Recent Statuses

6 mos ago
Current Welcome to Lemons' fourth year on RPGuild. PRAISE BE!
1 yr ago
They will look for him from the white tower...but he will not return, from mountains or from sea...
1 yr ago
1 like
1 yr ago
Thirty four.
1 like
2 yrs ago
Never eat the lemons alone. My friend? He at the lemons alone. I had to put him down once he started to salivate.


User has no bio, yet

Most Recent Posts

I'd be down.
@TheWindel That could be possible.
Oh shit I was waiting for Zesty. I'll get on that.
@Grey It's a sub-element. Condiment is def an element though.
yo speaking of trickstery fae mages
God you guys are good writers. Lurking this after Gaius retired is the best decision I've ever made on this site.

Hey, you may or may not remember me (probably not, all things considered) as that one guy that dropped in for a little bit in Chapter 1 and played an agoraphobic Indian lady. Either way, I've gotten shit together in my life and now I'm ready to actually play the game! Hope nobody minds if I donk this down in prep. for Chapter 3!

Matthew Blair Winslow




5'11" (about 180cm)

130 or so lbs. (about 59-60kg)

Cloudy days (the darker the better), cold weather (but not too cold, ideally just about 40F and just enough for him to flaunt his longcoat), savory foods (as long as it's not spicy), knives (he has a collection of nearly 50 pieces that he's very proud of), small furry animals like puppies and kittens (but don't tell anybody).

Overly sweet food (every time he eats dessert he feels the need to brush his teeth ten times over), bright sunlight (he burns really easily), big animals (pretty much anything larger than a great Dane), swimming (he's not very comfortable in the water as a whole), very to-the-point people (they tend to be more resistant to his brand of BS, so they ruin his fun).

Zodiac Sign

Gemini (June 6th)

Special Talent

Matthew is remarkably good at telling stories. While he could use this to a much greater effect than he does (he could probably become a bestselling novelist if he put his mind to it), he finds it much easier and more enjoyable to use that ability to tell wild stories to jerk people around as much as he can by spinning intricate and convincing lies, whether it's to serve a purpose like getting free food or just to have fun. He's...not the most fun to have around at a party, really.

As an outgrowth of this propensity, he's also become rather skilled at faking emotions. He can do killer crocodile tears. Don't believe him for a second.


Works as a printer at the Star Messenger, hoping to break into a leadership role eventually but probably not realistically going to. He also writes short stories and pawns them off on the internet to make some money here and there.


Welcome to Sol City, population: Matthew.

Or at least that's how he sees it.

Matthew is, well. He's not the one that people like very much after they've gotten to know him for a little while, but upon first impression, he's actually not that bad. While not cripplingly shy by any stretch of the imagination, he's just timid enough to be friendly, or at least bearable. Then...then you get to know him better. And oh, what a 'getting-to-know-you' it ends up being. By the time you figure out that he was probably lying to you about half of what he said for no other reason than kicks, you're already probably down a couple bucks for 'subway fare' that he's probably juggling around his hands and laughing to himself as he walks down the sidewalk. Sometimes he won't even ask for money; the work itself is the reward, as they say. He adores the feeling of lying to people and getting away with it, and there probably aren't two people in all of Sol City that he's told the same life story to, if he's ever felt in the mood to do such a thing. But hey, every con artist has a start somewhere, right?

Most people that know of Matthew assume that he had a terrible upbringing to go with his seeming amorality and general assholish-ness. That's just not true. Actually, he had a pretty easy childhood. Born and raised in Sol City to a young British couple, his early life was actually quite cushy. And for the first leg of his life, he was actually a really nice kid. He would regularly come home from elementery and middle school as the teacher's favorite kid in the class. He was a little bit less social than his parents would've liked, but all in all? Everything seemed like it was going fantastic.

And then, as so often the case, high school came around to ruin everything. That's not to say he started doing poorly in school or anything; to the contrary, he was pretty much at the top of his class. But then he took two classes that made his life what it is today: creative writing, and philosophy. He aced them without even trying. He had something of a knack for those two talents; making stories, and arguing well. Arguing obnoxiously well. Twisting peoples' words back around on them became something of an addiction for him, and within that semester he'd begun to develop into what he would become later on in life. The final nail in the coffin came when he received his letter of acceptance from Solaris University (he refuses to use the real name, which he views as vastly pretentious), whereupon he ceased all pretense of being a decent person.

He coasted through college, or at least tried to. In the end, he found that college was a lot harder than he'd given it credit for, and found that he needed a form of stress relief. Luckily for him, he had a whole new public to manipulate at his leisure, and he began to do so with gusto. Most of the people that he'd connected with eventually ducked out on him instead of being associated with the local freshman asshole, but he had a close cadre of friends, just enough so as to not attempt to become a better person through isolation. Eventually he graduated with a major in Creative Writing and a minor in Journalism and set about to making it somewhere in the world. He managed to get a job at the local newspaper and an apartment, and the rest is pretty much current. So what this has essentially all been is a long, roundabout way of saying that there's no real reason for him to be an asshole to people. He just is, because it's what he finds fun.

Matthew's Favorite Song

Chopin's Nocturne in E Minor, Posth. 72. Turns out that Matt is a fan of classical. Who'da guessed?

Unfortunately, I don't watch enough movies or TV to give an actor for my boy.

*Your age: Just cracked into my third decade.
*What part of the world are you from? Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Brotherly love, baby!
*How many years have you been writing/roleplaying: A long time. I mean, that doesn't mean I'm good at it. I've just been doing it for a while.
*How often do you have time to post? As long as I don't drop of the face of the Earth again (and if I do I'll let you know), anywhere from every two days to once a week, depending on workload, motivation, how much (or little) sleep I've been getting, and general inebriation.
*Anything else you want to mention? What you do for a living? How much do you work a week? What do you enjoy doing besides writing? Put as much as you want. Do you ever realize how underappreciated lemons are? I mean yeah, sometimes you'll find people grating lemon zest or using juice as a condiment (and that's not mentioning lemonade), but come on. This is perhaps the most delicious citrus fruit that yet lives. Bunch'a ingrates, I tells ya.
Yo, bet. Sounds great.
© 2007-2017
BBCode Cheatsheet