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1 yr ago
Current There's nothing more intoxicating than the clear absence of a penis.
4 likes
3 yrs ago
Half of Blink 182 is Wink 91.
8 likes
4 yrs ago
A Freudian Slip is when you mean one thing but fuck your mother.
3 likes
4 yrs ago
A baby chicken is a chick. An adult chicken is a hen. Chick-hen. Clever bastards.
11 likes
4 yrs ago
When I was heating up something in the microwave it sounded like World War 2, but even then it still came out cold.
7 likes

Bio







Well, since you're here, might as well take a seat.

... not that there are any.


















Psst... I'm not saying that you don't know, but the pics are clickable








"I like it when the center is wet."


"You're the biggest bitch I know, but you're funny sometimes, so it's okay."
Friend of mine









Most Recent Posts

Location: The Hawk's Nest


Connor breathed an internal sigh of relief as the situation has seemingly settled. The tension, however, seemed to have decided to nestle uncomfortably into the background. Cassian's piercing stare towards their table didn't help. The game was a go, as Mac's ball plopped into one of the cups. Soon Alaric would follow up with a shot that narrowly missed. Connor fished the ball out of the cup; the harsh smell licked his nose. A stroke of genius (or stupidity, depending on how you look at it) crossed the bespectacled boy's head.

Keeping his eyes shut he gulped the disgusting drink down as quick as he could, not wanting the taste to linger. The drink burnt his throat yet it somehow gave him a chill. The blond shook his head; the drinks got worse as time went on. "Good god." He failed at holding back a gagging cough. "Before we continue, let's- ...fucking hell. Let's make it interesting." He paused in between words, a bad attempt to hide his true intentions. "How about... both people in the winners team gets a favour from both losers?"

"I mean a favour from me wouldn't be worth much." Connor turned towards Theodore and winked. "But a favour from a Bonfamille? That's another story." The blond grabbed a ball; crap, the drink had affected him way more than he thought it had. Still he released the ball with another high arc and continued. "So-" The ball landed in the cup as he enunciated the next words. "... how about it?"

Connor was nothing if not a showman.
...atleast while he's tipsy.
Location: The Hawk's Nest


"Might be a bit too late about that whole bartender thing, Theo." Connor slyly grinned beneath his cup.

The game ended before it began as a familiar voice called out to Theodore and Connor. Who would've guessed it to be Mac? Connor's roommate- Alaric bound right behind her. Mac challenged the duo to a beer pong game. It seemed like they were gonna play twos. The blond couldn't hold back a smile as he observed Theo's 'playing it cool' strategy.

"Alaric. Mac. How's it hangin'?" Connor greeted the two. "No hard feelings when we destroy you two."

Mac's clumsy self managed to slam herself onto a tall, dark and familiar figure. Cassian, an acquaintance Connor knew from working a few classes and projects together. Connor acknowledged his presence with a nod as they met each others gaze. Though trying his best to hide it; Theo's anger began radiating around him, hitting Connor in waves. Oh boy. The tension was palpable, you could almost cut it with a knife. He knew all three at a personal level but if push came to shove he'd have to back Theodore up, even if he'd rather the situation not escalate to anything more than petty jabs and passive aggression.

Mac CAN tell, right? He thought, watching the situation unfold. For now he would sit back, if it went to far he'd try his hardest to de-escalate it. However one look at the three men who look to be pining for the same girl shows that might not be possible. Hell this whole event had already formed a small peanut gallery, gawking and giggling amongst themselves as they watched.
Location: The Hawk's Nest

"Smart, save it for later." Connor replied, rubbing his shoulder in mock pain. "Gives me more time to google how to be a half-decent wingman."

"Magnifique!" He enunciated, mustering up what little French he knew. "A Bonfamille to add to my lists of victories tonight."

Connor felt a bit tipsy, but it was all the more reason to come out on top, triumphant. "Ruthlessly destroying a Bonfamille? Should probably put that in my C.V. under special skills." A mirthful chuckle escaped his throat. He adjusted his glasses back onto his face before fixing the table. It took him a few minutes to set the table, mixing some of the beer that was on it with the whiskey that Theodore brought. His nose wrinkled; atop those tables sat the foulest drinks he's smelt in a long time. A fitting punishment for the stakes.

The blond smirked and stood across the redhead. "Ball's in your court, T." He said simply. "I am, after all, a gracious host."
Location: The Hawk's Nest

Connor frowned at his third win in a row. His peers just couldn't get a game over him. In an attempt to even the playing field he downed four cups before eyeing his opponent, who looked absolutely plastered. "Comeon, er- Sam, was it?" He called out, trying his best to motivate him. "We're even now, one to one. Get me to the last drink." The student could barely stand, let alone hold a ping-pong ball steady. A sigh escaped Connor's lips, This is over, as the ball sailed squarely behind him, bouncing on the wooden floorboards.

The small crowd that watched groaned with some even facepalming. Connor took a few steps back, a ping-pong ball in hand, and arced the ball as high as he could. It sailed in the air for a few seconds before it landed right into the cup, spilling some of it's contents onto the already beer-stained table. The poor student gulped down the final cup before stumbling away into the crowd, probably to pass out somewhere.

Suddenly a redhead slammed a cheap-looking vodka onto the table. "Theo, Theo, Theo!" He chanted with a grin as he mixed some of the vodka with beer from the game. "How's my favorite redhead?"

Theodore Bonfamille. The most agreeable of the Bonfamille siblings, he seemed more relaxed and down-to-earth compared to the other two. So much so that they even became extremely close friends. Always confident and sure of himself, seeing him like this was rare. Only a few things made him like this- and as soon as he said 'her', Connor knew exactly who was living rent-free in his friend's mind.

"Mac, huh?" Connor said, taking a gulp of his newly mixed concoction. It was awful, but he kept chugging. "It's hard seeing you like this, man, not gonna lie."

Honestly the web of relationships this specific group had was tangled beyond belief. It was messy as messy could be and anyone looking in would probably whistle with disbelief. Connor eyed the now dispersing crowd that watched him and none seemed eager to challenge him. Four wins will do for now.

"Alright, chin up Theo." Connor slung his arm around the redhead's shoulder. "I'll help you out, be your wingman for Mac. If something's going to happen, it's gonna happen at the 'Great Bash', right?" Though he sounded confident, he had pretty much no experience in being a wingman, a few tips from Lance here and there but not much else. Hell, between studies and work, he hasn't had much of the fun 'festivities' that came with university life. Still, he'd try his best, Theo was a great guy and deserved a shot atleast.

Location: Dorm -> The Hawk's Nest

Connor's eyes strained as he poured over the pages of code an eigth time. By all accounts it looked fine and it should be working. The ever-familiar throes of a headache bubbled in him. Shit, not again. He thought, swatting at the darkness of his desk in an attempt to find the paracetamol pill bottle. The bottle was swiped off his desk, with a sigh he got up and picked it up; swallowing two pills quickly. With a groan, he stretched; his bones crackling like firework sparklers. The clock had passed with more hours than he thought, he decided that he needed a break.

Soon the reason would present itself as his phone vibrated loudly. It was the location and place for this year's 'Great Bash', he knew it was coming but this was the confirmation. This was the first year he's directly been invited, which felt great. Memories of last years great bash flooded back to him. It was crazy fun and if he had a nickel for every time he was puked on, he'd have three nickels. Three more nickels than he'd prefer. It was an opportunity to party, relax, and take his mind off the project, so he took it, even at the risk of another vomit-a-thon.

Connor would take tens of minutes picking an outfit. It would be better for him if he didn't wear anything too elaborate, he didn't want to burn another set of his favorite clothes. Staring at himself in the mirror, he shrugged. "Eh. This will do."

Stepping out of his room and into the common room he wondered if Alaric would go. He knew Lance was out and going with his sister but he hadn't heard if Alaric planned to attend. Connor knocked on his door. "Alaric, yo, you there?" He called out. "'Great Bash', you goin'? I heard Jasper's coming."

He would knock a few more times but no answer came. With another shrug he set off. Getting into his car a tiny wave of paranoia hit him. Last years 'Bash' was way too much of a close call. He checked his mirrors for anyone watching before turning the ignition and driving off. It was unnecessary but he took a few odd turns here and there before he arrived outside the wooded area.

It wouldn't be a lie to say that Connor was bad at directions. Google maps was the only reason he made it from place to place. He would've roamed aimlessly had he not followed small clumps of people coming and going. Soon the familiar thumping of music and partying entered his ears. This was it. The piercing smell of booze, red cups and beer cans everywhere, drunken students, games- Connor was there, he was in 'The Great Bash'.

The first thing he would do, almost like tradition, was find a table playing beer pong. A doe-eyed freshmen who didn't know Connor got smoked. Each and every ping pong ball thrown by him found it's target and soon the freshmen could barely stand. The older students shot looks of pity at the freshie; they knew that playing beer pong against Connor was effectively suicide. It was an easy way to knock yourself out early in the party. Of course he still had to take a few shots but it wasn't enough to even get a buzz going.

"Comeon!" Connor shouted at gawking onlookers, a cocky grin on his face. "Give me a challenge. Get. Me. Drunk."
Put me down for tentative interest!

Location: Class -> Cafeteria
Time: Morning
Mentions: Felix Ivanov @Otterpop
Interactions: Felix Ivanov @Otterpop, Luke Mayfield @Always, Maxwell Thomas @shylarah, Open



A student in sore need of a haircut introduced himself out of the blue and joined them. He simply gave a curt nod to the long-haired fellow. Next he shot him a confused look at his comment about breakups and Jason wondered if he was talking about him and Felix. Seemed very touchy and physical, he wasn't entirely sure what to think about him.

"Jason." He replied in one, introductory word. Surely they'll get what he meant.

Jason cracked his soda open and began lazily unwrapping his sandwich. Before he could take a bite a familiar face joined him on the not-so-empty-anymore table. It was Maxell, one of the few people who go out of their way to associate with him- not that he mind. From the few interactions they had he seemed like a decent guy; if a bit nosey. In their last meeting he had to defend the doctor-in-training when he tried to optimistically intervene.

"This morning has been tiresome." Jason said in-between bites. He'd rather avoid another reprimand from Maxwell regarding fights. "Nothing like that. Just a very dumb misunderstanding that I don't care to fix."

Halfway through his sandwich he noticed a few students now eyed the peculiar mix of outcasts. It was definitely a weird lineup, he'd say only Maxwell was 'normal', if, again, too nosey for his own good. He'd only heard bits and pieces about Luke, mostly that he had a temper and was a party animal. Felix, well, he may be more of an outcast than Jason.

"Eh." Jason replied to Felix with a blank face, assessing that he was fine if he was that snarky. "Seems like you're not doing a good job; you look more rattled than 'crazy'."

"Maxwell what's your diagnosis on that student over there?" He said half-jokingly, pointing his can towards Felix."He's grinning at his own joke so he may be fine."
Keith Solomon

Malum Island, Campsite



Keith silently eyed his fellow companions and their reactions. Most seemed used to out-of-comfort zone situations such as the one they were in. Though a couple did seem like fish out of water. It was slightly worrying so he made a mental note to keep an eye on them- particularly the skittish Coda and Tony. He followed along the group of DWMA students looking for a particular camp and soon they would find it.

"It does." Keith agreed sleepily, rubbing his eyes. "I am so tired that the dirt floor seems appealing. Other than that it seems like the throbbing headache I got is slowly subsiding... I think. Hurts less." He followed this with a shrug, not wanting to worry his partner more than he already did.

"Sure, anything for my dearest weapon." He replied. Luckily his family had drilled him in survival techniques; setting up a tent is basically step one. It would take him ten minutes to set up the tent as he was familiar with the make and model. Once finished he forced himself not to slink into the comfy, shaded allure of the tent. Nap later, mom would kill me if I slept now. He threw his bag into the tent before leaving.

He stretched his limbs, a real effort to wake up his sleeping limbs. Then he sauntered over to his partner Arlette and rested his elbow on her shoulder. Examining the whiteboard the tasks were clear and made sense for their current situation. Likely the most pressing would be finding edible food and water that wouldn't turn the group into sheep. They had better collect and ration whatever food and water they had on hand.

"Not too shabby." Keith said. "What do you think we should do?"

"Oh right, before I forget. If any of you require assistance in setting up your tent I'll be happy to help." He said outloud, raising his voice higher than he usually does. Hopefully most of the happy campers heard me.
In Avalia 2 mos ago Forum: Casual Roleplay


Time: Night
Location: The Nest -> Inn
Interactions: @Potter - Corvina, @Tae - Kenia, @princess - Malachi.



Rei bit his lip at Kenia's words. He knew of this world's visceral hatred of Aklenroth and his misdeeds but hearing a person's live account of how he sacrifices children made it all too real. This world and it's denizens they were all very real. They all lived a colourful and fruitful life, perhaps even more fruitful than others on his earth. Maybe through disassociation he treated the people of this world as not 'real', like some fever-dream but the account finally made it sink in and click. This was a very real world and that was terrifying to him.

"It's fine, I have alot of experience in dealing with familial drunks." Rei joked, though his tone betrayed him. He gripped his ring necklace, surprising himself at being even able to consciously mention 'family' in a sentence.

Choosing to intentionally ignore Malachi's tears and silently acknowledging his words they made their way into the inn. He would help both the elves and Corvina into their respective rooms and beds.

"If you guys need help I'll be here, just call out." Rei recounted to all three as he laid them down. "I'll stay up and keep watch for a bit. Rest up, we still don't know if the spiked drinks will wear off. Hopefully sooner rather than later."

With that said he got up, splashed water onto his face. Next he pulled up a chair and rested it by the door. He began softly humming a song to himself. It's going to be a long night, isn't it?
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