Expllo

Bleach: A New Dawn

AbigailTenshi said
Fair enough :3 I has my Kaizo, he's Kurisa's and is cute too ^3^

I have no one DX

*Cuddles monkey*

Bleach: A New Dawn

Zane620 said
As they killed the three Hollows Yu watched as a gillian appeared and fired off a cero which then split into multiple ceros which Yu somehow dodged with his killer pain in his head, then the Gillian was killed not by Yu or Ayashi, but a man with red hair in a white outfit, he also had a hole in his neck, which rose a surprise look in Yu's face. "What?" Them man then vanished and before he could find him his shin connected with Yu's gut which sent him flying straight through a building at an alarming rate. Yu laid in some rubble coughing a bit, when suddenly the pain in his head rose to an extreme and before he knew it, half of a Hollow mask formed on the left side of his face. Yu's face then grinned as he started laughing his voice now more hollow like as he shunpoed back in the air and cracked his neck. "Ohhhhh, fucking finally. That necklace was a pain in the ass man. About time I can fucking stretch my god damn arms." The Hollow Yu said stretching his arm as he looked at the red haired man, who had fired a Cero at Ayashi. "Oh so thats the hottie that Yu had some fun with." Hollow Yu turned his head back toward the man and shunpoed to the left of him. "My turn hotshot." Yu said as he swung his right leg upwards at the man.

A Gillian? Ayashi thought as it fired a cero that separated into multiple cero in which Ayashi managed to dodge majority of them, she took the ones that hit her well. It was then killed, scanning the man that killed it she saw the Hollow hole. Before she could further think a cero had hit her sending her flying away. Landing, she did it quietly and crouched. This is bad, she thought before she watched as Yu recovered with a Hollow mask covering his face. Frantically she scanned him, his chest! His necklace was gone, since when!? Ok, this is really bad! She thought as she backed up a bit into the alley she landed in. She scanned the man that attacked them again, he was....Strong, obviously, and faster then they could react. That meant her and Yu had to be smart to beat him, and they both were smart. But Yu had been taken control of by his Hollow, that meant he atleast had the strength to hold his own while she looked for the necklace. So she did, and left the fighting up to those two until she was needed or found the necklace.

Bleach: A New Dawn

DeathstrokeSW said
Name: Kenny (no other name known.)Appearance: a Soul Reaper uniform with most of the chest exposed, short-cropped hair and a black hood with a mask covering everything from nose to collarbone.Age: (Keep it sensible! Think of it like this. 10 Shinigami years equal 1 of our years so a 19 year old would be 190. Just what we go by) 240Height: 6’3Weight: 265Hair Colour: BlackEye Colour: GreenRace: CaucasianRank: Unseated, but I hope to rise to captain. Spiritual Energy Colour: BlackPersonality: (Would like to be done but can be done later)History: (Would like to be done but can be done later)Other: ~Zanpakuto~Zanpakuto name: SankontessuoType: CombatZanpakuto Shikai Release command: ReapSpirit Appearance: like the grim reaperInner world: (optional)Sealed appearance: Ninjato with a black wrapped hiltShikai appearance: a scythe with a red bladeBankai appearance: sickle with a black bladeShikai skills:(Start off with no Shikai or 4 to 5 Shikai skills)1. Fear inducement(minor, but all it does is the equivalent of an increased heartrate)2.a slash similar to a getsuga tensho in function.3. Increased speed4. Darkness generation similar to what Tosen was able to do but without the sensory deprivation, rather, it simply forces the battlefield to shrink to a more intimate level5.6.7.8.Bankai skills:1. Fear inducement similar to Shikai2. Darkness generation becomes sensory deprivation excluding hearing3. Increased speed4.increased strength5. A getsuga tensho like slash6. (Ultimate Skill) steal life from the opponent like reaping a soul but at the cost of the user's life.Non-lethal Zanpakuto Skills: instigates fear.SkillsZanjutsu: ShitonegashiKido:Tsuzuri RaidenHakuda:TesshōHoho:ShunpoPoints gained from missions:Mission log:Points spent and skills gained:

Well overall, I think you should write allot more.....But here's some things to help:

1. Race = Shinigami.

2. Add descriptions for your abilities, as well add post durations and cool downs.

Now onto the actual abilities:

Fear inducement - You said minor, so that states how much fear is given....But does the fear actually do anything besides give fear? Are there any after effects or...???

a slash similar to a getsuga tensho in function - That makes sense, I just think you could write it better (As you could write the whole CS better) and add a post duration and cool down.

Increased speed - How much?

Darkness generation similar to what Tosen was able to do but without the sensory deprivation, rather, it simply forces the battlefield to shrink to a more intimate level - I think forcing an area to become smaller would be too much, rather just make it an illusion type ability or something?

Same for the Bankai abilities pretty much. How much faster and stronger? Etc.

Also the last Bankai ability is probably too much, no matter that it's an ultimate skill.

Overall you just need to add more to it and/or write it better than what's up there. Adding a personality would help too, just saying.

Bleach: A New Dawn

Phobos said
I offered you the princess but you said give her back!

You mentioned loli's at first, that's why I said no when you offered! <.<

YuukiSuzuki said
@Expllo: Akoiji is welcome to meet Kyoko and have something happen >> I don't mind. I love making chaos for my charas.

I just wanted the bird man T^T

Bleach: A New Dawn

YuukiSuzuki said
@Expllo: *points to him* and that is what happens when someone pisses Kyo off.... they get their heart cut in two.@Rusty:Yuuki: Ohhhh okay,Kyoko: Well for one I'm not. Secondly don't you think that sounds a little creepy to someone you don't know? *slight suspicious look*

I have no heart o.o

.....Aokiji and Kaizo BrOTP then o.o mmmmm'sorry o.o

Bleach: A New Dawn

YuukiSuzuki said
Kyoko: *impales Expllo from a distance* ...... *disappears before he can do anything back*

I'm sorry, you can have the bird! o_o Geez, can't have anyone T^T TORIYAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! ;_;

Bleach: A New Dawn

YuukiSuzuki said
Not originally no O_O Screw it he's staying and yes stuff is gonna happen. *bow chika wow wow* xD. Akoiji and Kyoko can still meet though Expllo!

I called the bird already! Toriyama is mine!

Bleach: A New Dawn

Kurisa said
Sooooooooooo I can get rid of Kazuya? O.o

Toriyama thooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuugh! T^T

Bleach: A New Dawn

YuukiSuzuki said
*Nod* It might make Kyoko forced to be open up more as well, which she needs to do. So it might work.

hi5 4 development and relationships! xD

Bleach: A New Dawn

YuukiSuzuki said
@Expllo: Aokiji & Hikari seem decent XD

Aokiji is harder to get to open.....Would make for decent development x)

Phobos said
I can't remember all of it >_< it's on the wikiXD don't let Abi know, she may think some yahoo stuff is going on >_>

Yahoo? Lmao! xD