Milkman

Empires of Sand

<Snipped quote by Milkman>

Hi Milkman

Reviewed your application.

A few notes:

1) the Elvea. Clearly elves by a (barely) different name. Since we're trying to get away from the D&D races, lets nix these dudes or give them an interesting spin and a new name.

2) the Anthro-Fennecians. Firstly, the name is a bit cumbersome and unnatural. lets go with Fennecians? Second, the race itself is a bit cutesy/JRPGish/Narnian for the setting. Lets maybe try to make them seem more at home in a world full of horrible tentacle elves and roving mutants, etc? No furry fox tails. Please.

3) Confederation of the 8 great democratic Anthro-Fennecian City States. same thing with the name here, a bit cumberson and unnatural. The Fennecian Confederacy or the Democratic League or something would have a more organic ring to it.

In general, I like the level of detail and appreciate your enthusiasm for this RP which is ALIVE! POST! Ahem. But I think you need to grimdark your faction and race up a few notches and make it aesthetically at home with some of the other factions. More this, less this. Sound good?

@Flagg

Thanks for the feedback. I'll get to work with it :)

Empires of Sand

I find the lack of activity in this RP disturbing :(

Empires of Sand

I think we should incoorporate Oqers in the world of Azoth. It will make the world more divers and alive in my opinion.

A good way to make an opening post is to present your nation with a large (political) challange. This challange is then the prime motivator for the actions your nation is going to take. Those actions will have effects on your population, neighbors or the gods above and will in turn lead for hooks for other players to get involved.

For my nation it kind of works like this. The primary challange it currently faces is that its population has expanded to rapidly (due to immigration) to a point that her fresh water sources can no longer sustain the massive numbers. This already gives me a lot to write about on both a political level and an individual character level.

On a political level I can now write about politicians that discuss the unfolding crisis, how to share the water among the citystates and how to ration the water among the population. They might decide to kick out hundreds of thousands of immigrants who follow the Cult of Azar. March them off into the desert without enough water and have most of them die. Some might reach Azar to tell the god-king about this atrocity.

This small scenario will be translated into a number of parts for the IC post

1. Introducing the challange and come to a political decision about it.
2. Write about the execution of the decision. Now I can write about soldiers who round up thousands of unwanted civilians and march them off.
3. In the 3th part of the post I go down to an individual character level or small group and write about the hardships they endure until they reach Azar. I might end with a single character knocking on the Imperial Palace door.

This is pretty much how I aproach creating my posts :)

Empires of Sand

Hi team,

@Dead Cruiser, @Darkmatter, @Pepperm1nts, @Gorgenmast, @Chairman Stein, @Arawak Just checking in to say sorry for not being around, had a crazy weekend. Please, if you're approved, post ICly! Let's not let this die? If it does die, I'm going to recreate a version of it as a fantasy RP in the Advanced section.

@Raptorman sorry for not replying to your PM, will try to do so today

@Milkman sorry again for the continued delay, will look over your sheet shortly.

@Sigma & @Rhymer: still with us?

@Flagg

I really hope you will review and aprove shortly. I am filled with idea's that will build further upon what has been posted so far :)

Empires of Sand

@Milkman my apologies for not reviewing your sheet yet, I will try to do so tomorrow when I have a spare moment.

@Flagg

Have you found the time yet to review my nationsheet?

Empires of Sand

I am looking forward to start posting in IC :D

Empires of Sand

Flagg, can you review my nationsheet?

Empires of Sand

I think I am pretty much done with my nationsheet.

Empires of Sand

So question: Who is settled around the coasts of the Great Sea? Thinking of setting my faction somewhere there.

@Sigma

I have my nation on the east bank of the Great sea at the moment.

Edit:

That was my plan but I am going to change that a bit as my nation would be roughly located at the same place as the nation of Dead Cruiser. Or that was my original idea. I'll proberbly relocate to North-East, bordering the Azar Empire :)

Empires of Sand

@Flagg

Are you interested in having some form of historic grievance between our nations? As my nation is heavily reliant on immigrants for magic roles it might be along the lines that the Drathan union views my nation as a force that corrupts individual Dratha with the prospects of large supplies of water.