Avatar of Inertia

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Recent Statuses

4 yrs ago
Current Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions.
7 likes
4 yrs ago
She knocked that smug look off my face but luckily I was wearing a second, smaller smug look underneath.
9 likes
5 yrs ago
There's nothing more intoxicating than the clear absence of a penis.
4 likes
7 yrs ago
Half of Blink 182 is Wink 91.
8 likes
8 yrs ago
A Freudian Slip is when you mean one thing but fuck your mother.
3 likes

Bio







"I like it when the center is wet."


"You're the biggest bitch I know, but you're funny sometimes, so it's okay."
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"Do what you like, as long as it involves killing the green bastards."

"Free reign to do what I want?" Acrius said, "Works for me."

Acrius eyes were directed to Rudolph's commands of focusing the goblin sappers. Were goblins always this smart? Using catapults and now bombs to breach their defenses? He eyed the goblin with bags through the battlements. For once he'd use his head more tactically. Though his impulsive nature would say otherwise; he actually does have a good head for tactics and strategy in his head. An idea popped into his head.

Shuffling through the walls he found a pot of oil. Acrius would then rip apart his already torn cloak to make pseudo-wrappings. Next he would blanket his arrows with the wrappings, letting the pointed end poke through; finally he dipped it into the pot of oil. The boy would make a few more of the same arrows.

Acrius produced a small flame on his finger, lighting the oil-doused arrow on fire. Acrius now jumped from cover and drew his bow. With a deep breath, he aimed for the bags that the goblin bombers had. The oranged-eyed boy would make a bet that the bags were flammable. His arrow released, flying sharply through the air. The wind, fortunately, did not swallow the flame. It found it's mark and pierced through the bag.

Acrius did not check to see if it would work. He quickly lit another arrow on fire and scanned the battlefield for another goblin sapper. He found one, aimed and the arrow found its mark. Hopefully the fire would spread onto the bag and light the bombs, killing the sapper and nearby goblins.

His next few shots would miss; sometimes it would be blocked by a shield and other times the wind would be too strong and engulf the flame. After running out of his special arrows he would return to using normal arrows as he continuously let a volley of arrows loose.

Acrius looked back as someone tapped his shoulder only to find air. A voice rang out from his right ear.

"You speak of maidens and not letting Merik about, but t'was it not you who was frolicking with a maiden?"

The orange-eyed boy nearly had a heart attack then and there. While he had the uncanny ability to feel eyes on him, he thought it was just one of the meandering soldiers. He finally craned his neck towards the drow.

"Gods..." Acrius said, trying to keep a calm and cool face to mask his heart rate going up, "Please don't do that, Zatana."

"Let's just say... the 'humans' round the Empire don't quite take kindly to uhhm..." He paused as if to look for the words before scratching his head roughly, "Humans in the Empire don't have real 'respect' for beastmen. I ain't a scholar, I don't know, it's just what I've heard from gramps- er, Balthazar, s'all. It's stupid but that's how it is."

"You speak of maidens and not letting Merik about, but t'was it not you who was frolicking with a maiden?"

"Ugh," Acrius replied simply, feeling a headache bubbling, "Its the city girls, they're all mad, I don't know. Let's not talk about it, I feel like you'll conjure her by doing so."

“Merik will stay.”

"Merik it's Leonidas' order-" The bell interrupted Acrius. It seemed that the west wall was under siege. Seems like the goblins and orcs offer no respite as the walls were bombarded. He watched Merik simply saunter over to the wall and begin chucking wooden pillars like they were one of the paper gliders kids make. With a devilish grin he muttered, "Well, well, well. Whatta show off."

“Don't worry, Zatana,” Acrius also made his way to the wall, ignoring the soldier who tried to stop him, “I won't jump over the wall... probably.” Acrius said the last part quietly and away from earshot (Though her being a drow she heard it quite easily). He 'borrowed' a bow and quiver from the stack of weaponry. The oranged-eyed boy took aim and let slew a volley of arrows. Each one found a mark; he aimed for the goblins whose shields and formations were in disarray thanks to Merik. Acrius didn't exactly enjoy using the bow as he preferred the visceral feeling of close combat- the clashing of steel, strength and skill. What's the fun in taking out an enemy from a safe, far distance? But archery was a close second, short of jumping the wall and gunning straight for those accursed catapults.

"Hey Rudolph!" Acrius shouted over the fighting as he ducked behind the battlements to take cover from the goblins' own arrows, "Do you think fire arrows would work? Gotta try something, those cannons are taking their damned sweet time. I have half a mind to jump down there and burn them myself!"

Acrius really wasn't going to jump over the wall. Even he knew that was suicide.
... Right?
Acrius could only now fully take the city is in such a state of disrepair. It was good that the empire is finally intervening, even he didn't think it would last much longer than it did. Hopefully it would be as simple as that. He folded his hands behind his head as he followed Leonidas' mount trod down towards the keep. Two familiar faces greet the prince as he passed. It was the two he had 'exercised' with. The orange-eyed boy shot them a smirk as he passed them.

Acrius simply listened to Leonidas' impassionate speech, it was full of optimistic idealism. In stark contrast Balthazar was more of a pragmatic realist. A balance of both will surely lead to a proper solution on a rather complicated subject. As for Acrius', he values strength and skill over anything else. He also valued strength of character over the race they were born as. Human, Drow, Dwarf, Beastmen. It's all the same to him. Hell, he even gets a kick out of fighting the other races due to their innate strengths compared to humans. As an orphan he saw the worst in humanity. As part of Prince Leonidas' retinue, he saw the best in humanity.

Though he wouldn't voice any of these thoughts aloud. It wasn't quite his place and his view on the issue was rather simplistic. Instead he would quell those who showed dissatisfaction on their face with a silent glare.

"Will one of you go find Merik, I don't know how the local troops will take a Lizardman just walking around."

"I'll do it." Acrius said, knowing he should probably gain a few brownie points for all the stuff he's pulled (and will pull) during this campaign.

Soon Leonidas and Balthazar would disappear into the keep. It was normal procedure, as usually only Leonidas and Balthazar would be privy to the meetings.

"Any of you up for an excursion to the west gate?" The boy grinned, "You never know what kind of trouble I can get myself into." Acrius didn't like staying idle, after all. He turned towards the general direction of the west gate as he said this. He didn't mind going alone or with a few other people.

Folding his hands behind his head again he trod away from the keep. Most of the soldiers or the little general populace around didn't take much notice of him. They seemed have a lot on their mind, which, considering the circumstances, is reasonable. The only thing that separated Acrius from the normal soldier was the Royal Guard symbol that dangled on his neck. On seeing this some soldiers would hastily give greetings while others looked on incredulously. Acrius simply waved off those who greeted him. He asked them to keep it casual as it was too formal and, consequentially, too stuffy for the boy.

It wouldn't be long when he would spot Merik. The lizard man stood out like sore thumb due to this height. Acrius would notice the soldiers and men gossiping like milk-maids, standing around and whispering about Merik.

Acrius drew a breath and loudly shouted, "Don't you clucking hens have better else to do!?" He eyed a few of them and purposefully let his royal guard emblem dangle from his neck. "Quit the gawking you maidens."

"Merik, hello." Acrius looked up at the 8-foot behemoth and crossed his arms, "Prince Leonidas says we have to be at the keep, can't have you wandering around because, well, you know."
Magic. How it made life utterly convenient. Acrius made a mental note to bug Balhazar on teaching him that 'clean' spell. He smelled immaculate, nary a whiff of the odour the plagued him. "Appreciate it, gramps." He said with real gratitude and an actual smile. Atleast he was now presentable. He himself didn't mind the smell, he was used to it after all. And if a smell would make you gag, then you'd have no place in the battlefield. In the past, Siegfried had grilled him alive when he trot behind the prince; the smell that Acrius exuded visually repulsed those the around him.

As Acrius mused those thoughts, he felt a horse staring at him. Now a horse was staring at him. It was Zatana's mare. It seemed that he couldn't escape being gawked at. Then Zatana herself appeared and handed off a package to Balthazar. From the little he could gather the mission itself was successful. That was all he thought about, not even considering that Zatana was oddly late for a woman of her skill. She was mysterious, to say the least. All he could vouch for was her skill in battle. He hoped that'd she'd grant him a duel sometime soon.

The horse now nuzzled into him and began nipping at his armour. What a lively beast. Acrius was about to lightly push the horse away as it neared his hair when Zatana jerked it away. "Thanks, I just got clean," He said simply, "Quite an animated mare you have there, Zatana."
Before Acrius could mount his horse up he spotted two more goblin riders charging towards his location. "Oho?" He said, not realizing how disadvantageous it was fighting two mounted riders. His ridiculous plan somehow managed to work but he didn't really think past the consequences. Still, a two versus one? A challenge like that would've been invigorating. However it wouldn't come to pass as Leonidas and Balthazar covered him. Balthazar used magic to kill the other rider efficiently. Leonidas, with a mighty swing, took out the goblin preparing to throw a spear at him. The rider-less wolf, however, now leaped towards Acrius.

The oranged-eyed boy had barely managed to unsheathe his short-sword. He was pinned to the floor as he blocked the leaping bite with the broad side of his sword. The only thing between him and the wolf was steel. The wolf snarled and snapped at Acrius as he attempted to bite into him. "Eugh, yuck." He muttered as drool slobbered onto him. Slowly he turned the blade horizontally, the blade now digging into the wolf. In it's ferocity the weapon began digging into its maw. In a few minutes it would weaken. Soon it flopped lifeless on top of him.

A mixture of wolf and goblin blood, sweat, and now slobber. Acrius must've smelled like a dream. With a huff he hoisted the corpse off of him. He knew for sure that he was going to get it from Leonidas later. Even Balthazar had that tell-tale look about him. The goblins soon retreated and Leonidas called off those who pursued them. A small family now emerged from the carriage. It seemed that the two in the front weren't as lucky. A pang of guilt ate at him. Luckily they'll not be orphans. He thought, glancing at the boy as he remembered his youth.

The 18-year old girl sprinted at him at blinding speeds. It was a speed that outpaced anything he'd seen before. Suddenly he was in a neck lock... no, it wasn't a neck lock. A hug?

"My hero! You were so amazing the way you leapt in to save me!"

Oh god. He really just wanted to stretch his bones. Who was this girl? He held his hands upwards, not touching her at all.

"Err, it was nothing...?" Acrius responded awkwardly. "Best not to touch me, I'm covered in dirt, blood, and gods-knows-what."

Despite his warnings the girl clung on like a tight vice. Girls from the city were indeed something else. Acrius always had a sixth sense for feeling eyes on him and whenever he went to the capital women would openly gawk at him. He had no idea why and he believed it was due to his unkempt appearance.

"Acrius since you don't seem to like your horse you are going to saddle yours up to the cart and ride with these fine people back to Bergkoff. You two stay with them as escort."

Some of the soldiers in the retinue stifled their laughters as this was said. Though he tried to glare at them, he wasn't very convincing with this girl clinging onto him. "What!? Why do I ha-" Acrius stopped himself as he saw that look in Leonidas' eyes. "... As you command, crowned prince."

The girl's air depriving hug was let go as she (barely) did a crusty to thank the crowned prince. Even he wouldn't act that brazen against the prince. But knowing Leonidas, he was likely to let the discourtesy go. He felt his blood stop pumping on the arm that the girl latched onto. This girl has a grip stronger than an orc.

"So your name is Acrius then? I'm Liz nice to meet you."

"... Yes. Acrius Stroude." Acrius replied, not at all knowing what the hell was happening. "Nice to meet you... Liz?"

Acrius tried his best to help the two knights posted with him but was little help with Elizabeth clutching onto him. Luckily, she eased up in the cart (but was still too close) and instead barraged him with questions. Battles, Adventures, even his weaponry. Anything centered around him. Why him? He had no idea, who would be interested in someone like Acrius. Still, the orange-eyed swordsman tried his best to answer her questions. Even with his lack of flair, the girl seemed entranced. The 5-year old boy even crawling up and listening to his rather plain retelling of his exploits.

As they arrived in the city, Acrius internally sighed. He did have a soft-spot for younger children, seeing himself in them. Still, this was something he could say he had ever done before. The barrage of questions seemed to never end. The mother of the two likely let it happen to let the kids keep their minds off their dead relatives. He gave the three a nod before he stepped off. However he felt a weight on his arm again. Elizabeth was once again slung around his arm. A few soldiers he knew from the retinue wolf-whistled at the two. Acrius made a mental note to remember their faces for 'extra training' with him later.

"Uhh... You should probably go with your mother and brother to hide... right?" Acrius said unconvincingly. Unsurprisingly she wasn't compliant.

Before she could reply a familiar voice called out;

"I'm going to need my comrade back,"

Elizabeth looked mad and pouty but didn't say anything back. She reluctantly let go of his arm and walked towards her waiting relatives, looking at Acrius the whole time. She waved at him one last time and he awkwardly wave back. With a giggle she turned around and finally reunited with her family.

"Thank gods." Acrius said towards Faira. "That really tired me out, why are girls from the city like that? I owe you one Faira."

"How'd it go on your end? Any issues?" He changed the subject and inquired as he walked towards the prince and his retinue.

"Prince Leonidas!" Acrius called out. "The family has been safely delivered."

Acrius leaned closely towards Balthazar; his expression was dead serious, a burning question in his mind. He was certain that the Balthazar could smell the cocktail of odours on him. "Any way I could wash some of this smell off my armour?"
Acrius couldn't stop the grin from spreading on his face. The familiar odour of battle hit his nose. "Just like home." He muttered, gripping the reigns and dashing ahead of the prince as he ordered the charge. He met one of the wolf riders in a head on clash. The force Acrius exerted stunned the goblin and pushed him off his mount. Acrius stopped his horse and turned for another charge. The defenseless rider didn't see what hit him as Acrius' longsword sliced through his neck; the decapitated head spiraled in the air, dousing Acrius and nearby combatants in the goblin's filthy blood.

The distraught mount growled at Acrius. The boy felt pity for the poor thing having to serve a master like that. This was war, however. He dismounted, charging at the wolf. It bared its fangs and lunged at him. Acrius deftly dodged the wolf whilst counter-attacking. The mount had basically charged itself into his blade. It soon fell limp on the floor, dead.

Acrius closed his eyes and took it all in. That week of marching felt like a month for the boy, so this was a small, yet needed reprieve. He spotted Balthazar casting spells, causing a chill to run through his spine. Balthazar's spell always managed to creep him out. It was one reason why he didn't push his buttons too far. That, and he is a menace with that cane. Soon, his omnipresent grin somehow grew wider as he spotted what seemed to be the leader of the goblins. He mounted his horse again. Enough of the small fries, the leader's head is mine.

Acrius raised a brow as he observed Balthazar cast a spell on him. The goblin's supposed leader now moved slowly, as if under a haze. He frowned slightly; it wasn't going to be much of a fair fight. As such he charged over to the goblin leader's locations and promptly dismounted. With a taunting grin Acrius pointed at the Goblin leader, turned his palm upwards and motioned at the leader to come at him. He wanted to meet the leader's mounted charge as he felt that the hex attenuated the challenge.

"This much should be enough for you, right, O' Goblin Leader?" Acrius said aloud, the distance between both combatants quite large. The Goblin Leader let out an enraged roar and came barreling towards him. Of course, Acrius had something resembling a plan. He'd be dead long ago if he didn't have a good sense of tactics in his foolhardy head. Though, what he was about to do was more insane than tactical.

Acrius believed that, from the Goblin leader's weapon and mount, the only comfortable strike it could do would be a horizontal strike. He planted his longsword into the dirt as the Goblin leader approached. He would do something many would call 'idiotic' or 'irresponsible'. It wasn't something Siegfried would approve of, that's for sure. His feet thud across the muddy dirt floor as he sprinted directly towards the charge of the Goblin leader. His weapon was raised horizontally; just like the boy predicted.

Acrius, using the forward momentum of his sprint, jumped upwards. The goblins' blade nicked his sabaton as he dodged the intended killing stroke. With his open, free hand he grabbed the goblin's face during the jump, forcibly dismounting him off the wolf. The orange-eyed boy slammed the goblin hard into the muddied ground as he landed. With the Goblin leader momentarily stunned, he turned his attention to the wolf who had now turned around. It growled menacingly as it charged at the boy in a desperate bid to save its rider. The short sword slid out of it's sheathe as Acrius turned around and sliced through the wolf.

The wolf whimpered helplessly as it flop to the ground; blood soaked into its matted fur. Acrius sprung up quickly and faced the Goblin leader, who seemed to have snapped out of his daze. His eyes traveled to the dying wolf and then to the swordsman. Rage in the form of shrieks filled the air. After another brief moment, the two swords clashed. The familiar clanging of steel resounded through the battlefield.

The orange-eyed lad was holding back; the hex that Balthazar cast on the Goblin leader still took effect. Its movements were also erratic, clearly enraged at his mount dying. Each and every slowed or enraged movement was deftly blocked or deflected. It was apparent that the fight had become rather anticlimactic. With a disappointed sigh, he deflected the goblin's sword away and thrust into his neck in one stroke. The noises that came out of the Goblin leader's mouth were garbled and nonsensical. However, its eyes bore into Acrius, as if to curse him. The eyes soon became clouded as the Goblin leader breathed his last.

Acrius wiped the blood off his short-sword. He soon retrieved his two-handed longsword and looked around the battlefield; the fight still roared around him. He trod up to his mount again. If he was lucky he may be able to kill one more goblin. He hoped, at least.
More eyes had been observing the fight than he thought. Manald, a gigantic beastman observed the fight bemused. Acrius gave him a curt nod. "Warming up your joints before a large battle is important." He shot the beastman a half-smirk as he said this. Another figure joined the retinue, Zatana. He had essentially no information on this woman. She was heavily dressed up and seemed to avoid socializing. Still, he couldn't deny her skill during the plot to assassinate the prince.

Acrius froze at the sound of the prince addressing him. As expected, Leonidas was going to grill him later. A slight frown etched onto his face, Leonidas' reprimands sometimes took hours. He quietly followed the prince and pumped his fist in the air at being put on cavalry. A cocksure grin now made its way to his face; cavalry tend to be in the thickest and heaviest fights of the day. "Of course, I follow your orders my liege." He said, trying (but failing) not to let his excitement leak into his voice.

Before they could do so, Balthazar made his presence known. He was a familiar yet still utterly mysterious figure to Acrius. You could say he's his pseudo-teacher in magic related endeavors. Still, he was a riddle wrapped up in an enigma. Hell, Acrius had never seen the old man so much as crack a smile or frown. Well, there was one time... "Ah, Gramps!" The amber-eyed boy called out. That one time when Acrius called him 'gramps' was the only time he'd seen his mask crack. He had half a mind to present his magical progress to Balthazar. However he seemed to be having an important conversation with Faira and Zatana, so he left it at the that.

Luckily Acrius already had the necessary equipment on hand and simply followed the prince to the stables. Luckily, horseback riding was easy to grasp for him. However he couldn't teach anyone to save his life, he was a horrid teacher. As he saddled onto a horse he spotted a dirtied-up beastman entering the stables. Manald voiced a valid concern of him on horses. Acrius had to stifle a chuckle as he tried imagining Manald on a horse.
Might be interested in this!
Acrius frowned and let out a long-drawn sigh. The past week had just been marching. Marching. It didn't exhaust the amber-eyed lad but it did bore him to no ends. He knew why. Still, his body shook from the inactivity; he hadn't had a good fight in awhile. No one was willing to spar, citing that they were exhausted from the endless marching and setting up the camp. This morning was no different. The cold seemed to pierce through the thin tents, rendering many of them exhausted and dragging their feet. Acrius couldn't help but think it a tiny bit pathetic; a little bit of cold and some marching did this much to the men who was supposed to hold Bergkoff?

Acrius sat on a box, he had already finished his own preparations. His left foot bounced up-and-down incessantly, trying to release excess energy. Whether it was from boredom or anxiety, he didn't know. What he did know was that he was going a bit stir-crazy. Pushing those thoughts out of his mind, he observed the two by the prince's side; both seemed affable enough. At the very least they were made of sturdier stuff than the rest of the men. It was Faira and Rudolph, he believed. Neither of the two whinged nor complained during the march.

"When is this damned march going to be over?"

"The faster it's over the better, I say."

"Hah, right! Yeh I just want my gold."

"Dying for the Grand-Empire? Fealty to the crowned prince? Sod that."


The two men guffawed between themselves. The boy's amber eyes trained onto them. His gaze pierced through them like a hawk watching its prey. Is this the stench of insubordination I smell? Acrius thought fiendishly, knowing full well that it was barely that, After just a week of marching?

One of them had a chill run down their spine. He directed his friend to Acrius' piercing glare. A look of anger and confusion boiled within the two men. He didn't say anything, his eyes instead invited them to try something. They seemed willing to fight; finally, he might get some real exercise. One more push ought do it. "So we're discussing open treason in the encampment now, eh?" He got up and cracked his neck, "Sounds like you two need sorting out."

"Who the fek do you think you are?"

"Someone needs to teach you some respect, boy!"


"I don't think there's anyone here quite worth respecting, though?" Acrius spat back with a grin. He goaded the duo, intentionally making their slight bigger than it actually was.

The two men approached Acrius carelessly. One threw a strong hay-maker which he ducked and swept. The man landed face first into the dirt, seemingly reeling from the impact. The other soldier grabbed Acrius' wrist and screamed obscenities. Acrius simply reversed the hold and, using his other arm as leverage, flipped the man easily. He now had the man in a shoulder lock. With one more motion he could dislocate the man's shoulder. He then shuddered as he felt the fierce, lion-like gaze of Leonidas. He immediately released him; placing both his hands up in mock-surrender. Had it been a moment later he might've gone through and actually snapped his arm.

"That was good exercise lads, you've improved!" Acrius said loud enough for the prince and the rest to hear. He whispered the following words to the duo, "Any more talk like that and its more than an arm I snap."

The duo retreated somewhere further into the encampment; glaring at Acrius all the while. If looks could kill...

"Good morrow to you Prince Leonidas." Acrius smiled as he approached the group; his mood was noticeably better because of the 'exercise', "You too, Rudolph and Faira."
I've discussed this in pm with @Arthanus, so don't mind the random CS lobbing!


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