Avatar of Duoya

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Recent Statuses

27 days ago
Current I sound like a broken record, but only 2 months left till I'm done teaching. Not sure what's next, but it feels like anything would pay more and be less stressful lol
5 likes
4 mos ago
Only 6 more months till the school years over. If I renew my contract, someone kill me lmao.
3 likes
1 yr ago
Teacher update: I feel like a villain from a cartoon. The laughter of teenagers gives me migraines, and I no longer feel guilt when giving bad grades to kids that sleep through my lessons.
10 likes
1 yr ago
First day as a Biology Teacher tomorrow - hopefully the kids will be able to read my handwriting.
10 likes
1 yr ago
Oh boy, Thanksgiving - my second favorite holiday! Only one I like more is Cheapass Halloween, the day after regular halloween when all the candy is half off
11 likes

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Most Recent Posts

"One hour. That's how long I've been gone and you already burnt something down Master, that's a new record,"

Charlotte stopped in her tracks as she was making her way to the canteen, and she barely made it a few steps out of the training room. She recognized the voice and turned to meet her new Servant.

"Maybe I should get one of those 'fire extinguishers' for my stay as your Servant. What do you think, Master?"

"Like a pail of water? That's rude of you, to assume such a thing could stop my Burning Soul!"

Charlotte chuckled a little too loudly for comfort at her own statement, before nodding her head to herself.

"And I would think you'd be appreciative that I withheld myself for an entire hour. The last time I remember doing that was on the plane ride here, and that was awful..."

She stopped as she listened to the new discussion underway between her Servant and Daniel. While she didn't really care for the morality behind becoming a 'Magus Killer,' especially considering her willingness to be a regular killer, she never really considered the Church or the Clock Tower to be especially corrupt. She even visited it one time with her family, and while she refused to take classes, the Clock Tower itself seemed like a very respectable foundation... If a bit elitist.

Well, a bit was pretty generous, considering some of the things she saw in her very brief visit.

Charlotte knocked herself out of her trance when she heard her name being spoken, specifically focusing back in when Daniel complimented her. She smugly nodded at the recognition of her skills. She didn't really understand the part about timelines, even when members of Chaldea Staff explained it to her in detail, but she didn't really mind ignorance unless it would become an issue later on.

"There you have it, Lancer! And I would call what I do to my room 'making it homey' rather than 'making a mess.' Anyways, I'm going to the Canteen to get some food, and maybe look for Caster afterward - you guys are welcome to follow if you want. Just be sure not to babysit too much if you come, Lancer."




Lots of things happen when you ran especially fast. You get lightheaded after sprinted long enough, your blood sugar drops, and your body feels like it's on fire. This, combined with the dozens of other minor effects from exertion and fatigue lead to people being a bit less perceptive than usual.

Chad was running far from his maximum speed, and he felt none of these symptoms. He'd definitely lie and say he did if ever questioned about what was going to happen, however.

As he neared Savior Island, barely saw the figure of a person in front of him appear before he collided with them. Chad was immediately hit with a sense of unease since he just slammed into what he thought was a person at just under 100 miles per hour, but this was washed away with pain as he was forced back from the collision. Chad was initially very perplexed why he felt so much pain - he ran into brick walls at the speeds he was running with little more than bruises and aches, but this felt like getting hit by a 250 lb Tackle.

To Chad's credit, he didn't fall from the crash - he was only pushed back a few feet and left staggered, thanks to his temporary durability and padded armor.

"Oh shit... Are you oka-"

It was easy to tell Chad's surprise when he noticed who he ran into, even when Chad was wearing a helmet. His arms shot in the air as he screamed loudly.

"OH MY GOD, ARE YOU HUGO POWERS?! Do you have any Invincible Warmonger posters I can-"

Chad might have been able to dodge the blow if he hadn't been distracted, but he wasn't as blessed as other Speedsters when it came to reaction time. Powers slapped Chad with incredible force, and while the helmet may have absorbed some of the blow, Chad didn't have any of his temporary durability to protect himself. He collapsed to the ground on his stomach and reeled for several seconds as Powers spoke.

"You have ten seconds to tell me your name, occupation, and why the hell you're here, or else I put you in a cell with the meanest bastard in all of Coldwater. So if that idea doesn't sound appealing to you, start talking."

"I'm sorry, I don't need the poster, please don't shoot-"

It took a second to fully process that Powers didn't have a gun, and understand what he was saying before Chad instantly relented.

"I'm Chad Connors, Pizza Delivery Man at Porter's Pizza. I want to be a super cool badass Hero, a-and I thought you came to H.E.R.O to be a Hero cause it sounds cooler than I.C.O.S.A. P-p-please don't put me into Coldwater, The C-chainsaw Charlatan will kill me for throwing him in prison!"

Chad might have been slightly concussed from the collision, or too frightened by the prospect of prison to think clearly, or maybe he just talked when he was under stress. Whatever the reason, he kept on talking when he clearly should have been silent.

"My Boss is Percy P-porter, and my hours are 10 to 7. My favorite food is P-pizza, even though I eat a ton of it since I work at a Pizza p-place. My blog is The Bullet Chamber and it's super c-cool, and I don't want to go to prison!!! I-I think my Social Security is 318-"

Chad paused as he struggled to remember his Social Security number, before eventually giving up.

"I think it's on my phone... C-can I please get up? My suit is really hard to clean..."




...Chainsaw Charlatan was a dangerous opponent, with all the destructive power of a Chainsaw and none of the fuel requirements. With a swipe of his hands, he could slice clean through 5 men, and that wasn't even counting the power of his WEAKEST LINK form. A mighty foe the likes of which was unseen in the entirety of the American Northeast for... well, at least a week. Probably. Of course, a man who had the roaring fury of a Chainsaw would turn to crime - unfortunately for him, there was someone ready to stop his Mutilation Menagerie before it even began!

"Hahaha, FOOLS! You think your puny firearms can stop the might of my TWO-STROKE ENGINE!?"

The gloating form of The Chainsaw Charlatan was easily twice that of a normal man, but it may have been hard to tell since he was doubled over with laughter. He wasn't laughing long, however, before the sound of a sonic boom ripped through the afternoon air - along with the arrival of a warrior in black. The nearby police cheered at the arrival of their Hero.

"Look! It's The Bullet! We're saved!"

"Hey, It's THE BULLET! You have to shout it, it's written out in all caps... Your reign of terror ends here, Chainsaw Caper!"

"Oh really, Bullet? I doubt that - How can your pathetic Super Speed stop me, when I can simply saw your Super Legs off! MUAHAHAHA!"

The Chainsaws that adorned the Charlatan's arms appeared to double in length as he entered his UNDERCUTTING mode. He swung his right arm into the earth below him, and moved it up and towards The Bullet's legs with a speed that should have been inhuman, even without considering the hundreds of pounds of earth that came between the blades and their victim. They came out of the ground at a blinding pace, and the sun still reflected off of their dirtied teeth as the Chainsaw was held in the air.

Dirt was the only thing covering the Chainsaws, however. In the instant the Chainsaw Charlatan began his attack, The Bullet had already devised a genius counterattack. When the Charlatan began attacking, The Bullet ran up to him - and with blinding speed, he yelled out his signature attack.

"It's time to Eat Lead, Chainsaw Charlatan! Special Shot: 9 Millimeter!"

And in an instant, the fight was over. The blow connected solidly with the Charlatan's chin, and he fell to the ground lifelessly. (HE WAS VERY MUCH ALIVE, JUST UNCONSCIOUS!!! PLEASE STLP LEAVING COMMENTS ABOUT THAT, THE BULLET DOESN'T KILL!!!)

One of the officers thanked The Bullet as the others struggled to find a way to handcuff a man with chainsaws for arms.

"We would have been goners without you and your hot lead of justice, Bulle- I mean, THE BULLET!"

"It was my pleasure, Officer. There's always a BULLET in the chamber for evil-doers! Now that my deed is done, I must continue on my neverending quest for Justice - Goodbye, and continue your good work!"

The Bullet ran off from the scene, leaving a smile on all those he passed. With the Chainsaw Charlatan behind the bars of Coldwater, people could sleep soundly knowing their lives wouldn't end with the roar of a toothed-blade and an engine thirsting for blood. Crime never stops, but with The Bullet around, it would also never be able to rest.

THE END




Chad smugly hit the submit button on the prompt he had spent the last few hours writing. Ever since gaining his powers, he had started writing a blog on his future exploits, eager to spread the word of his superhero identity before he even began. He tried not to let it go to his head, but... I mean, 126 VIEWS EVER was pretty impressive, if he said so himself. There were, of course, detractors who sought to cause a bit of ruckus in the comments, but Chad was a very patient man and quickly eased their complaints with logical rebuttals.

And if that didn't work, he could just ignore them.

Unfortunately, Chad didn't have time to wait for the 2-3 comments that would flood in over the next 12 hours - He needed to get to work 15 minutes ago! He quickly shut off his laptop and ran to his doorway, from which his uniform hung. Chad thought it was a bit more stylish than most fast food uniforms, especially the crossed P's that looked like Pizza Peels that served as an emblem. He changed into the red shirt, khakis, and hat in less than 5 seconds, and left his room at a normal jogging pace. Percy was standing at the register, a job that Chad usually performed unless there was a delivery that needed to be made. The older man frowned when he saw Chad jog up to him.

"Jesus, took you long enough. I've been standing at this register for what, half an hour? Even if this is a part-time thing, you need to take me seriously as your boss."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Porter. I was working on something really important."

"Whatever, you're here now. You know, for a Running Back you sure move slow when you want to..."

Chad froze at the words. Running Back. He hadn't played football ever since he got his powers - ever since his parents started to hate him. He hadn't even touched a football since his mother-

Chad's breath came out in fast, ragged-sounding croaks. Percy quickly noticed the sudden shift in demeanor and brought the younger man into a tight hug.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. It's alright, relax. I'm sorry about that - I forgot for a second, that's all... Tell you what, take your mind off of it and get to work, okay big guy?"

Percy clapped Chad's shoulder and broke off the hug. Chad did feel a lot better after that physical contact, even if it was brief - he hadn't touched someone in months.

"Thanks, Coach."

Percy paused slightly but continued to the Manager's office. Chad turned his attention to the uncomfortable and slightly confused customer, welcoming them with the standard company greeting that oozed with the faux-optimism he had grown so accustomed to displaying.

"Welcome to Porter's Pizza, home of the 'Heavy-lifting' Watervale-Style Pizza. How may I take your order?"




"...and the flower was DEAD! Can you believe that? That lady at the store said they were easy to take care of, but even when my daughter watered it every day, it still ended up dying! My little girl was crying so much, I just had to get her favorite pizza to make it up to her. Oh sorry, was I talking too much again? My husband always says I do that!"

A small line of impatient customers had formed up behind the droning woman, but Chad had barely noticed. He was too busy focusing on her story. He had learned at a young age that listening to everything a person says was very important to make them listen to your own opinions, and Chad found listening to be much easier than arguing.

"Oh not at all. Trust me, I understand how confusing those florists can be with instructions. I once got a 'low-maintenance' Cactus when I was a kid, and they died on me constantly! Wasn't until I got 'Lenny XIV: Bamboo Blaster' that I finally stoped getting new plants. Not even mentioning the dog-"

"Yes yes, dear - I'm on a bit of a schedule, however, so can you give me my order?"

"Oh, of course, Mrs. Jackson! You wanted a 'Mini-Porter' Combo, with an additional order of 'Carrier-sized' Chicken Wings - plus 3 orders of 'Heavy-Lifting' Watervale Style Pizza. Is that all?"

"Yes, that's right! You're a better listener than my husband, dear!"

"Alright your total is-"

Suddenly, Chad was pulled away from the register by two small arms, and Percy's familiar voice rang out from behind him.

"Jimmy, Chad is going on his lunch break, take the register please!"

The next thing Chad knew, he was sitting in the Manager's office, with Percy pacing behind his desk.

"Chad, great work with Mrs. Jackson - she's one of our best clients. As, uh, a show of appreciation for you toughing out her monologue, you can take the rest of the day off. Congrats."

Chad paused. Percy was relaxed when it came to taking time off and moving schedules around, but he never offered free time unless he got into one of his moods like this. Chad chose to spoke very carefully, afraid to set off his boss like he did that one time...

"Um, are you sure about that, sir? I don't mind dealing with Mrs. Jackson, she's a nice lady when you get to kno-"

"YES, Chad! I'm sure. Look, everybody needs to be out by 12:30, and while you get us good reviews, you're slow as hell at the register. Just... Take the day off, okay? And get back home a bit later than usual."

Chad stayed silent as he rose from his seat and left the room. He likes the free time, and he especially likes the free time. He just didn't like the feeling it left in his gut when Percy started acting like this...




Chad liked running. When you were running, everything melts away except the ground beneath your feet and the wind flying past you.

When you stayed still, you were unoccupied. When you didn't move, all you could do was think. Think about everything you once had, the feeling of resentment mixed with shame when you saw people you thought cared about you walking down the streets without a worry in the world. The fact that you couldn't play a game you dedicated your life to because it reminded you of things you didn't want to remember. When you were forced to think, you were forced to reflect on every choice you made, and wonder how you could have done better if you had a second chance.

Chad didn't like thinking. He liked Running. Even more than Running, though, Chad liked Acting.

Chad had spent countless hours laying in his bed, tossing over how to properly contact H.E.R.O about his addition to their ranks. He thought about emailing them, purposefully getting rescued by one of the members, and even using his Super Speed to contact Starbright backstage after a concert (as well as get an autograph or seven). But no matter how much he thought it over, he could never find the proper plan of action, always second-guessing himself and finding flaws and holes in his plans he so carefully built up.

That was his problem. Chad thought too much. That's why THE BULLET needs to act.

That's why, currently, Chad was racing to HERO One, the Headquarters of H.E.R.O. The shores of East Flank were a bit difficult to move around, considering how much wealthy people seemed to be obsessed with waterfront property and the trouble it was to find a clear shot to Savior Island that wasn't blocked by a building. Luckily, he eventually found his straight shot, and Chad did the (somehow) easier part.

People usually think you need to be running at an incredibly fast speed to run on water, and while it's true that it is impossible for a normal person, Chad was faster than most people. Even he thought running on water would be difficult at first, but after his first three weeks of training, he could do it with little discomfort. Of course, it was probably made easier by the fact his vision was much poorer at the speeds he was moving and he didn't need to worry about looking out at the seemingly endless ocean. Chad was more nervous about stopping on the island without crashing, and while it was a bit difficult considering he had never been to Savior Island, he managed to slow enough near the end to land himself safely near H.E.R.O One. Chad allowed himself to grow a smug smirk beneath his helmet. He couldn't have managed that when he first got his powers, no way in hell!

"Let's Go! It's Bullet Time, baby! I'm gonna be a hero, I'm gonna be a hero, WOOOOOO!!!"

Chad should have been feeling fear, and some anger at his stupidity. While Chad thinks and THE BULLET acts, Chad has never committed a major crime before. The Bullet, however, had the bright idea to run from a Villain-infested city to the Headquarters of H.E.R.O, dressed in an all-black armored costume that concealed his face, and shouted the words "It's Bullet Time" very loudly. Most people would call this a bad start to their hero career.






@Hitman
Here's my character - let me know what I should change, I'm pretty tired when finishing this so it might not be the highest quality lol.



I'm completing this very late and I'm exhausted, so if something is wrong with the sheet let me know.



Ended up being a lot smaller than I was expecting it to be - may update it in the future to pad it out more. Sorry for taking as long as I did lol.
@Hitman
Hey there, I'm also interested if there is still room!

Edit: Just saw that you guys closed up - guess I was a little too slow lol! I'll keep an eye out if you guys open up again.
Interested in one of those Master Slots!
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