This thread endures throughout the ages. Surviving even the apocalypse itself. Eventually it will be the only piece of evidence left that human beings ever existed. Aliens will discover this thread and nothing else. Our legacy as a species will be that of a bunch of buffoons.

I wish that the next post in this thread will be completely devoid of vowels.

Grntd, thgh ths css th txt t b nrl ndcphrbl, lvng cnfsn nd dstrss n ts wk.

Wsh tht th nxt pst n ths thrd wll b cmpltl dvd f cnsnnts.

ae, ou i i ee ae o ea. ie a e u ee ou ii?

I i a I ou ii Ioa.

Granted, but because the genie has no clue what you asked for, he instead awards me a hundred billion dollars.

I wish I could wish upon a star and have my wish come true.

Granted: you are transported to the nearest star to make said wish and promptly burned to a crisp.

I wish to have the wish of the next to reply.

Granted, your wish that you shall have, for nothing else is better. For a post, that's both lyrical and whimsical, but composed for a simple letter. For my wish, you see is quite a dish, quite as tasty as it is splendid. I wish for the next post to have rhythm, to rhyme, as I have purposefully intended.

But all is not well, our wishes came true. And it was as dull for me as it was for you. A wish we have wasted, both grand and magnificent. Has, but through a twist of irony, became bland yet maleficent. For every post forever more, you see. Shall lack whimsy forever more, for you and me.

You may wish, you may rhyme, but your wish itself's out of time. Your wants have nothing done, but give the genie a change in tone. One might say it was a waste, though that depends on your artistic taste.

As for a wish of my own, I do not desire wealth or renown. As much as this game is a test in creativity, I wish for the genie to show their verbose capability. Make your post long-winded and stretched, and you will have your name in my memory etched.

my post sure will be long winded and stretched mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nice and stretched

I wish to be a toilet

Granted... but you are now... a toilet. People sit on you and conduct all their business on your face. What is wrong with you?! LOL

I wish I was a popsickle.

Granted. However in a weird twist of fate now people are sitting on you and conducting their business on your face. Odd.

I wish to be recognised for my achievements in the arts by my peers and close friends.

ROFLMAO

Granted; but the mob gets wind of your achievements and sets fire to your house.

I wish for an epic cheeseburger!

It's unedible.

I wish for a marshmallow. Just a regular, white, edible marshmallow.

Granted. You are awarded with a pillow of gooey marsh and without much thought you resolve to eat it. You're pleasantly surprised. It tastes fine. In fact, it tastes great. The faint texture is the perfect consistency. The sweetness, the stickiness, you can't call to mind the last time something so simple gave you so much pleasure. You try to savour it for as long as you can; for two minutes, uninterrupted, gustatory bliss. The last morsel fizzles on your tongue, taken downstream by a tide of salivary liquid to rest with the rest in your gut. And then nothing. The taste leaves you. With it, a piece of your heart leaves too. You resolve that this can't be the end - you glimpsed divinity for but a moment. There had to be more to come.

So you spend much of your following years searching for new highs and thrills. You dabble in pastries and puddings, but nothing seems to satisfy you quite as well anymore. You accrue bad habit after bad habit, addiction after addiction, distance your friends, your family, until you finally lose the dream. You pick yourself up, straighten your tie and you try to make the most of the rest of your life. You give it your best shot. But you can't. You aren't young anymore - you let the prime of your life pass you by, constantly chasing your highest point, the day you experienced marshmallowey heaven. And the rest of your life pales in comparison. You die, alone, having achieved nothing of note, just another nameless victim of Time.

I wish for a pet rock!

Granted, that li'l asteroid out there somewhere is now your loyal pet. Don't call on it. It'll come.

I wish for a significant breakthrough to be made in a random field of science.

Granted. Nothing bad happens, but you go insane with the constant fear that something bad is going to happen.

I wish I where a tree.

You start to grow wood like growths on your skin. These wood like growths get so thick on your fingers that you can no longer use them. Congratulations, you've become another tree man.

I wish for a post that contradicts itself.

I can't even read. I just go by the pictures and hope for the best.

I wish for something dangerous and hazardous to my health to befall me because lol random.

granted, you now have a severe case of the common cold and are bedridden for a couple days while forced to only eat hot, flavorless broth by whoever is caring for you because "It'll help you get better faster!" The broth messes with you more than the actual cold did and now you have a perpetual case of the sniffles for a few months due to a lack of real food while you were sick.

I wish for the warm weather to stay. I'm sick of this bi-polar stuff in my area

Granted, every day the temperature rises with one degree. Eventually it's so warm every living thing dies.

I wish that health food and junk food switched nutritional values.

Granted. A nutritional crisis cripples human society and diseases & plagues devastate the planet's population.

I wish for the world to be covered in a thick layer of ketchup!