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12 days ago
Current I'm a pretty good writer and former site staff; I still deal with imposter syndrome every time I log on. You're definitely not alone. And t's worth trying anyway.
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12 days ago
Don't worry, D3AD ST4R, most of us feel like that. <33
3 likes
13 days ago
Pretty sure you just described a third of the world's population. Welcome!
2 likes
14 days ago
I just started watching it.
3 likes
21 days ago
I just finished The Secret History, a very Gen X book. Never Let Me Go before that, which I'd recommend to any writer outside the MFA atmosphere who wants to know emotonal restraint.
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argh.

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shoo, all of you.

mine.
The world was dark.

Not black darkness; that only lasted the first few moments of really dedicating yourself to it. Her body was form of consciousness and thought; there was no body. You could feel a body. It could be your own. It could be someone else's. Human society was structured around hubs of culture and geology. Even in distant places there were usually clusters. Networks of all the world's people. It stretched on and on and forever more. The great endless horizon that Makayla found she could stare at without tiring for as long as she allowed herself to do it, a horizon of darkness and darkness with the darkest shades of twilight shining with a similar if colder light.

Today there was no endless horizon. The darkness was there, but it always was, a constant dim filter on the metareality of her current moment. The lighting was fluorescent, the walls a semi-glossed wood panel, and there were flags lining the furthest wall. The one behind the large desk and the big bald man in a dark suit seated at the desk. There was a glow alive around him; very faded but very warm in a light orange. Instinct and memory told her warmth was good. Because the man closest to her, the smaller and younger of the two men, and seated with his back to her? He was bitter cold.

There was conversation but it washed over her like waves from the perspective of a fish far from the surface, a distant rumble that had no direct consequence on her current preoccupations. All of that snapped to a sudden and kinetic change the moment it registered with her subconscious lit up at the conversation at play between them. [i]"Some girl...young, very young like a teenager...taking steps..."

The cold man grew colder, and the warm man saw a drop in heat. Although the change was slight it was something she couldn't miss, not in the darkness where the visuals of the world bleed at the edges and dances like flame in a lazy vibration so slow unless you stared you would have missed it. That was the first thing she learned in the darkness of infinity; stopping and staring usually paid off in one way or another. Letting her focus and will power go free was a leap into the air for a first time flyer. Elevation was boundless, velocity a matter of feeling, and descent just a matter of time.

Staring at the cold one brought to her lips a gasp sharp enough to cut through even a metareality.

The cold man snapped forward from his seat, leaning to the desk and knocking pictures down flat onto the desk so they couldn't be seen by prying eyes. So I can't identify who this is. The warmer, older, bald man sitting behind the desk was beyond her reach. The colder younger man she only knew from last time. Unlike other people, she couldn't "reach" a person using the cold man as a go-between. Because he was a telepath, too, was her bet as to why.

You're not getting away this time.

It wasn't true last time. She got away after he said she wouldn't. After he said that she couldn't. At least Makayla had thought she did. Snapping into this moment, with these people, was like nothing that had ever happened before. Getting lost in it was so easy, so effortless, that she'd lost the fact that she didn't bring herself here. She thought not, until his reaction. He didn't bring her, either. The mystery was enough to snap her focus. She couldn't reach the man behind the desk, but the desk? It went up like a rendered 3D object suddenly given moon gravity.

It came down like a very heavy, very large, desk.

Still don't want me to run?

He couldn't. She knew it like she knew the size of the moon in the sky, a natural fact so obvious few could miss it. He was a telepath, but he wasn't, as he phrased it, "telekinetic." It was the last thing she remembered before the chill of the infinite and it's darkness became daggers, moments before it was so cold it burned. She was moving, the endless darkness howling with the sound of ambient thought replacing the sound of wind around her as she moved at velocities that gave her rope burn. She did the only thing she could do...she screamed as loudly as she could.

Everything was gone. The sound of a whispery quiet ceiling fan and the filtered and cooled air running from the ducts. Her world was a fluffy bed and a four post black wood bed, translucent white cotton canopy blurring the image of her bedroom. Her stomach turned, and her head dipped as pain cascaded around her brain. Her body moved out of the bed and into her bathroom six feet away in seconds. She spent the rest of the early morning throwing up. By the time she got up off the heated tile of her bathroom it was time to get ready for school.

She left her hair long and wavy and shiny, giving it free reign. Her top was a pale pink cotton blouse with three quarter sleeves and wore off the shoulders, exposing her gold tanned and one or two freckles on the back of her shoulder when her long sun lightened blonde hair wasn't covering one shoulder or another. Her jeans were black but faded and only slightly high on the waist. Her shoes were black All Stars with pink accents and stitching. She arrived early so she could help start processing the freshman cheerleaders. She even had her own key to the cheer equipment room.

That was a trip. Each time she met a new freshman girl, it was like she got splashed with feeling. Makayla wasn't looking, and just let it all roll of her back, but it was an interesting way to form first impressions. Some girls seemed very closed off, some just terrified, others excited and open, but all of those were just surface level. Beneath a stormy sea of emotions and thoughts alive and burning brighter than usual: new school years. Especially freshman year. For Makayla it wasn't quite the same. She was a junior, and her social life was over.

Some freshman didn't seem to know. A few thanked her, personally, finding it cool "Makayla Hall" woke up early to help out the new crop of cheerleaders. Makayla stared, before trying to only chuckle kindly at the girls. Whatever her reputation it didn't seem too badly injured at cheer. Then she roamed the halls, unable to perceive much of anything because of the interjections. Samantha. Jessie. Lauren B, Lauren R. Kinzie. Rachel. It wasn't just the girls, either, Bradley, R.J., and Shane. Most wanted information. Rachel was really angry, and thought Makayla should know it. Being born to wealthy parents didn't entitle her to treat people that way, the girl told her. Makayla agreed, Rachel's eyes narrowed.

That was painful. Rachel was amazing, and Mak loved her dearly. R.J. was difficult only because it was hard not to talk to him. She'd always talked to him in the morning, since kindergarten. So she asked about his summer, and at least tried until he brought up drama. She had to curtail the conversation there, it felt weird, it felt wrong. Much like her entire life right now: weird and wrong.

She skipped the assembly and got high with Eli behind the cafeteria. Even though she hadn't indulged, her mind kept processing. She had a tension headache by lunch. There was simply too much stimulus for a telepath at a highschool; at least when so many people seemed to think and feel in your direction. She heard snippets all day. The cutest was a freshman boy that thought she was the sexiest thing alive. The worst was one senior girl being disgusted at the sight of the "bitchy little rich girl."

That was all before lunch.

The peach flavored blunt was bliss. Her mind washed clean, her muscles relaxed, and everything seemed to reset. Her vibe was right. She spent lunch and most of the next period in a daze, pretending to read in the library. Coming out of the library she hit Ashley in the hall, or rather, she walked to her locker and found Ashley there. The hug was a little forced, but only a little.

"Where have you been?"

Makayla paused, but only a single beat, "I got high with Eli. I spent lunch reading in the library."

"Nobody's very happy today, Mak," Ashley's green eyes darted that way and the other, before bouncing back to Makayla and sinking into the sight of her best friend, "I know you've heard it, but you also spent most of the summer in the rain forest with your mom. Which is only just a little weird, so you don't know everything."

Ashley's arms were crossed, she looked nervous. Makayla smiled the moment she took a peek. "I don't care if you date John. You're too sweet sometimes."

The red headed girl threatened to smile, but there was still edge in her eyes, "Ready to talk to me? You know, me? Your sister? The person who loves you forever?" Guilt panged. The hug was only slightly forced, she told herself, but the girl continued at Makayla's hesitation in response, "You're either a lesbian and in love with me, which I'd like to think I'd see coming, or you're a vampire, or you were bit by a radio active spider, or--"

Makayla's head tilted, "--this fascination with scenarios that involve me being bitten..."

"You know what I mean. Eventually you're going to tell me. I don't believe your parents are breaking up. I know you didn't get knocked up. Know what my theory is?" Ashley asked, the tone in her voice suggesting Makayla was going to hear that theory whether she objected or not, "I think you're trying to protect everyone. I think you either got sick, or you're 'Hyper', and I think I'm not far away from starting to take the unsolved mysteries a little personally."

"Ashley, wai--" Makayla sighed, the girl vanished behind the hallway highway of bodies but she still followed her best friend down the hall. Able to see her even when she couldn't physically see her. Her locker swung shut without being touched, and she walked away trying to clear her head. The next class was math, Natalie shocked her by asking for help, shocking only after some of the things Natalie had said about Makayla since the start of summer. She left math a little early to slip into student council, but that was literally a mere check in before slipping out. Brynn looked freaked the fuck out, that made Makayla smile. Poor kid.

The next class was...whatever. She had mostly forgotten, but she did approve of the location: Makayla was one of the people that got the Loft back into working condition, having spent a Saturday cleaning it out and cleaning it up. She was only sad it had official use now. Makayla and some of her friends had their own uses for it the year before. That was all Makayla found herself approving of about the class. It was an intrusion on her schedule, a class spot better used for something that would directly assist her college plans. Makayla had all the recommendations she could possibly want. Her father promised her she'd be in another class by the end of the week.

Until then...an empty classroom that was locked before she unlocked it sans key was her hide-away, locking it away. In the dark, cool, silent empty classroom it was easy for her mind to let go and reach out. She hit a few spots around town, including her parents, checking on loved ones, before curiosity got the better of her. The Loft, the class, Social Conscience. The question wasn't difficult for her: mankind had become fully conscious in ways animals had not. Animals were not, by rule, working separate of nature. They fit within the greater context of the natural world. Mankind was a part of nature that operated outside of that natural world. They were the only creatures that did.

Makayla never stopped wondering if the conscious minds she interacted with weren't all just nature's biggest mistake.

Jonas all but stopped her heart when he addressed. Her eyes widened to the size of saucers. Her jaw dropped. Luckily she did both in a dark, empty, classroom. She didn't notice it was Aiden that Jonas just happened to be looking at in the moment, she just responded via the mind of the person that Jonas was looking at when he said her name. Cool, casual. "Sure. I'll pop by in a minute."

In the dark, empty, classroom Makayla grabbed her dazzling purple glitter cheer backpack and made her way out of the room and up to the Loft. It didn't even quite take a minute, but she didn't exactly rush, so the minute was close enough. The door to the Loft wasn't locked, and that seemed a mistake to Makayla given just what the class was she was walking into. It took Jonas calling her out for her to figure it out, to take a few peeks and confirm it.

Makayla opened the door and walked in, the door closing behind her without being touched, it's lock turning into place after the door had firmly closed. Her eyes went from Jonas, to Aiden, where she seemed to visibly frown even if it just for a heartbeat before she flicked her long lashes back in Jonas' direct. "I have a hall pass. Don't test me." Her tone wasn't light, but it was hard to miss the mystery of the smirk that played at the edge of her pink glossed lips or the tease such a thing implied even as she walked away from him and sat in an empty seat closest to her, her eyes going back to Aiden, her backpack dropping by her feet.

She was still seeing heat flare off him like he was a sun.
I’ve actually called a few GoT games “High Advanced” in the past.
There wasn't any race. The moment Yanci pateintly walked into the four car garage and plucked the purple key with the black stripes, any race was over. Midnight purple low gloss paint over the steel skin and frame of the 1971 Plymouth Hemi Barracuda. The interior was black leather, it's age on par with that of it's kindred owner with the care that went into it's upkeep. Bucket seats and a dash from another age in human history, and all Yanci had to do was wait for Henry to get in. He wasn't far behind. A side glance when he sat revealed his grin, and instantly she knew why.

Yanci had given Eva this car as a birthday present. Of course she'd take this one. 425 Horsepower and 490 ft-lb of Torque didn't hurt either.

Didn't hurt for her that she was a better driver than Gwen. 'Catlin' was an expert driver, and was tasked with everything from stealing cars to driving get-away cars. She was one of L.A.'s best for decades, and was apparently the source to some pretty wild theories from the LAPD. None, according to one of her favorite LAPD contacts, were even remotely close to the simplicity of the truth. Back wheels smoked grey, and there was no point to music or talking while the race was on: the car's massive engine was simply too loud. At the occassional traffic light Yanci simply looked at Henry and smiled, wondering to herself if she could hide her fear in front of him, or hide anything from him.

Just driving Lucifer to the chic kindred watering hole.

A side road, a daring dash through a back alley, and a careful dart through a massive parking lot got Yanci all the room she'd need to rub Gwen's face in it. Parking wasn't even difficult, which seemed to Yanci like some kind of club owner magic trick, given the LA way of things. Parking was so primordially evil not even Henry, not even Lucifer himself, could be be held responsible. The Plymouth hugged up against the curb across the street from the club. A long haired hispanic man with height and weight to him stepped out from the small gallery across the street, an old brown biker jacket over a black buttonup mixed with a pair of gray LeBron 15's at the bottom of old blue jeans. Yanci had added a black denim jacket that didn't quite reach her waist, something tucked in the car--something she was actually putting on when the man stepped up to the curb. Smiling.

"Yance."

The Tremere 'boss' of LA was jumped, the hug so fast and without regard to gravity that Mateo was forced a few steps back on the sidewalk. With awkward happiness Mateo helped her down, laughing at her. "I know it's been a while girl, but damn...Henry." Mateo offered Henry a quick wave, before a weight pulled itself down over her former coterie mate's features. "Listen, Yance, I'm sorry for the distance but I think we both know why."

She had never blamed him for that. "No, it's okay Matty. Promise."

"Good. I've seen Eva. Not directly, but the chantry have seen signs of her. In looking deeper into things...something is here. It's not just India. The Camarilla and the Sabbat both are--"

It was a good time to step in, she thought, "--Gehenna is coming, Matty. I know Eva's active in one way or another, even if not physically. I've spoken to her. She's the one who told me it's coming."

His brown eyes squinted, a few moments of silence as his brain worked it out. "Think she could be wrong? Gehenna is a web of threads, of countless small actions and incidents weaving into larger events at just the right time to have their impact. Then again, India..."

"Something else is going on, Mat. Stay low, and please stay safe." She'd lost so many of their coterie to final death in the chaos and conflict of the past few years. Now Gehenna? Thanks, LA. There wasn't much else she could say to him here, in the open. He only surprised her by reaching in to hug her before saying goodbye, and escaping back into the small gallery. Except when the gallery's glass door closed behind him, there was no sign of him. Yanci tilted her head at the bizarre sight, only to chuckle at Matty-O the Magician.

"Ready, Henry?"

Before he could answer the Ferrari pulled up, it's windows down as an impossible bass beat came out deafening before being turned down to simply annoying. Gwen leaned over Sam, and glared at the Plymouth. "You're a cheater, Yanci. I'm going to park. See you guys inside." The Ferrari prowled forward before turning behind the building. Yanci finished fixing the cuffs to her denim jacket sleeves, a quick smoothing of her long hair over the jacket with her left hand, and she was thanking Henry for opening the door to Gallery 66. Of course when she stepped in and took a look around, the first thing she saw?

Nicolaus.

Of course. "Nicky," was all that slipped from Yanci's full glossed pale pink lips as she passed within biomes distance of the Ventrue, before stopping just past him, her chin tilting in his direction without ever turning back to see him, "you will have to tell me all about your recent drama in my city. Later." Maybe it was pettiness, maybe it was the singe of an old flame, but Yanci never did address the woman with him before moving on, hearing the door behind her as Gwen and Sam stepped in, looking like a couple of the Hollywood types that they were. Yanci made a beeline to a back booth, watching the scene as Gwendalyn all but smirked as she saw Nicolaus, greeting both the Ventrue and the girl with him before heading back to the booth, the tall blonde peeking on tippy-toes to find exactly who to ask about a drink.

"I think they'll come soon, Gwen."

The woman snickered at her. "Oh but it's never soon enough, sweetie."
Considering Carol or Wanda.


A R T I C

May 16th, 2019 - Morning | The Fortress of Solitude


Sanctuary, start log.

"It has a name: The Fortress of Solitude. Kal had set up some rudimentary security and DNA recognition. The door just let me right in. Wouldn't have mattered, the moment I saw Kryptonian architecture peeking out of an incredible mass of ice was my first moment of pure joy on this planet so far. I'm still smiling; my cheeks hurt. It's...it's like finding a single shelter in a storm that's taken everything else."

The sudden, jarring, jerk from happiness to tears in her eyes was short. Lose everything else in your life but yourself and an A.I. and a ship, a bitter thought from a bitter girl. She was trained for this. She knew better than to wallow. She never slept. When she did, she dreamt of home. When she woke, all she could do was curl up and cry. It was dizzying. Everything become nothing. She had begged him to make the make the dreams go away. He couldn't imagine the pain, she would think, but somehow even that fell flat at the sight of the pale...thing. He wasn't human. He called himself a god.

Kara didn't believe in gods. She could never become a god.

It was no small blessing she arrived late only to find Kal dead. Had she found him self-proclaimed and all powerful, she would have had to save him. Or kill him. It was the mission; she wasn't a baby. She was a fully mature, fully trained Kryptonian scientist. Her parents and aunt and uncle had spared her nothing. Ever. She couldn't let emotion keep her from her sparing any Kryptonian survivors. That humans seemed to believe Kal and she the only Kryptonian survivors, and her family all seemed to agree there would be more than just the two of them, something had to give.

"When I walked in I had Superman come to greet me. Pretty shocking to see him as he was when he died, as an adult. Kal clearly got his hands on some Kryptonian tech, but our 'memory' tech? That was something of a surprise. It was considered cutting edge even towards the end. We played around with it, but really it was much more Jor-El's thing. More like a hobby than a full time pursuit. But there he was, in full form and talking to me. Turns out Kal-El discovered in a log of his ship that his ship was in communication with another Kryptonian vessel. The wormhole that swallowed my ship whole was registered on his vessel's long range scanners, such as they were. For the last twelve years of his life he was watching for me. Waiting for me."

There was no chair in the main chamber. Kal-El grew up without the need to rest, but Kara was always rather fond of curling up in a big chair and doing work there. "Sanctuary and I will start working soon enough. I'll probably leave Sanctuary here, at least the core. Someone has an insanely large antenna aimed at this location: like they expect Kryptonian technology to work on the same primitive radio waves of Earth. As charming as it is naive." Kara chuckled into the log; something of a no-no in log taking etiquette. If her old Professors wanted to come scold her for the chuckle, they were welcome to.

"Superman's memory was very kind, and gave me a tour before beginning to glitch. Kal was no technician, I was more surprised his memory functioned at all. I don't think the core seals were ever removed--I don't think Kal knew that there were cores in all this 'crystal' structure. So I popped the seals and peeked in the housing. There's damage to the Kryptonian cores. Crystal cores, fancy stuff, but I can make repairs. I might need some materials, and that's where this all gets wildly interesting."

She turned on her heel, coming face to face with the biggest shock in the Fortress. "The capital of Krypton was thought destroyed. It happened in the early stages of our annihilation; no one away from the capital knew what happened, or how. Now I find the capital of Kandor in some sort of...bottle. I thought it was a model, but further study proves that's very much not the case. Sanctuary tells me it has it's own atmosphere, including it's own mini-red sun. The technology required for this is astounding, and far beyond what Kal was capable of. So how did it get in the bottle? Who/what took it from Krypton before destruction? I spent two years in Kandor while attending classes. Do I have friends in there? Old professors? It offers only questions, no answers. There's a device that allowed Superman to shrink down and enter the city; that's great, and all, but it won't work for my genetic sequencing. Not yet, at least. That's another thing on my 'to-do' list, and a pretty big one. So is the question of whether or not to tell the Kandorians what they're into. Think the Batman knew Kal was keeping about six million Kryptonians in a bottle in his frozen crystal fortress? I'm guessing not, considering how freaked out the guy was just to find out I was a reality."

Kara sighed at the bottled city, but the sigh wasn't all trauma and sadness. Wistful, half-hopeful, even. Suddenly Kara didn't feel alone. She wasn't. Six million was a proper re-settlement campaign. Kryptonians weren't destroyed. Kandor could be a seed to plant. On Earth? It seemed unlikely, to say nothing of highly against Kryptonian ethics, a thought that only frustrated her as she moved out of the vault and into a smaller chamber. It held a chair, closer to a crystalline throne, and giant tablets of an extremely heavy metal with Kryptonian writing seared into the otherwise smooth, shiny surface. "I found Kal's log, although it reads more like a personal journal. I've had Sanctuary download his voice from his 'memory', and the journal entries: I'll listen to them in his own voice. He didn't realize he was about to die."

Kara felt hot. A neat trick in a Fortress that would give Queen Elsa envy issues, but Kara knew exactly why: Kal's death. That thought led to the end of her own personal log, "Kandor changes everything. My mission, my intentions, but Sanctuary will need time. I believe we have a lead on where Kal got it, but we'll need time to follow up, maybe even have to 'borrow' a human satellite. One of the long range telescopes. So that becomes my second priority, while maybe illogical and unethical, my first priority becomes how Kal was murdered. I have to make sure what murdered him was murdered right back. My parents would gasp at hearing me say those words, but it's amazing how violent I feel at seeing the human video records of my baby cousin being beaten to death. If it was murdered back, I have to make sure there are no remains. Nothing to come back and haunt the universe ever again...luckily I have something of a lead there, too. Kal's records indicate a break-in of his Fortress. Given the feeble security here, I'm not shocked, but the trail leads back to a LexCorp. It happened after Kal's death, and they tried to tamper with Kryptonian records. They tried to alter his early reflections on the creature that would be his murderer. Delete the record? Maybe? It's hard to say, they did such a bad job with Kryptonian programming."

It was when she passed on to the last room that Kara re-discovered her smile, her fingertips delicately petting the metallic surface of the little robot. "I found Kelek. How Jor-El's pet robot got here...I can't wait to ask it. When it saw me it started giving off an alarm, the same proximity alarm Jor-El programmed into Kelek after I tampered with it for fun, so that I was never able to get close to Kelek unsupervised again." A memory that both made her laugh, and roll her ice-blue eyes. "Kelek only stopped when I told him Jor-El was gone. It was like the little thing forgot, and suddenly remembered. Kelek was pretty heavily damaged, I'm guessing he was always corrupted since the trip to Earth, but there's...damage on his exterior."

Her fingertips passed over dings and burn marks on his casing. "Weapons fire. This 'LexCorp', I am thinking. I can fix Kelek. It'll be good to have the extra help when Sanctuary and I start really digging into the reconstruction of this Fortress...this is my home on Earth. Everything else will be a satellite: I turned in my keys to the Boston apartment. Sanctuary purchased me a 'flat' in Metropolis, and now I'm headed out to the west coast of this human nation Kal lived in. Sanctuary found evidence on the planet's data networks of LexCorp files regarding Kryptonians, and it's a good place to start, since apparently Sanctuary can't actually hack LexCorp without setting off alarms. Pretty impressive, for humans. Sanctuary can find ways around the security on LexCorp's system, but we don't have the time. I need Sanctuary putting the majority of it's power into the Kandor problems, and into shoring up this Fortress, in preparing the upgrades. So that means me doing more fieldwork. Wish me luck. Kar'a Zor-El, head of House El, end log three."
@Ruby I'm working on a scene right now with Comet walking around in the Metro Tower if you want Supergirl to stop by? You gonna have her affiliated with the Titans or with the JLU?

- Ω


Sure, maybe she can offer to help them out if they ever need it.
All I can promise right now is a scene, but I'd thought it would be good to ask this here instead of Discord:

anyone want Kara for a collab scene? I can make an opening in her story for a meeting, if anyone's wanting interaction.

Let me know <333
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