Recent Statuses

25 days ago
I was told to check my attitude. I did. It's still there. It's not gone anywhere. What's the problem?
28 days ago
My mother and I fed a homeless man tonight. My heart shattered into pieces when she told me she'd seen him around not doing well. He's young too. I should feel good, but I'm terribly worried now.
2 mos ago
There are two kinds of people in this world: "It isn't happening to me, so I don't care" and "It should never happen to anyone and that's why I care".
3 mos ago
Not today, Satan....maybe tonight
5 mos ago
I may not be the prettiest or funniest woman out there but let me tell you something, I'm also not the smartest.


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Most Recent Posts

I have a case of misheard lyrics for a lot of songs. One of the funniest ones that comes to mind is STP's Sex Type Thing. Instead of "I said you shouldn't have worn that dress, worn that dress", I heard "I said you shouldn't have the wrong address, wrong address". It cracks me up every time, and that's why I like reading lyrics every now and then.
Yesterday I had the misfortune of getting a 1st degree burn on my chest. My own spent casing ricocheted off my partner to my right and bounced into my shirt. My hands were occupied for roughly a minute so that sucker just burned me as it was stuck in place. I had a blister and all, but it popped on its own overnight.
Few months ago my cousin was playing CoD on mobile and I decided to download the app to check it out and relive the good old days. I was on a team with all the low ranks like myself but I came out in first place consecutively. When I played with my cousin, who was a high rank, I got 2nd or 3rd place. Good times.
I watched S1E1 of Money Heist before bed yesterday and I dreamt I was planning to rob a bank alone. The dream ended prematurely, but I would've liked to see it play out.
My relationship with sweets is best described by Metallica's Master of Puppets. Me being the puppet, of course.
My meats have to be well done and nothing less. Some have said it's a crime, but their opinions on the matter are wrong and they're the crazy ones.

On another note, I'm bored out of my mind. If I have to spend another weekend locked up I'm about to go insane.
You poor, misguided child. I'll show you the way if you only let me.

Congrats! Next month (or the one after that) will be my one year divorce anniversary.
Being that I was raised in Florida for the majority of my adolescence, I can tell you there's nothing better than freshly squeezed orange juice.

Oh, you bought Sunny D at the market? That's cute. Come talk to me when you've had the real deal.
I got tased today. If you can avoid the same happening to you in the future, please do.
I've eaten an entire pizza pie in one sitting. I'm 5'0 and 103 lbs.

But less impressive, it's a Domino's medium thin crust with light cheese.
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