Some time after concluding with training Rudolf for the day, Izayoi could be found preparing the party’s nightly meal, sitting with Goug while stirring a cookpot over the fire. Dinner for tonight seemed to be some sort of meat stew, with root vegetables being added in.
As Chisato approached, Goug looked up with a wave.
”Oi, new girl! Dinner’s nearly finished, kupo. Just take a seat and wait, will you?”
—It’s strange.
I knew before coming here that she was alive. I’d been told beforehand. So it’s not necessarily that her appearance here is surprising to me, anymore, even as I approach to sit down and await a meal.
But it’s strange.
Ranbu no Izayoi’s death had seemed so certain until only recently.
She clearly wasn’t some form of spectre or phantom, stirring the pot over the fire like that. She was certainly no imposter, I knew that much.
So exactly how is it that she is standing here, living and breathing, before my eyes?
One look at Chisato was all Izayoi needed to know.
”You have questions.” The older woman sighed as she sprinkled a measure of salt into the stew. ”Ask, then. Though I could infer the first.”
”Oh kupo, this is going to get heavy, isn’t it?” Goug murmured, sliding off the log he was sitting on. ”Should I…” He jerked a thumb behind him, gesturing as if he was to leave.
”Yes.”
Goug didn’t need any more confirmation, flapping his wings away back towards the rest of the camp.
She noticed.
I don’t think I wanted her to. Even if I have questions, it’s not necessary to have them answered immediately. Provided we can both operate in achieving our goals without these answers, there is not any need to rush.
I’m not really prepared to ask them.
I really should have expected someone like Ranbu no Izayoi noticing how I was looking.
I take a deep breath.
“How are you alive?”
There’s no need to be anything less than direct.
”Through no intention of my own.” Izayoi replied glibly, sampling a small sip of the bubbling stew with her ladle as she frowned. Hm. It needed pepper. And perhaps a touch more salt.
”When I made my stand at the border, I had no illusions of surviving the battle. But the Edrenians were in too great a hurry to rush for the capital to confirm my death. I was left crumpled at the foot of the mountain, slowly dying. A local healer from the nearby village came across me. He saved my life, involuntary though it was.”
Ah, there it was. Izayoi found the black pepper in the cooking supplies, taking care to add a generous measure to the pot, along with another few dashes of salt.
”When I came to, I believed that there would be no more use for a defeated general. I had failed the nation and the Emperor. And I had grown tired of leading my countrymen to their deaths. Of massacring soldiers that could rightfully still be called boys, not men. So I allowed the outside world to believe that I was dead. That healer? We wed. I bore him a child. And so I laid down my sword for five years, until Valheim destroyed that village.”
She lifted her gaze back up in Chisato’s direction, waiting to determine the shinobi’s response.
”Does that satisfy your curiosity?”
“...”
I wasn’t sure what to expect. I had figured, perhaps, that she’d managed to cling to life. But I hadn’t known how. The fact a healer had met her explained it, somewhat… But the fact she laid down her sword for so long was—
It doesn’t make sense. I can’t wrap my brain around it. Ranbu no Izayoi settling down, after everything she had done? Her reasons—
She had used our services, hadn’t she? Did the age of combatants matter to her all along, and she hadn’t shown it at the height of the war?
If she’d been able to fight that whole time, couldn’t it possibly, maybe—
No.
I cut myself off from those thoughts.
I cannot think like that. There’s no need to think like that.
I must remain focused on the mission without any other reservations or concerns.
“I… I see.”
I nod slowly, quietly to myself, trying to push any other questions from my mind.
But they continue to fight their way to the surface. There’s no need. And yet—
“... If you had—”
My words die. I kill them dead on my lips.
Such a question helps nothing.
Begrudging her choice to lay down her sword helps nothing.
Izayoi sighed at Chisato’s response. She shouldn’t have expected anything else from the girl. That was the problem with the godsdamned Asakura shinobi. Fantastic at what they did, but they’d sacrificed every aspect of their humanity in the process. Even more than Izayoi had.
”If I had…?” She began slowly, already knowing what the girl was trying to ask.
”If I had retained my strength? I consider that question on a daily basis, girl. At the very least, there would have been some people I’d manage to save from Valheim in that case.” She closed her eyes, letting the stew simmer for the moment.
”I do not regret starting a family. I do not believe I ever will. All I do regret is thinking there was no more need for my sword. If you wish to condemn me for my choices, then so be it. I do so every time I remember my husband and daughter dead at Valheimr hands.”
She hadn’t said as much until now, but the mere fact she was here made it obvious that her family no longer lived.
The fact that Valheim had destroyed the village, alone…
I open my mouth, and softly, silently, shut it.
Her husband and daughter, dead.
If she’d retained her strength, couldn’t she have protected them? Wouldn’t that have been right, rather than letting her—
If I’d sacrificed myself, maybe the others would still be—
…
I find my gaze has drifted downwards. My fingers slowly tightening at my clothing, unconsciously.
There was no need to think of that, was there? Doing so would only distract me. This whole line of questioning would only pull my mind further from my duties.
This mission is far more important than anything else.
“Almost all of the others are dead.”
And yet, those words leave my lips all the same.
There was no need to share that information. There was no need to tell her.
But I said it anyway.
It’s foolish, isn’t it?
It has to be.
The Asakura clan, all but wiped out? Izayoi took a slow breath at that, marshaling her thoughts. For shinobi, that sort of casualty rate couldn’t even be called catastrophic: it was nothing short of apocalyptic. And as for Chisato…
The poor girl. Izayoi knew her temperament. To even admit that was tantamount to a breakdown for someone that hadn’t trained in the Asakura’s ways. Sympathy welled up in the samurai’s chest as she rose, slowly walking over to where the viera sat. A hand rose to rest on the girl’s shoulder, squeezing lightly.
”I know very well how little condolences are worth, but you have mine nonetheless. Valheim’s debt of blood will be paid one day.” She murmured softly, very carefully not asking what happened. The girl would tell her on her own time. ”How have you chosen to proceed from here, then? Will you return to your duty, or seek vengeance in their memory?”
—It’s unnecessary. She doesn’t need to tell me these things. I know that mission was a failure. I know that everything went wrong. I know that I could have done something different.
But my entire generation was either dead or crippled, now. That was the reality of the situation. So the answer is obvious from the very beginning.
“I have to fulfill my duty,” I reply. I won’t allow myself even a moment to falter. I cannot. Those tears only distracted me, “The only other remaining shinobi of my generation are unable to fight any longer, so there is no longer anyone else who can carry it out.”
I have to bear the weight of my generation. Sensei cannot carry out these duties. Lord Asakura-sama cannot. They are preoccupied elsewhere. The previous generation’s numbers are low now, too.
And maybe, while carrying out my duty, I’ll be able to—
“For the sake of all the remaining Asakura, that is my purpose.”
”Very well. Fortunate for you that accompanying us will allow you to engage in both, regardless. Our path is inevitably crossed with Valheim’s, despite the fact that they’ve not accosted us since we’ve stepped foot within this land.” Izayoi returned to minding the cookpot, stirring it lightly.
”The Edreni. Will they be a problem for you? The dragoon leads us, as I’ve no wish to do so, myself.”
Ranbu no Izayoi’s question pulls my mind away from recollection of that day.
The Edreni—
Edreni men can lead. I know that much. That doesn’t mean that I appreciate it, but they can lead.
That does not mean I trust them on an individual basis to do so, however.
“They will be fools, to me, until they prove otherwise. That is the state of all Edreni men.”
I fold my arms across my chest with a small nod.
“But as he has led so far, I will wait and see how he conducts himself.”
The dragoon doesn’t seem like an idiot, despite being an Edreni man, so at the very least I can afford to judge him more harshly over time rather than immediately.
Should he prove to be foolish, I will have plenty of complaints.
A nod. Both an expected answer, and one Izayoi wasn’t going to contest. As much as she would never admit it out loud, her hostility towards Galahad had dropped sharply in the past few weeks. Well, ever since the revelation about his brother, really. And Rudolf never earned her ire for anything aside from his background to begin with. That didn’t mean she didn’t still hate Edren, but personal allegiances were different.
The stew seemed about ready, and Izayoi rose to grab the bowls Goug had left.
”Dinner will be served shortly.” She took a bowl and ladled up a bowl of thick stew, piled high with meat and root vegetables, handing it along with a spoon to Chisato.
”Eat. The fact that your size has remained the same after five years tells me that you could do with a more substantive diet.”
“...”
I’m not about to pass up food when it is offered, but… I need far less than this to remain nourished. I have plenty of riceballs packed, this clearly isn’t necessary, is it? Any shinobi worth their salt can survive on a single riceball per day.
Not that I should never eat more than that, but when we’re in the process of travelling, is this necessary?
I regard the stew for a few moments. It seems… very heavy. Not bad, but certainly a very heavy meal. Is it good for traveling? Perhaps it is, but—
I sternly interrogate the meat and vegetables with my eyes.
“It is… a lot,” I finally respond, placing the spoon slowly to the stew after a few moments. It’s not as if I can reject it…
”As I intended, yes.” Izayoi folded her arms as she sat back down, her stare unwavering.
”I am more than aware that you shinobi can survive on far less. In a situation of desperation. This is not one of those. As such, it would benefit everyone involved were you properly nourished.” She said firmly, her tone brooking no argument. Gods above, was this a conversation that would have happened in a better time? If Suzume had turned out to be a picky eater? Or any other potential children?
Her expression darkened at the thought before forcing it down into the recesses of her mind. No going down that direction. It led to nothing but pain. Instead, Izayoi focused back on the present, her eyes narrowing at Chisato.
”Consider this a direct order. Eat your dinner, and cease complaining that you’re fed more than a bowl of rice.” Or else she’d shove it down the girl’s throat.
“... Very… very well…”
Does she really need to waste these resources on me…?
I raise the spoon to my lips, a fragment of carrot and a chunk of beef sitting in the dark broth, and take a bite—
Ah.
The beef is very tender. It’s simple, but well-seasoned. The carrot adds another layer of texture to the meal, breaking up the heaviness and fattiness of the broth and the meat and increasing its depth despite utilizing simple ingredients. The broth is smooth and rich, complimenting the texture of the beef and the carrot(and presumably the other vegetables) excellently.
It requires a certain level of dedication to prepare food with so little available and make it truly flavorful and delicious.
Ranbu no Izayoi did not have complex cookery on hand, and yet she has still accomplished this much—
I lower the spoon back into the bowl.
It’s not as if I’ll reject food, after all.
At the very least, the girl enjoyed the food. Good. It seemed she hadn’t lost her touch after more than a few months away from a cookpot, even working with less than familiar materials. Izayoi puffed up slightly in satisfaction with that.
”Better.” She said, folding her arms. ”You’ll be fed the same as any other member of the party whilst you remain with us, so do try not to protest against eating again.” A gesture brought Goug back over, the moogle sniffing the air briefly.
”Food’s ready, kupo?” At Izayoi’s nod, he sped off to gather the rest of the Kirins up for dinner. In the meanwhile, Izayoi looked back over to Chisato, her expression softening somewhat.
”If you’ve no further questions…?”
I place the spoon back down again.
‘No further questions’?
Maybe it would be untrue to say yes. There’s a great many things that I could ask about, I’m certain, if I put my mind to it for a few moments. Questions about the others, about how they came together. I knew in broad strokes how the current Kirins had formed, but only insofar as I was told for the sake of my mission.
There’s plenty of details I could seek. I could even ask if there’s a chance we would mee—
No.
It’s not necessary. Not a single question is necessary, not really. Unless it’s required for me to fulfill my duty, I don’t need to ask about anything at all.
That’s how it should be. That’s how I should operate. It’s better for everyone involved if I focus on my mission, as anything else could simply get in the way.
If something gets in the way, I’m not operating at my fullest extent.
I nod, slowly.
I don’t have any more questions.
Member
Savo,
Xaltwind,
The World,
Antlers,
Fish of Oblivion,
Scrawl Banditta,
Bacon,
Jinxxed,
Lunamaria Hawke,
Vapor
