Hidden 5 days ago 3 days ago Post by TheGrundlesnart
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TheGrundlesnart Snarting Grundles since 1838

Member Seen 41 min ago


_ Hungry For More
_ Sluggish
X Satiated

Hello mortals, and welcome to my cavern. You're probably wondering why I'm speaking like this and what the fuck it is I want from you.

I want RPs. Duh.
Was there even a question about it? Look at what forum this is!
If you're not here for that, you're in the wrong place.


Let us begin with my

with me, anyways

The First Precept

I am a upper-casual - low advanced RPer. I'm a wee bit rusty and I'm new to this forum and its particulars, but I've been in the RP game for 15 damn years so if I still suck at it what the hell am I even doing? Therefore, I don't suck at it. Convincing argument, eh?

I will post as much as I'm able. This may mean multiple posts per day, or maybe just one. Most of my posting is from Mobile rather than computer, so please bear that in mind when considering length. My poor widdle thumbs get tired, ok? But I should produce a solid 3 paragraphs for most posts, even at my fast pace. Considering that I'm posting almost exclusively from devices not made for longform typing to any degree, I think that's reasonable. I expect that my partners perform similarly. I'm not going to crucify you if our characters are speaking quietly in a calm location and things tail off, length-wise. That's fine. Not every line of dialogue in a novel is accompanied with a fuckin' 3 paragraph description. It's fine. But it should be rare.

The Second Precept

My romances are at a medium-slow burn. I don't want it to take ages, but I also don't want them to gaze upon each other and instantly tear their clothes off and have at it like bunnies on viagra. I'm totally fine with smexy scenes, and I'm fine with fading to black. Casual gore is fine. If you wanna write incredible detail about each individual bone and sinew being torn asunder and go on long tirades about the guts and blood... you need a therapist. And probably someone else to RP with. Weirdly, little bits of body horror I'm fairly ok with. Just don't go fuckin' nuts. Then again horror will be fairly rare. I'm looking for pairings of:
MxF (me as male in this case)
MxM (but only one very particular circumstance, which you'll have to PM me for.)
I'm also into other stuff but you'll have to ask me via PM.

With all this being said, YOU MUST BE 18+ TO RP WITH ME. I'm an old fart. So maturity is a plus, so as not to fuss with my old fart sensibilities.

The Third Precept

If you're cool with me, I'm cool with you. Just be upfront about stuff and don't go beating around the bush. If you think I'm a dick, that's justifiable. Just let me know. Shit happens. I probably won't eat you and burn your village to ashes. Probably.

The Fourth Precept

Most of my RPs are based in Settings. This means that I have a world/galaxy/universe/multiverse that is partially pre-prepared. Most of these are basically just bundles of aesthetic features rather than fully fleshed-out worlds. What this means is:
You can add stuff to them. Really. It's ok. I'm not gonna pitch a bitch fit over it. So long as it's consistent with the aesthetic, you're golden. (ie, if it's a Weird West setting, please don't try to add lasergun-toting space aliens. Wrong setting.)

The Fifth Precept

You don't need a fancy-ass character sheet. A name, age, sex, gender, brief little description of their appearance, wants, needs, and challenges. It shouldn't take you long. I like having characters build over time, so little CS's are just peachy for my purposes.

The Sixth Precept

This is the Don't Be A Dick clause.
Don't godmod. That's being a dick.
Don't steal control if you've got no narrative-based reason to do so. That's being a dick.
Don't go nuclear if things turn out poorly. That's being a dick.
Don't go spreading shit if the RP doesn't work out. That's being a dick.
Don't make a mary sue. That's... not technically being a dick but it's also no fun. (unless we're doing some kind of weird Mary Sue fight for the giggles, in which case whatever.)

The Seventh Precept

If I've missed anything, just PM me.
If you have a question, just PM me.
If you want to RP with me, just PM me.
If you want to have my babies, just PM me.
If you are so unbelievably turned on by the monstrous amount of sass in this post that you just NEED some hot lovin' right this very damn second, just PM me.

Here's the genres/aesthetics that tickle my pickle. The more +'s, the more it pickle-tickles.:
+Science-fantasy (see Tyr below for example)
+++Modern Fantasy (Specifically the Witch's Closet, see below.)
++Weird West (western, but with WIZARDS N' SHIT)
+Raygun Gothic
+Modern Romance (Just straight-up nowadays is OK, too.)

Here are the settings I'd like to RP in. We can discuss a plot once we're decided on the setting. Some example plots are included. All of these tickle my pickle, but The Witch's Closet is ticklin' something FIERCE.

Pairings I find interesting, to be used in any of the above, so long as they make sense:
Soldiers/Officers of opposing forces
A Hero/A Villain (doubly so when their alter egos are dating and don't know they're enemies. Yum.)
Royalty/Literally just some asshole
Monstergirl/monster slayer
monstergirl/ wandering merchant
monstergirl/ wandering nomad
Devil/human (Especially in Witch's Closet)

That's about it.

As said above, PM me, don't post here. If you post here, I know you didn't read JACK SHIT of what I wrote above, and I'll mock you for not knowing how to read. You've been warned, whether you read the warning or not.
Hidden 5 days ago Post by TheGrundlesnart
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TheGrundlesnart Snarting Grundles since 1838

Member Seen 41 min ago

It's been 4 hours. Time to BUMP.
Hidden 3 days ago Post by TheGrundlesnart
Avatar of TheGrundlesnart

TheGrundlesnart Snarting Grundles since 1838

Member Seen 41 min ago

I got a shitload of interest, so I'm closing down until some of the heat dies down.

Thanks everyone!
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