Would that weird him out? She didn’t want to accidentally hurt him. Was that a consciously-asked question or something concussion induced? Was he concussed? She needed to talk to the medical people upstairs. What if it wasn’t? Why did he want her to hug him? Hadn’t he seen her at the carnival, didn’t he think she was–
Something that wasn’t her mind and might have very well been her heart went ahead and made a decision.
He hadn’t even fully gotten the request out yet and she was already closing in, hands gently letting go of his as her arms looped around him instead. Bloody fingers curled tight against his back as her head dropped lightly against his shoulder, and when she expected to be assaulted by a thousand thoughts and worries–
Her head was quiet. No insistent stars flickered behind her eyes, no anxious energy prickled in her veins.
It wasn’t the most idyllic of situations, no… her rib was hurting and her face was hurting and he was probably hurting too, and they both smelled like blood and sweat and smoke, and they both looked absolutely abysmal.
And somehow, it was the most at peace she’d felt since… forever, really. She couldn’t remember the last time. She couldn’t believe it.
Ignoring the pain in her chest, Alaine let out a deep, shaky sigh against Jet’s shoulder. She wanted to tell him he made it quiet in her head, she wanted to tell him she’d felt his gravity at the carnival and it had kept her from losing her mind but – that wasn’t his problem. She didn’t want him to feel any kind of obligation, she wasn’t asking for anything. Plus, she was afraid if she opened her mouth then she wouldn’t be able to get anything out without blubbering.
So she just kept her mouth shut and closed her eyes for a minute, holding on to Jet and his gravity for what little while she could.
Alaine's arms encircled him slowly. He stiffens, anticipating a zing of pain. There is none. She’s so gentle that he sucks in a breath- filling his lungs just a little too full. A tiny quiet gasp, one that feels like a cool burning in his esophagus. When her head rests on his shoulder he has to thank the people upstairs once more for the morphine. It dulls his aching body. He's so happy that he's only mildly uncomfortable.
When he leans his less injured cheek against her forehead. He barely registers that it happens. Time is getting a bit blotchy for him. His left eye flutters open after a little while. One of his arms is wrapped around her shoulders, the other is around her mid back. The warmth of the woman in his arms is like a blanket on his nerves.
“Thanks.” His appreciation spills out softly.
Alaine took a breath to respond, but she immediately felt that lump in her throat and knew she’d better not… so instead she just nodded faintly, a gentle motion he could probably feel against his cheek.
Vertigo spikes, and he feels his body begin to tip to compensate. The hypoxia from the thin air was not doing him any favors. Reluctantly he lifts his cheek from her to speak.
“And- I uh- could call Rey to come and get me. I’m half expecting him to be waiting for me at my place. Are you okay to fly?”Jet is starting to feel a little silly not having a car in L.A. He didn’t want to impose on her, and it seemed to be coming up a lot. But there was always ridesharing.
Still struggling with feeling a little choked up, Alaine shook her head ‘no’ before she caught herself and hastily nodded out a false ‘yes’, only to feel bad immediately and shrug out an indecisive bob of her head instead.
“I… could manage,” she answered, clearing her throat lightly in an attempt to get rid of that shaky note in her voice. “I mean, I’ll. Um. I’ll figure it out.”
Trying to skip past it, she asked, her eyes doing yet another concerned sweep over him, “Do you have a phone? I’ve–” Oh. She only had her real phone in her locker. …Well, he could use it to call some friend of his. Nobody could track that to Blackstar. Probably. “I-I’ve got one you can use if you need. And you – I could give you my number, too. If you want. I mean if you feel like you might need anything, um, later. And Rey’s not available.”
Jet rests his cheek on her head once more. “Yeah, let’s call Rey. He’ll help us get home. How far are you from my place?” It’s not firm, but it’s assumptive. He can’t imagine the wind burning a facial wound. He lets go gently, catching himself on the counter beside them. His stomach swoops lightly.
She made a muffled huffing sound against his shoulder before he pulled back, trying to feel exasperated or anxious or something like that, something she probably should’ve been feeling. Instead she just felt overwhelmingly grateful, and still kind of emotional, and very very tired.
Pulling back a little herself as Jet let go, she let her arms slip away from him, one hand lifting to hastily wipe across her eyes. “Uh…” Her puzzling over the distance between their places faltered for a second when she saw him wobble, hand twitching instinctively; but he caught himself and she relaxed partially.
“Uh… I’m not really sure,” she admitted. Flight distance wasn’t too bad, but flight distance wasn’t too bad anywhere. She knew how to get between their places in the air, but if she had to do it from the ground she’d be completely lost.
Alaine hesitated briefly as she turned to the backpack she’d left sitting on the counter a moment ago, reaching in to feel out her phone under her discarded and bundled-up suit; she had to take a second to boot it back up, a red and blue image of a dragon lighting up the lock screen as she spoke again.
“It’s, um… River Valley,” she managed to remember the name of her apartment building. One that struck her as odd, given it wasn’t in a valley nor near a river. Maybe it was just trying to sound ritzy to disguise the fact it was one of the cheapest options available. Quickly unlocking the phone and handing it over, almost a little shyly, she tried not to look like she was watching everything he was doing.
It wasn’t that she really had anything to hide, nothing that he’d be able to find unless he went looking at her texts and found her family’s addresses or something. She was just a little embarrassed that he might see her home screen, which was a picture of her at probably ten years old, beaming ear to ear with braces while holding up a fat tabby cat that was probably half as big as she was.
When she hands him the phone, the first thing he does is put his contact in. ‘Jet 🚀’, he presses the camera button, holds it up and takes a picture of the hot mess that is his face.“There, now you’ll remember which Jet it is.” Then without further thought he punches in Rey’s number.
“Thank goodness,” she mumbled, unable to help a weak grin of amusement.
One ring, two, and it picks up. An older warm voice answers the phone. “Hello-? Jet?” There’s a lot of worry in his best friend’s voice and it makes him wince. He guesses the news coverage was pretty intense.
“Rey- I’m fine.” He catches the look Alaine gives him and amends his statement. “Well- mostly- I’m just banged up.”
“That looked brutal- are you at the office?” In the background he hears the man pick up his full keyring and the chime of his door. A warmth bursts in his chest.
“Y-yeah. Me and-” he looks up, meeting Alaine’s eyes, and then quickly up at the ceiling. “-a friend need a lift home- do you mind?” He sucks on his bottom lip.
“I’ll be there in fifteen.” He hands the phone back to Alaine after he hangs up. His chest feels tight, thankful that Rey is his family. “Rey’ll be here in fifteen. Let’s get out of here.”
She took the device back, casually shutting it completely off again before sticking back down in the bottom of her backpack, which she proceeded to gather up and tug over her right shoulder to avoid that aching stab wound on the left. The sunglasses went on and the facemask went up as they made their way outside and waited, but after about two minutes she’d resolved to take them off again once in the safety of Rey’s vehicle. They were really irritating the various little injuries scattered across her face.
Rey drives an old wide pickup with a bench seat. Jet climbs in first. He sits with the gear box between his legs, which leaves plenty of room- and a seatbelt- for Alaine beside him. In the driver seat is Rey- he’s wearing a purple Lakers jersey. The color reflects onto his cheeks, turning his normally copper-toned black skin a cooler color.
Alaine’s face automatically started to crack into a smile at the sight of the old pickup, but the motion hurt so she muscled it down. It reminded her of her dad’s truck. Climbing in after Jet, she let her small backpack sit in her lap, proceeding to remove the sunglasses and tug the mask down under her chin again. If Jet trusted Rey, she figured she could too… plus, she hardly looked like herself at the moment.
“Rey- this is Bee. Bee- this is my best friend Rey.” Rey leans forward around Jet, offering a wave.
Alaine returned it, a touch embarrassed about the state she was in. But Rey had kind eyes, and that – plus the way her leg rested against Jet’s – put her at ease. “Hi. Thank you for the ride.”
“Hi Bee, nice to meet you.” Rey leans forward to wave politely with a kind smile. The older man is shifting into gear the second he hears Alaine’s seatbelt click. He takes the opportunity to knock into Jet- it’s careful on account of how banged up he looks- but it’s also a warning. A hundred words in one action.
Seatbelt safely on, Alaine sank back against the worn seat, wincing a bit but letting out a small, relieved sigh. Thank God she didn’t have to walk home. Now that she was sitting, the exhaustion was hitting hard.
Jet reaches over Rey. That earns him a scolding- “Hey man- watch it I’m trying to drive here.” He plucks the phone from its stand on the left side of the wheel. Unlocking the phone with a swipe code is muscle memory.
Very quietly, the GPS begins directing them.
Sleep wasn’t going to come easy, if at all, when she got back to her apartment. She knew that already. She felt alright at the moment – mentally, anyway – between the depletion of cosmic energy and Jet’s grounding presence, but once that was gone?
Alaine cringed a bit, not wanting to think about it. Instead she sank a little in her seat, subconsciously gravitating towards Jet in the middle until her shoulder nudged him.
“Thank you,” she mumbled, specifically to him, leaning back and closing her eyes for a minute as the rumbling of the old pickup created a familiar kind of white noise.
With a brief nod, he presses his ankle against hers. The connection point lights up his nerves like a Christmas tree. “Yeah Bee- literally- any time.” Jet replies softly.
It’s a little while until they make it to Alaine’s apartment, but when they roll up, Jet finds himself wishing they could all just go back to his place. But that’s not in the cards. Despite the meds wearing off, he shifts his wait to the edge of the bench after her. His feet dangle above the ground, and Jet freezes.
He wants to get out, and walk her up to the door. There’s a lot they didn’t talk about. Like- when he’d gotten his shit kicked in- he never thanked her from hauling him off the ground. How they might explain their 15 minute break if asked. Or about where their carnival prizes ended up- he’d win her a new one. He just needed the chance.
Looking back at Rey, he’s surprised to see the old man looking out the driverside window. Jet feels like he’s tucked in a safe little valley between two of his safe people. He’s not sure he’s really ever had two at the same time. This observation prompts his anxiety to claw out of the void he’s stuffed it into.
The mask came back up, though Alaine hesitated to put the sunglasses on because of how they messed with her right brow. Slipping out of the pickup once it had stopped safely, she pulled the backpack back over her shoulder and was immediately reminded that she’d just been beaten up by a million crazy clowns. Ow… Wow, she already knew tomorrow was going to hurt.
She hesitated as she glanced up at the building, not looking forward to the walk in, not looking forward to the confined space of the elevator, not looking forward to the empty silence of her apartment. Just thinking about spending the next few days off rotting there alone made her wish they hadn’t been given the extra downtime. She’d rather work through the pain than sit in it.
Alaine sucked in a shallow breath and decided she ought to thank Rey again. Anything for one less minute she had to be alone.
Alaine turns to face him as Jet reaches out. His powers are still under the weather- but he can feel their beings laying on the picnic blanket of the universe. This was something he did when he was separated from Rey in prison. Check that he was upright, around, moving like normal. Detecting someone across a prison was great practice for him. Once, he’d done that, and something had been wrong.
Alaine’s bright eyes interrupt the resurfacing of that memory- and he swallows. His chest squeezes- and he attempts once more to slide from the bench seat. A shot of pain shoots down his neck and he hisses.
“Hey–” She reached out with the hand not currently holding her sunglasses, gently catching hold of his arm. “You okay?” She was frowning, but it was a concerned expression. Hopefully that came through the grime and blood and the mask over the lower half of her face. “Be careful…”
Was he trying to get out? What for? Alaine searched his face, realizing she felt that tug again. The way she had in the middle of everything at the carnival. Something in her chest, stirred up by the dread of being alone with her own misery all weekend, suddenly seemed to settle.
Inwardly, almost subconsciously, she let out a breath of relief. Followed immediately by a little exasperation at herself. She knew the best thing for him was probably to go home and sleep – maybe be with Rey, who knew him better, who’d know how to help him. But–
But she wished she had actual food up there in her apartment. Or a couch. Something. She’d take ibuprofen if it meant she’d feel good enough to try and make something for a just-got-our-asses-kicked-but-hey-we’re-still-alive dinner. Of course it’d been a hot minute since she’d made real food, but she’d try. She could invite him up. She could invite Rey up too. Was that crazy? It wouldn’t be denying herself the pain she deserved if it was to help somebody else. Right? That would be okay, wouldn’t it?
Alaine swallowed, realizing she was still holding onto Jet’s arm. Holding onto that gravity, pretending it was keeping her boots planted right there on the curb. “...You’re gonna be okay, right?” she asked. Maybe that was rude, given he had a best friend in the truck right behind him who was probably more than capable of making sure he was okay… but she couldn’t help it.
Jet feels his blood heat when she reaches out. “Y-yeah. Rey’s gonna patch me up the rest of the way. This is old hat for us.” Rey grumbles quietly.
“I’d–” The words were coming out before she could think to double-check them first. “I’d invite y’all up but I– I don’t have, um… seating.” Literally. Unless they were cool with sitting on the counter or the floor. She knew it wasn’t really a good time for hanging out, she just wanted to make sure he could take a break before going again, if he needed it.
…She just wanted to know he was okay, really, and there was no way for her to know that if he left.
And, selfishly – so, so selfishly – she didn’t want to be alone.
You’re an adult. She could practically hear her mom’s voice in her ear. Being an adult means doing things you don’t like. You’ve got to do things on your own.
Jet offers her a smile, “text me later.” He has to stop himself from pulling her back into the cab. “I'll let you know when I'm settled too.” It's friendly, but there's a very obvious softness.
His other hand covers hers. A light squeeze. And then he's swinging his legs back into the truck. “I need to go before I fall over on either of you.”
Alaine swallowed her protests and nodded, holding onto his arm for a second more before he was pulling himself back into the truck.
“Okay–” She bit back another ‘be careful’. “I’ll… see you Monday, I guess.” She managed a small smile, leaning a little to bob her head to Rey and add, “Thank you again for the ride. It was nice meeting you.”
Alaine stood back then so Jet could actually close the passenger door, lingering on the curb as the truck pulled away. She tried to focus inward for a second, honing in on that grounding feeling she knew was Jet’s gravity; still unused to the practice and lacking the full force of her cosmic energy, she seemed to fumble a bit at actively reaching for it. But she managed, and stood there for a moment more even after the pickup was out of sight. Little by little, she could feel the distance stretching out between them.
It was a little depressing, actually.
Taking a breath, she finally turned to the building to start the dreaded trip up to her apartment. It took her a little longer than she would’ve liked, thanks to someone stepping into the elevator ahead of her which prompted her to immediately change course and make for the stairs instead, as if she was in good physical condition to climb six flights of stairs. Still, she’d rather physical pain than a potential panic attack in the elevator.
The backpack was dropped on the floor the second she was inside her place, door nudged shut behind her and locked. She didn't bother turning the light on in the main area, simply shuffling through the dark to her room and the bathroom, where she did finally flip on a light. Now would begin the unpleasant task of patching herself up, but she paused before she started to pull her phone out of her hoodie pocket.
She unlocked it and opened up her contacts, staring at the new one.
Jet 🚀. His poor face looking up at her from the contact icon made her wince a little in sympathy before she moved to send a text…
…And then just stared at the textbox blankly for five minutes. That probably made it about twenty minutes since she’d parted ways with Rey and Jet, since it had taken her around fifteen to get up to her place with all the breaks she took on the landings between floors.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity of hesitation, she typed out something simple. He just needed her number after all, it was simple. She didn’t need to overthink it.
Hey, it’s Bee.
She paused, then deleted the cold-sounding period and replaced it with a waving emoji.
Hey, it’s Bee 👋
Yeah, that was better. Alaine sent it, then set her phone down on the counter, gave herself a grimace in the dingy mirror, and got to work.
It finds Jet- laying on his back on Rey’s kitchen island. Between the several stories of steps into his building and Rey's spare bed, Rey had driven to Jet’s place, added food to Ducky's tank using the week slow release feeder, collected Jet's go bag- of course he had one, and his phone.
“If you would just let me cut it off-” Rey complains as he painstakingly removes Jet's uniform. The blood has started to adhere fabric to wounds, and for the first time since he got it, he hates his costume. Rey pries up a section at his side and Jet swears loudly.
“As much as I hate it right now, this thing is technically on loan to me.” Jet tries to recall the cost he'd assume for ruining it further, but can't. Rey swears under his breath.
In his hand, his prepaid phone buzzes. An unknown number and a friendly hello. Hovering the phone close to his working eye- he saves her contact as ‘✨️Starshine✨️’.
“So you like her huh?” Rey asks, an eyebrow quirked up at him.
Jet chokes- “well- she’s- uh- she’s my coworker- uh.”
The older man waits for a straight answer.
“I’m really that obvious?”
Rey hums out a yes. Jet quickly types a message back to her- not wanting to leave her on read. ‘Hey Bee- at Rey’s. You holding up alright?’
“Well- yeah. I don’t know her well yet- but it’s- so different than it was with anyone else. She’s- not like anyone else.” There’s a sense of wonder in his voice.
He’s brought crashing back down to Earth with the burn of antiseptic.
The red tear-tracks took some scrubbing, but she got them off her cheeks. The blood crusted on her eyelid was a little trickier but she managed that too after a while, tediously cleaning the split in her brow above where all the blood had been coming from. It probably should've gotten a stitch or two. Instead it got some hydrogen peroxide and a couple of butterfly bandages, with a messy medical tape and gauze situation on top for the bleeding. It was swollen, too. She'd have to find something to put ice in.
Wasn't much she could do for a split lip except clean it, same with the busted nose. At least those had both stopped bleeding. Her right ear was a little bloody, but the injury seemed surface-level since her hearing didn't appear to be impacted. The bruises forming were inevitable, nothing to be done for those but more ice, assuming she had enough on hand. Any other cuts and scrapes were dealt with, scattered all over her body but mostly on her arms and torso.
Aside from her brow and that broken rib, the stab wound on the back of her left shoulder was the only other bad injury. Tricky to get to, too. Alaine refused to let herself wish someone was there to help. Everybody had their own wounds to lick. She focused on the act of giving herself first aid, fighting the mental despair with a simple, one-task train of thought. In the end, although her shoulder also probably needed stitches, it got an even messier butterfly bandage, gauze and medical tape job. She found some velcro wraps too and wound it haphazardly around her upper torso and over her shoulder to hold her gauze work in place, looking critically at herself in the mirror but knowing it'd just have to do.
Locked in with a one-track mind, she pushed herself to her feet and padded back into the kitchen, opening a drawer and grabbing the one bottle of pills kept there, muscle memory making her sore hands start to twist the lid off as she headed blindly back for the bathroom... before she realized what she was doing.
Blinking and looking down at the bottle of ibuprofen in the hallway, Alaine stared at the label for a second.
...Where did she get off, taking pain killer? What right on Earth did she have to try and take the edge off the pain she was feeling?
She deserved it. Like a medieval monk whipping himself as penance for his sins, she had to pay for what she'd done.
With a sudden surge of self-hatred she wrenched the lid off, storming into the bathroom and upending the bottle of pills over the toilet, proceeding to throw it, empty, into the trash and vehemently hitting the flush before she could second-guess it. Tears stinging her eyes she stepped back, catching sight of herself in the dingy mirror.
...Who even was that, looking back at her?
Alaine turned the light off.
Her phone had buzzed a while ago but she hadn't stopped to check it yet, busy with her first aid. Alone in her room then, however, she finally went to check the screen and blinked quickly a couple of times so she could actually see.
Hey Bee- at Rey’s. You holding up alright?
She sucked in a deep breath to bolster herself and instead stopped herself mid-breath as her side flared with pain; of course the sudden hitch in air sent her into a cough, which didn't feel much better. She sank onto the bed, wheezing, and attempted to lie down.
Ow. Everything hurt.
Holding her phone up in front of her face once she finally got herself situated in a way that felt as little painful as possible -- Alaine started to tap out an automatic response.
Yeah, I'm fine.
She scowled at the three-word draft. No, I'm not fine. She hated lying. She'd hated lying since she was a kid and that was all she'd ever done. I'm fine. It didn't hurt. I'm not scared. I want to go. I'm fine. It'd only got worse -- now she was insisting she'd never been at that cartel compound in Arizona, she'd never killed an innocent old man and run, she was in control of whatever alien energy was coiled up in her body--
Alaine grit her teeth, feeling the intense urge to just let it out, somehow. Throw the phone. Scream. Draw something. None of it was an option, so she was left with the usual number; seething in place until the boil had tempered down enough for her to take the pot off the stove and pretend it hadn't burnt.
After a few torturously long minutes, she finally lifted her phone again. Deleting her first attempt, she tried again. I'll be okay.
That was more honest. She sent it, hesitated, then typed again. Make sure you eat something.
The text was sent before she could overthink that, too, and she put her phone down on the bed, gingerly folding her hands over her stomach and staring up at the dark ceiling.
Nothing left to do but spiral.
BLACKSTAR
After a week of laid-back dispatching, Alaine was feeling a little better. She was still full of aches and pains, and her broken rib was going to take a couple more weeks to be healed properly… the swelling had gone down in the various places she’d been dealing with it, and most of her other injuries were all covered by her suit. The black-on-black one, which she’d gone right back to on Monday.
She didn’t like the way blood showed up so obviously on the black and white one.
For the most part, aside from favoring of that right side of the ribcage or left shoulder – Alaine was pretty good at acting like her lie about a fast-acting healing factor was real. She was still a bit bruised up in the face where her mask didn’t cover, and her lower lip had still obviously been split last week, but if someone brought it up she was sure she could come up with something about why that hadn’t healed up already.
Getting back to work was a relief, honestly, even with the residual pain. She would’ve almost rather worked through the weekend and the worst days of the initial recovery, rather than sit in her apartment and… spiral. Or rot. Or exist in agony without any form of distraction whatsoever.
Or whatever she’d been doing in that run-on sentence of a weekend.
Making it to SDN on Friday, she was without the joyous flight of the previous week; Gaggles Carnival had apparently snapped her into a very, very serious mindset, at least for the time being, and she took her morning commute straight to work and back again in the evening.
That morning, though, she didn’t take the trip alone. In her backpack was a small, golden friend; when Lightning Girl had managed to recover the various stuffed animals she’d collected for her teammates at the beginning of their carnival dispatch, she’d brought back the tote bag Alaine had been using to stash Panda safely away. The tote also held, stuffed securely under the giant teddy, a couple pairs of “Giggles”-themed sweatpants and t-shirts, and two more stuffed animals, much smaller – a little red and black bear, and an adorable golden puppy.
The latter had been freshly laundered, and Alaine had gone out of her way the evening before to buy a white ribbon for it… said ribbon was currently tied around the puppy’s neck in a bow, and Alaine fiddled with it as she made her way down to the gym in SDN’s basement. When she’d asked someone where Lightning Girl was, they’d pointed her that way.
Sure enough, upon entering, she found the white-haired heroine hard at work. She wasn’t in her usual suit, instead wearing a sleek gym set that was still nicely reminiscent of her suit.
Alaine was relieved to see LG seemed back to health, at least mostly if not completely. She’d been worried about that stab wound, as much as it had been bleeding, and she was always a little worried that other people did what she did – saying they were fine when they really should’ve just gone and gotten medical help.
But no, Lightning Girl seemed properly on the mend. Physically, at least, who was to say how she was doing mentally. Alaine was pretty sure Gaggles’ deathfest had messed with all their heads.
Clearing her throat a little, she walked further into the gym, puppy in arm. “Hey, morning. Hope I’m not interrupting a set,” she greeted, managing a small grin. She’d specifically waited to try and catch LG between sets, but of course she didn’t know what routine the other heroine was following. “I, um…”
Suddenly she felt awkward. She glanced down at the stuffed animal she held, then gently held it out to Lightning Girl. “This is for you. I was going to give it to you… uh, well. Last week. But something happened with a bunch of clowns, so. Got kind of derailed.”
Weak joke, but she wasn’t entirely sure how everyone else was coping yet. “I cleaned him up,” she assured LG, as an afterthought. “But I get it if it’s like a… uh, very unwanted reminder of one of the worst days ever.”
The white-haired, white gym-costumed heroine turned her head hearing the door open, seeing the heroine in her black on black variant of a costume walk on through, injuries covered, for just about the most part. Lightning Girl could just, just faintly tell there was something up, maybe not all of it, but everyone’s healing factor worked differently. She didn’t really ask others, same way you didn’t ask about names, or other things….
But in any case, she was glad to see Blackstar was back on her feet. Everything had been a blur that afternoon. All of it. From being in hospital for a check up, to just seeing the team again on Monday, it had all not quite sunk in yet.
It was why that morning that dream had come back. Not called for, wanted, known. But seeing the dark-energied heroine brought a smile to her face, placing the kettlebell down into the ground with a hard thump into rubber matting. And with that tote bag, with a golden retriever like. Lightning Girl ran across grabbing her rubber gloves as Blackstar walked in, almost making the usual mental note to go for them just in case. Blackstar was mysterious, but she could half imagine the face, given she wasn’t wearing the full mask like before- her black hair hiding some red that only more recently LG had managed to spot.
“Blackstar…..awww, you really shouldn’t have. Thank you!” Lightning Girl smiled, hugging the shorter heroine, squishing the dog between them both before gently rotating it around, noticing the little ribbon that had been attached. Her face was full of glee, as Sophie took off her mask, indicating comfort around Blackstar. She’d already seen her face. Not exactly like it was going to make much difference.
“Yeah, lots happened with the clowns. That is an understatement. And don’t worry, you’re not interrupting. I’m just lugging a kettlebell until my shoulders hurt. I don’t have a plan…..I’m not that organised. Just pretending to be.” She chuckled, gently placing the pup down by her gym bag, kneeling and giggling, looking back. “You know, somewhere in that darkness there’s a heart of gold in there, Blackstar. That is so sweet of you….difficult as that day was, thank you for thinking of me. Guess you found my equivalent.” Sophie smiled at her with at least some self awareness, before standing up, stretching out, realising she should probably push the loose power cable out of the way before Alaine shocked herself.
She breathed out, sighing, leaning against the far wall, just grateful. Happy. So pleased with this all. But knowing Blackstar’s affection, as nice as it was, also came from that gentle worry about….well, that day. With her mask up, Sophie wondered how Blackstar might see the costumed heroine that was Lightning Girl, as right now, she felt like she was in the ether between them. Probably for the best. This time without the blood at least.
“How are you holding up? Sorry if you’re not used to the face, it’s……well, I’m realising you probably saw it, so no point pretending to hide between us. It helps me divide from who I am at home to this.” She added, her words trailing a little towards the end. She shook her head. “Like my innie and outie.” She chuckled with reference to the only comparison she had recently seen with James on TV, shaking her head, her white hair, a tiny, tiny fragment of blue tip in the end of her white locks revealed as she turned, the mark of where she’d been hit in the head still just about visible without the mask. That was taking longer to heal, but she was lucky to have a head of locks to cover the cut.
Alaine was still stunned from the hug. She’d been standing there in pretty much the same place since it happened, and she’d probably look more surprised if raising her eyebrows hadn’t hurt and forced her back into an easier expression.
She swallowed, still not fully in control of her emotions from last Thursday. Having her powers get such a hold on her seemed to leave her struggling to get things under control again. Or maybe that was just the lack of sleep. …Or a myriad of other things, actually.
“Oh, uh. Y-Yeah,” she finally spoke up, brain whirling as she seemed to try and catch up on everything LG had just said all at once. Somewhere in that darkness there’s a heart of gold in there. Lightning Girl was probably just being funny, but Blackstar felt a lump trying to form in her throat.
She blinked, focusing as Lightning Girl took her mask off; Alaine had a similar thought to the one she’d had at the carnival last week, that the white-haired heroine somehow didn’t look all that wildly different without the mask. Like she was Lightning Girl with or without it.
At least the pretty came through much better without the blood and grime. Alaine’s head tilted slightly as she watched the other heroine moving around, noting the injury still slightly visible and what looked like a little blue dye in the white hair. It was probably so easy to dye her hair different colors. Alaine bet if LG tried that holo hair style it would look so cool.
Blinking and refocusing yet again, she cleared her throat and gave a small shake of her head. “Oh, no, it’s fine. I mean, I’m not used to the face, but – you just look like you.” She shrugged a little, though the movement was less pronounced with her left shoulder. “...Which I guess isn’t great to hear if it’s how you divide home-you and work-you.”
She managed another small smile, mildly apologetic. She wasn’t trying to say the mask didn’t work, and she obviously didn’t know at-home Sophie… in the simplest sense, as far as she knew, LG was just LG, even without the mask. But she meant it in a good way – even if that was her civilian face, Lightning Girl still looked like someone Alaine could imagine being a hero.
“I’m, uh – I’m doing fine, though,” she answered that question finally. It was half-true. “I mean, better than last week, anyway.” That was true, at least.
Alaine debated removing her own mask. But… well, LG would see her busted eye if she did and then her lie about healing would be blown.
Also she had a sudden feeling of horror in her gut at the idea of Lightning Girl connecting the slaughter Blackstar had committed with Alaine’s face.
That’s not me, she wanted to say. But was it? She didn’t know. That was almost as bad.
Speaking of. Alaine took a deep breath – or started to, and cut herself off with a wince. She kept trying to inhale and calm herself down while forgetting about that broken rib. Pushing through, she frowned a little as she glanced down, absently scuffing one booted foot against the floor.
“Speaking of, um. Last week.” She cleared her throat again, shifting to look at LG where the latter had leaned against the wall. Her black-gloved hands fiddled together, feeling her partially-healed knuckles under the dark material. “I’m…” Her throat felt dry all of the sudden. “I’m sorry about… I’m sorry I was… um. The way I was. Near the end, there. I mean I’m sorry you had to see… that.”
She felt she had to apologize. She didn’t like what she’d done, even if maybe she’d had to do it. In any case, the distaste in her voice was palpable at the last word, as if she was talking about some ill-behaved evil twin.
Lightning Girl shook her head, knowing Blackstar was full of doubt, worry, concern. Maybe Sophie should have had more of that herself, but between them, there was nothing to say.
Even in spite of the private worry she had internally, she wouldn’t let it out at all. She wasn’t going to let Blackstar feel bad. Not one bit. That wasn’t happening on her watch.
“Don’t apologize, Blackstar. You saved a lot of lives that day. We all did. Sometimes it isn’t about the means, it’s about the ends. And they really wanted to kill us, so……what choice did we have. A shame we had to live through it but sometimes, being a hero is just doing things most people can’t. We need to try and be strong for them. Even if we’re not inside. And that can be hard.” She replied, gently bending over and picking up a bottle of water, sipping away to replace the electrolytes she’d began to set fire to the moment she started lifting what looked like a weight that would look like to most to have the density of a neutron star.
She didn’t admit to Blackstar that with the last trailing words, yeah, she knew it. Not the same way, but she knew that feeling. The nightmare this morning. Just stewing. Playing it back. Things done different that could have happened. And so on.
“I’m sorry you had to come over and save my stupid arse from being overrun by clowns who wanted to cut me up like a steak. Fucking hell. That was really, really dumb of me. Word of advice, Blackstar, do as I say, not as I do….if I’m going to be some sort of mentor, that shit, that was stupid of me to put myself in that position without thinking.” She retorted, shaking her head, leaning against the wall.
Dividing home her and work her. Was she really not that different? Maybe it was true. The mask didn’t cover much of her face at all, it was literally a cowl from nose to forehead, and with white hair, she stood out like a lemon in an apple orchard. Blackstar maybe saw deeper into that than Sophie would have liked. It was that filter, the thing that stopped the two sides of her crossing. The mask was someone who Sophie wasn’t, and right now, without it, she was realising those two were very much blurring. More than she perhaps had realised they had.
She decided to change the topic rather than talk that over, looking to the kettlebell shaped object between the two of them. Maybe to take things away. Shoved in as awkward as could be, but, it was better than talking last Thursday. For a lot of reasons even LG didn’t want to really dwell on.
“Hmm, on another topic…..and I know you’re not a fan, but do you fancy giving this kettlebell a lift? You look like you’re strong but I was curious what you thought. You know, just in case you need to carry the entire team or something.” Lightning Girl bonked the big thing with her foot, and it made a dull, low-toned donk, as if to justify just how dense it was, with a gentle chuckle, playful as ever, trying to keep the topic diverted and lighter.
Blackstar’s foot kept scuffing absently at the ground as Lightning Girl assured her they’d done what we needed to do, which sometimes meant doing things other people couldn’t. It was oddly reminiscent of what James had been saying earlier last week, when handing her the form for arm severation. Was severation a word?
She shook her head slightly. Was she really being strong for the people who couldn’t be when she just… went psycho on a threat? Maybe that argument worked for the carnival, but what about in Arizona?
“Yeah. Hard,” she mumbled, lost in thought. Remembering the feeling of stabbing into someone so hard that her fists were in his lungs.
LG speaking again pulled her out of her thoughts and Alaine blinked, looking over and immediately shaking her head. “Hey, no, you couldn’t have known there were that many clowns. There were, like, a bazillion of them. I got overwhelmed really quickly at first too, I don’t know where they all came from.”
That question still sat a little uncomfortably in the back of her mind. Who exactly had she been killing, anyway?
She’d almost hit Lightning Girl with one of her energy blades. It was something that had hardly left her mind at all since it happened. What was that lapse? Weariness? Being on edge? What if it was just some horrible, dark part of her that didn’t care what she was aiming at and just wanted to kill?
Alaine didn’t fully comprehend what LG said about the kettlebell, just catching that she’d been asked to lift it. “Hm? Oh, yeah, sure.”
She stepped over, mind successfully distracted as her train of thought shifted. She didn’t know how heavy it was, but it looked like it weighed a ton. She knew for sure she could lift at least two tons when needed, so… of course, it had been a while since she’d had to and she’d never done it while recovering from being beaten to a pulp by clowns.
Alaine huffed a little, lightly kicking at the weight with her boot like she was trying to judge the heft of it before crouching to lift it. Her form was less like someone who knew what they were doing in the gym and more like someone who did a lot of manual labor.
Of course she forgot about her stupid broken rib. She’d only lifted the kettlebell a few inches when she was abruptly reminded of said rib and faltered, biting the inside of her cheek to stifle an undignified sound of pain.
You’re fine, you’re fine, she chanted at herself mentally, huffing and continuing to lift. You have to at least pretend you’re fine, idiot…
“Hah. Heavy,” she mused, adjusting her stance a little and, with some effort, straightening almost completely. But dang it that rib hurt, and she was forced to casually lower the weight again and let it hit the matted floor with a soft thud.
“I could lift it,” she insisted, giving the kettlebell a dirty look. “I think I’m still just a bit tired.” Understatement of the year. “I’ve picked up cars before,” she tacked on, as if further substantiating her claim.
Alaine paused, then added simply, like it was a simple matter of fact, “If I need to pick something up, I’ll pick it up.”
Not minding the change of topic, all things considered, she glanced over at Lightning Girl curiously. This was the second time she’d found the white-haired heroine in the gym, but she wasn’t sure how much of LG’s strength was power-induced and how much was just built muscle. “What’s the heaviest you’ve… lifted?” she asked, not sure about the correct terminology. There were different kinds of lifting, right? Like benching was different than lifting? She really wasn’t too sure.
Lightning Girl chuckled, putting two hands and carefully dragging it along, the thing now beginning to feel heavier in her grip than it had earlier. Blackstar still was hurting a little, that was an unforeseen side effect, but, she had a point, probably given her powers relied on the heat of the moment. Based on at least, everything Sophie had seen so far. She was clearly hurt though. Sophie might have healed faster, but she was lucky enough that with enough electricity, the wound could stitch back up quickly enough. For Blackstar, she was still clearly hurt.
“Heaviest I’ve lifted? Uhh…..good question. It was a real blur, but probably a couple of tonnes. Van drove over someone and I just, uhhh, pushed until someone dragged them away.” Sophie replied, not touching on Alaine’s moves, but well, keeping off that. An interesting question she posed back, mind….
“Well, you know where to find me if you do want to carry things…..weirdly, it’s not my thing that I was…..ever into. Just helps me build a bit of strength I guess so the powers sit nicer. I can’t explain it entirely. None of it really makes sense. I’ve had this 14 years. And I’m still finding out stuff.” She was so matter of fact, not really dwelling too much, not if she wanted to add to her internal monologue of all the insane shit no person should have ever seen.
And as awkward as Blackstar was, in the quiet of the gym, with nobody else, something else leapt into her mind.
Something she’d been meaning to ask, actually, quite a long time. A suspicion she had for a while, the same one she had about Asteroid. Something personal to herself, a projection in a way.
“Blackstar, if you don’t mind me asking, how did you get your powers?”
Alaine blinked.
“How did–” She started and stopped again. “Oh. Well.”
She’d never told anybody, had she? Not aside from John, anyway. Would it hurt? …Well, it’d probably make her look like a hero baby, only having gotten her powers about two years ago while LG had apparently had hers for over a decade.
“Um. I was in–” Alaine started and stopped yet again, not sure how much she should really say. Did it matter that it had happened in Arizona? Maybe not, except that the cartel incident had also been in Arizona. Had LG heard about that? Maybe not, it had been Arizona news but maybe not California news…
Blackstar hesitated. “I was out in the hills, around two years ago. And, um… well.” She huffed out an awkward little laugh. “It’s kind of vague. I don’t really know what happened for sure, there was just… a shooting star? A meteor. I guess technically a meteorite because I think it came down and whacked me in the head. Or something.”
She shrugged, once more favoring that left shoulder slightly. “I woke up in the impact crater. It looked like an impact crater anyway, a little shallow one. Still, if it was enough to do that, I don’t really know how come it didn’t blow me open. Anyway.”
Her boot was scuffing at the floor once more, but that time it was more absent-minded than nervous. “It fried my phone though, and I don’t know how long I was out. I wandered back to some town and–”
And accidentally killed a sweet old man who was just trying to help. And then made the conscious decision to run away and leave him there on the sidewalk.
Alaine went very still and quiet for a second before shaking it off. “The blades just sort of… popped up. I found out I could fly because I had some weird dream and woke up in the air, started experimenting from there.”
She glanced over at LG, wondering if that sounded legitimate enough. It was all the truth, for once, save the lack of detail about the discovery of her cosmic blades and the omission of the exact location.
“Yeah, not very impressive I guess. And not very long ago either.” She huffed out an embarrassed laugh. “Dang, fourteen years for you though, huh? I feel like a baby.”
Sophie laughed on that last comment, smiling as she folded her arms to her gut, leaning against the wall, thinking on that.
Damn, she was really new to this. Two years to be able to do all of that was impressive. Alaine had come a hell of a long way. To go from no powers to a costume in two years, well, that was something immense.
“That is impressive…..wild how fast you got into it!” She smiled, confident as ever, trying her best to big up her new work bestie. And thinking on her own progress. 14 years. It had been a lot of work. No less the time in the forest, the attempts to fly and failing, and constant work. It hadn’t been given easy to her. It felt like making the most out of the power took all the work it did.
“I barely had control two years in so you’re doing well. I could barely project a bolt. I would either just cascade shock everything around me or produce less electricity than an electric fence on contact.The former meant I basically started deflecting people away from me. Which is fun when you’re a teenager.” She added with a sigh thinking back to those times, knowing that Alaine seemed visibly nervous.
So she tried to take some heat and swing it back to her. Not for selfish reasons, more just so Alaine didn’t feel worried. Sophie seemed to astroturf that statement heavily, not giving it the inflection that maybe came with what she had just stated.
It was creeping in more and more. Sophie thought all Americans were so confident, positive mindset people, and yet here she was, from a rainy, cynical country, outdoing them. Was it just what being nearly blonde was like? Or was it her covering her own tracks?
She put that thought out of her mind thinking about the rest of what Alaine had said.
“Yeah, it’s been a while. I guess I had my suspicions, cosmic themed and all. For me, it was a comet fragment that got me, not an asteroid though. Landed in a park back home in Manchester…..then put a bolt through me when I went to look at it. Next thing I know I was in hospital and everything that seems to make a current would be pulled to me. Like it’s a magnetism, it seems to just absorb and my body just seems to…..I’m not sure. Like the more electricity I take on, the more I seem to be alive, but the more volatile I feel. It’s been a long process….taming it was hard. So yeah. You might be a baby relative to me, but honestly, this has been a long process.” She was open about it. “But worth it. There’s no call to the void, yet……it’s I guess just a suspicion I had when I saw you and Asteroid were all astral. And I wondered how it affected you.” She replied, her voice slowing, as if she was getting more contemplative. And all over the place. She needed a stab of power before they went back out, because she was clearly spent from carrying silly heavy weights.
She sighed, looking at her hands.
“Weird isn’t it. Something falls out of the sky and here we are. Never asking, only receiving some of this insane shit. And choosing to do something with it like this.” She chuckled, her fingers crackling a little. “I wasn’t always like this, but here I am I guess.”
Perking up a little when LG started talking about her own origins, Alaine shifted in place a little as she listened. She would’ve gone and leaned against the wall as well, though she didn’t like the idea of leaning on that left shoulder. Besides, she could see Lightning Girl’s face better, standing somewhat across from her. She liked being able to read the other heroine’s expressions without the mask.
She was happy to breeze past the comment about how quickly she’d gotten into it all, herself. Maybe that had been a bit iffy of her to mention… It really was kind of suspicious that she’d only been at it all for two years, give or take, and had already gotten a suit – two, technically – and a job at SDN. That was all John’s doing, of course… Alaine could only hope everyone just assumed she’d somehow done it herself. The one thing he’d made sure she knew was that, if anyone asked, he didn’t exist.
Alaine kept her mouth shut on the topic of not being in control, thinking it probably wasn’t a good idea to mention that she wasn’t entirely sure she was in control herself, actually. Definitely wouldn’t be smart to mention she’d nearly flung a cosmic blade at Lightning Girl during the clown fighting, either.
A pained smile slipped across her face briefly at the mention of a “call to the void”. God, if LG only knew.
“...Huh. You’ve been calling Asteroid my doppleganger, but it sounds like we’re some sort of cosmic sisters with that origin story,” Alaine mused, her smile softening into something a little more genuine, a little more at ease. “Weirdly similar… I never saw any fragments of whatever hit me, though. If something did hit me. I’m just kind of assuming.”
For all she knew, the darn thing was embedded inside her somewhere. She hadn’t been to a doctor or gotten an X-Ray since it had happened and she wasn’t about to, so it’d probably just be a mystery forever as far as she was concerned.
Alaine squirmed just a little, a subconscious movement when Lightning Girl mused about wondering how the astral stuff had affected her.
“Yeah,” she huffed out a faint laugh, amused by LG’s phrasing at the end. “I guess.”
She hesitated a second, internally debating, before piping up again. Gesturing at the white-haired heroine with one gloved finger, she asked slowly, “So, you’re… you’re having to consciously control all that energy, all the time? Does it ever – I mean, if you don’t mind me asking – does it ever, sort of…”
Ah, how to describe it. Alaine frowned a little as she tried to figure out how to word it. “I don’t know. Does it ever drive you crazy?”
Sophie gave a rare sigh, almost as if suddenly, Alaine had found a corner of the armour that she hadn’t been wearing up. Like nobody asked that question the way a hero did. James had, doctors, family, anyone who realised she had that power in her veins. But it was like nobody had actually come in that close.
But in a strange way, through her own pain, Sophie hoped Blackstar might understand her own. Fear less. Worry less. Understand this was a shared experience. And one maybe she was a few years beyond in this process.
She sat down and leaned against the wall, legs sprawled out as she looked up. “When I go home, I just push all of what’s inside me into an earthing point. The static pours out of me without much drama. It’s why I don’t shock people when I’m not like this, and I guess, I got used to it. But when I do, I push out all of the energy that makes me…..well, larger than the sum of my parts. It’s the same when I’m spent. Or if I really, really throw a lot of power at something. Like I nearly did at Tsunami. It just….goes to ground. Being maximalist is easy when you’re wired up with more energy than you know what to do with.” She began, sighing, shaking her head.
“Then once it goes, I’m normal. At least until my body starts creating current on its own, it’s like how your nervous system produces bioelectricity, except, it seems to do that on a much, much quicker scale. Like everything about me. So as long as I ground myself regularly, I’m fine. Moment I don’t, I naturally build up to enough electricity to taze most people on contact. Which was a problem until I realised I had to put effort into grounding. But that’s not the worst of it.” She continued, looking right at Alaine, chuckling, shaking her head. Revealing her neck, and her hair, and the bits that her collar would have covered- going down to the top of her back where a braid of river-like lichtenburg scars seemed to foam like a delta.
“I’ve lost all the colour in my hair, got scars all over, and my body metabolises in a way that makes no sense. The more I sit here working out, the more my body seems to be able to take without making me want to pass out when I’m throwing bolts, because it’s like it’s transferring from a battery to a circuit I can make with anything I focus on, whenever I want. And everything else. But it’s constantly a fight because the moment I stop physically working, my body’s capacity to that is limited. My energy I can control when it’s close in. But electricity as a force is wild, untamed, and it doesn’t pick what it goes to when everything’s a resistor, Blackstar, it will find the easiest path when it wants. It doesn’t drive me crazy. It just means I have to be a lot of different people and wear the same face. The mask is a divider.” She breathed, shaking her head. Trying to think how to explain it.
“It’s like…..when the power’s in, it’s vivid. I can see colour, it’s like synesthesia. Makes me feel like I’m more alive, so much more……substantive. Like every part of me, amplifies up. What you’re seeing is who I am, just turned up to a thousand. Like I can think faster but get to the same ending I would normally. When I’m not, I’m like anyone else. And while I want to be Sophie, I suppose I can’t be her if I’m moving this quickly..” She mused, taking a bottle of water from the side. Exhaling. A name drop too. Not that at this point it felt like Lightning Girl had much left to hide.
Well, shit. She hadn’t expected to dump that out.
“I guess I didn’t have a choice. I end up being this thing and doing good with it, or……and, you have to admit, electricity is a hell of a fucking villain power. I mean come on, if you could do this, you’d find a way to scare kids.” She shocked a nearby pipe with a bolt, her usual party trick, a flash near blinding but enough to prove the point. “So yeah. Fun.” Sophie shook her head, sipping a little more water away, thinking back to Alaine’s earlier comment.
“Maybe we’re more similar, you’re right. Sisters. Hah. Maybe. Asteroid, Comet, same big unknown rock that makes us……superhuman I guess. But if it’s any advice from me….all of this gets better. You have to find what works for you. It’s a blessing and a curse. It doesn’t matter where it comes from, I think, just remember that if you can do good, inspire people, then you’re doing more than most with what you’ve been given. But make it work for you so you can live with yourself. Don’t fight it all the way. And don’t let it run you over. Find peace with it. It’ll never get easier. But you can make yourself stronger, Blackstar.” She shook her head, chuckling. “I guess I’m just what people want to see me as. White hair meant white costume. Besides. Yellow was taken by Wasp-Man in Manchester. Yes. It is that dumb.” She shook her head, sipping water down, sighing.
“Sorry. No easy answer to if it drives me crazy or not as I don’t know any different. But, silver lining, I have always got your back if your phone needs charging.” She chuckled, giving a double finger guns, and a wink, making her laugh through her trauma dump a little more.
Alaine tilted her head, listening with a thoughtful expression on what was visible of her face. She hadn’t expected so much information. But, as someone who enjoyed knowing things – she wasn’t complaining. Besides, it was nice to learn more about LG. Despite the fact that they were talking about the superpowers that made them something beyond human – it humanized the white-haired heroine.
Sophie. Alaine blinked. Had LG meant to tell her that? Or had it just slipped out, like she’d let her own name slip with Jet? She didn’t say anything for the moment, not wanting to interrupt.
Lightning Girl – Sophie – said she supposed she hadn’t had a choice. Alaine wondered how many heroes ever had.
She studied the lichtenburg scars peeking out from under the other heroine’s collar, finding it odd that Sophie’s powers had come from some cosmic fragment, yet ended up making her look like she’d been struck by lightning. That would’ve been Alaine’s guess, honestly, if someone had asked her how she thought LG got her powers – a lightning strike, or some kind of crazy storm.
The fact she’d gained her explosive powers from some comet fragment made Alaine wonder just how much about the cosmos there was yet to know – for herself, and for humanity as a whole.
All of this gets better. Alaine’s pale eyes shifted upward, watching Sophie’s unmasked face again as the white-haired heroine went on. Inspiring, just like she always seemed to be. Alaine thought that was probably just who Sophie was.
And she did feel inspired, there was just… something… off. Not with Sophie or what she was saying – more like something off in Alaine’s own chest. Like she wanted to say “yeah, I can do that!”, but something in her, deep down, knew she couldn’t. Or knew, at least, that she’d messed up too big already to ever be able to live with herself.
Alaine swallowed, keeping the thought a thought for the time being rather than vocalizing it. “...Yellow, huh?” She grinned slightly. “That’d definitely look good with the white hair. Most colors would, actually.”
She fiddled absent-mindedly with her black-gloved hands, adding in amusement, “If you do ever feel like going bad guy, though, give me a heads up so I can conveniently retire.”
Lightning Girl as a villain would kick her ass, probably immediately. Alaine didn’t fancy getting toasted.
She hesitated briefly then, finally, moved a little closer and carefully lowered herself to sit on the mat nearby. Not leaning up against the wall, but still a friendly distance. Alaine crossed her legs, now fiddling absently with the top of one of her boots as she spoke again.
“And, uh… thank you. For the encouragement. And the advice. I know I’ve just kind of been standing there whenever you’ve talked to me about this hero stuff, but… I just…” She shrugged honestly. “I don’t know what to say. I’m not exactly great with words. But–”
She glanced over at Sophie. The black lenses of her mask hid her eyes, but she hoped the white-haired woman could feel her appreciation anyway. “–Thank you, Sophie, I mean it. I really appreciate it. …Finding peace with, um… whatever’s…” She made a vague motion at herself, indicating her powers. “...That might be harder said than done, but I’m trying.”
Her hand dropped, briefly sinking to rest over her ribs before she shifted it away and went back to tapping at the side of her boot.
She wanted to say more. But she knew what would happen if she did – or at least she convinced herself she knew.
Alaine shook her head a little. “...The scars are cool, by the way. I’m assuming that came from the comet and not you accidentally lightning-striking yourself?” She paused, frowning curiously. “Can you even zap yourself?”
Sophie chuckled, shaking her head. It didn’t quite work like that, but, from someone that wasn’t in her shoes, who she was showing this all to, the inner workings of the thing that had transformed her life from just some regular girl into this woman that now had the ability to put a quick end to anyone she came into contact with, and the ability to fly.
“Uhhhh, not quite. Yeah, the scars were from the comet. Not from shocking myself, but I guess it’s because my skin is all a conductor. I mean, when I do this…” She stood up and walked across to the cable tucked out of the way, and yoinked on it, realising it was probably time to get back upstairs soon and go. Visible was better than anything, the high voltage, three phase cable an industrial one someone had routed through here and LG had managed to….splice for her own supply. Matt got a solid supply of tea if he didn’t report it to building management.
With cable in hand, she shoved it against her side and suddenly animated, eyes turning white, a faint halo and the smell of ozone erupting, as she then threw it back down, having drawn enough in. She tucked it out of the way and placed a rubber cap on the end as she’d botched it before, knowing full well that if that hit Blackstar, it would probably hurl her across the room. If it hit her heart, it would kill her. On an Alternating Current, the electricity would normally hurl someone away- particularly a high voltage, three phase supply that was designed to make sure an entire building got power, not just a house.
“That is a bit better. So now, I’m very, very live compared to before..”
She walked across, sitting back down on the mat it as she thought back to the earlier comments. The scars from all of this were a painful reminder. Sophie didn’t see it as pretty, so she found it amusing that someone else looked past her face and found it to be neat.
She’s trying to be sweet, Sophie, because she’s clearly scared of letting you down.
Scared? She wasn’t sure but like Felix, maybe just shy. But something was certainly up. Like Blackstar had something inside of her she wasn’t sure if she wanted to show. She was new, so maybe she was scared of making mistakes. Or showing something she didn’t want to. It was understandable, everyone had that fear, but even so, if Lightning Girl’s face was on the side of a bus, she was billed up as this premier heroine, why did it feel like even without the suit, without the mask, there was still that inertia inside the dark-haired heroine opposite her?
Maybe like Felix, eventually, she’d loosen her hair a little with time. But then again, Sophie knew that if the mask hadn’t slipped when she was at the carnival, maybe she’d have been a little tighter with things too herself.
“All you can do is try, Blackstar. That’s what being a hero is about. Doing the best we can. If you like, I can mentor you a little. But, I can help you. Even if I can’t sometimes help myself get things wrong. That’s what friends are for. But I think you’re already going to kick my ass because you’re good at this work already. So don’t worry, I wouldn’t want to be bad because I know you’d absolutely mess my day up.” She smiled, and laughed, reassuring, knowing it wasn’t going to help, but Blackstar needed a softer approach. Someone to gently pull her in, and well, give her a bit of a mentor.
“Though maybe don’t mention my name to anyone else. I don’t mind work and personal mixing but maybe not just yet.” She chuckled, shaking her head, Sophie knowing that it was an accident about the name, but the genie was firmly out of the bottle. She was tempted to ask about where Blackstar came from, given the accent, and it definitely wasn’t local. Talk about something else. But she wasn’t comfortable talking given that meant James would be brought up. And again, whilst it was a secret that was going to eventually spill, ideally when one of them left, she’d rather not talk about it given she was a professional. And did not want to give up any ideas that he had any bias towards her. Which he didn’t. Right?
She shrugged, looking to the horizon, then back at Blackstar. “I wonder……the dark energy blades on your arms, how did you find out you could use them that way? Sorry, I guess I never met another heroine that had cosmic powers. Same with Asteroid, actually. I mean, dark energy seems like it could be volatile. People can barely find it in a particle accelerator. And you seem to make it stick to you. How does it feel?” She asked, looking to Blackstar’s arms. “Have you tried doing anything else with the dark matter? Like the blades are cool, but I wonder what else you could do. I heard it’s like anti-gravity. Literally a force like it wants to spit out how we see reality whole.” Almost more out of curiosity, or at the least, to get her thinking about it. The power was relatively new- and Sophie hadn’t been able to fly until a few years in. She hadn’t been able to use an EMP-like blast until the last few, requiring a hell of a lot of energy to just smash bulbs and make circuits overload by making it all eyes on her. At the carnival, she had given it a small try, but even she wondered what was possible. Who knew what Blackstar could do, as a teeny bit of Sophie’s dorkery began to emit, the bit of her that James’s influence had absolutely crept it on.
Alaine had jumped a little when Lightning Girl shocked herself – or, rather, to be more accurate: sucked in electricity from that cable she’d noticed earlier. It made her look like some kind of angel for a second, all glowy and vibrant. Her eyes glowed but it looked warm, at least to Alaine. Not the cold, smoking light from her own eyes when she was invested in her powers, which just looked… otherworldly. Again, at least in her own opinion.
Sophie’s powers, although cosmically-induced, seemed comfortingly terrestrial. Alaine wasn’t sure where Jet’s powers had come from – she should ask – but even with his spacey theme, it felt similar to Lightning Girl in that it was familiar. They were all familiar with gravity, they’d all seen lightning, the science behind both was well-known and stuff you learned in grade school.
But her? She was foreign, even to herself.
Briefly tugged into memories of dreams or nightmares she’d been having since it all started, Alaine was pulled from her reverie as Sophie came back over, sinking back to the mat again while shimmering faintly like the sunlight in the high atmosphere.
She managed a lopsided little grin as the other heroine assured her the ass-kicking situation was the other way around, and Alaine shrugged slightly. “Well, I’ll take all the help I can get.”
At the mention of not spilling the white-haired heroine’s name Alaine was quick to nod, expression briefly turning serious again. “Nobody keeps a secret better than me,” she returned, remembering last second to smile and bob her head light-heartedly; that said, there was something almost eerily somber in her tone, like she wasn’t kidding at all.
Despite her attempts to look casual, LG’s next question made Alaine freeze for a beat. Like someone in an interrogation room who’d just been told that one critical piece of evidence had been found.
She swallowed thickly, reminding herself to breathe as Lightning Girl went on, musing about the dark energy Blackstar used with a curious tone.
…The dark energy blades on your arms, how did you find out you could use them that way?
She could see it in her head, as clear and sharp as if it had happened right before she walked into the gym.
Stumbling along in the early morning hours, feeling like she’d been asleep for three days straight, the rising sun stinging her eyes. Some kind of foreign drone in her head, in her blood, an odd tugging sensation in her veins, heavy confusion. A silhouette at the end of the alley, concerned eyes and wrinkled hands reaching out to help. Her own shaky hands reaching out in return, scared, desperate–
“...It just – happened.” Alaine cleared her throat, realizing her voice sounded a bit strained. She looked down at her lap, avoiding looking at LG as the fidgeting returned full-force. “I wasn’t trying to do it.”
The way she said it was less like someone recalling a memory and more like someone pleading to be believed.
She cleared her throat again, like that would help. Blinked quickly several times under her mask, trying to will away the inevitable twinkling in the corners of her vision that rose at the memories.
“It’s not sticking to me exactly, it’s… it’s inside me. It’s less like it’s sticking to me and more like it’s just… manifesting.” She remembered trying to explain it to John once, a few months ago. She hadn’t been able to describe it very well then, and as this was the second time she was attempting it, she doubted she’d do any better. Especially since it wasn’t like she understood it herself.
As for how it felt? She really didn’t know how to answer that, so for the moment she skipped to the next inquiry. “I haven’t really tried to do anything else with it, no.” The next admission slipped out without her pre-considered approval, and was more of a sullen mumble. “...All it does is destroy things.”
What was the point of experimenting? Learning new ways to kill and maim people? Alaine had enough on her conscience.
She took a breath, remembering that time to keep it short and not expand her lungs so much that it bothered her rib. “As for, uh… how it feels…” She trailed off, debating it mentally. “It’s… like…”
Her fingers flexed absently. “...It’s like a lot of things,” she said finally, though she knew that wasn’t very illustrative. “It takes anything I feel and runs with it. Especially the closer I let it get. I see them all the time, they’re always screaming something at me.”
Alaine blinked, feeling her face go a little warm as she realized that probably sounded more than a little crazy. “The, um. The stars, I mean.”
Ah, now she really felt stupid. Stars didn’t talk. Sophie was going to think she was insane and hearing voices.
Maybe she was, though.
“It’s like Jekyll and Hyde,” she tacked on, although that felt lame and still like the wrong comparison. Her powers weren’t some separate entity in her head, like she wanted to believe they were. When she did horrible things, there wasn’t anyone else pulling the strings in her mind. She was still fully present the whole time, if a little overwhelmed.
That was what made it so awful.
“Okay, well, not exactly. It’s just… it’s just like there’s something there, besides me – but it is me. It’s in my blood, I feel it there. It’s there now, tugging. It tugs. Upwards, usually. That feeling helped me figure out I could fly, but, at the same time, it’s – disorienting. Stars are…”
Alaine bit the inside of her cheek for a second. “...Violent.”
She was still avoiding looking directly at Sophie. “I, uh – I’m sorry, I know that doesn’t make a lot of sense. It’s hard to explain in human words.” You are human, idiot. “I mean you understand it better when you’re… it. Stars feel more than they talk.” Wow, that was such a normal human thing to say.
Memories of her dreams prodded at the back of her mind, scenes of floating in the endless cosmos and feeling like she was supposed to be a star, but wasn’t. It was an odd mirror of what she felt like there, a lot of the time – like she was supposed to be a human but… wasn’t. Not quite.
It was stressing her out. Sitting on the floor like that was making her think of sitting in her apartment, and her rib was really starting to protest the position – especially as her breathing started to quicken slightly.
The constant stars twinkled like looming, brilliant vultures and she winced, feeling that cosmic energy starting to prickle in her veins. She was going to start spiraling again. A star without an orbit.
“I need to find J–” Alaine started abruptly, only to swiftly correct herself mid-name. “--ames. J…ames. James. I think I forgot to fill in my timesheet for yesterday.”
Guilt stabbed at her chest for lying to Sophie, even if it wasn’t like it was a really important lie. She didn’t need James, she needed Jet. She felt like a pathetic little cosmic leech, spending that past week of work reaching for that personal gravity of his whenever she’d started to lose it… which was way, way more than usual.
Dang it, she’d been doing so much better. She never used to get those stupid panic attacks when she was younger, and then it had been so, so bad after Arizona. She’d been getting better, especially over the past year, but last Thursday seemed to have majorly set her back. She could only hope it was just a temporary thing and wouldn’t take as long as last time to get better.
Jet helped. He didn’t know it, but he did – and she couldn’t help it. She hadn’t had him last time, she hadn’t had anyone. It had been horrible. She didn’t want to feel like that again.
“We should probably get moving, anyway,” she added, trying to sound casual and not move too fast as she carefully got to her feet again. “I’m sure we’ll be getting a debrief here before long.”
She hesitated, then offered Lightning Girl a black-gloved hand to help her up. She realized a second too late that might be tricky with all the electricity the other heroine had just sucked in, but she wasn’t about to pull her hand back then.
“And – I mean it, really,” she added, looking sincerely at Sophie. “Thank you. For all the support and advice, it’s… it’s nice. It really means a lot to me.”
Sophie reached across to where her gym bag was, and scooped one of her gloves on, before crawling over and taking her hand. In what would have seemed a bit of an awkward pause, but one that she knew was probably best. Safety first, Blackstar!
She took the hand and clambered up, nodding as she reached over and grabbed the bag, hucking it over her shoulder. “Yeah, we should probably get moving. And don’t worry about it. It’s what heroes do, Blackstar.” She winked, giggling a little, pointing to the changing rooms, knowing she had to get dressed and return back to costume. “Right, I need to go get changed. Catch you later, alligator.” Sophie smiled, turning her head over her shoulder, her hair following as the white-clad heroine thought to finish up their earlier chat.
“And don’t worry about explaining it either. We also wouldn’t be superhuman if there wasn’t something odd about us.” Sophie smiled, trying to pass off her reaction to earlier, before splitting away.
Blackstar was still nervous, Sophie thought. Like really, really nervous. Had Sophie poked something inside her, deeper than maybe she should have. Was it something she was trying to hide? And if so, how bad could it possibly be? All heroes had issues, fuck, half the team were Phoenix Programme, actual, legit, criminals? So what had she done that she was so worried about? Was it impressing people, or was it she’d gone around mass murdering as a hobby? Or worse? Sophie didn’t know. And couldn’t, but something sat with her, but heading into a booth, she sighed, thinking that today was the last day of the week, but man, it was a half day and yet all paid. And she’d get to meet Quickdraw. And she’d get to finally go to Hollywood. Not as a tourist, but as a heroine. Though she wasn’t sure how the others may react to that.
Alaine started grinning a little in spite of herself at the brief pause between her extending her hand and Sophie taking it – though she did appreciate the effort taken to avoid a workplace accident form.
She huffed in faint amusement at that last comment, though she thought it was more like something was wrong with her than just “odd”. Still, she also appreciated the easy way LG handled it – not pressuring, not making Alaine feel like she was being interrogated. Sophie seemed good at that.
“Right. In a while, crocodile,” Alaine returned naturally, momentarily reminded of parting ways with her sisters and how it almost always ended in some silly phrase like that. She shook the nostalgia off. “Good luck with your dispatches today.”
With one last glance after the white-haired heroine, Alaine took a breath and turned to head back upstairs.
Upon arriving at the breakroom on her own, having left LG to change out of her gym set and back into her suit, Blackstar perched herself next to Asteroid immediately. Whether he was already there or she had to wait for him to arrive, he'd find her coming to sit next to him either way.
While James microwaved his hamburger -- a sad state for a hamburger to be in -- and Lightning Girl eventually arrived to debate the healthiness of it, Alaine quietly pulled her backpack around to her lap and dug around for a moment before finding what she was looking for. Producing a red and black teddy, she gently set it on the breakroom table in front of Asteroid.
"Lightning Girl found our stash," she explained, trying to sound casual about it.
Not like, upon receiving the recovered tote bag the other day, she'd had her first non-essential outing in probably a year to go get all the stuffed animals cleaned up and given a little something extra. The cute bow collar for LG's puppy -- and some extra stuffing for the red and black bear, who was also now wearing a light gold chain. It wasn't an actual expensive chain, just the sort of thing used for jewelry-making, but it looked enough like the one Jet had been wearing at the bar the previous week. She'd had to call Grace to figure out where to purchase such an item, as well as get her younger sister to walk her through how to do the stuffing and stitching. She may or may not have had a bandaid or two on under her gloves, due to her extreme rustiness with using a needle.
Alaine knew she could've just left the bear at Jet's locker, like she had with the fish food, and he'd probably have to go drop it off at his locker before dispatches anyway -- but she'd wanted to actually give it to him.
She adjusted the chain around the teddy's neck then sat back, tossing Asteroid a small grin. "Better take good care of him or I'll take you to court for custody."
"Alright everyone, we're on for half a shift today. As I'm sure you all know, the SDN LA County Annual Gala got moved.....again.....to today, at 6pm, and we are all invited. Be back here for 5:30 and dress formally, as per the Slack message. No flying, because you're getting a limo to pick you up."
The SDN LA County Annual Gala. Aw, shoot. She'd forgotten about that -- and hadn't actually thought she'd need to remember, because she hadn't expected she'd be invited. Probably would've helped her mentally if she'd checked Slack like he mentioned...
When James looked around at his A-Team she managed a strained smile and a double-thumbs up, trying not to look like he'd just announced the worst thing ever. Dress formally. How was she supposed to do that? Wear the one t-shirt and jeans she'd just washed the blood out of? Oh God. She'd have to call John.
Or -- no, scratch that. She was a little nervous about calling John at the moment. During the week she'd received a text from him on her second phone, which had turned into a call that nearly made her melt through the floor with anxiety. Lots of warnings about how similar the clown carnage looked to the cartel incident, questions about why she'd done it, how -- trying to make sure she was in control of it and not the other way around, which she'd struggled to answer.
All in all, he'd seemed a touch tense with her. She'd been left feeling like a scolded dog. Calling him up to ask if he could produce her some formal attire in a couple of hours felt like a bad idea.
Plus, she was so... picky. It was why her mom had given up trying to go clothes-shopping with her when she was probably fourteen. There was no way John would be able to find something, first try and on such short notice, that she'd be able to stand wearing for a couple of hours. No, she'd just have to figure it out on her own.
Before she started getting too upset about the situation, Blackstar swiveled her attention to other things. Like Lightning Girl producing yarn and crochet hooks to start working on something pink and grey. The amount of times she'd seen Grace sitting around, crocheting away with a huge bag full of yarn sat next to her... For a split second, she could almost imagine that was Grace sitting over there, not so far away at all.
But she blinked and the vision was gone, leaving Lightning Girl with her half-finished project. Alaine let out a quiet breath and fiddled with the straps of her backpack in her lap. She might've tried for a little light conversation with the others while they waited for the first of their dispatches to come rolling in, but she felt like she'd used up her conversation battery for the day with Lightning Girl down in the gym, at least for the time being. Instead she leaned back in her seat, stifling a yawn and stretching out her legs to rest a bit in the meantime with Asteroid's calming gravity next to her. Even a few minutes of "resting" was relieving after the monumental lack of sleep she'd had so far that week.
1x Thank



