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8 yrs ago
Current Malfunctioning Space Toilet (favorite death post in RPG) : roleplayerguild.com/posts/4…
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10 yrs ago
Example of a "Character Flaw": roleplayerguild.com/posts/32..
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The characters and content in general here are quite spiffy, indeed. Kudos all around. I am curious to note, when and if we all manage to start pushing in the same direction, how we're going to deal with personality and alignment differences.

@Double
Not even going to give me the benefit of a "Livin' La Vida Loca"? That makes me a sad Squatcho.
Johnathon Keystone

Location: Crossed Swords Inn & Tavern, Private Rooms (2F)
Interacting With: Femnal, Barmaid


Keystone had been on the road for quite a while. Walking, no less, not counting that time he hopped on the back of a feed-bearing farmer's wagon in exchange for moving a cow out of the road. The resulting overestimation of bovine durability ensured that both he and the farmer ate well for the next few days. Regrettably, he had to shell out coin to the herd animal's owner, but he was rather quick to settle monetary negotiations with a man who had barehanded a cow to unnatural demise.

Victory over beef aside, he wanted privacy and a bath. Definitely the bath.

The massive brawler slid a single gold coin across the table at the diminutive Innkeeper and accepted the key with a nod. "Let me know when that's out. I 'preciate."

He flagged down the serving lady that tended to his needs earlier with an eyelock and raised finger. "I'll be taking by happys upstairs then, Miss. Changed my mind about the suds, but if'n you could send up somethin' to sip in a bit, I'd be grateful. Something local, with a floral bouquet, what can peel the stink offa goat." His colorful underclass accent was certainly in sharp form that night, if nothing else.

Keystone shouldered his pack and tucked his knife away. With something akin to grace, he consolidated what remained of his supper onto a single plate and carried everything upstairs to his new lodgings.

It wasn't a grand vacation suite located in the heart of a great trade city, but it would suffice for his needs. With some caution, Keystone shut his door behind him and peered through the window's shutters. It gave him some bearing as to where his room was located overall in the building, but alas did not afford much of an outside view aside from what he saw coming into the Crossed Swords. Again, it would suffice.

The burly fighter noticed with some surprise that there was, in the adjacent room, a brass tub already mostly filled with steaming water, towels laid out, as if he was expected. He'd have to ask someone how this was managed later, but for now, Keystone seemed to recall a parable about a Gift Horse and where one shouldn't immediately look thereon.

Keystone wasted no further time in stashing his pack near the tub and stepping out of his grand leather coat, boots, and clothing. In quick moments, the traveling breaker of mens' skulls was settling into almost-too-hot water and scrubbing the rigors of analog translocation from himself.

From deep within his abdomen, a curious rumbling noise sounded, as if someone were playing a muted frame of fleshy bowling and had just picked up a lingering spare.

"Provide m'own bubbles, eh?" Keystone mentioned aloud to no one at all, "I don't think I'll be havin' a choice in the matter..."
Johnathon Keystone

Location: Crossed Swords Inn & Tavern
Interacting With: A Plate of Food, Femnal


Keystone smiled an appreciative thanks for the food, simple though it was. Not that he regarded simple food negatively; one of the worst things one could do, in his opinion, was try to prepare a meal above one's ability. Besides, getting to know a particular item of epicure, and understand it for what it is (and what it is not) was infinitely easier when it was not overly spiced or smothered with gravy. Simple and honest tavern fare should never be something for which to apologize.

No, the only issue with this meal was the gesture of gratitude the large man gave when it was served. Unaccustomed to expressing himself in an outwardly manner, Keystone had been attempting recently to show some manner of emotion in his daily life that didn't involve anger. The main pitfall to his attempts to do so being that he had what scholars would one day refer to as "Anger Issues". A bubbling cauldron of seething rage simultaneously fueled him and made him wary of the safety of others in his presence; he recognized that his size and conditioning made his immediate vicinity perilous were he to ever drop the reins of his temper and allow it amok.

Yes, the errant pugilist's warm and pleasing smile looked more like an expression exposing the secret internal machinations of a disturbed sausage-grinder who'd just had certain congresses with the Mayor's wife and set fire to City Hall. Keystone needed more practice in front of a mirror, else he should merely be content with his own limitations thusly.

Keystone unslung his pack and set it down between himself and the bar, his right foot casually perched atop to deter the curious and/or dishonest. He produced a rather large bone-handled knife from the back of his belt, shiny and pristine as if it had never been used, and proceeded to have at the chunk of fine, roasted flesh in front of him with it. He always tried to use his own blade, if he could.

Midway through his meal, he acquired the attention of the Inn's proprietor, Femnal, and politely (as polite was possible for the man, anyway) inquired as to his establishment's services.

"Evening, little master. I'm grateful on the food n' ale, sir, and I'm wanting to get a room. And a bath. Definitely a bath. Big sudsy one." He paused for a moment, regarding the nature of this somewhat isolated, frontier town."P'raps you'd be as kind as to tell me a little 'bout the options?"
Bag of Shadowy Goo.

...outstanding.
<in his best Monty Burns voice>

"...Excellent..."
Some few seconds into the sales pitch, Keystone remembered that he had procured new set of footwear from the Xiang temple two days earlier. He felt rather foolish, forgetting something as obvious as this, but let Gael finish vocalizing his thought without interruption. Quietly, he thanked the bootmongering Gnome for his time, mumbling something about checking for a clunky Orc-crafted ironwood oxford he thought he saw near the raisin cake merchant two or so blocks down. "Good for stomping!" he mused, formed a quick apology, and started about his merry way.

At Kai's leatherworkery, Keystone shot a puzzled look at the Master of Expired Animal Skin Crafting. Whereas it was possible that he did not fully articulate the nature of his order, it was likewise possible that the craftsman had something specific in mind. Much as Rocksteady's work with metal was an exercise in trust for the generally untrusting Keystone, perhaps this man would bear similar results in his chosen medium.

After a few seconds of hard stare, Keystone produced 25 platinum coins and set them in front of the Kai. "Right and proper, Tradesman. I ain't the wealthy type. Bit of good luck I'm exchanging for something practical in the long-term. Now, if we have an accord, do you have anything else what could benefit a man in my position? Bit of a browse, maybe? I do appreciate good leather."

The pugilist replaced his coinpurse as it was earlier, and shot a final question. "You seem like the kinda man that could recommend an honest 'enchanter', what can do the job you mentioned. Anyone come to mind?"
Johnathon Keystone

Location: Arriving at Salarn - Crossed Swords Inn & Tavern
Interacting With: Militia, Barmaids


A silhouette came into view, steadily trudging toward the southern gate to Salarn in the dying light of the evening. A tall, broad silhouette, walking with solid steps ever closer to the assembled militiamen guarding the one remaining ingress to the town proper. Each footfall packed the earth beneath it down with a wet, gravelly crunch; a heraldic drum beat, signalling an event to come, simultaneously too rapid for comfort yet slow enough to build maddenning anxiety.

The figure walked alone, never speaking, never straying from its beeline to Salarn. A feeling of ominous weight fell upon the ramshackle guards of the evening's watch. The figure was close enough now to discern some detail; it was respectably large, most likely male, wearing a hooded long coat of crafted hide, tooled and segmented into cunning armor. A bulky travelers pack hung from the stranger's back, swaying gently to the cadence sounded by his thick black boots all the while. The man carried no obvious weaponry. As an observational irony, this fact seemed to make him more daunting, rather than less.

The stranger was almost on top of them now - he stood at least a head taller then any of the men assembled in stalwart defense of their town, possibly a foot broader. The militiamen stood at shaky attention, determined to halt the progress of their latest arrival.

"You.." the watch sergeant chirped, before regaining composure fully, "You there! State your business in Salarn! Quick about it!"

The open hood of the man swiveled toward the voice, and issued a bass, noncommittal response, "Hungry." before parting open the hem of his coat to administer a much wanted, in depth scratching session to his posterior.

He stepped forward. The guards fell back a step in response, but had the presence of mind to grab for their weapons, irregular in issue. Obviously, these men were not satisfied with his response. The large man sighed loudly and pulled back his hood. The results, to the chagrin of the militiamen gathered, were no less intimidating.

It was a man, after all. Scarred, possessed of close-cropped dark hair and about a week of unapologetic facial stubble. Scars intersected at various points of his blocky features; features which now showed a scowl of impatience and steel-grey eyes.

"Bloody 'ell is this bronzecockery about, then?" he growled in a decidedly urban underclass accent.

For a moment, the stranger considered the effort it would take to shake the watch sergeant unconscious, then use him as a flail to beat the rest of his men into submission. Possibly afterward, he'd sit on the bastard's head until he woke, and open the vaporous contents of his lower intestine to blast the man back to blessed sleep with styxian ass-air. The consideration was fleeting; such an action would be ultimately counterproductive. No, he would have to use his practically non-existant people skills here.

"Name of Keystone. I'm fresh out of a conflict 'gainst an army of the dead, some many leagues east of here. I need ale, food, and rest, in that order, and you're standing between me and it. 'xcuse."

While not the most eloquent of speeches, it served well enough to gain him unchallenged entrance. A few steps inward, he strained his ears to catch any snatch of conversation that would point him in the right direction. After a short while, he found that he was headed in the right direction anyway; straight north to the center of town. The hub of activity. the place where he could bet a tankard of something bitter-sour and foamy, maybe some food.

His pace quickened. Now that Keystone knew where to go, the fun lay in getting there. From a distance, he spotted the sign of the Crossed Swords, and heard the merriment coming from within. This was his kind of place.

Before entering, something caught his eye. A glimmer on the edge of his visual perception, something incidental he had been looking for. A general goods store. He jogged in, lightened his coinpurse just a bit, and exited with two ledger-style books, blank, and appropriate writing materials. Many things in time of war get bought out or confiscated. Luckily for him, tools of literacy are rarely among them.

Keystone returned to the Crossed Swords, ever so slightly more optimistic about this hamlet, and found an unoccupied seat at the bar. The proprietor seemed a touch busy being boisterous and charming, so the large man caught eyes with a nearby serving lady, and beckoned her over.

"Evening, miss. I'm needing something stout and hoppy in a large mug, and keep 'em coming. If you lot've got anything ready to eat in back, I'd be much appreciative.

The barmaid returned quickly with the ale, promising a short wait on food, and moved to attend other customers. An afterthought struck the burly fighter, prompting him to call after his alehouse hostess, "Ey, Miss! I thought I heard chatter about a Temple on m'way in. Any Monk-folk about, as you're knowing?"
@Lady Amalthea

Before my first post, would I be permitted to change my color code for my CS and dialogue text? I've got a very spiffy goldenrod in mind.
The massive pugilist gave the area a once-over before engaging the leather merchant. Window shopping, mostly. Getting an eye for prices for when he returned. Speaking with a craftsman about a bit of custom work was one thing, but Keystone didn't want to needlessly advertise that he was carrying a good amount of coin.

After noting an acceptable pair of reliable metal-shod boots at Zhek's at might fit him, Keystone noted the asking price, thanked the man for his time, and moved to his intended destination. The once about gave him the opportunity to scope Kai's place before approaching, seeing if anyone shady was hanging about, etc.

"Ey, ain't meaning to interrupt your work there... a Lady Saran sent me to find you, if your name's Kai. Says you're the best at what you do, won't bleed me dry, neither."

Keystone removed his hand from his pocket, only partially exposing his rather full moneypurse. After tapping it with his thumb, sounding a quiet but beautiful clink of worked platinum and gold tapping against one another. The sweet but brief music of purchase and sale concluded with Keystone slipping the bag back into his pocket, hand still resting atop.

I've got need of a master's hand at leatherwork, y'see. Looking for reinforced hide with maximum protection and unfettered freedom of movement. I've got specifics if'n you've got the time, sir."

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