Lemons

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Alja was feeling...out of sorts.

She thought that she was used to the fatigue of casting spells, and that this was slightly worse. She thought. But it seemed like it was more than just slightly worse. She was almost on autopilot, barely even conscious. She'd need to be whole lot more careful with spellcasting from that point on, or else things would start going wrong.

By the time she was out of her fugue state, she realized that she was past the door. And of all people, Graves had carried Seele to safety. She felt bile rise in her throat at how little use she'd been throughout that entire ordeal, but rapidly discarded it. It seemed like the devs were starting to implement updates that were messing with the basic systems of the game. Under the circumstances, she could hardly be blamed for trying something that had worked countless times before.

Then, as the door slammed shut behind them--her autopiloted state slackening until she felt in control again--things only began to get worse. Alja had never used her console for magic; she didn't use it much in day-to-day Pariah life in general. Primordial magic, combined with a fairly straightforward playstyle, resulted in a pretty menu-free game. She heaved in another deep breath. "No worries, everyone. 'S probably fine. 'Member a few months back, when the menu didn't come up because of software updates screwing with it? I'm sure it's all good..."

Then her words died on her tongue; before them was the signature bright flash of light that signaled a game attendant. She heaved out a sigh of relief. No doubt, they would explain that they were rolling out some new test changes--or maybe glitches, she couldn't quite tell what they might be--but it wasn't panning out, so they would be rolling them right back in pretty shortly. They had absolute control over the game world, after all, and could modify however they chose. They were basically gods. Then, Aag's group and their own would be free to complete the dungeon without worrying about random spikes of actual pain biting into their gameplay, and she could get that goddamn soup she wanted. She was still hungry, damnit.

But as she listened to the attendant--she'd never heard one break character before--she bit of relief she felt was replaced with a coldness that radiated through her entire body, and one that had nothing to do with her ice magic. She froze up, her face written with an expression of pure shock.

"...you will die."

You will die.

You will die.

There was a strange keening sound, and it took Alja a belated moment to realize that it was her.

She looked down at her avatar. Alja. The strong backbone of the group. Someone that could be depended on, always, and no matter what. Someone that could serve every role in a party; she could pull mobs and tank them for days. She could deal heavy burst damage with her flail. She could even lockdown and provide some buffs if they needed support. In all senses, the character of Alja was made to be her, and it fit her perfectly, not even so much as a glove as skin.

But in that moment, a high, piercing ringing in her ears as she stared down at her trembling hands in shock, Alja suddenly felt far too large.

Before she knew what she was doing--before a conscious thought could even pierce through the turmoil that her head had become, the massive, heavily-armored woman had curled into herself. She pedaled her feet frantically backwards, shoving herself into the dungeon wall, as images of her friends and herself bloodied and dying on the floor flashed in front of her eyes. She lifted her hands up, clutching them around her head like they were the only things stopping her brain from leaking out of her ears and splattering bloodied onto the floor. Her throat was sore for some reason.

You will die.

You will die.

You will die.

Suddenly, the world felt far smaller than it should have, and she felt far too large. She huddled tighter into a ball, clutching her head ever harder as tears poured down her face and her open eyes stared unseeing into space..

You will die.
You will die.
You will die.
You will die.
YOU WILL DIE.

Then Alja opened her mouth.

And Kelly screamed.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

In that moment, Alja's thoughts mirrored Graves' words quite well: What the FUCK!?

There was no pain in Pariah; not really. There couldn't be. It was a goddamn game, after all. But c'mon, Graves wasn't that good of an actor. That was real genuine panic in the man, and he was so loath to show weakness, she could only assume that it was real.

Pressing her lips tightly together--business time now--she passed Graves, who'd fallen back into her, off to the rest to take care of. Kazuki could probably heal him up, hopefully without any more pain. She pulled the frost of her Tundra Glass off of Graves, back to herself to replenish her magical reserves. Then, being careful not to stray off the tile she was on, she pulled Glacier Chain off of her back, giving it a few experimental swings. She looked back and forth, making sure that there was sufficient room behind her. She let herself smile a little bit, some of the tension slacking out of her; she'd pulled this trick on pressure plates a thousand times, it felt like.

Then she heaved the enormous flail over her head and slammed it into the floor with a wordless bellow.

Her conjuration shot out through the weapon, and with a sound like a pane of glass breaking, a river of ice flowed out over the floor like quicksilver, sinking into the cracks between the tiles and freezing fast, covering it in a thin layer of ice. It passed Seele's barrier, reaching the door at the end in a little less then five seconds before halting, creating a narrow path no more than two feet wide. She tentatively stepped forward, putting her weight on the tile. There was a faint crackling sound and she tensed to throw herself back, but then it settled and held. She let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding, and then stood. Oddly shakily, actually. She was used to the concept of fatigue in Pariah--magic needed a limit, after all, and that was a pretty good-sized conjuration spell, one that she only had enough fuel for one or two of in her at any given time--but she'd never felt like this, even after a whole dungeon. She grimaced. Pain. Heat. Fatigue. Smell. This was not looking good.

Then--because of course--just as she stepped forwards, something in the floor shifted, and there was a sound of grinding gears. And in front of her eyes--just past her feet--a veritable forest of spikes lanced up through the floor, punching holes through her ice like it wasn't there and shattering it to shards of mist and magic. Every spike. Everywhere.

Jesus Fixer Christ.

She backed up out of instinct, eyes wide and mouth suddenly dry.

"Well. That...was unexpected."

Lem's Stash

-

Lem's Stash

-

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

As she flicked the last of the goblin blood off Glacier Chain and their cries went silent, Alja snorted in displeasure. She almost wished she were still drunk--so THAT'S what that feels like?--so the damned smell of the goblins wouldn't be as bad. But Graves' blood magic, plus the excessively hot and humid day...more so than any other she could remember experiencing in Pariah, actually, now that she thought about it...had her sobered up relatively quickly. And now that she was sober, she came to another strange realization: she'd never felt hunger in PO before. But the way her stomach was pinching up was unmistakable, and she found herself wishing even more that she'd snagged one of Seele's sandwiches back in the tavern.

The first goblins they'd encountered were...well. Low-level mooks, at best. And that bothered her too. No ambush in the approach to the dungeon, and now that they were INSIDE of the main structure...just goblins? Something about it didn't sit right with her. She almost wanted to bring it up, and maybe call the whole thing off. But, she grimaced, the group would never go for that. They were here for a raid, and they were going to get that damn raid. Without her, it would just take longer, and the less time they had to spend raiding with this weird series of glitches or features--whatever they were--the better.

A brief conversation was had regarding the murals--ah, Graves, what a charmer--before they formed up in their separate groups, ready to split, as she did, Alja called over to her friend:

"Hey, Leafy! If we beat this raid, I'll make you that steel warbow you wanted a while back, and a whole quiver of arrows for it! I've got the mats now, so count on it!"

Satisfied, she stretched, rolling her head and cracking her knuckles as she joined her raid team, just as Seele was finished up giving a cute little pep talk. "Right, I'm all specced for max damage, ready to go." Glacier Chain took on a dangerous glint as unstable Tundra Glass crystals coalesced on it, just waiting for an impact to set them free. Then, right as she felt the tension building in her stomach knot harder, Alex raised...a really, really good point, actually. And the tension began to untwist a little. "Know what, Alex? You're probs right. The sudden dungeons rising, the weird glitch-like stuff; really feels like a hidden local update, now you mention it." She sighed with a measure of relief.

"Anyway," she began, "I'll take left flank, a little closer to the front so I can buff up Rael if I need to. If you're cool with that, all?" She looked back and forth between Rael, Graves and Benkei, waiting for the go-ahead to get into position and falling back into the old stance, flail on her shoulder. I'm getting nervous over nothing. I'll clear, then I can log off and...I dunno, make some soup.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

"'M...fine, Raylll," Alja slurred out, surprising herself with just how indistinct her words were. Somethin's wrong. Somethin's wrong. Still, she tried not to let her concern show on her face, attempting to get up again before falling back down in a gross display of miscoordination. "'M jus'...dizzy for sum reason. Dunno why." She rubbed at her eyes aggressively, trying to will her vision back to clarity and somehow being surprised when it didn't work.

She tried to stand again, and this time she managed to make it to her feet, supporting herself on the table and breathing deeply as a denizen came over, concern on her face. Alja waved her away, but removing one of her hands from her support table had the reasonably predictable outcome of her barely managing to stay on her feet. She turned to face Graves, frowning as she found it difficult to see his face clearly; it kept swimming in and out of focus. "'S gotta be...debuff or som'thin,' righ?'. 'M real dizzy..." she brought her hand up to her face, feeling the heat rushing through it as her normally fair skin was suffused a bright red by...whatever this was.

She sat down again, grunting in mild irritation as the waitress continued hovering out of something like concern. And, it occurred to Alja, there was something she could use at the moment. She waved the waitress over and, voice still slurred, asked: "C'n you get me some water?"

She nodded and scurried off, and Alja slumped back down, her eyes drawn as if magnetically to the blurry image of a tearfully happy Luci being congratulated by everyone in the bar, and Aaginim standing next to her. She looked on, the previously confused expression on her face replaced with what seemed like an almost comical melancholy. "Sh'd b'mm," she mumbled, her face lying sideways on the table and distorting her mouth to the point of incoherence.

Then--for the first time in a long time--some of her IRL self leaked into Alja, and she pivoted her head until she was looking at Graves almost piteously. And in that moment, she looked almost as small as her real-world counterpart. "'M I gonna be okay, Graves?"

Then the moment passed, and she slumped back into the table with a dizzy groan.

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Speaking of Aaginim's announcements...

Alja was happy for Luci. She really, really was. She'd never seen the other woman looking as joyful as she was at that exact moment, and she took a mental snapshot of it, hoping she'd be able to remember it forever. But still, it wasn't all happiness. She frowned a little bit, looking at Luci's happy face, and at Aaginim next to her. She was feeling...

And then her thoughts trailed off.

She was feeling...weird. As she moved away from Benkei and towards Luci--intent on congratulating her, and burying the little nugget of discontent that burrowed into her heart--the room spun around her. She pitched to her side with a gasped "huh?"

It was like a switch had been flipped inside her, and suddenly, she was feeling all fuzzy. And it wasn't even that severe of a feeling; it was just so...so weird and unexpected that she lurched to the side, whacking her thigh into a table with a loud bonk. She shook her head; it reminded her of when she was a little kid, and she twirled around outside until she fell down. That, combined with a little bit of a fever? She'd never felt anything quite like it, and it occurred to her that she might've been hit with a debuff of some kind. But she didn't have PvP toggled; she even opened her menu, fumbling with it like a newbie, to check.

She carefully rotated herself around the table and slouched down into a chair, staring at her hands in confusion, and all she managed was a quiet, uncoordinated "...what...?"

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Aaginim's announcement came faster than she'd expected, but hey, the faster they took on the dungeon, the better, right? Still. She couldn't say she was super happy with the teams.

Keep the smile up, don't let it get to you.

Alja liked most people she met in Pariah, but she did not like Benkei. Like Luci, he was competent. Staggeringly competent (though probably not as much as Luci). But that's where the similarities ended between them. Luci was good at what she did, but she didn't look down at others worse than she was. She was, above all, professional. And she showed professional courtesy. Alja'd run exactly one raid with Benkei as a DPS, and he had strained her good-natured patience to its absolute limit, micromanaging every little thing she did, lambasting her for every decimal below the the other damage dealers she was.

More to the point, though, as far as they'd interacted--which, granted, wasn't a lot--she didn't think he was expert in conflict resolution. And with Graves, Kalie and Rael all in the same party, that was probably going to be a necessary skill. Let's hope they can keep it civil while we're in the dungeon, or else there's gonna be some problems.

She heaved a heavy sigh, exhaling the frustration. No point in fretting over it now, after all. She'd just need to make sure she did her best in the raid to keep Benkei happy, and hopefully everyone would play nice. So now the question was: what exactly would she be doing during the raid?

Right. Let's see...Rael and Benkei to tank, then Graves, Kalie and the new kid, whatshisname...Alex for DPS. Two supports. She blew up at a strand of hair that fell over her face, thinking about her role. I could go DPS, split it evenly down the middle, but there are already two melee DPS and I don't wanna step on their toes, get in their way. Hmm.

She picked up her backpack and retrieved Glacier Chain from where she'd left it by the table, then clomped up to Benkei--he seemed to be talking to the girl with the sandwiches from earlier (Alja was still sad she hadn't been able to eat one)--and tapped him on the shoulder. "Yo, Benkei. You're the boss. Should I go in expectin' to tank or DPS?" She motioned to her heavy armor. "Gotta make sure I got the right gear equipped for the job, ya dig?"

She peered over Benkei's head at the support--Seele, probably, she knew almost everyone's names now and she didn't seem like a Kazuki, and the boy near Benkei certainly didn't seem like a Seele--and gave her an apologetic glance. "Sorry to cut you off, I'd just like to know my role early. I'm Alja."

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

Alja huffed out a relieved sigh when Luci came along and broke up Graves and Rael. Stepping backwards out of the maelstrom's center, she smiled in an altogether different way than usual as she watched the rest of the scene play out; a soft grin, with a bit of an amused tilt at the corners. More catlike than her usual bombast. She loved watching Luci put people in their places. She'd grouped with the DPS on occasion, and she'd been an absolute joy to work with every time. Yeah, she was competent--way past competent actually, better than Alja by a long shot--but that wasn't super important to Alja. Rather, what was important was that Luci was just...fun. Once you dug past the ice-queen politeness, there was a certain streak of dry, deadpan humor that made it a total joy to banter with her. And for the cherry on top, their playstyles gelled together pretty well too. Of all the people she'd met in Pariah, Luci was probably the one she liked the most--maybe with a single exception--even if they didn't end up seeing each other very often.

Not to mention, she chuckled to herself, she knows how to keep Rael in line. And that takes some doing.

A few minutes passed; Alja spent them making small talk with some of the denizens and smaller-name Wayfarers in the guild hall, downing ale all the while. She'd just finished a showcase of Tundra Glass to a couple new players--they were moderately impressed with her fairly high-level and very specialized conjuration tricks--when she heard Luci come up behind her, commenting on the altercation between the two hotheaded players from earlier. She laughed, slapping the other woman on the shoulder (it was a greeting that she used often) and chugging down another drink of the digitized alcohol.

"Too long for sure, Luci! Goddamn, it's nice to see you!" She pulled the other woman into a crushing, bearlike hug, taking her time--a good five seconds--before releasing her "When was the last time, anyway? Was it that time I tried to duel Aag and he wiped the floor with me, or was it one of the dungeons? Never had the best memory." She pondered a moment, then her face broke out in a massive grin. "Well, who gives a shit anyway? It'll be good to work together again!"

Only after her rambling was over did she address the first comment that Luci had made. Her smile became a rueful grin, and she rubbed the back of her head. "Ah, I don't know exactly what I was thinkin'. Kinda thing I said is exactly what stokes Rael and Graves, gets 'em riled up. Only way it coulda been worse is if I put loot on the table and started taking bets." She shrugged her massive shoulders, leaning back against the table. "Still, kept 'em from each others' throats long enough for you to roll on up so...success!"

She was about to say something else, leaning in, when she paused: someone was talking over near Graves. Someone that she hadn't seen in just as long as Luci, and someone that she missed even more. Her eyes lit up, and her grin--rueful as had been--bloomed into something almost manic. She bounced on her heels, and then, with a quick "hang on!, she was bolting her not-inconsiderable mass over towards the green-haired girl and launching a huge flying tackle-hug at the exception: her favorite partner in crime.

"YO LEAFY! LET'S PAINT THE FUCKIN' TOWN!"

Pariah Online: A Voyage into the Intangible Aether

---

As the guild hall slowly grew noisier around her, Alja drained the rest of her tankard, then turned to the guy--looked like some kind of archer, ranged DPS, or maybe a CC-based support?--who'd just sat down next to them. She raised the empty mug, smiling at him.

"Yeah, raid group's here. Sorry that they're all like this, most of 'em aren't very good at being social a lot of the time." She winked at Kalie, her smile remaining to show she meant no real offense, then turned back to the newcomer. "Don't worry about it, though. Stick with me, you'll be okay. Name's Alja, just holler for me if you need some defensive buffs or there's some add that won't get his ass off you. Now, if you'll excuse me," she laughed and stood, cracking her neck as she looked at what seemed an imminent fight between Graves and Rael and oh boy was Alja not ready for that before the raid even started, "I think I need to go keep some people in line so we don't kill each other. Be back in a minute." She turned back to Kalie, giving her a wide grin. "And please, Kalie; don't turn the kid into some servant of a dark god before I get back, alright?"

Leaving the brown-haired, nondescript archer behind and turning her back on Kalie, she marched on over to the brewing fight, shouldering her way between the two of them and spreading her arms, pushing a hand into each of their chests none-too-gently to force them apart. She gave a brief apologetic look to the confused (somewhat underleveled-looking) mage between them.

Alja had always prided herself on being a friendly presence, someone you could laugh and maybe drink a couple beers with, no matter who you were. But she had no patience for people who put other's games at risk. Dungeons could take hours, maybe days to fully clear, and while she was happy to waste her own time, wasting other peoples' didn't sit right with her. If these two bickered enough to cause a wipe, then they'd need to start the whole damn thing over from scratch, and they probably wouldn't even get the first clear that so many of them wanted. So she needed to try nipping this problem in the bud.

"I swear, you two," she said, laugh gone from her tone, "we haven't even started the raid yet. Hell, I don't even know if the whole group is here. But here you two are, goin' at it, already about to kill each other. Did you forget that this is unfamiliar territory? I'm sure you'd be fine doing this at the Alcara Temple or the Astral Tower. Hell, you're good enough to probably pull off the Deepfire Crypt like this. But new dungeon, new tricks. This is fully endgame content. We're gonna need to work together very well, or else this raid is going to chew us up and spit us out like nothin'." She held up one of her hands, a violent ice-storm barely contained in her magical grip, and looked back and forth between the two of them. "Now are the two of you going to cool your heads, or am I gonna need to cool 'em for you?"

After a moment, her thunderhead eyebrows lightened, and she banished the cloud of Primordial ice, slapping Graves on the shoulder. "Anyway, now that that's over, wanna get a drink?"