If your girl can't crack your skull between her thighs then whats the point of even being a human being.
7
likes
8 yrs ago
Identities are confusing to figure out.
4
likes
8 yrs ago
How do wing.
8 yrs ago
Omae wa mou shindeiru.
3
likes
Bio
Well hello.
I guess I should introduce myself, huh.
I'm Gardevoiran, just some schmuck going to college and working towards getting a degree in Fine Arts.
I do commissions and what-not, and you can ask me to do a commission for you through my Discord (Gardevoiran #1429) or up here through RPGuild PMs, and I receive donations and payment through my Ko-fi page. Clicking the box right below here will take you to it.
I'm a nerd. I play Pokemon religiously, I dabble in some anime, I write up here, and I love watching incredibly awful movies and just making fun of them. Specifically things like "Leo the Lion" and what not.
I don't have much else to say, so I guess I can leave you guys with a really bad joke.
"What do you call a cow with two legs?" "Lean beef."
What in the 7 circles just happened to the skeletal swordsman? Everything that just happened was like a blur to him, and from one moment he had been preparing to dive his sword between the flesh of a succubus' breasts to hum being on the ground in the middle of a city square. The skeleton would say he had the wind knocked out of him, but he really didn't.
Well... city square was a bit of an overstatement. There was barely anyone here. It was more akin to a deserted village than a city. The skeleton began to roam around the town, trying to find anyone to speak to when everything was in a dark void. The silence would finally cease when two people, donned in pale green cloaks approached the skeleton, getting his attention. The voice that rang from one of them was that of a feminine voice, and she held a lantern that produced a small influx of... magic? It didn't seem like magic but it looked magical. "Bonesword. The skeletal warrior of the Machina."
The skeleton paused as he heard this. How did these two men know his name, and more importantly who were these people. The skeleton placed his hand on the hilt of his blade as he spoke back to the cloaked figures. "Yes...? Who are you?"
"We are representatives from the Inquisitional College. I trust that you got here safely?"
"I'd say that it wouldn't be... well... safe, more or less I got here."
"That's just as good. We've been watching your skills and prowess and we believe that you may be a strong opponent for an upcoming tournament that we are hosting here in the city. The Crucible."
The skeleton tilted his head as he brought his hand off his sword blade. "Go on."
The previously silent one started to advertise, his far more masculine voice ringing throughout the town. "Thirty-two contenders! Each fighting the others for their souls, all of it leading to the end of the tournament, where the one who holds thirty-two souls is allowed to obtain a single wish, granting them anything that their heart desires!"
The skeleton would have believed this as a false promise, largely due to the winner being able to claim a wish, but then he realized that this was incredibly similar to the trials of Hohenheim, where the winner was literally able to bring an entire race back from extinction. Maybe this would function the same way? It was too much to dwell on though, as the thought of his wish made a theoretical stream of drool fall from his jaw. He could bring Abigail back from her death at the hands of Rhine. He could do it.
He could win her back.
"... I'll bite. Get me to the registration."
"Automatically done. Follow me to the arena, and Trentus will explain a few things about this tournament."
Bonesword followed the feminine voice as Trentus began to speak to him about something that he wasn't really knowledgeable on. "This is held in the City of Echoes, but that's the unimportant part. The actual important part is that you have a place that's important to you and that will be one of the biggest factors in your wish. That's slightly more important, but the real big thing here is that everyone in this tournament has a soul you must obtain."
"What in the fuck?" Bonesword inquired, pulling a bottle of scotch out of his knapsack. Thank Eos it was still intact from the incredible entrance the swordsman made.
"Everyone must claim another's soul in order to proceed, and when someone gives their soul, they give all of their souls to you. You also don't need to kill someone to claim their soul."
"So I can make someone give me their soul from mercy? That's a relief."
"Oh, one for mercy are we? You'll be popular with the College, I know that."
"... when will I know who I'm fighting against?"
"No clue, hopefully soon."
"Here."
The woman stopped in front of a rather-large door, with smoke and fog creeping out from underneath it, it's knob a pristine glean of silver. It was clear that this door led to somewhere, but the skeleton just didn't know where it took him when it did. The woman also held out a small item for Bonesword, seemingly created out of nothing for him. "Take this phylactery and go through this door. "
Bonesword nodded as he grabbed the phylactery and opened the door, stepping inside and joining the other combatants in the area.
Ursaren was appalled at this man. He was seen scavenging off the corpse of a little girl, and even though the old man had his trident stained with blood, the cloaked figure was in the wrong. Even if he was wrong, Ursaren lowered his trident to the feet of the man in front of the group, still keeping his shield up.
"It's bloodied from mercy. If you don't want to believe me, check the alleys behind us. You'll find a dog with it's intestines spilled out in front of it." The same gruff voice came from the old man, and it took him a second but he recognized the Banian accent from the cloaked figure. Despite the slight sense of trust from the accent, the elder did not lower his shield at all. He wasn't going to let his guard down in the slightest, but his voice did ease up from being so rugged. "You've spent a lot of time in Bania... I have too. What did you do there...?" This was the next question posed to the cloaked figure from Ursaren. He had been in Bania for a bit more than a decade, and he wondered if this man was ever in Bania when Ursaren was.
The Bloodstained Blade - A fancy name for an ordinary sword. The only thing that's special about it is that it's colored red. In the event of a melee-encounter, Stride will fall back onto using this weapon.
The Xeno Staff - A summoning staff that allows the summon of one flying saucer minion, capable of shooting weak lasers at the opponent. There can only be one minion at a time, and they can be re-summoned when the existing one perishes.
Golden Shower - Get your mind out of the gutter! This spell tome casts a ray of golden light at the opponent, and if they are hit, they take increased damage from any source that hits them for a short period of time.
Life Drain - A staff that allows for decent damage off of other people and heals the caster, but is expensive to use in the Mana department.
The Mana Flower + 3 Mana Potions - Simply put, the Mana Flower allows for the automatic consumption of Mana potions, and each potion restores the caster's mana to full. (A paragraph with Life Drain automatically costs at least a single potion, and everything else costs about half of one. Stride get's 4 full cycles of Mana per combat session, including all the potions.)
Abilities:
Deathly Influence - Stride has seen his fate fall before him, and he has actually spoken to Death herself. Death had proclaimed she had a lot of money on Stride's accomplishments, and he should not disappoint her. As a result of Death's influence on Stride's life, he has gained a more resilient lock on his soul, and it will take a bit more to take his soul than the usual man.
No Neck - Not really an ability, but Stride can separate his head from his torso by taking it off. This was due to Death's plea for Stride's resurrection, and the way he went out caused irreversible damage to his neck. Stride's head is near harmless when in a combat scenario, but his body still is an independent entity, and will act as if Stride's head was still on it's neck.
Fighting Style: Take advantage of what you believe in, and remember why you are here. Stride is overly cocky during a fight, and will often rush into a situation without thinking, probably due to the misdirection that because he knows Death itself, he is immortal and believes it as such. More often than not, Stride will start out every fight by summoning a minion, and then proceeding to debuff his opponent and finishing it off with a constant spray of Life Drain. If need be, Stride will use anything he can find for cover when confronted with an opponent that is massively taller than he is, but he will still go headstrong in attempting to kill his enemy.
Personality: Stride is cocky and arrogant for the majority of the time, and constantly shows a bitter resentment towards humans and elves. Anybody else is okay, but humans and elves are the worst in his mind. Stride will wait and listen when he has to, but it's quite often that he'll divert from an intended plan in pursuit of a greater reward, and this showed once when he defended the life of a humanoid spider when an Orc tried to kill it, and he got his head chopped off in the process. Granted that wasn't the plan, but still.
Bio:
Stride was born in a region of his world where half-races were seen as being incredibly unholy and deserving of a lot of discrimination. This led to Stride leaving his home as soon as he could in pursuit of magical aptitude, and eventually getting caught up in the employment of Yashar, a powerful mage that needed a group of monsters to kill a group of heroes and retrieve this book. He also got cursed and constantly drooled, but that's besides the point. Before the actual quest started, Stride got his head chopped off and he met Death, who told him that he wasn't ready to die yet and he would be resurrected. Stride came back to life and helped get the book back, gaining vast knowledge over the world and eventually finding himself under the employment of Death again, who told him to enter this tournament and win in her name.
Wish: He wants to honor Death by winning the tournament and achieving total immortality.
Echo: A tall tower in the middle of a large city, full of monsters. The tower where he met Yashar, and his life truly accelerated.
Appearance:
Frenzy: Stride's neck would begin to overflow with saliva, oddly refraining from soaking his clothes, and it would spread around the arena floor, eventually igniting into a blazing red fire. This fire is able to be manipulated by Stride freely, and while it is limited by how frequent the area is, it can be focused into a large blazing fireball of pure heat. Stride's clothes char off his body, barring the set of mage robes that he wears, and he announces that he is the Gatekeeper to Hell, and he is accepting new residents.
The Bloodstained Blade - A fancy name for an ordinary sword. The only thing that's special about it is that it's colored red. In the event of a melee-encounter, Stride will fall back onto using this weapon.
The Xeno Staff - A summoning staff that allows the summon of one flying saucer minion, capable of shooting weak lasers at the opponent. There can only be one minion at a time, and they can be re-summoned when the existing one perishes.
Golden Shower - Get your mind out of the gutter! This spell tome casts a ray of golden light at the opponent, and if they are hit, they take increased damage from any source that hits them for a short period of time.
Life Drain - A staff that allows for decent damage off of other people and heals the caster, but is expensive to use in the Mana department.
The Mana Flower + 3 Mana Potions - Simply put, the Mana Flower allows for the automatic consumption of Mana potions, and each potion restores the caster's mana to full. (A paragraph with Life Drain automatically costs at least a single potion, and everything else costs about half of one. Stride get's 4 full cycles of Mana per combat session, including all the potions.)
Abilities:
Deathly Influence - Stride has seen his fate fall before him, and he has actually spoken to Death herself. Death had proclaimed she had a lot of money on Stride's accomplishments, and he should not disappoint her. As a result of Death's influence on Stride's life, he has gained a more resilient lock on his soul, and it will take a bit more to take his soul than the usual man.
No Neck - Not really an ability, but Stride can separate his head from his torso by taking it off. This was due to Death's plea for Stride's resurrection, and the way he went out caused irreversible damage to his neck. Stride's head is near harmless when in a combat scenario, but his body still is an independent entity, and will act as if Stride's head was still on it's neck.
Fighting Style: Take advantage of what you believe in, and remember why you are here. Stride is overly cocky during a fight, and will often rush into a situation without thinking, probably due to the misdirection that because he knows Death itself, he is immortal and believes it as such. More often than not, Stride will start out every fight by summoning a minion, and then proceeding to debuff his opponent and finishing it off with a constant spray of Life Drain. If need be, Stride will use anything he can find for cover when confronted with an opponent that is massively taller than he is, but he will still go headstrong in attempting to kill his enemy.
Personality: Stride is cocky and arrogant for the majority of the time, and constantly shows a bitter resentment towards humans and elves. Anybody else is okay, but humans and elves are the worst in his mind. Stride will wait and listen when he has to, but it's quite often that he'll divert from an intended plan in pursuit of a greater reward, and this showed once when he defended the life of a humanoid spider when an Orc tried to kill it, and he got his head chopped off in the process. Granted that wasn't the plan, but still.
Bio:
Stride was born in a region of his world where half-races were seen as being incredibly unholy and deserving of a lot of discrimination. This led to Stride leaving his home as soon as he could in pursuit of magical aptitude, and eventually getting caught up in the employment of Yashar, a powerful mage that needed a group of monsters to kill a group of heroes and retrieve this book. He also got cursed and constantly drooled, but that's besides the point. Before the actual quest started, Stride got his head chopped off and he met Death, who told him that he wasn't ready to die yet and he would be resurrected. Stride came back to life and helped get the book back, gaining vast knowledge over the world and eventually finding himself under the employment of Death again, who told him to enter this tournament and win in her name.
Wish: He wants to honor Death by winning the tournament and achieving total immortality.
Echo: A tall tower in the middle of a large city, full of monsters. The tower where he met Yashar, and his life truly accelerated.
Appearance:
Frenzy: Stride's neck would begin to overflow with saliva, oddly refraining from soaking his clothes, and it would spread around the arena floor, eventually igniting into a blazing red fire. This fire is able to be manipulated by Stride freely, and while it is limited by how frequent the area is, it can be focused into a large blazing fireball of pure heat. Stride's clothes char off his body, barring the set of mage robes that he wears, and he announces that he is the Gatekeeper to Hell, and he is accepting new residents.
Inventory: Phylactery
I did this when I was tired. Please be gentle if it's bad.
Well I was going to revive a character in hopes of him having a story arc to complement Bonesword, but I can whip up my only villain character a CS for NPC status.
On the topic of NPC characters, can I get one to be brought back? Not actually participating in the tournament but is more or less on the side and cheering on my actual combatant?
A thinker... was Overlook a thinker...? Honestly it kind of made sense. He didn't really feel a surge of technological power when he had been building the limp mass of metal and wires that was on the table, and after a bit it made sense. Maybe he really was a thinker, and he just needed the rig that he had constructed to fulfill his goals. He did name himself "Overlook" after all, so maybe that really was his purpose. To watch out for others when they needed it.
A loud clank of robot parts was pushed onto the floor after the legless teen arrived at the table, now sitting in his wheelchair. The only thing that the teen did not push off the table was a leg for the robot, made rather cleanly for an afternoon, and it looked like a proper leg for someone. Overlook grabbed it and placed it onto the nub that was once his leg, and it attached like it was perfect. It didn't move, swivel, or anything. It just stayed stationary and acted as a proper leg. The teen stood up, leaning against the nearby wall, and ticked at his laptop, which was once open onto a file that had the plans for the Eye on it. A request box was open, and Overlook was awaiting to ask for something to be delivered to him. It took a few seconds, but then the teen hit enter on what he wanted to be delivered.
>Ruben Manhattan : Requesting the computer that was in my bunker.
Gaia was happily watching the discord that was unfolding below the parking garage, but had been interrupted by a beep on her phone. Naturally, she took a look at what had been there on her phone, and her eyes widened beyond belief with what she saw.
A bounty. Put on Cassidy by the Bratva.
"Jackpot, bitches! I'm outta here!" "What's going on?" "The Bratva put a bounty on Cassidy. Pretty big one at that." "JACKPOT!" "Gonna head there and wait it out, sound good?" "It'll be quite a bit, but sure it'll work out."
Gaia quickly absconded from the garage, and was actually walking down the street towards the location where the bounty was to be received when all of a sudden she saw two dudes in a car speed past her like there was no tomorrow, all the while sirens wailed. Those fucks did some crime! Time to intervene with the crime that had been committed! Gaia was rushing towards the garage that the car had sped into when Dunn spoke up.
"What're you doing?" "Solving a crime. We do have time to spare before we really need to go get to Cassidy." "... I guess you're right. Get in there and see what's up." "Already on it!"
Kyoshi chuckled at the fact that people were pretty much doubting her for assuming that this snake-man was a bad guy. Well... they didn't say that they were doubting her, but she felt that they were. She chuckled even more when G4M3R got all giddy about Outsider's powers, and he even mentioned advertisements. Now that was interesting to Kyoshi, as what came to mind for her when G4M3R brought those up was something like a demonstration of powers or the team doing something good, but in reality it had consisted of two gearheads and herself at the time, and since she was new... well... it didn't make sense at the time to Kyoshi.
That was besides the point right now though, as a phone ringtone buzzed from Kyoshi's bag. Someone was giving a call to the Minutemen, and Kyoshi was the one who had to take it. She became the involuntary secretary of the group when she joined, and she had to take some of the calls that she had received. She walked over to the side of the building and answered the call, trying to sound proper as she did. "This is the Minutemen. Kyoshi speaking."
The Shroomblade - A katana with a scabbard that matches the crown on Bonesword's head, and the very sword that Bonesword was born with. It's his most favored weapon. From his past, this blade had acquired the taste of demon blood, and while it isn't a holy weapon, it is more effective against the flesh of a demon.
Religious Cutlass - A pale-cyan colored cutlass, found on a battle where the legendary swordsman faced against a deadly succubus. The cutlass is much like the Shroomblade, however it should be noted that it has the taste of holy blood instead.
Unleash - The final blade that the swordsman carries around, and the one that he's the most afraid of using. This is a jet-black longsword with a series of golden details embedded into the blade, and the only detail that Bonesword was given when he received it was that if he gave into his demonic instincts, he would be able to wreak havoc with this sword.
Mechanical Armor - A set of lightweight yet resilient armor, minus the helmet, that has Machina inspirations. It'll take a hit, that's for damn sure.
Abilities:
Master Swordsman - Bonesword has perfected the way of the blade, and it really shows in his fights.
Chloromancy - A fancy way of saying he can manipulate plants. There aren't any plants that he finds favorable to use, but he does often use trees as a way of defense and cacti as a way to attack.
The Bloody Harvest - All plants that are nearby gain sentience, and will attempt to complete the task that they are given without a second thought. If a minion dies or completes a task, it loses the sentience. If no plants are around, several plants will grow within a very short period of time. It should also be noted that pumpkins are usually reserved for musical purposes, be it battle themes or distractions.
Undeath - As long as Bonesword's skull stays intact, he retains his soul, and can still fight. If he has lost his body, he is able to take another skeleton's body as his own and use it just as good as the last one. While a skull, Bonesword is still able to use his Chloromancy, including Bloody Harvest, and the sentient plant is given the task of finding another body. It is limited to those two powers, however.
Enter : The Sharpswordsman - Bonesword can throw swordlike objects. or anything vaguely swordlike (sticks work). The thrown "swords" are incredibly accurate, and can do quite a hefty bit of damage if they land.
Honor Strike - Blaze any hostile enemies of demonic origin with a light of pure love and vengeance. Does not do damage to anyone holy, and does little damage to anyone unaffiliated. This ability can only be used in times where Bonesword is under extreme pressure and/or emotionally unstable.
Fighting Style: Defensively Merciful. Bonesword will stay on a defensive side for the majority of a combat session, and will not go on the offensive unless he knows that he can provide a damn strong offense. Bonesword will refrain from actually killing anybody unless he's in a frenzied state of mind.
In a battle, Bonesword will not give the first attack no matter what, and is more than happy to watch the enemy as he sits there and sips on a bottle of whiskey. He does not find any enjoyment in a cheap opponent, and will often shift between being a one-handed master of swords to being a dual-wielding flurry of enamel. Even if he is dual wielding, he will never dual wield a sword with Unleash, as Bonesword believes that the black longsword should be used with two-hands.
If the enemy is a ranged fighter, dash to the side and avoid their projectiles, then rush when they need to reload.
If the enemy is a big mass of destruction, stab it and hang on for your life. They'll try and hit you, and inevitably they will strike their own flesh.
If the enemy offers you mercy, you take that mercy and you leave.
If the enemy makes fun of your love, they do not deserve mercy and should be executed.
You cannot fly. Do not try to fly.
Stay defensive until you can actually dish out a hit, then go back to the defensive.
A good defense is a better offense, and should be treated as such.
Never underestimate your opponent.
Personality: Bonesword is an alcoholic skeleton man who will never let up until the task is done. He longs to be reunited with his lover that was taken from him decades ago, and fights for the protection of humans until he is struck down and slain. It's important to note that, while Bonesword is alcoholic, he can never actually get drunk due to the lack of any actual organs in his system.
Bio:
A long time ago, a single mushroom was growing in a forest. A purple mushroom, with green spots, and a very bone-like material as the stalk. Years later, a skeleton rose from the ground in that spot, his skull topped by the head of a mushroom, and his soul free. He began to roam the world that was resistant of the Nexus' influence, eventually finding a human settlement where he attempted interaction. After the attempt, he was hastily rejected due to his appearance being frightful. Saddened and discouraged, the skeleton roamed more, stumbling across a demon settlement, where they welcomed him as a brother. There he learned how to live for himself and how to care and defend people he loved.
Eventually the demons were enraged at the humans, who slaughtered the livestock and burned down a forest. When the skeleton heard the demons were going to go and pillage the humans, the skeleton was glad to join in the endeavor, and marched onwards to go and kill the humans who insulted him so long ago. Once they were there, the demons slew all of the men in the settlement, leaving only the women and children captured.
As the demons rejoiced in their victory, the skeleton couldn't help but feel remorse for what he did that day, how he killed those men, and what the demons were going to do to the women and children... Right before the unforgivable happened to those captured, the skeleton drew his sword in the name of justice, and defended the humans with all of his might. The amount of blood spilled that day was unforgettable and traumatic. The villagers did not know whether or not the skeleton wanted them all for himself or if he wanted to protect them, but either way they tried to slay him to avoid a bad situation in case of that. The skeleton fled, unwilling to hurt those humans, and returned to his life of roaming the lands in search of new people to meet.
Many years passed, and the skeleton got tired of roaming and finished off his life of that, making a small shelter in a cave off in a forest. It was a bit later when a human child found him when they were roaming the world. Much to the skeleton's surprise, the child did not run from the demon, rather thought he was funny-looking and treated him like a friend. The skeleton felt a sense of companionship, something he had been without for a long time, and a bond unlike most others was formed, where the two treated eachother like lovers, and when the child's village was attacked, the skeleton came out of hiding and defended every single one of the humans in that village, not letting a single one perish from a demon's weapon.
Every human but one, anyway. The child was slain by the brawniest, bloodiest, and most vile demon in the raid, who thought it would cripple the feelings of the skeleton and make him submit to the raiders. What followed that day was the first instance of an Honor Strike, and holy hell did it finish the raid. The skeleton was celebrated for his heroic actions by the humans, and was welcomed back into the village at anytime.
When the dead child's funeral was had, the skeleton took an oath. From that day on, he would defend mankind with his life, until either the day he died for good, or the day that mankind betrayed him again. Hopefully that doesn't happen for a long time.
Wish: Nobody knows why Bonesword actually wants to fight in this tournament, but many have believed that it is to regain the love of his life through this.
Echo: In a grassland area, far from the reaches of a civilization that is vastly more advanced, a grave is existing. This is the grave of Bonesword's lover.
Appearance:
Frenzy: Succumbing to his temptations, Bonesword becomes something he has called "The Lord of Bones", and is not to be trifled with. Full power over all plants is granted, and typically Bonesword likes to create obstructions and trap his opponent before he strikes himself, armed with Unleash. During this phase, the demon's eye sockets glow bright with flashing purple and green lights, and has a black shadow covering the side of his mushroom crown.
Inventory: - Phylactery. - 46. Watch : A clock of many faces --- Creates an internal database of organisms by scanning ones in proximity. Selects an organism when the wearer turns the watch face. Transforms the wearer into the selected organism's species when the wearer presses down the watch face. Reverts a transformed wearer when he or she represses the watch face
[center][h3][u]Well hello.[/u][/h3]
I guess I should introduce myself, huh.
I'm [color=00aeef]Gardevoiran[/color], just some schmuck going to college and working towards getting a degree in Fine Arts.
I do commissions and what-not, and you can ask me to do a commission for you through my Discord (Gardevoiran #1429) or up here through RPGuild PMs, and I receive donations and payment through my Ko-fi page. Clicking the box right below here will take you to it.
[url=https://ko-fi.com/U7U1HBS5][img]https://az743702.vo.msecnd.net/cdn/kofi1.png?v=0[/img][/url]
I'm a nerd. I play Pokemon religiously, I dabble in some anime, I write up here, and I love watching incredibly awful movies and just making fun of them. Specifically things like "Leo the Lion" and what not.
I don't have much else to say, so I guess I can leave you guys with a really bad joke.
"What do you call a cow with two legs?"
"Lean beef."[/center]
<div style="white-space:pre-wrap;"><div class="bb-center"><div class="bb-h3"><span class="bb-u">Well hello.</span></div><br>I guess I should introduce myself, huh.<br><br>I'm <font color="#00aeef">Gardevoiran</font>, just some schmuck going to college and working towards getting a degree in Fine Arts.<br><br>I do commissions and what-not, and you can ask me to do a commission for you through my Discord (Gardevoiran #1429) or up here through RPGuild PMs, and I receive donations and payment through my Ko-fi page. Clicking the box right below here will take you to it.<br><br><a target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener" href="https://ko-fi.com/U7U1HBS5"><img src="https://az743702.vo.msecnd.net/cdn/kofi1.png?v=0" /></a><br><br>I'm a nerd. I play Pokemon religiously, I dabble in some anime, I write up here, and I love watching incredibly awful movies and just making fun of them. Specifically things like "Leo the Lion" and what not. <br><br>I don't have much else to say, so I guess I can leave you guys with a really bad joke.<br><br>"What do you call a cow with two legs?"<br>"Lean beef."</div></div>