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as a patreon reward I will read your least favorite person's handmade custom tabletop RPG homebrew and ask them why they didn't just run it in 5e instead
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Bio

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@Kensai
Yeah, it kind of occurred to me on review that I accidentally made things a bit too similar (wrote most of it in a single drunken haze). Can rework it if you think it's stepping on your toes too much.

Lieutenant Aria Dvalin


Age: 23
Archetype: Soldier/Commander
Gender: Female
Appearance: 5’8”, lithe build, typically wearing either a flightsuit or formal officer dress.
Occupation: Lancer, Imperial Army Lieutenant
Affiliations: Imperial Court (former), House Dvalin, Imperial Army
Skills and Abilities:
  • Ruthless Aggression: Disgraced, hungry for accolades, and willing to do anything in the name of victory, Aria bears a fire in her that serves her well on the battlefield. She bears no aversion towards wetwork and dishonorable tactics, not batting an eye if that’s what it takes to succeed in a mission.
  • Noble Contacts: Even with House Svalin in a state of humiliation and near-ruin, debts must be paid. Any noble house with enough decades and centuries to its pedigree bears a long line of alliances and favors owed, all informally categorized but still remembered. Aria can leverage what remains of her family’s reputation to at least receive audiences with the house’s old allies, though whether or not she receives aid at a bearable cost, or any aid at all, is up in the air.
  • Budding Ace: While still young, Aria’s begun to build a reputation for herself as an up-and-comer in the military, irrespective of her family’s reputation. She impressed in simulations at pilot academy and performed well enough in her first deployment that her name is likely on a shortlist somewhere in terms of military careers to watch out for.


Faults and Limitations:
  • Recklessly Aggressive: The same will and fire that fuels Aria is also a double-edged sword. She’s all too willing to discard good sense and caution if she thinks she can leverage an advantage, and is easily goaded in the face of perceived timidity or cowardice.
  • Disgraced Name: Hans Dvalin, Aria’s father, was accused of and convicted in seventeen cases of illegal market manipulation, deception of Imperial authorities, and murder of a rival noble competitor. For this, House Svalin’s assets were seized and its name muddied, the pieces left for Aria to pick up. Those with any knowledge of the Imperial Court will recognize her family name and the disgrace associated with it.


Biography:
Born as the first daughter and eldest child to the venerable and noble House Dvalin, Aria spent her childhood raised on Old Earth itself, her family a prominent player in the Imperial Court. She was at least acquainted with several of Emperor Aurelius’s imperial scions, though the only one that could be called a friend was one Prince Cassian. They were playmates and schoolmates in their youth, with Aria trying her best to rein in his budding excesses in their pre-adolescent years, lest he drag her down when he was inevitably caught.

The silver lining there was that she didn’t have to personally witness Cassian’s descent into scandal and debauchery during their teenage years, as House Dvalin was implicated in graft, treachery, and murder. All common failings of the high nobility, but to be caught was to be punished severely. Aria’s parents were executed, their assets seized, and both she and her younger siblings were split up and rendered wards of the state. House Dvalin still existed, as the children weren’t technically punished for the sins of their parents, and she was now its head, but that was to be a matriarch of nothing. Her extended family saw which way the wind was blowing and scattered both physically and socially, leaving her alone.

And all of that just wouldn’t do. Having been raised in the highest halls of power itself, Aria swore to return one day and bring her family name back to prominence. Of course, a teenage girl with no resources and a tarred name had no way of doing that alone. Thus, the moment she came of age, she applied to and was accepted into an imperial military academy. Aria spent her academy years pouring blood, sweat, and tears into ensuring she was to be the best she could be, and was rewarded by passing with flying colors, earning the privilege of being named a Lancer and sent along to her first deployment immediately. She performed with distinction against pirates, raiders, and rebels, but still knew that this wasn’t catapulting the Svalin name up to the halls of power anywhere quickly enough. Something had to change.

It was around this time that word of Prince Cassian’s Lance being formed reached her. While it burned to remember such an old childhood friend, and it was outright bizarre to hear of this after hearing of his debaucheries during her time in the academy, Aria nonetheless didn’t hesitate. Her current deployment was ending anyways, and she would be reassigned soon. Thus, she was the one who reached out first, hoping to leverage her old association and childhood friendship with the Prince to secure a spot in his Lance. Nepotistic? Perhaps. Did she care? Not at all. Whatever it took. One way or another, she would find her way back to Earth. This was just the most expedient way to do so that Aria could see.


AC: ARMATUS


Role and Doctrine: While still largely resembling the chassis of a generalist Leonard stock unit, the Armatus is modified under the hood to specialize in aerial mobility and interception. Some armor was stripped to improve speed and aerodynamic performance, turning the unit into a high-speed, low-drag interceptor capable of anti-air and ground capabilities alike. Typically armed with a generalist suite of weapons, aiming to whittle down enemies at range before moving in for a decisive kill stroke up close.

Notable Armaments or Systems:
  • Aerial High-Mobility Suite: A combination of a back-mounted jump pack, several jump jets installed into the leg module, and enhanced thrusters give the Armatus a greater amount of aerial movement compared to most mechs, capable of zipping around midair for some time.
  • SPAMRAAM Missile Launcher: Smart-Propelled Advanced Medium-Range Air-to-Armor Missiles. Designed for saturation fire to overwhelm enemy point defense, the SPAMRAAM fires a barrage of micro missiles per salvo. While the penetrative and explosive power of each are minimal on their own, their combined effect when enough missiles overwhelm enemy defenses are comparable to heavier payloads.
  • Skyeye Targeting Suite: An upgraded FCS and sensors. Enables a wide-range multi-lock and enhances target lock capabilities to a medium degree.


Known Limitations or Vulnerabilities:
  • Stripped Armor: While not near the extreme of a true glass cannon, the Armatus still had enough of its armor plating removed to accommodate its jump jets that its defensive capabilities are below that of a standard model of its make. In a prolonged or cramped fight, this will prove to be an issue.
  • Off The Shelf: While customized to a degree, the Armatus’s profile is still obviously that of a moderately common Leonard unit. Thus, its general capabilities are still easily able to be estimated.
  • Specs Restricted: Outside of its exceptional mobility, the Armatus bears no other distinguishing characteristics. The weight limit and energy load required to maintain its speed and boost capability limit it to using average weaponry besides the SPAMRAAMs. It would take excessive fine-tuning and likely an internal overhaul to accommodate a hypothetical engine refit that would solve these issues, as the Leonard’s stock engine is only barely keeping up with the demands the unit is placing on it.

@Bentus Question: are mechs flight and/or zero-G capable in this setting? Or is it largely ground-based warfare? Assuming the latter based on the inspirations, but just wanted to make sure.
Missed the intcheck, but expressing interest. Will cobble a character up soon.
Ranbu no Izayoi


Izayoi sat. She listened. When she had the opportunity to get a word in edgewise, she acted. She remained where she sat, putting her sword in her lap. The blade left its sheath. She moved...

...and bonked Rudolf on the head with the scabbard.

"Foolish boy." She sighed, returning blade to sheath and both to her sash and sitting back down. "That was for putting yourself so horribly at risk with such an ill-thought out decision." The Mystrel intoned, looking and sounding more concerned for Rudolf than anything else. "I cannot condemn its utility, especially after saving several of our lives repeatedly. I can only tell you to keep your own well-being in mind with further uses of the demon's strength."

A few more moments passed, with Izayoi seemingly having nothing more to say regarding the matter.

"Now, dinner, anyone?"

Salvator Rasch


"Alice! Damn it!" Salvator cursed as the other voidhanger in the squad took a nasty hit, King reporting a suit breach. Even if the station had breathable atmosphere, he didn't trust any prolonged exposure with all of the etheric interference in the area. Probably the third worst possible situation to have a suit breach, outside of zero-G and anywhere with a confirmed toxic atmosphere.

The firefight ended soon enough, and Salvator turned to run diagnostics on Alice. Fortunately, Echo was already handling triage, so he simply let the matter be, turning his attention back to the situation at hand. King's mouthed, lip-read comment was met with a nod of understanding and battle-cant handsign in the affirmative before they resumed vocal communications.

"Harvest, Rasch. Requesting ETA on our end and yours based on projected paths. How much further do we have left to go? Over." He queryed up across the combined comms before switching back to the team's private channel. Or as private as it could be considering their support team.

"Squad, Rasch. Double check your suits and seals, report any further breaches and patch them up ASAP. In any case, agreed with Alice. I'm sensing some faint ethereal traces as well, but nothing concrete. All units, advance slowly. Scan anything out of place, and keep the rest of the squad in the loop. King, I want you on point. Echo, endoform on rear support."

Salvator caught King's gaze, signing the battle-cant for caution. Even without the construct's near-immunity to ethereal phenomena, it had proved to have a level enough head on its shoulders to not go guns blazing at the first twitch of movement. Unlike quite possibly half the squad.
Ranbu no Izayoi


"Nobody likes a heckler, child!" Ferdiad jeered right back at Rudolf's provocations as it bore down on him with its scythe, pressing harder in an attempt to break through the lock. As Rudolf wrenched the scythe aside and slammed a boot into Ferdiad's gut, the demon found itself narrowly evading the following retaliatory blows, even as its gaze honed in on its opponent.

"And yet...why does your presence feel ever so familiar?" It mused, finally bringing the haft of its scythe around to parry a pair of strikes, its gaze narrowing. "You seem a relatively dull fellow, but still..." Its eyes gleamed a predatory gold, face breaking out into a smile. "Something about you makes me want to cajole you along, ever so much-"

"Fira!"

Miina's cast blindsided Ferdiad, who found itself engulfed in a blaze of flame for a moment. A twirl of its scythe dissipated the embers as its gaze turned back towards the caster. "Ah, yes, yes! How could I forget what I'd originally dove into your ranks to do? Here, kitty, kittyyy~" It reached out, but before Ferdiad could wring Miina's neck, Galahad's halberd toss pierced into the dome of shadow, embedding itself into the artificial ceiling as cracks began to show, rays of light falling directly on Ferdiad.

"GAH! How dare-" Chisato's flaming kunai detonated on impact with its chest, followed by Esben and Eliane's pincer attack with their blades. Wounded and very likely weakened, Ferdiad staggered back, spluttering in disbelief as it started to right itself...

"Ei!" Izayoi screamed a kiai to center herself as she barreled into Ferdiad from the side, a whirling slash carving a deep gash across its chest as the samurai planted a hand into the ground to slow her slide, rejoining the rest of the party.

"Very well, then!" No longer did Ferdiad have any trace of amusement in its tone. Batlike wings erupted from its back as it waved its hand, the dome of shadow repairing itself and dislodging Galahad's polearm down to the ground. "If you so wish to hurry up the show, then who am I to deny mine audience?" The gloom within the dome intensified, the shadows growing ever more foreboding. Additional spikes emerged from Ferdiad's body as its scythe grew in length. "Welcome all, to curtain call-"

And then, all of a sudden, Ferdiad froze, the demon's head tilting as if listening to a call unheard. For a brief moment, the situation remained in deadlock, until the demon snapped its fingers, the dome dissipating as Ferdiad itself began to melt down into the shadows cast by the ruins of Lunaris, its transformation reverting in an instant.

"What luck, what joyous fortune for you!" The threatening joviality had returned to Ferdiad's tone, the jongleur giving a devil's grin as it sunk into the earth. "None among us shall be ejected from this mortal coil today, for my patron calls! Farewell, my audience, adieu! I've yet more pliant targets to terrorize!" And with a final laugh, Ferdiad sunk into the shadows completely, disappearing from anyone's senses and leaving the Warriors of Light alone in the fading afternoon sun.

___

That evening, they'd gotten well clear of Lunaris's ruins by the time they'd made camp in a clearing, a pot of vegetable soup and a pan of flatbread heating over a fire. With dinner on the way, Izayoi turned her eyes upon Rudolf, in a moment he had to have been sure was coming.

"Now that we've settled in, perhaps you'd like to begin what you were going to say during the day before we were interrupted by the bloody clown?"
Akaishi Azumi

Location: Gateway
Skills/Items Used: None


"Alright, that's enough fucking Sekiro for the day! Let's wrap up with supas~" Azumi laughed as she set her controller down, toggling the scene on her OBS recording to her usual background as she leaned back in her chair. She muted her microphone for a second as she took a swig of energy drink from the can on her desk, spinning around briefly. Another good fucking haul today: decent chunk of subs and donos to keep her bank account in the black for a good long while to come. And wasn't that what mattered? The more she took in, the more she wouldn't have to go to college, after all~

"Mmmkay, how's about we get started then? I can't wait to see which supa from you absolute freaks makes me want to commit the final yab today~" A brief, audible cackle. She was playing it up a bit: most of them weren't that bad. Just the usual crowd of other NEETs, with some in on the bit (if it was even really a bit at this point) and some taking it as permission to go all in. And even that wasn't too bad compared to some of the shit she'd looked up for funsies when she was younger.

"Pochiko, thank for the supa-" She paused, twitching as some sort of light came up in the corner of her vision. And then came the feeling of falling. And the vertigo. When Azumi opened her eyes, it was to the sight of straight out of isekai, if isekai involved demented little twisted creatures and angels like it was some sort of creature collector.

"Ah...huh...?" Azumi blinked, still rather dazed and confused from the sudden change in scenery. She took in the angel's words, what everyone else around her was saying, thought about it all for a second, and came to a conclusion:

"Ohhhh my god, people are gonna think I faked disappearing in the middle of stream for attention!" She groaned, hands clutching her head in frustration. "I'm gonna end up on the fucking hate threads! Shit, shit, shit, I'm so cooked!"

___

Vemmon


WARNING: DAMAGE CRITICAL. DEVOLUTION.BAT ENGAGED.
LOAD ERROR: FILEPATH CORRUPTED.
DEVOLUTION SEQUENCE CANNOT BE CONTINUED SAFELY.
AUTOREPAIR INITIATED.


Where was it? Who was it? The creature stirred briefly, seeing little through a haze of pain. Whatever was going on, it knew that this situation should not be.

ERROR: PROCESS HALTED.
MANUAL OVERRIDE ACTIVATED. DEVOLUTION ENGAGING.

ERROR: INCOMPATIBLE FORM SELECTED. DEVOLUTION TO GREY.MON ABORTED.
ERROR: INCOMPATIBLE FORM SELECTED. DEVOLUTION TO VEE.MON ABORTED.


It managed to lift its head only slightly as it felt something around it. Other...presences? It couldn't tell.

WARNING: FILEPATH CORRUPTED. DEVOLUTION TO...&*#!$.MON ABORTED.

"Graugh...mrgr..." It tried to open its mouth. To engage text-to-speech. What came out was a jumble of mishmash. What was it even communicating for? What was there to say?

COMPATIBLE FORM LOADED. DEVOLUTION TO VEM.MON INITIATED.

The light faded, and what emerged was a horrifically scarred purple lizard-thing, twitching and writhing on the ground as data leaked from azure gashes in its body. If something wasn't done soon, it would suffer the same fate that had just befallen the other poor wretch Dominimon had given final mercy to.
Ranbu no Izayoi


Izayoi's blade cleared its sheathe from the moment Ferdiad stopped talking, a low whirl slashing at any grasping hands around her. Rudolf and Miina's proclamations had her charging forward, bringing her blade around in whirling strikes to keep Ferdiad occupied while her much younger cousin, bordering on niece in terms of age, readied her Dispel.

Being the only one insane enough to engage the daywalking demon in melee combat from the moment it started the battle, Izayoi went toe-to-toe with Ferdiad for several strokes before the latter slammed the butt of its scythe into her gut, sending her tumbling back across the ground.

"We had best hear an explanation after this thing is banished, boy!" Izayoi called out to Rudolf, though with no true heat in her voice for him: just exasperation.

Meanwhile, Ferdiad simply laughed at Rudolf's attempt at provocation, continuing to hover in midair, so confident it was in itself.

"Trying to interrupt the pierrot upon its own stage? How rude of you! Perhaps I ought to-" Whatever Ferdiad had left to say was cut off by the dual explosions originating from Eliane and Chisato (with Esben's support), bathing it in a wave of shrapnel and flame. When the dust cleared, the jester emerged, rattled, but not unbroken. At least until Miina got her hands upon it. Her Dispel did much to eradicate Ferdiad's component aether, forcing it to retreat into the light, where it screeched in agony for a moment until composing itself.

"Oh, ho ho! Not mere pawns and vermin, you lot! Perhaps fit to sup at the table, even!" The clown cackled, slashing repeatedly with its scythe to form waves of darkened aether that flew towards the Kirins. Izayoi leapt over the ones targeted at her, closing the distance with Ferdiad once more to lock her katana against the blade of its scythe.

"Begone, clown! Are you so arrogant to believe you can defeat us, so obviously weakened as you are?"

"Perhaps, perhaps not~" Ferdiad tutted, backstepping away from a series of cleaves that left cuts upon its arms. "But I see I shall have to try ever so much more against the likes of you! How about it, then?" It spread its arms out wide, demonic madness emanating from its gaze. "Stay around for the show, for it's only just begun!"

A dome of shadow erupted around the battlefield, engulfing every combatant within it. No longer hampered by light, Ferdiad surged forward, disappearing in the blink of an eye and reappearing to rip at Miina with its scythe and tear Chisato with its claws, having identified them as having done the most damage to it previously.
Kayliss Lambert


"Take that up with your father." Kayliss waved off Rudolf's attempt at a biting comment. "Anything he's told you is on him alone. Though it's nice to see you've grown up well enough. As for the crystal, you'd be correct. I've already been informed of your goals, and there's been no chance to confirm the Wind Crystal's status ever since we've known. For what it's worth, the last inspection was about six months ago, and there seemed to have been no issues."

She turned to Eliane next, her expression falling into a slightly sympathetic look. "Fortunately for everyone involved, Lord Silvain is outside of Solitude and active, yes. By now, he'll be on his way to Falcon's Nest as well. I'll try to arrange matters so that everyone we need will be within the walls by the time you arrive, but you know how weather and poor luck can delay things."

Once everyone was finished and questions concluded, Kayliss rose from her seat.

"Regardless, it was good to put faces to all the names finally. Try to stay intact and combat-capable. And keep an eye out for Loki. If at all possible, I'll handle that matter. But who knows? Cadmon, take better care of yourself. You're looking almost as decrepit as Istvan these days." Without any further ado, she drew her hood up and took her leave, leaving the Kirins to adjourn for the night and finish their preparations.

___

The next day, they were well on their way to leaving Demet territory, having been seen off by Cadmon at the castle gates. It was nearly noon by the time the Kirins and their caravan reached the ruins of Lunaris. Ancient, dilapidated stone buildings littered the landscape before them, with a single main structure in the center.

Rudolf felt it. His passenger knew the familiar, frenetic buzz of umbral aether, shadows coalescing in front of the party. A wicked scythe,, emerged from the gloom first, followed by what appeared to be a twisted, demonic jongleur, taller than even the most prodigious of Skaellers, its head adorned with curved horns.

"My, my. What have we here? I thought I sensed something familiar, but all I see before me are uninvited guests. And yet..." Its gaze passed over the group in an instant, searching. It swept back and forth, before its shoulders came up in an exaggerated shrug. "Oh, no matter. Perhaps I was wrong. But...shall I simply apologize for startling you and let you pass?" The abyssal jester laughed, lazily twirling its scythe. "Nay, I will have my amusement before retreating to the dark below. Blood and aether are the least you can repay me in for drawing me out into accursed light! Come, my audience! Know that you face Ferdiad, for the performance begins!"

And with a cackle, it slammed the butt of its scythe into the dirt, grasping hands of black aether clawing up from the ground at lightning speed to grapple and slash at the Kirins.

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