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The town stood silent. A dark grey had taken the sky and hollow wind blew between the hovels of the settlement. The usual guards of the palisade and tower were gone, in fact no one was outside, except for the savior of the town. Standing in front of the town, without an ounce of worry or concern on her face was Benea. She stood as if she were waiting for a letter, or perhaps expecting a loaf of bread to rise. Her arms were crossed, stuffing her ivory staff into the crook of her arm. Completely encircling her were eight fully armored paladins.
Copper glinted, reflecting the glory of Benea off their sheen. Shaggy fur plumed wherever the segmented metal stopped and experienced eyes peered from behind visors. At the fore was the largest of the eight paladins, Jermane. He stood holding a round shield as sturdy and imposing as him in his left hand and an equally large shield in his right, both armed with a long spike protruding from the center bosses.
“Well well well, who do we have here?” A familiar, raspy, somewhat muffled voice echoed from the woods, followed by the heavy footsteps of an armour-clad warrior. The first thing that Benea saw coming from the direction of the voice was a glint of light reflected off a metal helmet that she’d seen before plus the vague shapes of dozens of oversized beasts, all stalking through the overgrowth and keeping out of direct sight, though the stalking did nothing to hide their growling and foaming mouths. “If it isn’t the Hydra-lover, along with her boyfriend and many consorts.” Declared the armoured Goddess, coming out of the woods to stand a few meters in front of the group and taking the moment to toss her dented helmet away and regard Benea with a raised eyebrow. “You are here to cover for the humans, I take it? You should be ready to make yourself a new dress if that’s the case, cause the one you’re wearing is going to get wrecked, princess.”
A half-crescent grin curled on Benea’s lips. “I have no idea who you are, darling.”
While Jermane seemed to seize up defensively, Benea kept her usual aloofness about how she stood, with no inclination that she was either in danger or prepared for anything physical, let alone a battle. After her words left her mouth she pinched her chin in a fake curiosity. “Unless of course you all might be the rabble-rousers who have been harassing the gentle people of this town. In which case I do insist on relocating. It’s nothing personal, dear.”
"Ah! You said the word yourself, 'gentle'. The people here are too gentle! All they can do to protect themselves is throw stones, so I'm giving them a push in the right direction." Eleanna nodded in satisfaction at her own words, and proceeded to point her finger at Benea. "Now princess, get out of my way. I admire your guts but you're outmatched and although your beefcake boyfriend looks strong, I doubt he can take on many of my wild friends."
“Again, dear, I have no idea what you’re spouting about.” Benea tapped her cheek in wonder. “I don't suppose you’d prefer to have a pleasant talk about whatever it is that ails you over a nice meal? Perhaps after a bath…” She paused and sniffed. “A very thorough bath.”
The warrior scoffed, “Ah yes, the scent of hard continuous work, how offensive to the senses!” Eleanna declared with a roll of her eyes. “If you want to say something, say it. I have no time for gossip, nice meals or baths. I’d rather we fight it out to be honest…” She trailed off, impatiently starting to tap a foot on the gravel.
“I’m just saying, dear, a little lavender might go very far in your case. Oh! Have you ever tried mixing it with the milk of a coconut?” Benea clasped her hands, getting a few looks from the townspeople peeking out from their hiding places — the paladins on the other hand seemed forever focused, or perhaps desensitized.
Eleanna sighed and deflated a bit. “No. No, I haven’t.”
“Well that’s it, you absolutely must come with me!” Benea flashed a wide, white smile. She took a few steps away from the entire ordeal, the paladins keeping pace. “Come on, dear!”
Eleanna gave a few hand signals to the beasts in the woods and then groaned and followed Benea, pretty much dragging her spear along the ground.
Before Eleanna knew it, Benea was at her side, spouting an endless stream of confessions and ideas. “You know,” she started. “You really are an autumn, but I was wondering what a spring look on you might do for your demeanor. Of course such a change should match your fragrance, dear, so perhaps something with daisies…”
“My lady,” Karlene piped up from behind Benea.
“Yes, darling?”
“There still is the matter of the beasts.”
The goddess perked up and looked at Eleanna, who suddenly looked a lot livelier. “Oh dear, that’s right. Shall they be joining us?”
“Well, who knows! Maybe your waiting staff should go out and find them, otherwise they might miss the party.” Eleanna said with a smirk.
Benea let loose a loud, high-note laugh before grinning at Eleanna. “Oh you silly little scamp, I like to think I’m host enough to go and invite my own guests.” Benea’s hand squeezed Eleanna’s shoulder before turning them both completely around to walk back to the woods. “Come on, then. In the thickets, yes?”
”God damn.” Eleanna cursed under her breath. “They’re very busy. Training, shaving, taking baths. Whatever. Let’s get our thing over with.”
“They… shave in the woods?” Benea offered Eleanna an arched brow. “Well that explains your wardrobe, dear. Don’t worry, Benea is here for you.” She said while Eleanna huffed and crossed her arms, Benea practically dragged her along at that point.
A soft and playful hum vibrated from the goddess’ throat as she came to a stop before the thicket of woods and underbrush. She put one hand on Eleanna’s shoulder and the other she gently stamped her staff into the ground, putting her weight onto it.
“Now where could they be?”
Eleanna slapped Benea’s hand off her shoulder and squared up to her, staring daggers. “That’s none of your business, princess. I mean it when I say this, stop wasting my time. We’re either fighting or you’re getting out of my way and letting me do my job. I don’t have time for any tea, or any biz-quits, and definitely none of your lava coconut shampew or whatever.” As Eleanna finished her rant, more than a dozen beasts rushed out of the woods and surrounded the pair of goddesses, with another dozen growling and hissing and barking at the paladins to keep them away. Their salivating mouths, bloodshot eyes, and twitching muscles betrayed their lust for blood.
Benea cackled. “No need to be so frustrated, darling, it’s all in good fun — here, I’ll show you.”
Before Benea’s sentence could even finish, a powerful white flash overtook the scene. Everything was swallowed by the nothingness and while all senses shut down, Benea’s were alert — and her voice permeated through the veil. “I think I’m going to indeed try the coconut lavender idea first, dear. What do you think?”
Of course there was no way Eleanna could respond as all went white.
Sluggishly, Eleanna awoke and found her feet. She groaned, just now feeling the way her body ached. It was that familiar way that she felt each morning, after waking up from a long night of sleeping on the ground… The only difference being, of course, the fact that she couldn’t really think that well.
Sand shifted somewhere behind her – Footsteps. She shot around, or at least tried to, and found herself tripping on something and falling face-down into the hot sand mid-turn.
A familiar half-baked chuckle reached her ears. She twitched and pulled herself together, feeling a full face blush starting to build.
“You look… cute?” It sounded more like a question than a statement. Eleanna looked up with a raised eyebrow to see her ex-boyfriend, Sun, sitting on the sand right in front of her. His sharp teeth glinted in the sunshine, and his carefully groomed coat of short silver hair seemed to glow with the heat of the desert.
As she processed what he had said, Eleanna felt her heart skip a beat, but for entirely the wrong reasons. He said she looked ‘cute’, which was wrong. She wasn’t supposed to look ‘cute’! She was supposed to be fearsome and awe-inspiring! As the Bronzed Bloom of the Daman Lands, she had a very specific image to uphold! Cute just wouldn’t cut it.
“Hah.” Eleanna faked a chuckle, looking away from Sun. He was just messing with her, like always… She hadn’t changed her clothes in months, so she was anything but cute…
A spark went off in her head as soon as she noticed a pair of were-humans nearby, happily sniffing each other and wagging their canine tails. Their coats looked clean and brushed and shiny, and their scars were no longer visible. They looked more like regular pet dogs than war beasts.
“No way…”
Following that, she noticed some hissing and saw a pair of anaconda-like were-beasts admiring each other’s heads, or more specifically, the massive red bows tied around their heads. They, too, looked rested and clean and nothing like the wild beasts that they were supposed to be.
“No, no, no…” Eleanna’s breath came quickly as she rushed back up onto her feet and examined the area around her and Sun. All the were-beasts that she and Were-Taker spent months training now looked like snobby pets and showed no sign of wanting to taste even a small drop of human blood.
Once more since waking up, Eleanna dropped to her knees, shaking.
She tried to get her breathing under control, but it did no good. Her chest felt tight, her nose started to run a little, and the final straw was when she noticed that her outfit felt much lighter than usual. No longer was she wearing her layers upon layers of leathers and chainmail, but a dangerously light, long white dress with a disgustingly fancy pleated hem and equally ridiculous green floral pattern cut around the waist.
Sun walked up to her, carrying something in his right hand and using his left to pat her on the head.
“There, there, dummy. You do look good, you know.” He said, in a tone that made Eleanna look up into his eyes, her own eyes wide and teary. Deliberately, he knelt in front of her and grabbed a lock of her hair and sniffed it, nodding to himself after doing so. “You also smell good. First time for you, huh?”
The bronzed warrior gasped as soon as she noticed the state of her hair and the silver flowers weaved in with it, plus the lavender-coconut scent it gave off, and bawled.
“Oh, and that’s not all, by the way.”
“H-How?! I’ve been h-humilliated, Sun! I… I didn’t even get to throw a punch!” Eleanna said in between sobs.
“Well, at least she gave you a farewell gift. Look.” He said and placed a moderately sized woven basket in front of Eleanna just as she began to calm down. The contents were just dozens upon dozens of small blocks of lavender-coloured blocks. “They don’t taste too bad.” He admitted, pointing at one with a large piece missing.
“Food…? You ate food an enemy gave us.” She wiped at her eyes, a small sob wracking her body as she picked that same half-eaten block and gave it a bite as well, cringing at the extremely strange texture and astringent taste. She spat it out, with Sun laughing at her scrunched up face. “It sucks.”
“Yeah, it does.” Sun said in between laughs, finally patting her on the head again and standing up, offering her a hand which she took. “I do mean it when I say you look and smell good though, as it stands I could even take you to the Festival of the Bronzed Bloom.”
“What? Really? But I thought-”
“That was a lie, the truth is that women have to wear ceremonial dresses to attend the Festival, and I knew you would have flipped out if I tried to force you into one, Anna.” Sun sighed and picked up the gift basket with one hand and held Eleanna’s hand with the other.
“So the reason you broke up with me…” Eleanna asked demurely, looking away and allowing Sun to lead the way.
“Was because you ignore all our customs. You like to think you’re the ‘Bronzed Bloom’ or whatever, but in reality no one really likes it when you crash into our festivities and change everything. I broke up with you to get you to travel and see reality. Being a Goddess won’t automatically mean that you’re going to be in the right or have the power to be victorious every time, dummy.”
Eleanna was silent for a long time, and throughout that time the couple walked through the desert, leaving behind the reformed were-humans and now heading for the heart of the Daman Lands once again.
After an hour or so of walking, Eleanna spoke again.
“My armour is gone… And my spear…” She whispered sadly.
“Yeah, maybe now you’ll get to wear real clothes and stop tying trophies to your spear like a freak.”
“Why are you so mean to me, aren’t boyfriends supposed to be the opposite of mean?”
“Aren’t girlfriends supposed to bathe and wash their clothes at least once a week?”
Eleanna sighed and kept walking.
