Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Kalleth
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Kalleth Let me tell you / a story friend...

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Your duck has eaten you. Congratulations.

I wish for the god of gods, ODIN, to take me into Valhalla as one of his sacred EINHERJI. I wish to FIGHT when RAGNAROK comes to claim the NINE WORLDS OF YGGDRASIL!
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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Ryuzaki Mad Prophet, and Herald of the Old Gods

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Granted but the genie thinks Norse mythology is the same as Skyrim, so you are now an argonian slave in Windhelm

I wish I had a Lusty Argonian Maid
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by TheUnknowable
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TheUnknowable Like Pineapple on Pizza

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@RyuzakiGranted, but your spear chafes badly because she polished it too much.

I wish for 10000 gold pieces.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Bishop
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@TheUnknowable Granted but the pieces are actually golden dust particles which you won't even see to witness the wind blowing them away.
I wish to have 1000 more wishes.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Enarr
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Enarr

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Granted, but you squander each and every one of them.

I wish that Miles Morales hadn't taken Peter Parker's place as the Ultimate Spider-Man.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by RinOkumara
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yeah, that is a really good wish so I'm not gonna' crush that wish

neigh
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by IntPenDespSword
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IntPenDespSword

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Your horse kicks you in the gut, and you die from internal bleeding.

I wish for the average IQ of the next generation to be over 150, without decreasing or increasing population size by more than 20 %.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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Ryuzaki Mad Prophet, and Herald of the Old Gods

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Granted, but their IQ leads them to drive every other species to extinction for science.

I wish that I was both the strongest and smartest man alive, without increasing or decreasing the size of my body at all.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Kalleth
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Kalleth Let me tell you / a story friend...

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Granted but you die pretty much the first time you try to use your newfound strength, because the physics of what you are trying to accomplish breaks your body. And if your newfound intelligence keeps you from overexerting, then you die because that intelligence makes you over-confident and an embarrassing accident ends your life, Final-Destination-Style.

I wish for scientists to discover how to do cold fusion, solving the energy crisis.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by stardust
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stardust Lord Derp of Canadia

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Granted; scientists perfect a means of extracting energy from the zero-point field using null-energy. However, as an accidental side effect, a black hole eats the solar system. Omnomnom.

I wish for an axe to grind.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by IntPenDespSword
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IntPenDespSword

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Granted. Out of nowhere, an axe appears lodged in your head.

I wish for cool sunglasses at a useful weight and durability to appear in front of me, though not so that they cause tissue displacement.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by TheUnknowable
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Granted, though "cool" is a relative term, so the genie made them out of a Bose-Einstein Condensate at about 0.1k.

I wish for a nice turkey sandwich.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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Granted, you receive a sandwitch with the country of Turkey in it

I wish to be the dictator of a well known country and remain as such until I die of old age.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by RinOkumara
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ok you are hitler but... he's dead so... yeah

cluck
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by IntPenDespSword
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IntPenDespSword

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Your chicked pecks you in the eye, and barely lays eggs at all. It is also infertile and disobedient.

I wish for people in this thread to make actual wishes, instead of animal noises.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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Granted but animal noises becomes the official primary language in the USA

I wish actual wishes were easier to come up with.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by TheUnknowable
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ok you are hitler but... he's dead so... yeah

cluck


but didn't he die of poison or a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head, not old age?
(thinking of the twilight zone episode)
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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<Snipped quote by RinOkumara>

but didn't he die of poison or a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head, not old age?
(thinking of the twilight zone episode)


Granted, the poster corrects their error.

I wish people wouldnt say something and not contribute to the thread afterward.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by TheUnknowable
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TheUnknowable Like Pineapple on Pizza

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@Ryuzakigranted, the thread dies.

I wish it didn't.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Ryuzaki
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Ryuzaki Mad Prophet, and Herald of the Old Gods

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Granted, but... Your next RP dies instead.

I wish for the edgiest post ever.
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