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3 mos ago
Current As a GM, I hate all my players in particular
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7 mos ago
joining the war on smoking, on the side of smoking
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8 mos ago
as a patreon reward I will read your least favorite person's handmade custom tabletop RPG homebrew and ask them why they didn't just run it in 5e instead
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10 mos ago
I started RP before double digit age but you couldn't have gotten an admission I was under 18 under threat of death. Kids just casually admiting it online now is wild.
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12 mos ago
the whole subway's mine for the slammin'
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sneed

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Oh yes, Ganon, get pissy at us because we want something that you could have done months ago. Interest checks aren't that hard to do, you know.
Story of my life there, bro.
Fish of Oblivion said
@Ganon: Actually, could you just go and be a dear and go make S11? Remember, this is the S5 thread. You're technically not even supposed to be posting in it. You have your own thread and RP to make up. :P


So I owe Ob an omake. Here you go, fucker. Part one of god knows how many. I totally haven't been playing too many Metal Gear games lately.

___

November 15, 2020
Hong Kong, People's Republic of China


BanchoLeomon leapt out of a maintenance hatch into a dimly-lit hallway.

"I'm in. Kept you waiting, huh?"

"So, you remember the mission objectives?"

"Yes, Siggy. We've only gone over the plan ten times." BanchoLeomon hissed into his radio headset. "Infiltrate Bloodhound Security's headquarters, confirm if they're performing illegal experiments on Digimon and Tamers, and shut them down if possible." He drew a suppressed USP Tactical pistol from inside his coat and carefully began proceeding down the hallway. "We're lucky that whoever tipped us off about Bloodhound also gave us the blueprints for their headquarters. Bit too convenient, but it's not like we can ignore the bait this time."

"Just be careful," Siggy warned from over the radio. "I've gotten reports that Bloodhound's hired Tamers as mercenaries. All three of their top-level commanders have been confirmed to be capable of Biomerging, too. Secondary objective is to take them down if you can."

"I know." BanchoLeomon responded as he peeked around a corner, seeing a patrolling mercenary come walking down the hall. "Even the Japanese government still has more faith in private military companies that employ Tamers than they do in ATLAS. Not surprising, too, considering we're barely a few months old." As the patrol walked past, BanchoLeomon reached out and wrapped the man around in a chokehold, raising his pistol to the man's head. "Which way to the labs?"

"T-two floors up. You'll never get past the security gate, though..." The man rasped out before BanchoLeomon slammed his pistol into the man's temple, knocking him out. With that, he began making his way through the building, stealthily killing whatever guards he ran into.

"By the way, our insider's sent me an IFF code and a comlink frequency. Seems he'll be meeting up with you soon."
___

Some time later, BanchoLeomon entered a large chamber, leveling his pistol as he looked around the room. The security gate that the guard mentioned was right across the room...but a figure stood waiting in front of it. A yellow-and-black hornet Digimon stood before him, clutching dual swords. BanchoLeomon scowled before he holstered his pistol and drew his sword.

"Roman Nikolaev." He recognized the Digimon from the briefing he'd been given. "Ex-Spetsnaz, partnered to a FanBeemon. I see you knew I was coming."

"Lucas Seyour and Leomon. Everyone knows who you are, especially after the Toyko Incident has been declassified." TigerVespamon replied in a heavy Russian accent, tapping the headset that he was wearing before brandishing his swords in a fighting stance. Frowning, BanchoLeomon readied his own blade before a thought occurred to him. It was a long shot, but it was the only logical conclusion. Wordlessly, he entered the comlink frequency that Siggy had given him and spoke into his headset.

"Ty slyshish' menya?"

"Ah, good. You catch on quickly." TigerVespamon replied over the comlink, speaking through his own headset. "Your Russian is very good, by the way." And then TigerVespamon charged, delivering two strikes that were quickly parried. "Speak over the comlink only. We are being watched, tovarich."

"You attack me, and then call me 'comrade'?" BanchoLeomon replied with a hiss, locking blades with TigerVespamon. "Trying to put on a show for your boss?" He leveled his sword with a roar and forced his foe back before slamming his foot into TigerVespamon's chest, sending him flying into the wall.

"Do not worry. We merely need to keep this up until we can destroy the cameras in the room. A mere side effect of such a fierce battle, if you catch my drift." TigerVespamon said as he launched himself towards BanchoLeomon once more.

"So, care to tell me why you're selling your own company out?" BanchoLeomon asked casually as the two traded blows, a stray strike from TigerVespamon destroying a security camera on the wall.

"This PMC is the only company that will hire a Tamer, but everything here is polnyi pizdets." TigerVespamon spat as he ducked under a slash from BanchoLeomon's sword that just happened to slice a camera in half.

"Fucked up, eh? The experiments are as bad as we'd feared, then?" BanchoLeomon parried TigerVespamon's spinning strike, redirecting the blade into a camera on the wall.

"Worse. And that was the last camera, by the way."

BanchoLeomon simply grinned before he hurled his blade at his opponent. Startled, TigerVespamon deflected the sword, knocking it up into the air...only to see the lion Digimon rushing at him with a fist covered in an orange aura. BanchoLeomon Burst Mode slammed a fist into his foe's chest, before following it up with an uppercut that knocked TigerVespamon into a wall hard enough to leave a crater. Raising a hand into the air, BanchoLeomon caught his sword before allowing his aura to dissipate.

"Mode Change..." TigerVespamon groaned, collapsing to the ground. "You were holding back by that much?"

"Yeah." BanchoLeomon snarled, walking past TigerVespamon's prone form. He had even held back with his final strike, withholding enough force to make sure that TigerVespamon hadn't de-Digivolved. "Just remember, I can kill you any time I want. Stab me in the back and you'll regret it."

"Heh..." The bee Digimon smirked appreciatively. "Very wise. Even though I am on your side, I understand your caution." He reached down to a pouch strapped to his pocket, taking out a key card that he handed to BanchoLeomon. "Here. This ID card will get you past the security gate in the next room and up to the labs. I will catch up as soon as I have recovered. Good luck, tovarich."

Part One, END
Is Tob even alive?
mattmanganon said
All the manly tears in the world shed for the finale of Kill La Kill... Now to wait for Trigger's next en-devour.


...That wasn't even a good ending. 5/10 ending, 8/10 for series total.

I'm sorry, but I can't take the ending seriously when it's literally just Sonic Adventure 2.

Vocalia said
So... I finally played a legit tabletop Dark Heresy today. Needless to say, I make a terrible Void Assassin...


Fuck yeah, Dark Heresy. ALL OF THE CRIT TABLES.
As Fion waited for an answer, he watched in interest as the little girl suddenly began to rapidly age until she seemed to be about as old as he was. And then she spoke.

"I am Fion. Who are you?"

Well...he hadn't been expecting that. But would that make this girl some kind of mirror of himself? It seemed to be the only conclusion that made sense. That last time he'd seen her in his dreams, she had both arms, but this time, she was missing her left arm, just as he was missing his right. Damn it, how screwed up were his dreams if he was envisioning a female mirror of himself? There had to be some kind of ridiculous magical explanation for this. It was probably that damned witch's fault, too. Still, he figured he might as well answer.

"Really, now? You know, that's interesting. My name just happens to be Fion too."
Collab up. I'll get the Alicia section up tomorrow.
Lantus emerged from the inn, squinting at the harsh Plegian sun before noticing the more alarming event in front of him: Xanxus had just brained Darrian with a rock. Scowling in disbelief, Lantus resisted the urge to start berating Xanxus for assaulting his liege. If the Exalt had actually been seriously injured by the stone, Lantus wasn't sure if he could keep himself in check and not draw his sword against his fellow general. Xanxus may be friends with Darrian, but Darrian was still the Exalt. While Darrian still lacked an heir, any and all threats to his health were threats to Ylisse's continued stability and prosperity. Only when the Exalt finally had an heir would Lantus be able to breathe easy. Therefore, he steeled his will. With incidents like these and Darrian's love of taking risks, he was left with no choice but to go ahead with his plan, no matter how reluctant he was to actually go through with it.

"My liege." Lantus approached Darrian, bowing his head in deference. "If we could speak in private for a moment? I have information that would most likely interest you."

Darrian rubbed the back of his head, grunting as he felt the swelling of his scalp. Ugh... that had hurt, and he had to admit, he felt a bit sleepy. But now wasn't the time for naps. He glanced up when a man approached, and he quickly recognized him. "Lantus. Good to see you again." he said, crossing his arms. He had a perfect night, drinking with his friends and laying with women. When Lantus continued to speak, his dark brow furrowed. He had information? "Is it about the Shepherds?" he asked, his eyes remaining locked on the man's face. Lantus was a strong general- even though Xanxus told him that he shouldn't trust him, Darrian found that he couldn't sever their friendly ties. "I mean, what else can there be? Has Plegia made a move?"

"Actually, yes." Lantus nodded, motioning for Darrian to follow him back inside the inn. "Reports have confirmed that Prince Laius has left the capital. There's been no confirmation on his whereabouts yet. At this point, I can only make conjectures, but it is probable that he's set out for foreign aid. Most likely either Regna Ferox or Chon'sin, given that Valm is still smarting over the naval incident."

Darrian scowled at the news. Laius left the capital? Great... they should have accompanied Xanxus to the capital when he went. If they did, then both Laius and his father would have been minced meat. Rubbing the ridge of his nose, he closed his eyes and regained his composure. "When we meet the Shepherds, he is the first one I want dead." he told Lantus. "Is there anything else that you wish to tell me?" maybe Lantus had some good news on top of that. If he could bring a smile to his face, then he would be happy. And everyone knew that if they didn't want to be dealing with a brat, it was to make Darrian happy.

The two walked back inside the inn, and Lantus led Darrian into the back room to ensure their privacy. "Yes, there is. Do you remember when I suggested that you marry and sire an heir as soon as possible?"

Darrian followed Lantus, and blinked at his question. Here he goes again with his whole 'sire a heir' bullshit. "Yes, I do recall that. It was when we were playing a game of chess in our tent. You beat me a few times..." he chuckled, trying to keep the conversation light. He really didn't want to be restrained to having a wife and child. "What of it?"

Lantus kept his face stoic, despite inwardly grimacing at what he was about to say. "I would offer my daughter, Selene, as a potential bride." He stated simply and with no emotion. Simply the thought of making this offer had been keeping him up all last night. Despite how much this would benefit his family, Lantus had no desire to have either of his daughters marry this paranoid brute. But Selene had written back to him, and she had agreed to the plan. She knew what was at stake, and she was already a skilled Sage. If nothing else, she could defend herself.

At first, Darrian was shocked at his words. He was offered up Lantus's daughter... Selene was her name. He was pretty sure that he hadn't met her before... and if he did, then he didn't remember. Yet... this seemed suspicious. Was his daughter undesirable to other men and he wanted to dump her on him? "I have to say..." he stroked his chin. "That does sound tempting..." he admitted. "But something seems off. Are you sure that she is fit to be the Queen of Ylisse and to deliver my babe? Because you seem... eager. It's either because you can't find another suitor or you really care more about me than I thought."

Lantus had anticipated Darrian's resistance to the idea, given how much the man enjoyed sleeping around, and so coming up with a compelling argument was easy. "Well, if nothing else, I'll stop pestering you about the idea." He shrugged nonchalantly, while inwardly seething at Darrian's stupidity. Did the man not realize that the only reason Lantus had to offer up his own child was to put one of his own brood on the throne of Ylisse? Not for the first time, he lamented at how Exalt Lucina had evidently failed completely in raising her only child. "But in all seriousness, I could think of no better candidate. Selene has been educated by the finest tutors and trained in the arts of war by myself. A strong bride for a strong Exalt." Lantus said, folding his arms. Now came the crux of his plan. Selene rising to the throne of Ylisse and eventually giving birth to a future Exalt was a major goal behind this, but there was something else equally as important. The old general fell to one knee, bowing before his lord. "However, in exchange for giving my daughter's hand to you, I would request but one boon, Your Majesty."

Darrian did not like this idea. Lantus wanted him to take his daughter, someone that he didn't even know. But... if what Lantus said was true, she wouldn't be one of those useless wives that sat around and gossiped all day. Though this seemed like the last thing that Lantus wanted to tell him, the old man fell to one knee and requested a boon. Darrian raised an eyebrow and looked down at him, the frown he had on his face deepening a bit. "Boon? And what is this boon?" he questioned. He supposed that he could very well have his daughter. It did get rather lonely in the castle and everyone that talked to him became very annoying at times. This would be a new face.

"As you know, my youngest daughter, Alicia, was a Shepherd." Lantus began, desperately hoping that Darrian was at least somewhat reasonable today. "However, she was no traitor to the throne. She was of low rank within the Shepherds and had no involvement with their treachery against you. I beseech you, Your Majesty, to spare her if she is captured. My youngest is of no danger to you or the throne, and I merely want her safe." It galled Lantus to be on his knees, pleading like a dog to a man that he didn't even respect, but for his family, he would do anything. His own pride was worthless compared to the safety of his children.

Darrian looked down at Lantus, scowling as he crossed his arms. He wanted him to spare his daughter? Really? Ugh... he supposed he could. Unless she really annoyed the fuck out of him. With a roll of his eyes, he sighed. "Fine. I'll spare her. But if she raises her blade, I won't hestitate to end her life." if Alicia was a true Ylissean, she would probably switch sides as soon as she saw their true power, anyway.

Lantus very nearly let out a sigh of relief, but stopped himself from doing so. "Thank you, my lord." He said, rising to leave. "I'll begin making the arrangements for the wedding once the Shepards and the Plegians are dead and buried in the ground. There will be no need for you to trouble yourself." As Lantus walked out, he felt the tension in his chest dissipate. Now that he had secured a pardon for Alicia, there would be no further worries for him during this campaign. All that was left was to find Alicia once more and bring her back. With this, he emerged back outside the inn, prepared to lead the army once more.
Oi.

Tob.

At least let us know if you're alive.
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