Maybe this is a sign I should fall asleep after accidentally posting IC in the OOC...
The Irish Tree Member
Hot-Blooded Loser
STATUS: @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins. 6 mos ago
- Last Seen: Online
- Joined: 10 yrs ago
- Posts: 5558 (1.48 / day)
- VMs: 5
-
Username history
- The Irish Tree 10 yrs ago
-
Latest 10 profile visitors:
-
Most recent →
ezio ac2,
Lucid Dreaming,
PaulHaynek,
Cleveraptor,
Izurich,
chicken2024,
Alby47,
oooooo,
RosalineEleanor,
KillamriX88
Status
Recent Statuses
6 mos ago
Current
@SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3
likes
6 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6
likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3
likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.
Bio
No longer an asshole!
Most Recent Posts
Woop, nevermind, misread part of the post!
Shizuka Hoshiguma
As the sun began to set over Shinjuku, a sense of unease overtook Shizuka. She'd been at this Magical Girl business for at least a week now, but it didn't make the shadows coming alive more palatable. Making her way to a rooftop, the girl would spread her arms out, a small flat-screen device coming to life in her pocket.
"All things are aligned: Stars, Planets, Cosmos, Infinity...Come! Magical Starlight Change!"
So she would say, pulling the screen-device out and holding it aloft, a thin beam of light reaching up from it towards the heavens above. In the busy streets of Shinjuku, lit up even at night, this light would be drowned out before the girl who caused it changed, hair taking on the shine of the sun with a sea of stars shining in her eyes. Right now, this ordinary high school girl was becoming someone capable of protecting this city.
Fully transformed into Magical Starlighter, Shizuka would connect her transformation-key-device-thing-a-ma-bob to the satellite that accompanied her Transformation: Big Dipper. With her eye-in-the-sky online, the girl would receive data of the air-to-ground visuals and relay them in the group chat.
[HoshiKuma]: OMW! {accompanied by a sticker of a bear running, and an image graph showing a satellite view of Shinjuku zoomed in to show the three Magical Girls already present for everyone else}
"Boost!" Shizuka would say before the undersides of her soles came alight with blue energy, sending her rocketing into the air before she angled her body to start heading in the direction of Himeko, starting the process to convert the Big Dipper into its cannon state.
@Rune_Alchemist@RolePlayerRoxas@Rin
The girl would arrive overhead, needing to slowly control her thrusters as she landed a distance behind the others, unceremoniously landing on her behind before getting up. "Ow, ow ow...S-Starlighter, here to provide backup!" she would say, just as her arm's state shifted, a large futuristic cannon forming on it, with her hand sheathed inside to hold the "handle" from within. Though admittedly, it looked like the situation was well-in-hand with three Magical Girls already here. ...Still, that wasn't going to stop her from raising her cannon, prepared to sneak a few shots in on the Shade from the air if they did need her help.
Well, that was comforting. At least they'd only die from a vague threat of stranding them in time if they turned traitor. Conveniently mentioned after authority was questioned. Right now, Elise was really glad she hadn't taken a swig of her horn in front of Orson, since he seemed like a huge stickler for policy, and Archimedes was enough of a stick in the mud that he saw zero issue with that.
...She'd treat herself and Bunbuku once they got back, hoping they wouldn't have to fight Team A. They were cream of the crop with top-line Servants, so that was pretty much a death sentence. With the Rayshift nausea passing in time, Elise would shake her head and take in her surroundings. "Quaint," she commented, looking out a window beside Conner. "If its low-level bone soldiers without their controller nearby, that probably means we're looking at a proficient enough mage to send them out in droves without needing to control them," she commented.
Bunbuku Chaguma, do you think you can erect a bounded field? Even a basic alarm or barrier can do. Unless you'd rather go out and crack some skulls," Elise offered, smiling at her Servant.
...So that was how he would play it then? Some part of Celtchar was thinking this whole mission seemed like too much of a hassle with the zero information Chaldea had. Was Team A dead or alive? Were their vitals being faked? What could have beaten top-class Servants? None of that really mattered though with the vague threat to Team B meaning his Master's life was on the line. So for now, he'd obey without question. Leaning a hand on his Master's shoulder, he'd whisper: "It'll be okay. Just trust me. If you can't trust anything else, trust your weapon. If you can't trust authority, trust the mission. If you can't trust yourself, trust your instincts And if your instincts are screaming that you're in danger..." He would thrust a thumb at his chest, saying: "Call my name and I'll come running. That's why its great that you've got it memorized now."
To a Servant, the rayshift process was no different than materializing, with the Master as their anchor. Right away a plan was formed to have Frankenstein scout around the grounds which-
"...Wait, we're having the Berserker scout? I mean, as long as its just the estate but..." Celtchar audibly questioned, before shaking his head. "Alright, that aside, if a Mage is cowering somewhere and licking their wounds, its gotta be somewhere they can set up a workshop. Master, Team Leader, I could scout further out. Try and sense magic in remote locations. For now though..." Celtchar would beam, drawing his lance from his back, still in its sheathe. "If there's a Servant in the newspaper, that's already pretty bad. Master, Leader, want me to go out and see what the deal is?"
...She'd treat herself and Bunbuku once they got back, hoping they wouldn't have to fight Team A. They were cream of the crop with top-line Servants, so that was pretty much a death sentence. With the Rayshift nausea passing in time, Elise would shake her head and take in her surroundings. "Quaint," she commented, looking out a window beside Conner. "If its low-level bone soldiers without their controller nearby, that probably means we're looking at a proficient enough mage to send them out in droves without needing to control them," she commented.
Bunbuku Chaguma, do you think you can erect a bounded field? Even a basic alarm or barrier can do. Unless you'd rather go out and crack some skulls," Elise offered, smiling at her Servant.
...So that was how he would play it then? Some part of Celtchar was thinking this whole mission seemed like too much of a hassle with the zero information Chaldea had. Was Team A dead or alive? Were their vitals being faked? What could have beaten top-class Servants? None of that really mattered though with the vague threat to Team B meaning his Master's life was on the line. So for now, he'd obey without question. Leaning a hand on his Master's shoulder, he'd whisper: "It'll be okay. Just trust me. If you can't trust anything else, trust your weapon. If you can't trust authority, trust the mission. If you can't trust yourself, trust your instincts And if your instincts are screaming that you're in danger..." He would thrust a thumb at his chest, saying: "Call my name and I'll come running. That's why its great that you've got it memorized now."
To a Servant, the rayshift process was no different than materializing, with the Master as their anchor. Right away a plan was formed to have Frankenstein scout around the grounds which-
"...Wait, we're having the Berserker scout? I mean, as long as its just the estate but..." Celtchar audibly questioned, before shaking his head. "Alright, that aside, if a Mage is cowering somewhere and licking their wounds, its gotta be somewhere they can set up a workshop. Master, Team Leader, I could scout further out. Try and sense magic in remote locations. For now though..." Celtchar would beam, drawing his lance from his back, still in its sheathe. "If there's a Servant in the newspaper, that's already pretty bad. Master, Leader, want me to go out and see what the deal is?"
Finished our collabs and posted! Sorry for the wait.
In the span of time that Mordred would be surprised by Bunbuku’s existence, Elise would already be working on getting to know her Servant as best she was able, examining her status in detail through their magic circuit connection. "You’re surprisingly tough for a Caster…and your luck is through the roof," she noted.
"I’m just that damn awesome," Bunbuku says, clicking her kiseru’s flint with a smirk. "Bestower of Eight Virtue, I can even dodge Gae Bolg and Zabaniya. That’s just how hype I am. You can bow, or kneel. Doesn’t matter."
"Got it, but let’s hope you don’t go up against stuff like that to begin with," Elise said, not stopping as she took notes and took a knee, asking: "So how do you fight exactly? Scalding hot water thrown via magecraft? Physical attacks delivered via your Mana Burst skills?"
"This pipe. This gourd. And, deez nuts," Bunbuku smirked.
Elise visibly cringed at that last statement.
"Oh, c’mon, Master, smile a little - a lot - and often," Bunbuku says, pulling Elise’s cheeks up.
Elise sighed as her cheeks were tugged. "I guess. Either way, you seem dependable enough, even if you’re about as serious as a clown in a pie factory."
"Pie? Lame," Bunbuku says. "Dependability is a two-way, though, Master, so you better hold up your end of the highway."
"Y’know what, that’s fair," Elise said, getting up. "As a magus, my expertise is in potion-making. I may not have a lot of directly useful spells in combat, but I do have non-toxic potions that should work even on a Servant. Healing, Mana Infusion, Strengthening…I even have a poison that drives enemies a little insane." Putting a hand into the pouch hanging off her side with her drinking horn attached, she would pull out small ampoule bottles, marked and colored. "I also make the best wine you’ll ever drink, so at some point, I’ll age some sake for us to party with."
"Oh, that sounds like it would make for a wonderful sweetener," Bunbuku says.
"I know, right!?" Elise said, glad SOMEONE appreciated good drinks around here.
Afterwards, Elise would inform Leon of their readiness.
"I’m just that damn awesome," Bunbuku says, clicking her kiseru’s flint with a smirk. "Bestower of Eight Virtue, I can even dodge Gae Bolg and Zabaniya. That’s just how hype I am. You can bow, or kneel. Doesn’t matter."
"Got it, but let’s hope you don’t go up against stuff like that to begin with," Elise said, not stopping as she took notes and took a knee, asking: "So how do you fight exactly? Scalding hot water thrown via magecraft? Physical attacks delivered via your Mana Burst skills?"
"This pipe. This gourd. And, deez nuts," Bunbuku smirked.
Elise visibly cringed at that last statement.
"Oh, c’mon, Master, smile a little - a lot - and often," Bunbuku says, pulling Elise’s cheeks up.
Elise sighed as her cheeks were tugged. "I guess. Either way, you seem dependable enough, even if you’re about as serious as a clown in a pie factory."
"Pie? Lame," Bunbuku says. "Dependability is a two-way, though, Master, so you better hold up your end of the highway."
"Y’know what, that’s fair," Elise said, getting up. "As a magus, my expertise is in potion-making. I may not have a lot of directly useful spells in combat, but I do have non-toxic potions that should work even on a Servant. Healing, Mana Infusion, Strengthening…I even have a poison that drives enemies a little insane." Putting a hand into the pouch hanging off her side with her drinking horn attached, she would pull out small ampoule bottles, marked and colored. "I also make the best wine you’ll ever drink, so at some point, I’ll age some sake for us to party with."
"Oh, that sounds like it would make for a wonderful sweetener," Bunbuku says.
"I know, right!?" Elise said, glad SOMEONE appreciated good drinks around here.
Afterwards, Elise would inform Leon of their readiness.
While she was walking around, Alice did genuinely consider marketing her potions. While she knew they were in necessary supply for adventurers, she'd have to check if there was any law prohibiting the selling of certain alchemical substances. After all, magic and alchemy weren't accepted everywhere, and she didn't want to get arrest for "drug-dealing" common level healing potions. ...Still...she'd definitely not call it a cherry pop.
Sofia meanwhile was growing more irate, not at Brandy for incessantly dragging her to all these stores and getting them kicked out before even getting a word in edge-wise, but because of the craftsmanship on display before her. With a harumph and shoulder bump as she went past the snooty clerk and snatched the hairband out of his hand to examine it.
I say miss, give that back! You and your friend are-"
"Leaving. Yes, we are, because your craftsmanship as boorish as your manners you pompous windbag of a salesman," Sofia said, a hand on her hip as she held the hairband aloft. "You're charging four digits for a hairband that needed this many corrective sews put into the inner-layer? This thing's fatter than your mother in law," Sofia said dismissively, dropping it onto the counter. "Let's go Brandy. I've had enough charlatans and swindlers trying to sell me their tasteless goods for one day. I've decided. If no one can sell me a choker, I'll make it myself!"
Storming out and yanking Brandy by the hand like an irate mother would to an uncooperative child, Sofia would take them from the finest clothing store in town to the general store and purchase a thin sheet of black cloth, less than a tenth of the price of what the 'Golden Needle' was peddling. "Now, witness my supreme sewing skill!" she said, taking Brandy behind the store and producing a toolbox-looking kit from her satchel and working faster than Brandy could track, making enough flourishes that it looked like she was fighting with a sword, dueling with the cloth itself before proudly holding up a choker that, as far as Brandy could tell, was of such quality make that it looked 'Golden Needle' quality. "Sad to see that in this day and age good sewing is a dying art. I bet its because they use magic to automate the process. However!" Sofia would boop Brandy's nose and smile. "Now, for getting me fired up, I'm afraid you'll have to be my muse. You wanted a hairband, yes?" she said, suddenly presenting one that she'd made from the same bolt of cloth. It was black as night, but would serve as good contrast to Brandy's hair and would hardly feel like it was there with Sofia's craftsmanship.
"Heh! She's certain to think I'm useful now. ...Wait...but what if she just thinks I'm some dead housewife PRETENDING to be an adventurer?" Sofia thought, starting to panic a little. She couldn't have anybody learning her dark secret that she learned how to sew so well solely to be a good housewife.
Sofia meanwhile was growing more irate, not at Brandy for incessantly dragging her to all these stores and getting them kicked out before even getting a word in edge-wise, but because of the craftsmanship on display before her. With a harumph and shoulder bump as she went past the snooty clerk and snatched the hairband out of his hand to examine it.
I say miss, give that back! You and your friend are-"
"Leaving. Yes, we are, because your craftsmanship as boorish as your manners you pompous windbag of a salesman," Sofia said, a hand on her hip as she held the hairband aloft. "You're charging four digits for a hairband that needed this many corrective sews put into the inner-layer? This thing's fatter than your mother in law," Sofia said dismissively, dropping it onto the counter. "Let's go Brandy. I've had enough charlatans and swindlers trying to sell me their tasteless goods for one day. I've decided. If no one can sell me a choker, I'll make it myself!"
Storming out and yanking Brandy by the hand like an irate mother would to an uncooperative child, Sofia would take them from the finest clothing store in town to the general store and purchase a thin sheet of black cloth, less than a tenth of the price of what the 'Golden Needle' was peddling. "Now, witness my supreme sewing skill!" she said, taking Brandy behind the store and producing a toolbox-looking kit from her satchel and working faster than Brandy could track, making enough flourishes that it looked like she was fighting with a sword, dueling with the cloth itself before proudly holding up a choker that, as far as Brandy could tell, was of such quality make that it looked 'Golden Needle' quality. "Sad to see that in this day and age good sewing is a dying art. I bet its because they use magic to automate the process. However!" Sofia would boop Brandy's nose and smile. "Now, for getting me fired up, I'm afraid you'll have to be my muse. You wanted a hairband, yes?" she said, suddenly presenting one that she'd made from the same bolt of cloth. It was black as night, but would serve as good contrast to Brandy's hair and would hardly feel like it was there with Sofia's craftsmanship.
"Heh! She's certain to think I'm useful now. ...Wait...but what if she just thinks I'm some dead housewife PRETENDING to be an adventurer?" Sofia thought, starting to panic a little. She couldn't have anybody learning her dark secret that she learned how to sew so well solely to be a good housewife.
NO ONE COULD KNOW! NOT EVEN YOU, DEAR READER!
We'll be getting a collab done within a few days for our Servant interactions. Apologies for the wait, Enk's work has been hectic and I'm studying for an upcoming exam.
"I see...thanks Archimedes. I'm struggling to find a common weakness they might have, but maybe its one of those things where a stronger Servant is more likely to lose to this particular problem. I was thinking military experience was a common point, but Helena isn't exactly a general or anything."
"Last one's me. C'mon, A-Grade..." Elise would say under her breath, clenching her right hand and holding it out.
"Let silver and steel be the essence..." she would say, her Magic Circuits coming alight as she recited the same oath as everyone else, the incantation to summon her Servant.
"An oath shall be sworn here..." Now, was the appointed time. The proper place. The vessel of power would descend and manifest, Elise's guardian against the dangers of the past, and the necessary tool to protect the future.
"From the highest Heaven, and from the deepest hell attended to by three great words of power, come forth from the ring of restraint, protector of the holy balance!" The spell would complete in full, the incantation causing the summoning circle to alight with the power induced by the Third Magic, the Throne answering Elise's summons and bringing forth her Servant.
As Elise finished her rendition of the oath, and the blinding lights of heroism died out, she would be left with no Servant of Yore, no valiant hero of days gone, of stories told, and legends made. No. All she would be left with was a dingy, old tea kettle that was puffing steam from a nonexistent flame.
Oh, and it was musical, too, as the steam whistled an oddly familiar, but pitch shifted (gotta avoid that copyright strike) tune that any child of the right generation knew by heart.
Elise would stare in the most point-blank, undeniable confusion as she looked around, seeing that the other summons had succeeded. She checked her shoulder as it felt like it was on fire, seeing the command spells forming on it and…a tea kettle.
She’d summoned a tea kettle.
Going over, she would carefully grab the handle of it, seeing as there was absolutely no way she hadn’t passed out and was hallucinating right now. After all, there was no way a mage of her caliber failed a summoning ritual.
And she was definitely not on the verge of a panic attack at the thought of going into battle against Servants throwing hot tea at them.
"Ara ara~! I know I'm hot, but you never grab a lady by her tail, you know!"
"...Hey, Conner, can you just like, slap me across the face so I know I’m not dreaming? The tea kettle is talking…" she said, looking very tired already.
"You don't need that twerp to do what I can do!" Elise would suddenly eat a faceful of scaldingly cold water. Like, a bucket of ice on her face.
Elise would fall on her back, releasing the tea kettle as she was splashed, shaking her face in surprise. "W-Wait, if you can talk and you’re an object…are you some sort of Yōkai Servant?"
"Is there a chicken around, because someone just won herself a dinner!" Suddenly, very long, shapely legs popped out of the hind of the kettle, while slender, graceful arms popped out the front, and an attractive, in a rather matronly way, woman popped her head out of the mouth of the belly - wearing the kettle lid on her head like a hat. "Yo dayo!"
A long pause would be Elise’s answer, before she slumped on her back, smiling. "Okay, for a second there, you got me. So, you’re a Servant that can shapeshift…or, no. Perhaps that tea kettle is your true form, and this body is the one you shapeshift into…" Elise would stand, before walking around her Servant. "...Caster? Would you reveal your True Name to me?"
Smirking, the woman would, all too suddenly, explode into the air, and grow to several times her size. "My name?! My name!?" she asks, as a giant half-kettle, half-woman parts - doing her best to sexily pose - before sucked her ladu pieces in the metal kettle the size of half the room. "Honey! You can call me many things! Attractive! Sexy! Stylish! Rogue! Earl Grey, and Debonair!" she says, before kicking a door our of the side of the kettle like it was a house, "Boom, baby! You're standing before the Empress of Tea, the Savior of Simping Priests, the Thousand Cups Princess, herself!" The woman coyly hid behind her giant as hell, fluffy as fuck raccoon tail, as she boasted, "Casters wanna be me! Masters wanna see me! Everyone loves me! The one and only, Tea Kettle Servant! Bunbuku Chagama, at your service!"
"And, lemme tell ya, you ain't never had a Servant like me!" Bunbuku winked.
"If you start singing copyrighted material I will use a command spell to stop you," Elise warned, before smiling. "Gotta admit though…I’m curious what you can do in a fight."
"Oh, the usual Tea Kettle stuff. Set stuff on fire. Blow things up. Set blown up things on fire. Set a tidal wave of sake on fire. End world thirst, or flood the planet. You know, basic first grade magic class stuff," Bunbuku says, casually puffing on her kiseru.
That all definitely did not sound like usual Tea Kettle stuff.
But, Elise would judge that as being sufficient. A Caster-class Servant was low on mana consumption, so she was glad this one seemed to be on the more offensive side of things. "You make sake too?"
"Tea is the speciality of a Tea Kettle, but one as magnificent as myself, I'm not behold to one specialty, and fermented tea leaves will afford you alcohol all the same," Bunbuku says.
"Though, I've no revelations in making it, if you intend to ask. Unless you wanna talk about tea sake!"
Elise would clasp her hands together and beam. "Oh, don’t worry about that part. I think you and I are gonna get along juuuust fine," she would say, before going over and patting Bunbuku on the shoulder.
"But, of course! Everyone gets along with Tea Kettles," Bunbuku says, puffing her kiseru; the smoke smelled strong as hell of Earl Grey, with its distinctly black pepper smell.
Despite summoning what to most was a decidedly weak Servant, her legend stemming from a tea kettle, Elise had a feeling her compatibility with Bunbuku Chaguma would mean they’d work swimmingly well together. "Sip of absinthe?" Elise offered, holding up the drinking horn she’d had on her hip the whole time.
"Needs a bit more age," Bunbuku says, drawing the horn to her lips, and blowing smoke into the belly of it. Elise could feel the magic of the old, the era of Japan where it was at its apex of magic, before it dissipated like steam. "Try that."
"Oh, I trust that its perfect now. Just, a bit on the job. I figured its okay for a Servant to have a sip, but the Director might kill me if I’m drinking on the job. Off the job however? I’ll have to see how much a tea kettle can drink." Elise smirked, confident she could drink her Servant under the table.
"Last one's me. C'mon, A-Grade..." Elise would say under her breath, clenching her right hand and holding it out.
"Let silver and steel be the essence..." she would say, her Magic Circuits coming alight as she recited the same oath as everyone else, the incantation to summon her Servant.
"An oath shall be sworn here..." Now, was the appointed time. The proper place. The vessel of power would descend and manifest, Elise's guardian against the dangers of the past, and the necessary tool to protect the future.
"From the highest Heaven, and from the deepest hell attended to by three great words of power, come forth from the ring of restraint, protector of the holy balance!" The spell would complete in full, the incantation causing the summoning circle to alight with the power induced by the Third Magic, the Throne answering Elise's summons and bringing forth her Servant.
As Elise finished her rendition of the oath, and the blinding lights of heroism died out, she would be left with no Servant of Yore, no valiant hero of days gone, of stories told, and legends made. No. All she would be left with was a dingy, old tea kettle that was puffing steam from a nonexistent flame.
Oh, and it was musical, too, as the steam whistled an oddly familiar, but pitch shifted (gotta avoid that copyright strike) tune that any child of the right generation knew by heart.
Elise would stare in the most point-blank, undeniable confusion as she looked around, seeing that the other summons had succeeded. She checked her shoulder as it felt like it was on fire, seeing the command spells forming on it and…a tea kettle.
She’d summoned a tea kettle.
Going over, she would carefully grab the handle of it, seeing as there was absolutely no way she hadn’t passed out and was hallucinating right now. After all, there was no way a mage of her caliber failed a summoning ritual.
And she was definitely not on the verge of a panic attack at the thought of going into battle against Servants throwing hot tea at them.
"Ara ara~! I know I'm hot, but you never grab a lady by her tail, you know!"
"...Hey, Conner, can you just like, slap me across the face so I know I’m not dreaming? The tea kettle is talking…" she said, looking very tired already.
"You don't need that twerp to do what I can do!" Elise would suddenly eat a faceful of scaldingly cold water. Like, a bucket of ice on her face.
Elise would fall on her back, releasing the tea kettle as she was splashed, shaking her face in surprise. "W-Wait, if you can talk and you’re an object…are you some sort of Yōkai Servant?"
"Is there a chicken around, because someone just won herself a dinner!" Suddenly, very long, shapely legs popped out of the hind of the kettle, while slender, graceful arms popped out the front, and an attractive, in a rather matronly way, woman popped her head out of the mouth of the belly - wearing the kettle lid on her head like a hat. "Yo dayo!"
A long pause would be Elise’s answer, before she slumped on her back, smiling. "Okay, for a second there, you got me. So, you’re a Servant that can shapeshift…or, no. Perhaps that tea kettle is your true form, and this body is the one you shapeshift into…" Elise would stand, before walking around her Servant. "...Caster? Would you reveal your True Name to me?"
Smirking, the woman would, all too suddenly, explode into the air, and grow to several times her size. "My name?! My name!?" she asks, as a giant half-kettle, half-woman parts - doing her best to sexily pose - before sucked her ladu pieces in the metal kettle the size of half the room. "Honey! You can call me many things! Attractive! Sexy! Stylish! Rogue! Earl Grey, and Debonair!" she says, before kicking a door our of the side of the kettle like it was a house, "Boom, baby! You're standing before the Empress of Tea, the Savior of Simping Priests, the Thousand Cups Princess, herself!" The woman coyly hid behind her giant as hell, fluffy as fuck raccoon tail, as she boasted, "Casters wanna be me! Masters wanna see me! Everyone loves me! The one and only, Tea Kettle Servant! Bunbuku Chagama, at your service!"
"And, lemme tell ya, you ain't never had a Servant like me!" Bunbuku winked.
"If you start singing copyrighted material I will use a command spell to stop you," Elise warned, before smiling. "Gotta admit though…I’m curious what you can do in a fight."
"Oh, the usual Tea Kettle stuff. Set stuff on fire. Blow things up. Set blown up things on fire. Set a tidal wave of sake on fire. End world thirst, or flood the planet. You know, basic first grade magic class stuff," Bunbuku says, casually puffing on her kiseru.
That all definitely did not sound like usual Tea Kettle stuff.
But, Elise would judge that as being sufficient. A Caster-class Servant was low on mana consumption, so she was glad this one seemed to be on the more offensive side of things. "You make sake too?"
"Tea is the speciality of a Tea Kettle, but one as magnificent as myself, I'm not behold to one specialty, and fermented tea leaves will afford you alcohol all the same," Bunbuku says.
"Though, I've no revelations in making it, if you intend to ask. Unless you wanna talk about tea sake!"
Elise would clasp her hands together and beam. "Oh, don’t worry about that part. I think you and I are gonna get along juuuust fine," she would say, before going over and patting Bunbuku on the shoulder.
"But, of course! Everyone gets along with Tea Kettles," Bunbuku says, puffing her kiseru; the smoke smelled strong as hell of Earl Grey, with its distinctly black pepper smell.
Despite summoning what to most was a decidedly weak Servant, her legend stemming from a tea kettle, Elise had a feeling her compatibility with Bunbuku Chaguma would mean they’d work swimmingly well together. "Sip of absinthe?" Elise offered, holding up the drinking horn she’d had on her hip the whole time.
"Needs a bit more age," Bunbuku says, drawing the horn to her lips, and blowing smoke into the belly of it. Elise could feel the magic of the old, the era of Japan where it was at its apex of magic, before it dissipated like steam. "Try that."
"Oh, I trust that its perfect now. Just, a bit on the job. I figured its okay for a Servant to have a sip, but the Director might kill me if I’m drinking on the job. Off the job however? I’ll have to see how much a tea kettle can drink." Elise smirked, confident she could drink her Servant under the table.
Bunbuku Chagama's lips tugged into a tiny smirk, 'What a fun friend I have... Nine-hundred-ninety-nine to go...' before she beamed, "To unhealthy choices, and, uh, saving the world, I guess!"
© 2007-2024