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W-What the fuuu…
-Norika Tsukishima


No matter how prepared Norika thought she was, nothing could have prepared her for the voice which called out from the other side of her bedroom door.

“N-No…” she whispered in stunned terror as she clutched her hands over her furiously racing heart.

No no no no no no NO!!! Norika cried into the horrified depths of her mind. I-It… I-It can’t be…!

But she knew it was. Even if it sounded a bit muffled, there could be no mistaking that slightly chipper, boyish voice.

W-What the hell is he doing here?! her mind screamed, even as her meek voice stammered an utterly untrue, “Y-Yes…” in response to his query. Of course she wasn’t ready for another session of passive aggressive verbal sparring with this annoying brat, but it wasn’t as if she had any choice.

Yet, if the boy’s voice was shocking, his appearance when the door finally swung open was even more so.

W-What the fuck is he wearing?! Norika wondered, even as she gasped at the bizarre sight, her frail, shuddering form cringing in fear where it sat on the bed.

The whole situation was so surreal, so much like some feverish dream or nightmare, that Norika was too busy trying to wrap her dizzy head around what was happening to fully register, let alone comprehend, what her “tutor” was saying. The hats on sticks he was waving in front of her only added to the absurdity.

Finally, Norika was able to compose her whirling thoughts enough to speak. “F-Finn…?” she asked hesitantly. “W-What are you doing here? A-And what is that you’re wearing?

L-Learning is actually kinda fun...
-Norika Tsukishima


Norika’s teeth ground together upon hearing the maids’ words. It was no secret that they despised her. Practically everyone did. As she forced herself to slowly get ready for the coming day, and, most pressingly, her impending tutoring session, the frail girl found herself considering if, perhaps, framing one of the maids for the break in might actually be the best course of action. She’d initially been reluctant to pin the blame on someone in such close proximity to both her home and herself for a variety of reasons, but with things becoming increasingly complicated, the possibility was looking more attractive by the minute. She would have to discuss the matter with Roche when they met later that day.

Speaking of Roche, thanks to the Rule Keeper’s guidance, Norika had begun to grow significantly more proficient in her studies, and her confidence in herself had grown along with it. Thus, she was now starting to enjoy her other tutoring sessions as well. It was always immensely satisfying to see the looks of shock on her disdainful instructors’ faces when she managed to accomplish far more than they believed a stupid failure like her could ever achieve. Of course, they never gave her more than the most minimal and begrudging of praise, but Norika didn’t care. The wonderful feeling of triumph was all that really mattered to her, and as she prepared for the day’s lesson, she eagerly awaited her chance to metaphorically shove all the instructor’s snide remarks about her lack of intelligence right down their throat.


Octolys had continued his seemingly months-long journey to the rear wall of the vast prison complex without pause or obstruction when, suddenly, a new development concerning his scout craft caused the eldritch being to freeze in his tracks. Despite its dark matter obscurement veil, the scout had been detected by the surprisingly powerful, and now, it would seem, surprisingly perceptive, swordswoman. Yet, instead of dispatching the creature-craft as she had the amalgamated monstrosity, the woman simply uttered disdainful sounding words in her strange tongue, before departing.

Although he was loath to send out his last remaining scout craft (Was this single vessel really all that remained of the once-sizable reconnaissance contingent of his once-mighty forces?), Octolys wished to learn more of this woman, who, out of all the combatants he had thus far seen in this prison, was clearly the most formidable by a considerable margin. Thus, with a mighty sweep of a tentacular appendage, the Dark Matter Domiarch sent his final scout craft hurtling through the air to land at a destination carefully chosen for its exemplarily concealment factors. With these augmenting the eldritch craft’s own undetection attributes, Octolys was certain that its observations would not evoke a similar response to that which befell its ill-fated predecessor…

The drone’s hiding spot was well selected. A shadowy space on a shelf above some collector’s edition of some once valuable army starter set. The box had several holes in it from where figures had torn their way out and joined the prison fight. From here, Octolys could see his target.



Like him, Kurosame appeared to be heading for the back wall. Though rather than to hide, it was likely to find more treasure and fight whatever was guarding it. But she did not rush past the scout craft’s hiding spot. Upon arrival at the collector’s box, Kurosame slowed way down. She landed on the shelf with her sword drawn, wearily crossing it. Her hat made it hard to tell what direction she was looking in, but it was clear she didn’t see the scout craft. It seemed that Kurosame’s perceptive abilities had their limits.

Then a pint sized ogre that was half of her hight rushed out of the box to attack her. It roared and flailed its grey, plastic arms. It reached for her, but with a single kick, she sent it flying back into the box. The stealth craft bounced, but the box itself had caved in where the ogre had been kicked to. It deformed the top of the box just enough that the hapless craft went sliding right towards the ogre. Kurosame let out a warcry before thrusting her sword towards the ogre, but it quickly grabbed the craft and batted her sword off to the side before chucking it at her face. A tip of her head was enough to send the craft bouncing off her head, but not without flinging her hat off in the process. Kuro growled and swung her sword, this time racing water along its edge. It wouldn’t be incorrect to say it was like a chainsaw, but it was more correct to call it a pressurized water jet. The flow of water chipped apart the ogre as fast as she could swing, and it was executed in a single blow.

The hatless assassin turned her head to look at the stealth craft. She lifted her hand, and the water scattered by her blade coalesced around the thing to bring it closer to her face. After a brief examination, she made more angry noises before taking off again. This time however, Octolys knew exactly where she was headed, and knew it would not be long before Kuro was upon him.

“By the Tesseract Towers of Ty’Zoth!” Octolys gasped, eyes widening as he watched the results of the second scout craft’s highly unfortuitous discovery unfold through the servitor creature-construct’s own optical nodes. Yet, far worse than simply discovering the luckless scout, the swordswoman he’d sent it to observe now seemed to be heading straight for him! Flight was not an option, even if his pride were to allow it, but even a being as arrogant as Thyerg’Octolys was forced to concede that this woman might just be a foe beyond his current, distressingly diminished, capabilities. Even so, he refused to capitulate without a struggle most mighty, and thus he gathered what was left of his forces and deployed them in combat formation jhornophon, the spacings and angles between each mind-linked minion, be they dark matter warrior, dark matter attack beast, chitinous cannon crawler, or octo-emissary, forming ultra-etheric trans-phasic conduits of hyper-dimensional power.

“Come then, if you dare!” Octolys proclaimed, even as the sides of his eldritch form unfolded to reveal the cruel contours of three hexa-harmonic omni-spectrum hypermatter harpoon projectors. “Come and be unmade by the maleficent might of Thyerg’Octolys, Domiarch of the 94837568th Negaprism!”

Kurosame also said something, likely drawing comparisons between Octolys and some other unsavory creature.

She flung the stealth fighter into Octolys’s troops to break apart their formation before preparing her massive blade. Much like the tiny ogre, water raced around its edge and a fog followed the blade’s path. The assassin howled as she drew near her target.

To Octolys’ continued and ever-heightening appallment, the violent return of his second scout craft was in no way negated by the multi-faceted polymorphic omnidimensional defensive matrix which should have profusely protected his remaining forces. Instead, the most ironic projectile smashed into the precisely placed formation with all the force of an Nth space nega-sphere traveling at superluminal velocities. Far worse was to follow when, after recomposing themselves with commendable rapidity, his dark-matter legion’s subsequent barrage of eldritch biomechanical weaponry failed to materialize in any perceptible way, shape, or form! “What is this sinisterly sublime sorcery?!” Octolys wondered with increasing alarm. Yet, there was still his cannon crawler, and by some dark matter miracle, its cosmic cross-continua hyper-quantum singularity coil cannon managed to fire its fearsome poly-phasic projectile at the swordswoman with all the reality plenum-shattering power a compressed spring could provide!

Kurosame spun as she approached, not unlike a twister. Her sword cut clean through everything, bisecting all of Octolys’s forces. The dark matter warrior, dark matter attack beast, chitinous cannon crawler, octo-emissary, the hexa-harmonic omni-spectrum hypermatter harpoon projectors, and Octolys himself were bisected in the blink of an eye. But such speed granted by the mask would prove to be her downfall. She had been unable to perceive the relatively slow firing rate of the spring projectile, which finished following its trajectory as soon as Kuro finished her swing. Her hatless head was struck, and popped off of the neck socket. She dropped her sword and attempted to grab her head, but ended up half juggling it before falling off the side of the shelf along with her sword.

“I-Inconceivable!” Octolys cried as his eldritch biomechanical form was split in twain. “Y-Yet, even if I must greet oblivion, I shall delight in knowing that you shall greet it with me!” the dark matter Domiarch taunted as his two halves plummeted to the floor far below.

However, before either half could strike the ground, a portal, bordered by crackling tendrils of yellowy-green lightning, tore open to completely swallow them up. On the other side of the shelf, an identical hole in reality consumed Kuro’s falling form. An instant later, the twin gateways blinked out of existence, leaving no trace of themselves. As for Kuro and Octolys, neither swordswoman nor domiarch would ever be seen again…



To Connie’s great relief, her magic seemed to be effective at ensuring that the menacing mollusks would not soon awaken from their nightmare prison, and thus prove no impediment to a potential scouting mission. “T-Thanks, Lily,” she replied after hearing the greenette’s congratulations, her mask forming a happy smile.

Alicia then suggested that Ronin, Miko, and Alexander should be the ones to explore the passage, prompting a frown to form on the face of Connie’s mask. “P-Please be c-careful!” she bid the trio, her trembling hands clasped together in front of her chest.

When she noticed the small team preparing to embark, Gaia spoke up, tentatively raising a viridescent finger, “Might it not be best if…?”

“We remove the oysters first”, was what the verdant maiden was going to say, but before she could finish, the ever impetuous Ronin had already entered the stone walrus head.

“Well, I suppose that also works,” Gaia conceded with a small sigh. She had thought the three reinforcement specialists might want to conserve their mana, but this course of action did have the benefit of being faster, and time was something of the essence, after all.






“Wowie zowie~!” MDP exclaimed upon catching sight of the queen’s castle at long last, her rambling song coming to an abrupt halt, just as the Princess of Dreams herself did, rocking back on her heels and dramatically placing a hand over her eyes so she could better peer off into the distance. “Like, theresie wheresies the castle wastle placey wacey~! And, like, soooo many wany people weple are playing waying a really biggy wiggy gamey wamey all aroundy woundy it~! (giggle!) And insidey widey it, too~!” she added with a big smile as she began excitedly bouncing up and down. “Like, Magical Dream Princess even weven sees Mayra Wayra over theresie wheresie~! Actually wactually, she sees lots and lots of Mayra Wayras~! (giggle!) Like, Magical Dream Princess wants to play, too~!” the whimsical girl cheered, holding her arms out like airplane wings and running towards the (about to be far more) chaotic battle. “Like, come onsie wonsie, everybodywody~!” she called to her procession of friends. “We’re allsie wallsie gonna havey wavey, like, soooo much funsie wunsie together wether~! (giggle!)”
Since it looks like I'm next in the order, I shall try to have a post up in a day or two.
Everyone still actively involved have already discussed it and agreed to it.


I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to call bullshit on this. I'm still "involved" (as involved as anyone can be in an RP that hasn't had an IC post since June) and I haven't discussed or agreed to anything.

M-Morning already…?
-Norika Tsukishima


Norika winced as the sound of her bedside alarm shattered her restful slumber. She had been having a most wonderful dream, one in which Kaito was still alive and she wasn’t weak and sickly. The two of them were having a fun day at the arcade, playing all sorts of games and eating lots of pizza and snacks. Roche had been there, too, even Haruna. It had been so very enjoyable, but, alas, she knew it couldn’t last. At some point, she knew she would have wake up and face her cold, painful reality.

Opening her tired eyes, Norika slowly forced her emaciated body to sit up, her many blankets still wrapped around her meager frame. She knew a servant would be arriving with her breakfast soon, and although she hated having to get up, she much preferred to do so on her own in response to the relatively pleasant sounds of her alarm, then be forced awake by angry yelling. As expected, it wasn’t long before her breakfast tray arrived. Upon it was her usual morning meal, if it could even be called such: a canned protein shake and a small bowl filled with various medicine capsules and vitamin supplements. Oh how she longed to be able to eat a real breakfast, but she knew her poor constitution would never permit it. At least the servant departed as swiftly as they’d arrived, allowing her to eat in some small measure of peace.

As she swallowed each pill with a gulp of her shake, Norika’s thoughts again turned to her most pressing problem, the one that had been hanging over her for the past several weeks like an anvil poised to crush her into bloody paste. Just when she thought she had figured out a solution, she was confronted with another new complication. Employing the wig to frame a particularly hated individual for the theft of her parents’ money was seeming less and less practical with each passing day, and as if one nosy detective wasn’t bad enough, now this teenage investigative prodigy had gotten involved. Although she didn’t have any concrete proof, she was almost certain that he had mystical powers of some nature, which made dealing with him exceptionally dangerous. And all that was before one even got to poor Misoka’s family and their ruined flower shop. This whole mess had started because of an attempt to help them, and yet, here they were, possibly even worse off than before, all because of her horrible, heartless parents, and that horrible, heartless bitch, Ashbringer…

She knew she had to do something, but she remained completely at a loss as to what. If only all her problems could be solved with a death ray to the face…

Zoppy

Wow! wow! Zoppy ‘earz new customerz! Zoppy can’t wait fer dem ta get ta ‘er shoppy!
-Zoppy


An overjoyed smile of purest delight spread across Zoppy’s tiny face as the sounds of the Brave Friends’ battle chatter reached her oversized ears. The deformed goblin girl was so very happy to finally have new customers, and a lot of them, by the sounds of it. She was also very glad that she had so many new wares to sell them, and had gotten so much help with setting up her shop, or rather, her table. In fact, she was so happy and so excited, that her heart had begun racing quite fast indeed. Let’s hope she doesn’t wind up giving herself a heart attack…
In a distant reality plenum, there is a peculiar planet known as the World With No Name. Upon its bizarre patchwork surface can be found the Wandering Wood, and within this mystical, sentient forest is located a certain traveling treehouse tavern. A quaint and charming refuge for weary travelers and local forest residents alike, on this enchanted eve, with the soft, golden glow of myriad fireflies augmented by the glorious radiance of all three of the world’s mystical moons waxing full, the enchanted establishment’s various patrons (including a renowned moth feykin oracle and a certain interdimensional freelance photographer) had the pleasure of being serenaded by…


The famous frog bard sat atop an oversized toadstool, supplementing the ambient night music provided by the various other forest creatures with a relaxing melody strummed on his guitar. However, it was not just songs Balthazar was renowned for, but also stories…

“And now, my dear audience,” the bard announced after plucking out the final notes of his latest tune. “I ask that you draw near your attention, for tonight I shall recount a most unusual tale, and one containing a very important lesson. Many moons ago, on a night much like this one, I had the great honor to be counted among a party of brave heroes who had set out to vanquish a tumorous outgrowth of the Abyssal Convergence which had taken root right here in the Wandering Woods like an unwelcome wart on the world’s big toe. But overcoming the Abyssal threat wasn’t the only challenge we faced. You see,” he continued. “No matter the power of its members, for any given party of heroes to have any chance of succeeding at their quest, those same members must overcome their innate differences and work together as a unified team. Their myriad quirks and foibles must serve to strengthen the whole, rather than tear it asunder. As it happened, our party would find that goal a particularly difficult one to achieve…”









“Thus our tale ends,” Balthazar concluded. “Not with a single hero, nor a single method, but with five companions united in friendship. Magic and machinery, logic and lunacy, song and starlight, all woven together as threads in one tapestry. A tapestry strong enough to save the Wandering Woods and, indeed, to accomplish anything. Always remember the lesson this tale teaches,” the bard advised as he looked over his audience. “That every mind, every method, and every voice adds something vital, that even the most mismatched companions can save the world, so long as they do not try to do so alone, and you, too, shall be able to triumph over even the most formidable of challenges.”

Speaking of challenges, do you know who else recently made a diverse collection of new friends and learned about all the wonderful benefits of working together with said new friends to accomplish something truly amazing?


Zoppy

Zoppy got ‘elp ta make ‘er shoppy!
-Zoppy


Despite her best efforts, Zoppy was (predictably) unable to make much progress in carving out her shop from the dungeon wall. However, some of the minion monsters noticed what she was doing and, feeling bad for the deformed little thing, offered to lend her a small amount of assistance. While she still wouldn’t be able to have a new chamber for her shop, with the help of these greatly appreciated new friends working in concert, a small table was formed out of a tightly packed pile of assorted rubble from the other excavation efforts. “Dankz lotz!” Zoppy told them with a happy smile. Upon the makeshift table’s mostly flat surface, the intrepid merchant laid out her various wares, they being a few stones, sticks, the clump of now mostly dry moss the treant had placed atop her slumbering form, and three of the bone daggers the Oracle had crafted (which the naga was kind enough to carry over and place so that poor Zoppy didn’t accidentally cut or stab herself) . Now she just had to wait until her latest potential customers arrived.



Gaia smiled at Branch Nose as the small ent sitting on her shoulder offered to serve as a scout. “That is most courageous of you, but I would still prefer not to risk even your substitute body when a few vine tendrils could easily serve in that role,” the verdant maiden told him. “After all, if something were to happen to your vessel, it would take no small amount of time and effort to allow you to rejoin us in a similar fashion.”

Meanwhile, Connie’s mask also formed an appreciative smile when Lily took her hand. It was a great blessing to have made such a kind friend, although the timid girl could do without the bubbly greenette’s impulsive hyperactivity. Giving a small gasp as Lily pulled her forward to look inside the stone walrus head’s gaping maw, the masked maiden gave voice to an alarmed cry when she, too, noticed the menacing oyster-creatures, one only slightly stifled by quickly raising a trembling hand to cover her mouth.

“Hmmm… That does indeed seem to be quite the problematic obstacle…” Gaia concurred with a thoughtful frown as she joined Lily and Connie in front of the opening, the botanical beauty’s graceful fingers giving her dismayed best friend’s shoulders a comforting massage. “While I might be able to neutralize them myself, I believe my dearest Connie’s nightmare magic would be more effective in that regard,” she added. “Do you think you can trap them in a nightmare deep enough so that they won’t awaken while Branch Nose and I retrieve them, little sister?” the nymph-like magical girl inquired.

“I-I can t-try,” Connie replied with as much determination as she could muster, despite her clear trepidation.

Taking a deep breath, the masked maiden gathered her mystic power, raised a trembling hand, and fired a focused pulse of nightmare energy down the narrow passage. With luck, it would ensure that none of the oyster-creatures would emerge from their now far less pleasant slumber any time soon.






MDP continued her incredibly annoying cheerful song even as her strange procession moved from desert to grassy plain, its cutesy lyrics changing to reflect this. At this point I would perhaps try to pad out the rest of this section with the rambling lyrics for this song, but since I don’t want to subject anyone to that level of torture, I shall refrain. If, for whatever masochistic reason you wish to imagine what said song sounds like, just think of a hellish hybrid of the most annoying song from a children's show you’ve ever heard and the most sickeningly kawaiiko song the most sickeningly kawaiiko anime girl idol has ever sang. Though I’m sure nobody reading this is actually crazy enough to want to do that.
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