Avatar of Gardevoiran
  • Last Seen: 2 yrs ago
  • Joined: 10 yrs ago
  • Posts: 3231 (0.85 / day)
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  • Username history
    1. Gardevoiran 9 yrs ago
    2. ██████ 10 yrs ago

Status

Recent Statuses

7 yrs ago
Who here likes cuddles?
9 likes
7 yrs ago
If your girl can't crack your skull between her thighs then whats the point of even being a human being.
7 likes
8 yrs ago
Identities are confusing to figure out.
4 likes
8 yrs ago
How do wing.
8 yrs ago
Omae wa mou shindeiru.
3 likes

Bio

Well hello.

I guess I should introduce myself, huh.

I'm Gardevoiran, just some schmuck going to college and working towards getting a degree in Fine Arts.

I do commissions and what-not, and you can ask me to do a commission for you through my Discord (Gardevoiran #1429) or up here through RPGuild PMs, and I receive donations and payment through my Ko-fi page. Clicking the box right below here will take you to it.



I'm a nerd. I play Pokemon religiously, I dabble in some anime, I write up here, and I love watching incredibly awful movies and just making fun of them. Specifically things like "Leo the Lion" and what not.

I don't have much else to say, so I guess I can leave you guys with a really bad joke.

"What do you call a cow with two legs?"
"Lean beef."

Most Recent Posts

<Snipped quote by Banana>

Except not, if you look on the explanation above. Frog was just playing to Rufus' whims without even knowing.


He IS a puppet.
Frog, for some reason, kept respawning instantly in the throne room of hell. Which was weird.


Frog himself is weird. This is normal for him.
@Old Amsterdam
I'm alright with this, however if Spiffy is absent/caught up with work, I'd say that I post first as BS because he's the second-in-command.

It makes sense to me.
"By the gods... it's an ancient forge!" Ursaren scrambled into the area giddily, pulling out his notebook and sketching out every minute detail. The hammers. The rock islands. The forge itself. Everything! It was remarkable to the old man. "This must have been here for centuries!" The elderly man removed the upper part of his outfit, leaving on his trousers and revealing very well-toned (and slightly hairy) muscles from underneath. A large gash coated the upper right part of his pectoral, so he had to heal that away. He would've done it earlier, but there wasn't a good enough stopping point to do so. Plus, maybe some of the forge would rub off on him and improve him in some way.

A golden light surrounded Ursaren's wound as it slowly mended itself back together, the skin weaving itself like it was nothing more than a straw basket and eventually spreading over the wound like an artist would smudge his work to add effects. It was grossly interesting to watch, actually. It was like something straight out of a necromancers tower, although instead of melting flesh off, it was melting flesh to mend... as weird as that sounded.

"Do you think that anything is left here, comrades?"
Bonesword - Suddenly, Trees!

The mushroom skeleton's eyes lit up when he felt the sudden touch of a wooden deck with his viney appendage. He hit his mark, and he was able to work with that now. Whoever this guy was, whether he was a crabby man or a lobster guy, he was about to be in for a rude awakening.

You don't mess with the Red Rum Pirates and walk away without a few splinters.

"Kojo-Kojo Oaken Tree!" Bonesword shouted as a large oak tree shot up from Krabbe's ship, tipping it's bow towards the expansive ocean. Another tree sprouted up besides that one, and so did another, until the front of the ship was covered in saplings. They weren't growing super quickly, but they would be a serious problem if left untreated.

Bonesword felt the faint vibration of the ship's hull being hit by a torpedo as he steered, and the only idea he could think of at this point was to shout at Isuza (who recently jumped overboard to fix something) and tell her to fix the ship. She had enough materials for a sufficient patch-job, last time BS checked.

"Isuza!" Bonesword shouted at the top of his nonexistent lungs. "Patch us up!"
Tibulus walked over to the side of the bar, leaning against the wall as he looked out into the street. Smoking the cigar was a nice way to pass the time, especially if another one of his contacts came close and informed him of something else about the place. There was also the chance that if he went in there he'd cause a lot of heads to turn and some rude language to be thrown at him. Speaking of rude language...

"Alright y'fuckin shroombrain. Hand over everything y'got, and I'll make your death quick."

A ruffian came up to Tibulus, a large baseball bat held in his hand. It was pretty clear that he wasn't looking for a fight, rather just a simple robbery and killing before the work got too dirty. Tibulus raised his head, as his mushroom head was obscuring his sight, and he chuckled audibly. "You're taking to me, right?" The robber stuttered as he held his bat in both of his hands. "W-Well duh? Who else here has a head like yours, y'parasitic mutt!" A crowd began to form around the mugger and Tibulus, and the robber was ready to take this skeleton and rob him blind.

"Mutt. Such a guttural word, isn't it?" With a swift movement, Tibulus reached into the pocket of his jumpsuit as if he was going to pull something out, and the mugger immediately responded by swinging straight for Tibulus' head, preparing to kill with a single blow. The pilot dodged the attack with a single swift movement, pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket and swinging it in front of the robbers face. The robber was able to get a good look at what was on the piece of paper.

A single word.

LOSER.

The robber fell to the ground in a twitchy spasm as Tibulus jabbed his side with his finger, delivering a deadly shock to him and effectively tazing him into submission. As the crowd dispersed in mixed reaction, Tibulus calmly walked into the bar and went straight over to the counter, resting his arms on it and calmly watching for any oncoming dangers.
Bonesword - Driving Test

"Slick! As long as you don't hurt the ship, you have my full permission to do whatever you want! Now get ready to blast that ship!!" Bonesword shouted as he raised himself into the air slightly with some vines, holding him in the air so he can see over the wheel, if only a slightly. "Approaching quickly, Cap'! Prepare to fire!" Bonesword didn't really expect to be going through a driving test today, let alone something under so much pressure, but he felt confident in his abilities. He steered the ship over open water sometimes, so this was just like that, except not. Hopefully Isuza could do some repairs on-the-go.

While steering, the skeleton kid checked back on his vine to see how far it had gotten. It's still got a bit of a way to go, but it's somewhat close to the other ship. Maybe halfway, if not a bit more. It was only a matter of time before the skeleton could cause some major mayhem to that ship.

Man. This was quite the upgrade. Staying at the new nightclub in Hyperion was a serious step up from his current accommodations, although he felt like he'd hate walking to his workshop all the time. Maybe he could do some... smaller scale experiments in his place. Ones that didn't harm the structural integrity of

"Yes ma'am!" Bonesword barked as he checked his sides for his arsenal. Shield? Check. Shroomblade? Check. Cutlass? Check. Unleash? Not check. The swordsman must've left it behind at his workshop. Nevertheless, he was ready to hunt this Angelic SoB down and also slap whoever was in charge of the TEP organization for being kind of an idiot. He pushed the line once already, why would he risk it again?



Bonesword and Henry stood inside of the entrance to the new location of the TEP organization. He was ready to go in and stab this Angel in the heart, but he was also afraid that Henry would cause some spaghettification friendly-fire, so the supervising figure of the duo spoke up with some kind of "plan."

"Here's my idea. We go and capture this angel before he turns us into barbecue demons by means of just encasing him in a silvery cage or by tying him down with vines, then we go and shout at whoever runs this place and scold them for their dumb plan to try and take down this angel on their own. Feel free to stray if needed. Any questions?"
@Lmpkio@Inner Demon
CAPTAIN ZAK SPARROW!

Sorry! Couldn't resist!

In a flash, Bonesword was summoned (alongside Henry) to Eos's chambers, with Endian, the Meido Sisters, and Wolf there as well. The group was commended for their efforts at the Oblivion Dungeon first, but then the deal for Bonesword was sweetened.

"Thereby, I'm placing you, Henry Avaritia, on probation. You'll be placed under the watch and command of the most suited unit for this task. The only who won't be afflicted by any attempts of corruption that you may try to do, in case your intentions aren't genuine. By this I mean that Bonesword shall be the responsible for your fate within our ranks. Conversely, your actions will influence his fate as well."

Holy shit, that was unexpected. Bonesword didn't think that would ever happen, let alone with someone as powerful as Henry. That was just as awesome as it was problematic, considering the only Machina documents Bonesword could read off of Henry were that he's insane and prone to absolute destruction.

Then the deal got sweeter.

"This is a prototype bio-weapon, it's called Vulcan Yew, it has the capability of turning into a powerful bio gatling gun capable of shooting poisonous, armor-piercing seed-like projectiles. With your abilities you shall be able to master it and fight against heavily armored targets."

This made up for the bottles that were thrown at Bonesword when he first moved in. This would definitely be a plant that Bonesword would learn how to use within due time, and it gave him a few ideas for some more... advanced troops. Of course, they'd need some firm testing, but this new tool would prove amazing within due time.

>NEW PLANT - VULCAN YEW

This day was probably one of the best he had in a while. Botany was going great, Bonesword was put in charge of Henry, and now the Vulcan Yew was something added to his arsenal. The only thing left was a series of two questions Bonesword had. Two very important questions. He raised his hand to speak once Eos asked for any questions.

"Thank you very much for the new gift, Eos, but I have two questions. First, may I have permission to upgrade my current living conditions outside of Hyperion, maybe a small castle to help accommodate Henry better into the Machina? Second, is someone going to tell Alexi which button it is to open the front door?"
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