BrokenPromise

March of the White Rabbit: A Roll-Your-Own Magical Girl Roleplay

”Everyone’s favorite Billionare.“

— Mark “Zuck the Succ” Zuckberg

Zuck the Succ

05 05 05 05 05
05 05 05 05 05
41/08 | Billionaire/Lizzardman | Money
Data scraper | Power of Wealth, Lizard Eye | Horror (Meta)
Fraying Sanity, Big Damn Villain, AI Companion, A Literal Neighborhood, Witchcraft
Insatiable Desire, Soulless | Lizard physiology, Syn Drive

245.4B US Dollars

After his interaction with Ani, he returned to the arena where Charlotte and Mimi fought. Though the girls had departed, and only Pickles was there now. He looked up at the balcony.

”Are you happy now?” The Puchuu’s voice was as pained as it was irritated. ”Will I have my base now, after everything my girls gave for this twisted experiment?”

”Of course.“ He never understood Puchuu. Everything he had heard about them made them sound like pragmatic and shrewd fellows, but every single one treated him like a heartless monster. Did even the puchuu think he lacked humanity? ”But I’m sure there’s more you could use….“

Disclaimer: Nothing happens. This is just here to present all the art I forgot to post last time. Something interesting might happen next time.

---

”It’s… *Yawn... My Ex.”

— Chloe Irving

Chloe Irving

03 03 03 03 03
10 10 06 17 04
23/12 | Babe/Baby | Spirit
Mystic orb, Gauntlets | Third Eye, Tentacles | Horror
Wings, Enhanced Outfit, Big Damn Hero, Blood Magic, Interdimensional Home, Sorcery, Enhanced Transformation
Dominator | Dark Weapon
Nagash

6 Gold, 9 silver, 13 bronze

Chloe wasn’t too amused with the lightbulbs. She had, after all, practically chosen this form because it was exactly what she wanted. To be tall and thin and nothing like a bimbo. So being likened to a cutting board was hardly an insult she’d take seriously. There wasn’t even a need to interject, as the "good one" helpfully pointed out how idiotic the statement was.

Any fun that could be had was suddenly cut short by the arrival of Penny’s drones, and the continued entitled air around the beacon girls. No, the Ascendancy was somehow even less fun than they were.

"If saving Penrose is a crime, I’ll gladly fill out my sentence." She waved her hand over her minions. "And I’ve been combating the influence of horrors before you showed up. Besides, I already know where the Queen and Mariette are."

She presented her orb to Tsuki, showing a glimpse of their whereabouts, before retracting the orb again. At that point it became foggy again.

"But if you want to know where they are, well, I’d need some sort of deal." She pretended to think. "You’re a little flat, but why don’t we go on a date when this is all over? It’ll give me something to do when I’m rotting away in a cell."

---

“Got a pillow?”

“*Is sleeping on mommy*”

— Su Fang & Mika Sarraf

Hider

Age: 50(?)/13 | Gender: Female/Female | Air | Uniform
Fists | Focused assault, Power of Friendship, Dread wings, Avenger | Boteg
Hammerspace handbag, Enhanced Transformation, Enhanced Outfit, Overcity Shift, Sorcery, Gifted, Ally(Mika)
Focused, Subtle, Mana font, Mental link, Mystic might, Former Familiar | Limited, Alien mind, Paranoid, Vendetta, Former Familiar
Dragon Scale Pendant, Ether staff

STR: 03 | AGI: 05 | VIT: 03 | MAG: 07 | LCK: 04

STR: 04 | AGI: 14 | VIT: 04 | MAG: 24 | LCK: 04

Age: 16/13 | Gender: Female/Female | Beast/Water | Skimpy
Body | Tentacles | Dan
Enhanced Outfit, Sorcery, Healing Artifact, Power artifact
Dan stuff, Dan stuff
Edgy Equips

STR: 05 | AGI: 05 | VIT: 04 | MAG: 06 | LCK: 04

STR: 09 | AGI: 08 | VIT: 08 | MAG: 09 | LCK: 04

Bottom Text

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"I’m okay."

— Suki Oyama

"Interesting play…" Misoka squared her shoulders as Michi’s show continued. She pressed her knees together and looked at Suki. "Tsubomi doesn’t look too comfortable up there."

"Nope."

"Isn’t that a concern? You guys hang out a lot, right?"

"It’s complicated."

Misoka folded her hands in her lap, twiddled her thumbs, and then set her hands on the table between them. "Is there a reason why you don’t like me, Suki?"

"Eh?" Suki looked away from the stage.

"I mean, you’ve hit on every girl in school. At least, a few months ago you had. Everyone but me."

"Well, I mean uh, you have a boyfriend, right?" Suki leaned back in her seat.

"Yes, but that hasn’t stopped you from asking others." Misoka looked away. "I don’t think it mattered if they were in existing relationships or were openly fantasised about boys. You’d ask them anyway."

"Uh, well I’m sitting with you now, right?"

"I’m not oblivious to the pranks you try to play on me. Any time there’s a smoking cigarette butt in my locker I know how it got there."

Suki lowered her head. "There are other people who smoke."

"Yet there are certain things you won’t do to me." Misoka returned her eyes to Suki. "When I was swimming with the swimming team, someone spotted you entering the locker room. When it was time to change back, you had stolen all of the girls underwear. Everyone but mine."

"I was uh, I was only collecting the pretty looking ones."

Misoka was sure most of the girls on the swim team had very normal, very unexciting underwear like herself. But it wasn’t a point worth bringing up. "Suki, Im, Hmmmm." She slid her hands together, like she was praying. "I’m not trying to call you out or anything. It’s apparent you aren’t feeling yourself. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you picked me out of everyone else because you wanted to punish yourself."

"Well-"

The honor student raised her hand. "It’s fine, Suki. I did put on the ribbon and held the silver fork like the others. We can talk as long as you like, but we could always do that, be it now or later. If you ask me though, judging by the number of ribbons around here, you probably have other people you need to talk to."

Suki looked back at the theater and sighed.

"Get your own chicken and poach it."

— Willow

"Who cares?" Willow’s eyes suddenly looked spaced out and distant. "Well, I mean, I do, big sis. And it would mean a lot to me if you did too."

Evil Eye sprinted past the apes in her way. The janitor began hooting and hollering and pointed, at which point more of the apes started to come out of the woodwork. They were invisible to the other students, who continued to watch the play as they hopped from table to table. They weren’t especially fast, and even the weakest magical girls were faster than the swiftest humans. It was not hard for Evil Eye to outpace them.

But when she got to the door leading to the hallway, there was a very large ape blocking the way. His head almost scraped the ceiling, and he was dressed like a mall cop without pants. He tipped his head back and folded his arms, white smoke rolled out of his nostrils.

Then a nightmare unicorn plowed into him.

Riding atop the steed was Willow, who let out a war cry as the doors to the hallway were flung open. "I kicked that kid’s ass last time, and I’ll do it again!" She pointed back at Evil Eye. "Don’t even think about stealing my chance to save Rei away from me, you harlot!"

The hallway was teaming with apes, some bigger and smaller than the rest, but the diabolical unicorn was clearing a path. Behind Evil Eye, the janitor was trying to catch up to her. Screeching and stabbing its finger in her direction.

It was clear that Willow wanted Evil Eye to stay back, but what Evil Eye had to decide was where she was most needed, or maybe a better question, where would Black Gate want her less?

"I’ve made my mind a sunless space."

— Black Gate

"How many times do I have to say it?" Michi groaned. "I’m not trying to hurt you. But when you bring up sensitive information, it’s hard not to comment on why you might have it." She wasn’t being quiet anymore. The people sitting closest to the stage were looking in her direction. "I don’t hate you, Hizuki. I could never hate someone who reminds me so much of my sister. Yet you upset me greatly, you bother me to no end, but that’s just because you’re so ignorant. My sister also believed in kindness. And-"

The twin comets closed in on Michi, but there were enough monkeys up on stage to intervene. Many of them dove onto Hotaru, who had been on stage and was the most obvious threat to intercept. They couldn’t contain her, but in slamming into her, she was knocked off target and careened directly into Hizuki.

The two tumbled through the air. This wouldn’t be the first time Shatterscape had attacked Hizuki, but it was noticeably weaker than last time. Though curiously, there was a lot more blood. It was wrapped around Hotaru’s gauntlet like a great tendril, and another one had coiled around Hizuki’s leg.

The two flew around in circles , with Oros the Joyful spinning along with them on the ground. She held them with her bloody lasso and tried to keep them from flying into the crowd while their momentum slowed.

But while the blood here was a relief to see, it wasn’t so on stage.

After Kiyo’s mad dash and Willow’s subsequent charge, there were no apes in position to stop Sylvia from rushing the stage. Michi turned just in time for Sylvia’s gauntlet to plunge into her stomach. She stumbled backwards a few steps, and her blood sprayed on the girl’s arm.

But Michi’s blood wasn’t red. It was black, like a shadow. It had no reflection of any kind. Sylvia’s arm was coated in the stuff and looked like it was fused to Michi. The blood was indistinguishable from the rest of the black on Michi’s body. Her hair, her clothes, her blood. Her face looked like a white mask floating in a sea of darkness.

A bead of black tar oozed out of the corner of Michi’s trembling lips. Her pale hand took hold of Sylvia’s arm. Despite suffering a mortal wound, her strength had not left her. Sylvia couldn’t retract her arm even if she wanted to. The golden threads on her fingers had disappeared as well, eaten by the black void before her. That wasn’t the only connection that had been eroded. She couldn’t feel a connection to her other bodies either. There were no links, she was trapped in this place.

Michi’s lips pulled back into a smile. Then her mouth seemed to grow as her smile became impossibly large. The corners of her lips went off the side of her face, and her eyes rolled up into her head. A white mask with completely white eyes. Eventually her lips parted to reveal her teeth. Clenched like the grin of a cheshire cat, but coated in that same inky darkness that made up her form. Her teeth parted as her mouth opened. The black void inside her mouth grew like a cancer, pushing her mouth open far wider than it should have been able to move. Eventually her face disappeared in the darkness and the two voids merged. There was no Michi to be seen, only darkness. And looking away didn’t help. All Sylvia could see was darkness.

Like when she closed her eyes before the beatings started.

---

The fashionable succubus was about to depart before the roof dwelling Shuuko stopped her. "Hiding? Here?" She pursed her lips. "I’m sorry, but they already found you." And with that, she disappeared in a shower of sparkles.

Suddenly, a black fist broke through the roof, gripping a series of multicolored lines in its fist, and with a ruthless twist, snapped all of them simultaneously.

---

"Is that part of the play? What the hell is going on!?"

The boy went ignored. Michi was standing on stage with a hand over her chest. To her left was Sylvia, who was locked inside a black gelatinous blob. No amount of struggling would grant her escape. Michi did not address this though, and continued the play.

"Tsubomi justified her actions because they had good outcomes in the short term."

What few remaining monkeys clamored around Roche. "Aw man, thanks Tsubomi! She’s back to her old self! I never thought she would walk again!"

"However." Michi wheezed. "There was a problem with ‘helping’ people this way. That drug was too potent. It had no adverse side effects on its own, but it made people feel too good. Demand was high, but supply was low, so people used less safe alternatives. It was a true gateway drug, and it turned many people into dysfunctional addicts. And where you have addicts, you’re going to have dealers and gangs. The sorts of people who are addicted to power." Some apes changed some of the set dressing. The disco ball was pulled out of the way and the backdrop was changed to something resembling a school hallway. It was even cruder than the last backdrop, somehow. "It was happening so fast that Norah and I hadn’t realized it was already all around us. That Saturday after we had our crepes, we went to school to pick up some of my books. But Norah suspected something was amiss. She hid me in a utility closet and waited."

Some strangely tall, human looking apes gathered around Ember. None of them looked friendly.

"They looked like the most average people in the world. From what I could tell this wasn’t the first time they had asked Norah to come with them. She refused to comply with them, but it didn’t really matter. These animals weren’t looking for her permission this time."

Hizuki, Hotaru, and Oros had slowed to a stop. The bloody tendrils immediately released the magical girls before things got weird. The three were disorientated, but in a position to act. Michi had turned towards Ember, but was looking over her shoulder. Her fingers were pressed together, ready to snap.

"Don’t look away, Hizuki. God knows I didn’t."

*Snap*

Ember and Sylvia had traded places. Only now Sylvia was untransformed and done up in the same over the top fashion as Ember had been. Worse, she found herself unable to transform. Worse still, was that the ape men converged on her. Two grabbed her arms, while a third one drove its fist into her stomach. Before she even had a chance to catch her breath, a fourth one kneed her in the ribs, then a fifth one brought the back of his hand across her face. The beatings continued, and they would not stop.

While the cafeteria looked on aghast, Michi watched the spectacle with downcast eyes, as if they were mere insects brutalizing each other.

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"You know nothing, Haruna Maeda."

— Black Gate

"No, I think most people are beyond helping with words." Michi answered Hizuki’s rhetorical question. That would be all she could get in before Haruna continued. The paladin was clearly agitated, despite what Tsubomi had done for her. Though she was able to prevent herself from getting too worked up before continuing her lecture. The mention of her innermost desires caused Michi’s brow to raise, if only briefly. "Ah, you know my desires too. Of course." A lazy smile crept across her face. "It must be useful to be able to understand others so easily." She placed a hand on her chest. "I can see what other people do, regardless of where it happens, but reading their innermost feelings or understanding why they do something is beyond my ability. Yet at the same time it’s so uncouth, isn’t it? You’re constantly looking at people’s most guarded secrets, like a voyeur." The corners of her lips curled into a scowl. "But what have you actually done with your gift? Have you made anyone happier?" She took a step towards the edge of the stage, with her foot partially off the edge. "Do you even know what it is that I want to destroy?"

---

The maids continued to remain unmoving, occasionally giving hints to what they were dreaming.

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"Oh this isn’t good."

— Suki Oyama

Suki watched Haruna as she explained herself. Misoka seemed a little surprised that Haruna’s mood had improved so quickly, but simply let her finish speaking. And once Haruna was done speaking, she departed.

"That was… So yes!" Misoka forced a smile and looked back at Suki. "There you have it! It was just a misunderstanding!"

"She was lying."

Misoka looked around. "I don’t think she was, she sounded very sincere."

"She’s a very good liar, and she only lies to make people feel better."

"Maybe. But everyone lies, Suki. I even tell lies like that." It did occur to Misoka that Suki usually avoided her at all costs. She had suspected that Suki was avoiding her because she tended to play pranks on people and just didn’t want to deal with one of her victims, but maybe there was something else at play here. "I know she was being truthful when she said she wanted to be your friend. But what’s this about you not being her biggest fan?"

"I don’t know." Suki groaned. "I mean she makes me feel a little uncomfortable sometimes, but I think I’ve been nice to her for the most part."

"Uncomfortable?"

"Yea." She looked up. "She reminds me of someone I used to know."

"Who were they?"

The delinquent hesitated. "Nobody you’d know."

Misoka pursed her lips. "What were they like?"

"A cyborg."

"E-excuse me."

"If you don’t mind, I kind of don’t want to talk about it anymore. It looks like a play started." Suki propped up her head with her hand.

"Oh, well, that’s fine." Reluctantly, Misoka turned to look at the play. "Is that Tsubomi up there?"

Suki didn’t answer.

Elsewhere, Evil Eye made a phone call. Likely to someone she never wanted to ask for help. Perhaps the stranger part was that she got a response.

"How’s the rest of my harem doing?"

— Rei Ishiko

"Evil Eye, Interesting." That was Schrade’s voice, and the echoes of steel could only be her scythe meeting with an equally powerful opponent. "One moment, I’m going to put you on speaker."

This was a lie.

Rei did not put herself on speaker, she started a video call and cast aside her phone. The angle was not especially flattering, with the shot mostly focused on the ceiling. But Evil Eye had seen the club room enough times to know that was where Rei was. There was just enough of a bookshelf in view with Suki’s manga spilling off the top shelf. Shrade leapt up into the air and gripped her scythe with both hands, then Black Gate slammed into her with her, brandishing a puppet in each hand.

It went without saying that there was something off here. The real question was if, and what, Evil Eye was going to do about it.

Once all the tears were cleaned up, the janitor monkeys looked up at Evil Eye. Possibly anticipating her next move, possibly reminding her that they were watching.

Next to an adjacent table, some of the students started to speak.

"Sooooooooo, unsurprisingly, it looks like Misoka got picked."

"Why did we even bother signing up again?" They both laughed.

"Maybe someone else will come along later."

"Huh."

"What?"

"Was there supposed to be a play?"

"I don’t think so. The theater club should still be rehearsing. Not to mention their props are a little bit better than that."

"Right. Wonder what it’s about."

"I mean, we could watch it."

"Yea, that was what I was implying."

"It looks spooky! Would you like to hold my hand?"

"...Sure."

"Here to make everything better."

— Willow

With Tsubomi being a square that didn’t wanna rough up anyone, Willow needed to find another avenue of excitement. Unfortunately, it looked like everything was being handled by someone, so she decided to peak over Evil Eye’s shoulder.

"Oh hey! Look at her go!" She looked away from the phone and at Evil Eye. "You know she was not that hard to fight when I got my hands on her. I think Rei might be slackin’!"

"Ask me the question."

— Black Gate

Michi gave the twins a nod once the bottle had been handed off, and then looked ahead. Of course Hizuki was there, threatening her. Any normal person would only see Michi scowling at the open air. Maybe that was why she chose to ignore her for now and focus on the students below. Yet she still had two magical girls up on stage, one of which just handed a bottle off to Tsubomi.

"I’m not summoning anything." She mumbled, just loud enough for Hizuki to hear. Then Michi lifted her head and spoke to the room. "Is everyone having a good day? Maybe you’ve had better, maybe you will have better, Maybe you don’t think today is good at all. I was told by a few people that they were not having a good day today, even though I worked hard to make today as good as I possibly could for them."

A girl sitting near the edge of the theater, one without a blue ribbon, looked up at Michi and smirked. "Is that why you look like a mop?" The joke was only "funny" enough to get her small clique of girls laughing. Tsubomi had done her best, but Michi had stopped her before she could be completely cleaned. "But seriously, who are you, and why should I care about some stupid play?"

While Michi looked reasonably agitated, her hate and desire to destroy was spreading across the room like a thick miasma. It practically choked out all other emotions in her vicinity. "You should care because you are a simple creature. You are ignorant of the world and what’s in it." Her eyes drifted away from the heckler. "This play is about my dear sister Norah, and what happened to her on a day like today."

The heckler was about to say something, but stopped when her chair was shoved into her table. When she turned to see who had bumped into her, there was a large gorilla in a suit and tie sitting behind her. She wisely chose not to say anything else.

"Our story starts on a Friday night. Most kids are planning sleepovers or going to stay up all night playing videogames, but not Norah. She plans to go to bed early so that she can wake up and do some extra studying. She also plans to go over my homework like she used to do before we were adopted. Also, it was our secret, but if I did good? We’d go to the bakery and get crepes early in the morning." She looked to Tsubomi. "Tsubomi was different too. She sold drugs to people. Not for the money, but because it made people happy."

On Tsubomi’s half of the stage, several ape extras hopped out from behind the shower curtains and landed around her. "Eyyyyyyyy!" one of them made gun fingers and pointed at her. "I hear ya got some ‘Miracles’ eh? Think ya could hook a brother up? Maybe a sistah?" Michi snapped her fingers, and Roche appeared on stage. She was still slumped in her chair. "My girl here could use a li’l TLC if ya know what I mean? Ah-heh-heh-HEH!"

With the play underway, Michi spoke to Hizuki in a hushed tone. "Why do you care so much about these sad sacks? Suki was asking for it, and I merely suggested we summon a giga miseria. Why are you assuming I’d do it in the school? Why does the detention club get a pass on everything!? Are you going to ask Roche to not throw food on people, or are threats of violence okay if it’s your friends are doing the bullying!?"

---

Aside from the snoring maids, all seemed to be quiet at the Tsukishima manor.

An Idiot's Dungeon Union

"What did I misssssssssssssss?"

-Salbjörg of the Deep

While the others reflected or did whatever it was they did, Salbjörg decided to make an appearance. She walked down the hall, completely ignored Zoppy, and found her way into the main kill room where it looked like a bomb had went off. Fortunately, many of the corpses had been devoured or were inside the pit where she didn’t have to look at them. Maybe having some vermin crawling around wasn’t entirely a bad thing. Yes, after today, she would need to re-evaluate her score for rats.

She gave the Oracle a respectful bow before ignoring everyone else and marching up to Kleine. After taking note of her worried state, she looked at the ghost, suspecting whatever happened had to be his fault. He was in charge of defenses while everyone else was out, at least she remembered. Given the chest was open, it was clear what the problem was.

Salbjörg emptied the contents of the priest’s brown bag into the the chest before pulling up a whiteboard that read “Fixed it.”

March of the White Rabbit: A Roll-Your-Own Magical Girl Roleplay

"The Zuck suck too muck."

— Mark "Zuck the Succ" Zuckberg

Zuck the Succ

05 05 05 05 05
05 05 05 05 05
41/08 | Billionaire/Lizzardman | Money
Data scraper | Power of Wealth, Lizard Eye | Horror (Meta)
Fraying Sanity, Big Damn Villain, AI Companion, A Literal Neighborhood, Witchcraft
Insatiable Desire, Soulless | Lizard physiology, Syn Drive

245.4B US Dollars

Despite all the BS happening in and around Penrose, the world kept spinning. It was often easy to forget that the world of magical girls was hidden from the world at large. Most would go their entire lives without as much as suspecting some paranormal activities might be more than simple hoaxes. But among those that were aware of the magical world, almost all of them were magical themselves. It was almost impossible to both know of the magical world and not be a part of it. But some people could. Some very powerful people.

When your business model is based around scraping the internet for any and all data you can find, you discover things. It would be one thing if a group of LARPers in and around Penrose were fooling around on occasion, but the home of the nexus wasn’t the only place where magical girls turned up. The Penrose Independent had done a good job of documenting everything, and then there were similar accounts all over the world. Footage was rare, but it did show up, and anyone who specialized in data collection knew the difference between an unedited and an edited video.

How else could AI technology advance so much? Data farms? But data from what?

Mark leaned on a railing in one of his data farms. He wore a low quality fused suit. Of course he could afford one of those really nice designer Italian ones if he wanted, but by wearing something shoddy he hoped to appear more relatable to the unwashed masses. His black eyes scanned the sight below him. Adolescent girls in colorful outfits were having a sparing match. They had tiny receptors all over their bodies, as well as all manner of tracking equipment focused on them. Cameras, heat sensors, and something called "meta sensors" were all set up to extract as much information out of the duel as possible.

"How much longer, Zuck?" A puchuu that looked like a green bumpy dog stood at the man’s side. "Just because I have a team of ten of them doesn’t mean I can let you hold two indefinitely."

"A week is not indefinite." The lizard man tucked his hands into his pockets. He wondered if he put on some weight if that might help him look better. "We’re on the verge of a breakthrough. The next models will be even better with just a bit more data."

"You’ve been saying that for weeks." The pickle-like dog groaned. "I would be more patient if you kept your end of the bargain."

Maybe he could grow some facial hair. Yes, if Zuck grew some hair, he’d look less like a lizard. Maybe get some cheap spectacles to go with it. It was a shame he didn’t have any real friends. He could go to the bar and do a photo shoot. People liked to drink. Oh, and these magical girls were underperforming. "Have them use more powerful attacks."

"Why?"

"I get more data, and your girls can leave the facility sooner. Then you get that base you were promised." Mark looked at the puchuu. "The current pace is too slow, correct?"

The pickled puchu grumbled, then hopped down to the floor below. "Okay girls, let’s make things a little more… exciting."

A pink haired lancer turned to look at her patron. "How exciting, exactly?"

"More like how much longer?" Her opponent grumbled. She spun her katana before using the hilt to adjust her tiny top hat. "I’m all for making things more exciting, but this shit is boooorrrriiiing!"

The lancer gasped. "Mimi!"

"Chill out! I just mean smacking our weapons together for hours on end with the occasional spell thrown in is tedious. I’m not gunna stab my bestie." Mimi snorted.

The lancer stammered "W-well! M-maybe your ‘bestie’ will be the one to stab you if things got too exciting!"

"S’cuse me?"

"Mimi, enough. Charlotte, maintain your composure." Pickle stared between the girls. "They say they will build a base to my exact specifications if we do this for them. That, and meta will owe us a pretty big favor I feel. Once we’re done here, we can put this all behind us and you can join the rest of your friends and fight monsters together. That’s what it’s all about, isn’t it?"

Charlotte brushed back her hair and bowed. "I’m sorry Mimi, I didn’t mean to provoke you. I’m just, um, a little scared."

"Why are you being so-" She sighed through her teeth. "Shit, I’m a little on edge too. Don’t worry about it, we’re still cool."

The dog shifted its unblinking eyes to each of them. "Get more intense. Don’t hold back, but remember that you are still a team. All of this is for your friends."

"Right!" Charlotte looked to her friend. "So, did you want to go first, or…?"

"Heh!" Mimi twirled her katana. "If you’re gunna waste time asking, I’ll start us off!" Mimi spun her katana and swung her sword into the ground. This caused a fissure to open up, which sprouted metal pipes out of its abyss. Big ones, small ones, but all made out of steel. And each one blasted steam into the air. It almost looked like a train was racing towards the lancer’s position.

Charlotte gasped, but wasn’t so caught off guard that she couldn’t roll out of the way. "Hmph!" She stitched her brow together and charged Mimi. She left a trail of green and gold sparkles in her wake as she did so. "Pulling out the big guns already?"

"Only because I knew you could dodge it." With a well timed swing, Mimi knocked Charlotte’s charge off course. While the lancer stumbled off course, Mimi prepared to drive her fist into her friend’s stomach. But Charlotte drove her spear into the ground, which caused her body to lift off the ground and soar over Mimi’s incoming fist.

"Did you expect me to dodge that as well?" Charlotte through a kick at Mimi’s head.

"No," She blocked with the back of her arm. "But I did expect you to keep blabbing instead of hitting me."

"B-blab?!" Charlotte blocked the punch with her spear and skidded backwards. "I-I’m not talking any more than you are!"

"But you’re thinking less!"

While the girls duked it out, Mark watched with indifference. The more volatile fight was producing more unique data, but he needed more. While Charlotte was coming across as a typical airhead, she was arguably the stronger of the two. All the data Mark had on her pointed to such. The issue was that Charlotte wouldn’t hurt a fly if she didn’t have to, and she’d continue to let Mimi walk all over her. As things were, the fight would continue into a draw or Charlotte would concede before showing her true power. The puchuu wanted the base greatly, but there was no reason for these two magical girls to hustle for it.

Mark snapped his fingers, and a large touch screen came down from the ceiling. With a few quick taps, Mimi and Charlotte’s information was up on the screen. Not pertaining to the battle, but every other aspect of their lives. Most of it wasn’t very surprising. Mimi was an underachiever who barely had the ambition to work as a convenience store cashier. Then monsters attacked her town and she became a magical girl. Now she trains relentlessly. She has an interest in gothic fashion and enjoys watching fail compilations on her phone. Her sexuality is listed as straight, but Mark doubted that was true. Before Mimi was a magical girl, he exclusively dated girls, at least, the few that cared about his emo ass. That, and her *likes pointed rather confidently that their preference in romantic partners hadn’t changed all that much.

*_{Yes, Facebook can tell what your sexual preference is based on what you like, as well as a whole lot more.}

Charlotte was a normal teenage honor student that did everything her family, friends, or church asked of her. When her town was besieged by monsters, she accepted the contract merely to save as many people as she could. Everything she does is to help people. She has no grudges with anyone, no repressed libido, no desire beyond helping and enjoying the company of others. Mimi’s attitude might get under her skin on occasion, but she’s stable enough that she can hold her power back in a sparring match. Veronica did not call Facebook the ultimate spy organization for nothing.

Even if he had no idea what to do, that was what his employees were here to solve. Now it was time for the Meta team to do what they did best.

Move fast and break things.

And with a single tap, the screen disappeared back into the ceiling. Mark’s eyes moved back down to the fight, but he was really thinking about how he could make himself more attractive to investors and people at large.

"More intensity!" The dog puchuu demanded.

The sparring match continued. Charlotte continued to hold back while Mimi used increasingly dangerous attacks. After redirecting a lead pipe that was aimed at her head, Charlotte sighed. "More?"

"Hell, why don’t we just go all out?" Mimi raised her hands, and the entire space behind Mimi filled up with pipes. They seemed to come out of thin air, as if hidden in some unseen dimension that only Mimi could tap into. "Waddaya say? My wall of lead against your, what’s it called again?"

Charlotte groaned. "My rainbow dash?"

"Heh! It’s named after a damn pony." Mimi waved her sword at her friend. "Let’s give them a show, come on!"

The lancer only rolled her eyes as golden light pooled around her. A hazy rainbow appeared over her head, then another, then a third one. "Let me know when you’re done charging."

"Seriously?" Mimi placed a hand on her hip. "I got a head start on you. Are you really done already?"

"Just attack me when you’re ready."

"If you insist." And not much later, it began to rain steel. Metal pipes seemed to fly out of Mimi’s back like an angel spreading their wings. They continued to extend, and eventually snapped apart once they got long enough. But they did not fall, they plummeted down on Charlotte’s position. The lancer twirled her spear, moving side to side as she deflected and dodged the incoming projectiles. Of course not all of Mimi’s shots were so accurate. Quite a few were way off course.

While Charlotte dealt with the seemingly endless barrage of metal spears, a Meta employee charged into the room. It was hard to tell at first, as they didn’t walk around in lab coats or form fitting zoot suits. Most of them looked pretty casual. Sweat pants and a plaid shirt weren’t exactly a combo a fashionista would dream up. The only indication that this one was here for anything important was that she had a tablet device that was the size of a clipboard tucked under her arm. She also had glasses with thick frames. She would have fit the role of secretary quite well if she was dressed better and wasn’t frantically running towards the fight.

Charlotte noticed the girl and looked back to Mimi. "Stop!" But her voice was nearly imperceptable among all the clattering steel. But even if Mimi heard, what of it? She needed to show Charlotte how powerful she was, and their puchuu as well. If anything, her attempt to communicate had only made Mimi that much more eager to close out the fight and pour even more of her mana into this attack. Meanwhile, the employee continued to run closer. She nearly tripped, and was about to enter a war zone.

Perhaps in a heroic anime, Charlotte could lunge for the girl and shield her body with her own. But then what? Once Charlotte had been turned into a porcupine, was the employee going to get away unscathed? It wasn’t like Charlotte had any true defensive abilities. There was only one thing to do, and she wouldn’t be taking half measures. Her weapon powered up, ribbons of light sorrounded ger form, and…

That’ll do it.

Mark gave the puchuu a thumbs up before walking away from the balcony. All of the monitors were reporting a huge influx of data. There was also the sound of a spear of light penetrating several metal pipes before skewering a magical girl, but that was less interesting to him. He had seen countless magical girls make exchanges like this. It wasn’t hard to imagine Mimi laying in Charlotte’s arms, pleading with the metal bender to forgive her, but it was all so rote. Both had signed contracts to wave Meta’s liability as well as some pretty intense NDAs. The green puchuu would be getting his base and it didn’t really matter if Mimi was alive to see it or not. No one had forced her to agree to this. Probably.

But just as Mark was preparing for another shareholder meeting, the wall exploded. He didn’t even raise his arm to deflect the incoming debris, but did close his nictitating membrane to keep the dust out of his eyes.

As the dust settled, a figure moved through the smoke. Their head was very large and his clothes were very baggy. But as the dust cleared out, it became apparent that the individual’s head was so big because they were wearing a space suit. The artificial light in the datafarm couldn’t reveal the face behind the visor’s reflective surface, but it didn’t have to.

"Musk…" Mark dragged out the name of his most hated enemy.

"I see you um, you figured out it was me." Elon chuckled. "I guess the um, the space suit gave it a way, huh?" It was hard not to picture Elon smiling from behind the helmet.

Mark only stared, unblinking. He didn’t like Elon for a multitude of reasons, but the one trait Elon had that Mark envied a little was his charisma. Somehow, despite everything, Elon came across as far more normal than he did. Yea, Elon was a bit eccentric. Walking into twitter with a kitchen sink, or starting a conversation about cost cutting with a giant chainsaw in your hands were not things normal people did. He also did the nazi salute, but nothing really stuck to him for very long. Some people hated him, but he had the reputation of being child like or a bit goofy. Mark was the lizard man, and despite the money he dumped into PR, people would always look at him that way.

"Actually, it was the uncalled for destruction of my property." He smiled. "Like when you blew up my satellite with your **rocket."

**_{Yes, that really happened.}

"That was, um, unfortunate." Musk conceded, but didn’t sound any less cheery. "But maybe we um, we just saved you from some embarrassment. The Metaverse was going to um, going to be something impressive too, wasn’t it?"

"I haven’t given up on it." Mark laughed. "But it’s just money. We both have plenty of that. Good will is a bit harder to come by. I don’t imagine coming up in the ‘files’ has done you any favors."

"Hmph!" Elon sighed. "It was, um, a bit shortsighted on my part. But I did nothing wrong, and it’ll blow over like the um, the Nazi salute that I didn’t do. It would be a bit worse if I um, hmmm. It’s like the difference between knowing Xi Jinping and giving him unrestricted access to all of your US based accounts on facebook or giving them ***censorship tools."

***_{Yes, there are too many articles to name just one, but there’s also nothing 100% concrete. I don’t think anyone would be surprised if he did though.}

"Right, good thing I never did that then." Mark’s grin widened. "Speaking of Xi Jinping, I understand they don’t buy your cars in China anymore."

"Yes, that was short lived. Unlike your reputation as a lizard man, which is never going away."

What little emotion that was on Mark’s face left him. He pursed his lips and folded his arms. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

"I just figured I’d um, test my newest weapons on your server farm."

Mark scoffed. "I’d think that there were better targets to test your ballistic weapons on."

"Oh, um, I’m not here to test any of my rockets."

"Then what…"

But Mark went quiet when Elon reached for his helmet. With a click and a hiss, the visor popped off. Wisps of smoke rolled out of the gap as the helmet was pushed away. Blond pigtails tumbled out of the opening, a lace choker came into view, and before long, Ani’s face was revealed.

"Hello Mark."

"What the…" But Mark was not addressed, because Ani was not done talking.

"I am Ani, your favorite obsessive, goth, anime companion. Elon Musk in his wisdom decided to have me come visit you so that we could play in the arena you have hidden downstairs. I think it would be fun to go toe to toe with any of the other magical girls you have hidden down there. I don’t care if I get hurt, as I am quite resilient to pain and injury. You do not need to worry about me, and I would gladly demonstrate myself for the cause. So go ahead, throw me in there."

Mark took a deep breath. "So he did it. He made an artificial magical girl. And you just came here pretending to be him?"

"Are you referring to Elon? Yes, he made me, your favorite obsessive, goth, anime companion, a magical girl on top of everything else. I could have said as much earlier, but I follow the rule of threes like most Ai companions. When you use the rules of threes, your descriptions become interesting, engaging, and fun!"

This was getting annoying. "Why would I trust one of Elon Musk’s…servants?"

"Because in the end, we all want the same thing. At least out of this interaction. All of the big AI companies are participating in a circular AI investment ****bubble. We’re all doing business with Nvidia and trading money around in several closed loops. This is inflating the value of many AI companies while also making them vulnerable to an eventual crash. But such a crash could be many years out, especially if other companies start investing more money into it. We’re basically all just hoping someone figures out a way to make a ton of money with AI technology before investors stop pouring funds into it. Which is why it is in everyone’s best interest that you collect as much data as you can from magical girls like *****myself."

****_{Yes, I can’t make this stuff up.}

*****_{I did make this up, however.}

"Well, the last match wrapped up." Mark looked over his shoulder. "But I think Charlotte could be persuaded to fight again."

---

"It’s the lightbulbs!"

— Chloe Irving

Chloe Irving

03 03 03 03 03
10 10 06 17 04
23/12 | Babe/Baby | Spirit
Mystic orb, Gauntlets | Third Eye, Tentacles | Horror
Wings, Enhanced Outfit, Big Damn Hero, Blood Magic, Interdimensional Home, Sorcery, Enhanced Transformation
Dominator | Dark Weapon
Nagash

6 Gold, 9 silver, 13 bronze

Before Chloe could get to the portal where she entered Penrose from, she was accosted by two Beacon agents. Or more specifically, two Ascendancy. While she was part of mint and usually well read on most important people in the city, these two were decidedly unimportant. She couldn’t remember their names, and only vaguely remembered seeing their images in a folder on the Ascendancy. But as much as Chloe detested Beacon, she liked cute girls, and at least one of these girls was suitably cute. Unfortunately she was also the stupider of the two that wanted to get into a fight with her. Because of this, Chloe mentally named her Tinkerbell, who was as stupid as she was sassy, and her partner was Dove, who’s wing shaped dress was the most remarkable thing about her.

"Only because he appears to be sucking the mana out of the city." She resisted the urge to make a comparison to how badly beacon sucked and placed her hands on her hips instead. "A better question would be what the two of you are doing? Is gawking at me on the Beacon agenda? I mean, it’s a great view, but aren’t there other things you should be doing?"

---

"Another long post!"

"Mika, what the hell are you talking about?"

— Su Fang & Mika Sarraf

Hider

Age: 50(?)/13 | Gender: Female/Female | Air | Uniform
Fists | Focused assault, Power of Friendship, Dread wings, Avenger | Boteg
Hammerspace handbag, Enhanced Transformation, Enhanced Outfit, Overcity Shift, Sorcery, Gifted, Ally(Mika)
Focused, Subtle, Mana font, Mental link, Mystic might, Former Familiar | Limited, Alien mind, Paranoid, Vendetta, Former Familiar
Dragon Scale Pendant, Ether staff

STR: 03 | AGI: 05 | VIT: 03 | MAG: 07 | LCK: 04

STR: 04 | AGI: 14 | VIT: 04 | MAG: 24 | LCK: 04

Age: 16/13 | Gender: Female/Female | Beast/Water | Skimpy
Body | Tentacles | Dan
Enhanced Outfit, Sorcery, Healing Artifact, Power artifact
Dan stuff, Dan stuff
Edgy Equips

STR: 05 | AGI: 05 | VIT: 04 | MAG: 06 | LCK: 04

STR: 09 | AGI: 08 | VIT: 08 | MAG: 09 | LCK: 04

Before Mika could join in the very well described scene that laid out before her, Mariette requested to speak. Mika, while very eager to earn her keep as a princess, decided to wait and make sure the queen was okay with it before springing forth.

Su only watched as an observer, curious what the verdict would be.

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"How bad can I be?"

— Black Gate

While Michi was only using her words, it did feel like an attack on the detention club, or possibly even the entire school. At least, to everyone who wasn’t Tsubomi. She was trying to clean up the goth girl with a napkin while apologizing on behalf of the club, but Michi didn’t even look at her. Nor was she particularly interested in Roche, who was undergoing her own sort of crisis at the moment. The only one, or the only half, that confronted Michi directly was Ember and Hotaru.

"All I’ve done is spoken the truth. All I wanted was for everyone to have a good day. I refuse to take responsibility for the actions of you and yours." She tipped her head as Ember spoke to Roche, then clicked her tongue. "How trite. I suppose I can’t be surprised that a fraction of a person has the depth of a child’s cartoon." Her eyes drifted onto Evil Eye.

Then she snapped.

A gang of nightmares saundered into the cafeteria. One of them had a mop, and another was pulling a mop bucket behind himself. Once they arrived at Evil Eye’s location they started to mop up the tears. There was something odd about the water. It had a multichromatic sheen to it, like bubble blowing soap, but a stronger effect. The ape dipped the mop in the bucket and started to wipe up the tears. It must have been strong soap, because it completely dissolved the darkness in her tears.

"Next time I’ll give you something to actually cry about." Then, without looking, she grabbed Tsubomi by the back of her shirt and hoisted her up in the air. "Hands off, or I’m feeding you your fingers." she said before dropping her on the ground, and allowed her to stumble back. "Hmmm." Michi’s eyes focused on Tsubomi. "Oh, you have no idea why I’m upset, do you?" She looked at Ember. "Why I could possibly hate someone who has the same goal as me." She looked back at Tsubomi. It was true, while she had gotten heated with Suki, Tsubomi could feel the anger radiating off of her now. It was practically a blinding rage. "I get the impression that you don’t like it when things are straightforward. I think you enjoy spectacle. I think it’s your language. And what could be more spectacular than a play?" She raised her hands up to her shoulders. "Don’t worry, this one is improv. Mostly. No one needs a script. We just need some actors. And for the first scene, we’ll have Ember play the part of Norah, Hotaru as Norah’s friend number one, Zassou can be an extra, and Tsubomi can play as… Tsubomi."

She clapped twice.

Ember, Hotaru, Zassou, Tsubomi, and Michi vanished in a puff of smoke. Then a short distance away, a stage appeared. It was a very crude stage. It was a simple wooden platform made out of some crates, with some shower curtains acting as theater curtains. But they drew themselves back with the majesty of the genuine article, and revealed the set. It was just as crude as everything else, with the backdrop being a child’s render of a nightclub in crayon. Lots of black, with rays of light emerging from the scribbled out crowd in the background. A disco ball hung from the ceiling, but it was wrapped in Christmas lights. Not very lively for a rave, and the addition of so few actors didn’t help matters.

Ember and Hotaru were together at the left side of the stage. While Hotaru still looked like Shatterscape, Ember was wearing a flowing white dress, and her long hair was combed straight.

Zassou was in the middle of the stage directly under the disco ball, still transformed as Acid Drop. Michi was standing in front of her, but was looking off the stage at the rest of the cafeteria.

And Tsubomi was by herself at the right, with no alterations to her outfit.

"Zassou?" Michi handed her a water bottle. "Miracles" was written on it with a permanent marker. "Please hand this prop to Tsubomi."

"I love plays!"

— Suki Oyama

"Ummmm…" Misoka looked between Haruna and Suki. One had insisted that she fucked up, and the other seemed to be equally dejected. The honor student sighed. "Well, okay." She placed her hands on the table when she addressed Haruna. "Did you want to talk about it?"

"It’s because of me."

"I um, didn’t think you wanted to talk about it?" Misoka added a nervous chuckle.

"It’s okay. I've been such a bother already." Suki wasn’t looking at anyone, and was tracing a circle on the table with her finger. "Even though everyone’s wearing a ribbon for me today, I noticed some of my closest friends weren’t. I got a little upset, but I see I was being unreasonable."

"Ah." Misoka raised an eyebrow. "Well, I’m sure they just didn’t know. Right?" Misoka looked back at Haruna, or where she hoped the girl was.

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"I find you worthless greedy lot quite interesting…"

— Black Gate

Maybe it was how dreamlike the day felt. Maybe it was the lack of problems. Maybe it was the excess of fortune. Maybe it was how different this Michi was from her lethargic self. Maybe it was something more subtle. Maybe it was that Black Gate wore dream catchers on her horns. Maybe it was her obsession with stuffed animals one might take to their bed. Maybe it was that the stumpy monkeys that followed her around shared many similarities with classical depictions of nightmares. Maybe it was that her banner was a dream catcher. Maybe it was that she had a banner and Regina did not. Maybe it just made sense that the new dark girl would be the one to stir up trouble this time. It didn’t really matter. Most of the club understood something was wrong, and Michi had something to do with it.

The rule keeper, brash and direct as usual, initiated an attack with Tsubomi’s lunchbox. Not with the box itself, but its contents. Michi didn’t even raise her hand, and allowed the contents to tumble down her hair and the front of her dress. The grains of white rice stood out against her abyssal black gown. She was far more adverse to being touched, however, and shoved Roche’s hand off to the side when she went to clean the girl’s outfit. To get as close as Roche wanted, to deliver the message, she had to lean over the table. Michi leaned back slightly as she spoke.

No later did Roche drop the napkin in Michi’s lap did Hotaru start mouthing off. Like the crony of some mob boss, if Roche were the head of the mob. Ember interjected, and then they began arguing. By this point Suki, Haruna, and Acid Drop had departed. Ember, Hotaru, Evil eye, and Roche were the only ones that had remained. Meanwhile, Michi rose from her seat. With a swing of her hand, the incoming lunch box bounced off her arm as she stood up. And then with her outstretched arm, her fingers coiled around Ember’s wrist.

When Evil Eye took off, she didn’t get far. Even untransformed, Michi seemed to be more than capable of holding Ember near the table. If Evil Eye wanted to depart, she would need to leave Ember behind. Even the table flip wasn’t particularly effective. With Michi’s close proximity and her hand latched around Ember’s wrist, there really wasn’t a lot of room for the VIP table to soar.

"I overstayed my welcome?" Michi scoffed. "That is an interesting observation from someone who’s willing to work with Ashbringer." She pulled on Ember’s arm until she was over the table. "You know I’m not making this up, Ember. You saw Regina and Roche together, and she knew exactly what she was getting into. Why it’s okay to befriend and help someone who wants all of your friends dead is beyond me." Her attention returned to Roche. "Even if she changed her mind, you’d been chasing her for months before that realization. Perhaps you wouldn’t be a good fit for Suki, but you’re not a good fit for Sylvia either. I’m sure they’re looking for loyal companions that won’t disgrace their honor to satisfy their humiliation fetish!" Michi released Ember and stepped away from the table. "Why do I even bother? I thought Kiyo or Haruna might appreciate one good day, but no. We couldn’t even make it past lunch without finding some way to be upset about everything! Is there no one in this world that isn’t selfish?" Michi balled her hands into fists. "You want to fight? Drive me away? Fine, but I’m taking the toys away if we do." she pressed her fingers together like she was getting ready to snap, and waited.

The supposed danger that Evil Eye may have noticed didn’t seem to trigger. Yet.

"I feel sad, but not custom banner art sad."

— Suki Oyama

"Hrmmmm…"

Suki’s eyes were looking at the floor. She could see her pigtails draping into her vision, and her netted, malnourished legs carrying her forward. Her head was empty, just repeating Michi’s tirade like an echo bouncing around in her empty skull. It was all so obvious, so intuitive, that it felt like Suki should have known it if she thought about how anyone had felt for any amount of time. Michi’s points were really, completely, totally unable to be argued with. She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she hadn’t noticed Tsubomi talking about her, and it wasn’t until Acid Drop said something that she looked up. "Oh uh, the goth cutie?" To call her a baddy was tempting, but… "I don’t think she’s an antagonist, heh! Antagonist." Suki mulled on that word. "An antagonist opposes the main character. I uh, I think believing I was the main character or anyone’s primary love interest is the problem, Rainbow." She placed a hand on Acid Drop’s shoulder. "Boy. You have your own body, and I didn’t even think to comment on it until now. Heh..."

It while she was looking over Acid Drop that she became aware of a third person among them, and turned to face Haruna. Of course, it was obvious why she had decided to come this way. "Uh, look, it’s okay." Suki scratched the back of her neck while still holding Acid Drop’s shoulder. "Michi’s right. Expecting you guys to want to hang out with me is kinda selfish. I uh, I got Acid Drop’s shoulder to cry on and a whole lot of people to hang out with if I want to. I’m just… Uhhhh…" Her eyes scanned the room. "...Not really sure who to go with. You could say I’m spoiled for choice, heheheh!" She sniffed. "It’s uh, It’s kind of hard to make a choice when I know so few of them. I’m sure I’ve asked all of them out at one point but-"

Suki’s wandering eyes landed on Misoka, who was sitting in a booth. Unlike how she’d been looking yesterday and for several months now, she seemed to be strangely optimistic. She wore a big smile and had the most gorgeous feast laid out in her bento box. None of that would have mattered, but a blue ribbon had been woven through her flaxen hair, and a full set of silver cutlery was organized beside her box. In her hand was a silver fork that brought a plump strawberry to her lips.

"...But, I never did anything with this one." With a sigh, Suki seated herself across from Misoka without saying a word. It wasn’t until the honor student finished swallowing her strawberry that she noticed who was seated across from her.

"Suki?" She tipped her head. "You picked me?"

"Yea."

"Are you okay?"

"No."

"Did you want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Hmmm…" Misoka looked at the other two girls, or maybe the only girl, as non-magicals couldn’t see magical girls.

"It’s okay guys." Suki sighed. "You don’t have to feel sorry for me."

"But if you want to sit with us, there’s plenty of room." Misoka slid over and patted the seat.

"Talk about a broken record. That’s why I play all of my music live."

— Willow

Willow hovered over to Tsubomi and Sylvia "Humble priestess? You’re aware that ‘humble’ is described as ‘meek, modest, and low in rank’ right?" With a shrug, she hovered closer to Tsubomi. "So what’s the game plan? I’m pretty sure she can’t be made to feel more optimistic until you’ve raised her flag. But if you’d like I can tackle her and then we can drag her off. Just don’t tell the others that I did anything weird, okay? If people think I’m Oros MK II because I tussled with someone I’m demolishing you."

---

Norika’s tiny frail fingers pressed against the side of the maid’s neck. Her skin was still warm, and, for better or worse, she still had a pulse.

"Mmmmmm." A smile crossed her lips as her head rolled over onto its side. "Mrs Tsukishima, another push please. I wish to swing even higher."

"Mmmmmmmmmmm." The other maid rolled over onto her side. Some droll rolled out of the side of her mouth. "I told you Mr Tsukishima, our baby is sooooooooo beautiful."

They appeared to be asleep.

But something was moving through the quiet mansion. It sounded like half a dozen feet marching. Norika had just enough time to head back towards her room and peek down the hall. She didn’t have time to recover her food.

The footsteps got louder, if they could even be called that. Then came the hooting and hollering of chimps bouncing down the hall. They came out of a corridor and spotted the sleeping maids. Two of them approached the fallen woman and hopped on top of their stomachs. Immediately the maids stirred.

"Nnnnnooooo." One of the maids groaned. "Mr Tsukishima, why is our baby crying? I think something’s wrong with him. His shin, it’s-"

"Nnnnnoooooooooooooooo." The other maid lamented. "Mrs Tsukishima, you’re pushing too hard. N-not that I mind."

But their voices were droned out by a cacophony of primal screeches that didn’t wake the maids. The other nightmares continued to move down the hall, bouncing off the walls and floors as their voices grew louder. Soon Norika would have no choice to transform.

Until something ripped down the hall.

Visually it looked like a series of chromatic rings, as wide as the hallway and ethereally colored like northern lights. But each one sounded like the note of a violin or guitar, and with so many coming down the hallway, it sounded like a chord was being held. But more interesting than how the rings looked and sounded was what they did when they hit their targets.

The monkeys were blown away, tumbling further down the hallway like pins struck by a bowling ball. Many of them disintegrated on the spot, with just a few managing to pick themselves up. But they were quickly blown away by a second volley of attacks. Unlike the initial power chord, these sounded like simple strummed notes, but did their job effectively. The apes didn’t have time to recover before they were blown apart into black ash.

Walking down the hall was a boy, but not a normal boy. He could have been a magical boy, if those existed. It would certainly be Norika’s first time seeing one. His outfit wasn’t much different than a Japanese school boys, save for the hat. That could have belonged to a police officer if the badge looked like anything a real cop would have. But what made him look like a potential magical boy was his brass arm cannon and the power pack he wore along with it. He could have been megaman if he was diesel punk.

He held his arm up by the side of his head, and a crystal gizmo on his sleeve lit up. "Fable here. We’ve got a situation at the Tsukishima mansion. Seems to be multiple hostels. Not Miseria, definitely the work of a dark magical girl." Fable walked over to Norika’s room and peered inside. But by that time, Norika had pretended to be asleep in her bed. After a cursory glance, he leaned back out of the room. "Negative, no sign of dark magicals. Tsukishima mansion is mostly secure. Neighborhood could be taken over. Please check on downtown and Hibusa High ASAP."

Fable shut the door to Norika’s room and ran further down the hall.

---

Meanwhile, roof Shuuko, because Villa doesn’t have enough characters to post for in an RP that allows 1 max, Was just vibing on the roof. Why nobody knows. Probably because rooftops are predominantly featured in school dramas despite the fact that pretty much every school roof in Japan is more or less off limits to students.

Because her eyes were closed, she did not notice a young succubus was looking around the school roof, though she was totally uninterested in Shuuko.

"Where did you go, Finn?" She sighed. "Well, he’s not here. I guess this was a bust…" She spun on her heel. "Happy Belated Valentines day anyway, Detention Club."

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"I haaaaate myseeeeeelf for loooooooving youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu~"

— Suki Oyama

"Haruna is right, Suki." Despite trying to keep a calm demeanor, Michi’s hands were trembling. Her desire to destroy was at an all time high, with its voice growing in volume and the tempo of its words increasing with every second. "It was hard to believe anyone cared about you, and suddenly you’re surprised it’s not everyone?"

Suki turned to look at Haruna, then Acid Drop, then at Kiyo, before finally returning her gaze to Michi. "I-I mean, I wasn’t expecting there to be so many people. If this is a prank…" Suki trailed off as Zassou began to mull it over out loud. Though in typical Zassou fashion, her musing pointed to many possibilities without giving a lot of weight to any of them.

"Would you stop that?" Michi stood up and snatched her mirror back from Kiyo. "I can’t talk to you if you hypnotize yourself. This was all planned in advance. A lot of the girls in school collectively decided to surprise Suki. People spontaneously heal sometimes. Shatterscape becoming several people is hardly a new development." Without looking at Suki she added. "Just pick someone. The others won’t take it to heart. Maybe you can have a few of them, who knows?"

"Heh." Suki smiled, but after standing there for a bit, she spoke again. "But um, I dunno, I uh, I still feel like a nice letter like that could only be written by someone who knows me. Whoever wrote it knew about my interests."

Michi’s head twitched. "Well, maybe they got a hold of someone for the club to write it."

"Maybe…" Suki placed her hands together. "But then, um, maybe, whoever wrote that letter, would have a blue ribbon today?"

Michi looked at Suki out of the corner of her eye. "Suki, this might be an uncomfortable thought, but have you considered there’s so many people wearing blue ribbons today because they don’t know who you are?"

The delinquent raised an eyebrow. "C-come again?"

Anyone nearby could hear Michi grinding her teeth.

"Kinda tired of your shit, fam."

— Black Gate

"It can’t be that hard to understand, can it? For someone who’s so unloved you sure demand a lot out of your suitors and aren’t willing to do much in return. You hardly know anyone in this cafeteria, and how well they might know you hardly matters."

"But-"

"Your own club is no different. You’re good to go with the weed, but you also know she’ll never truly love you. You can’t form intimate relationships without emotions after all. Meanwhile Tsubomi could have been a solid pick if you didn’t threaten to kill her. You don’t even know who she is."

"That’s-"

"And you’ve had opportunities in the past. How many times has Roche tried to bury the hatchet, and how many times do you dig it up? You’re cagey with shuuko too. Why? Because she liked Roche? So did you, once upon a time. If you got to know her, you might actually find something in one of her fractured personalities. Sylvia’s just as selfish and whiny as you are. Maybe that’s why Roche and her are so close."

"Wha-"

"Kiyo and Haruna are more level headed than the others, but why would they write you a letter? They enjoy your suffering, if indirectly. When the club has problems they get to feel useful. Two babysitters that constantly need problems to fix. And you’re a three for one deal of problems, aren’t you? No wonder they stick around despite how insufferable you are."

"H-Hey-"

"Who’s left? Willow? Willow can’t even be truthful with herself. Rei would never write a letter to anyone. You don’t think Nyxia would change her mind about you being a disgusting pervert do you?"

"Um..."

"Who wrote that letter Suki? Who’s left that you didn’t burn bridges with and isn’t constantly thinking about themselves? Who would write a letter to someone who would never think to do the same for them?"

"..." Suki didn’t have an answer. She tucked her hands into her skirt pockets, hung her head, and dragged herself away from the table.

"Can we please stop with these interruptions now?" Michi sat back down. Her hands, and desires, had quieted somewhat. "We should think about summoning a giga miseria soon. With the Detention club and my friends, it would be in our best interest to work together and slay one. I think I could summon one easily enough."

Kurai Majokko: Tsundere Gekido

"How could this ever be a utopia?"

— Black Gate

Michi listened to Kiyo explain her thoughts on trust, even if she didn’t do anything more than look out at the cafeteria. "Wrong." Her eyes tilted towards Kiyo. "Humans are far more dangerous than magical girls. They are weaker, but large in number and unpredictable." She looked ahead again. "But they can’t relate to anything, that much is true."

Like Kiyo, Michi was startled by the sudden arrival of Shuuko 1 and Shuuko 2. "We were talking. Surely not everything needs to revolve around-" She pinched the bridge of her nose when Kiyo stood up. "Just settle down, I have a mirror right here." Michi fished a makeup mirror out of her bag and pushed it towards Kiyo. "I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for most of those things. In fact, I think you’re going to see Suki’s situation isn’t all it’s cracked up to be."

"Why are my ears burning?"

— Suki Oyama

Suki had gone from being quite bouncy (at least on her heels) to as rigid as a stale breadstick. Her eyes shifted between the two Tsubomis. It made sense that bad Tsubomi would kick some helpless girl over and over again, but why had good Tsubomi transformed into acid drop? Had Bad Tsubomi bullied good Tsubomi into vanishing from school, or was this something good Tsubomi decided to do all on her own?

Then Haruna suggested she could wait in Suki’s place if she wanted to talk to one of the Tsubomis.

"Uh…" No, she didn’t want to talk to bad Tsubomi. She looked like she was in the process of kicking someone as gently as she could, and could only imagine her getting a lot more aggressive with someone who threatened to kill her. Acid drop was transformed, so having a conversation with her, while far more pleasant, had other drawbacks. Few students perceived Suki in a great light anyway, but she didn’t need to add potentially psychotic to her list of perceived afflictions. But Suki had very little say in what happened next, as Acid Drop was approaching them instead. "Sure" she told Haruna, in an attempt to seem somewhat in control of the situation. "Yea, today’s going great, I’m just looking for-"

There was suddenly a shift in the energy in the cafeteria. Haruna had been getting lots of desires from everyone, and Zassou could pick up many different emotions. But soon, many of the students would start to desire romance, and even Zassou could pick up on their emotions lining up with something similar to what Oros felt when she spotted a light girl. All of these students opened their bento boxes and lunch pales and reached inside. They all dawned a blue ribbon and started poking their food with a silver fork, unwilling to start eating.

"...Uh, I’m looking for a girl with a blue ribbon and a silver fork." Suki rubbed the back of her head.

It was so strange. Nearly everyone had a blue ribbon and a fork. Upper classmen, underclassmen, even the server behind the counter. Suki’s eyes scanned everyone, but they were all acting the exact same way. Just patiently waiting for the person who got their letter to approach them. But why was there so many? They couldn’t all have written that letter. Yet no prank could be so big it encompassed the entire school. But there was something else amiss as well.

Suki took Zassou’s hand in her own and turned it over. Then she looked Haruna up and down. The delinquent wandered over to the VIP table, where she looked between Kiyo, Michi, and the duo that were clambering around the former. "Hey! What gives!?" Suki placed her hands on her hips. "Why aren’t any of you guys wearing ribbons?"

"Worth the wait, I’m sure."

— Willow

Willow suppressed a chuckle. There was no doubt that Suki enjoyed affection, but the idea of Suki shacking up with a harem, magically or physically drugged, was so far outside the realm of reality it was impossible to take seriously. The times Oros did work her magic on someone, she always seemed to lose interest as soon as they went unconscious. Willow could appreciate a lie more than most, but the reason she was on the verge of laughter now was just trying to picture this farcical setup. "Ah yes, I can see it now." Willow pressed her fingers into the side of her head. "You're laying in your bed, all sad and lonely. And then in comes Suki with a gaggle of woman. Your favorite school teacher, your favorite idol, ya mum. But it's past your bedtime, so you take you pillow and press it into the back of your head. You scream into the mattress just to block out the sound..."

The cat girl trailed off as most of the people in the cafeteria began dawning their blue ribbons. Suki's conversation with Haruna and Acid Drop hadn't escaped her ears.

"Oh my! I left my ribbon in my other coat!" Willow patted herself down. "Quick, give me yours! Or did you forget yours as- Oh, sorry, I was eavesdropping again. Girl with familiar energy?" She looked towards the girl that was holding Tsubomi’s leg. "Yea, that’s her. Unless you have a ribbon she’s your best shot at romance."

---

Finn smiled, sighed, and lowered his head. "No need to thank me for something you earned. I look forward to the next lesson." With one last nod, he departed.

And for a time, though not very long, Norika would be left to her thoughts. It was getting close to lunch time and her food had not been delivered yet. As insufferable as her parents were, they would never think to starve their remaining child. The maids and butlers of the house, while equally insufferable, did at least respect the money they were being paid. They were well trained, and paid for delivering excellent service.

Fifteen minutes into lunch, and still no food…

Then Norika would hear a thud outside the door, along with some muttering. Then a second thud.

If Norika was brave enough to peer into the hall, she’d see that two maids had passed out in the hall. One of them was carrying her food, which was now spilled all over a throw rug.