shylarah

Carpe Noctem: Seize the Night (A Mixed-Genre RP about Dreamscapes)

@gohKamikaze *facepalm* how did I lose this thread?! I'm such a derp. x.x Right. I'm still pretty worried about Alys doing...well, /nothing/ during the day. *fusses* Also she feels like an echo of Kelpie. I'd feel awful for dropping after letting you think I was in for sure, though, and I was looking forward to playing with Gowi...so I'm around, I guess, but not certain. ^.^;;

Fae Courtis: The Wylde Hunt (Reboot)

@LadyRunic

Falk: *casually plotting to take over the entire land of the fey, or at least the unseelie, and have his hubby rule the seelie*

Sini: See, I told you he was plotting -- and that he sought dominion over all.

Max: but he had the best interests--

Sini: That's beside the point!

Oh, a note. My preference is that Max and Lei have been deposited somewhere. ...Perhaps fall, given that the kiddie is there, and Max is a healer and adores children? He was going to be a pediatrician, after all. And I thought we had nebulous plans for the two to meet.

Although. It doesn't seem like anyone will ever age the little dear now. A pity~ ...I'm sure we can think of sometihgn.

The Rutherford Organization: A WW2-era Occult Investigations RP(NO LONGER ACCEPTING NEWCOMERS)

@DepressedSoviet My CS is like 75% done. *wheeze* I'm also 99% better, though still not able to sing. =/ Trying to tone a character back when she spent a three year campaign (and 3 or more days a week!) learning new things is not easy. x.x *kicks her* And she doesn't want to let go of any of them. T.T!

Roleplayerguild and mental health

@Buddha it's easier to be open about a lot of issues online because of the additional degree of separation. This can be from relationship issues to mental issues. Yes, there are people who assume because they exhibit some of the outward symptoms that they have the illness, but I believe most of the ones I've actually talked to were officially diagnosed in some capacity, due to specific things that were mentioned.

The matter of going undiagnosed is usually because the person does not know they have the condition, even though they may be aware of the symptoms. Self diagnosis may follow this. But it may be that they don't realize their issues are particularly unusual, or they simply don't wish to acknowledge it. By the very nature of not acknowledging the issue, that person is not going to discuss it. It is only those who are aware of the issue and to some degree accept it that will say they have a mental illness -- well, aside from self diagnosers and attention-seekers.

Rp and video games do focus on the other, but they also deal with very real social concepts, when done well. And in the case of rp, interaction with the group is beneficial. Social interaction is less an escape if the illness involves social matters -- and I'd argue this includes depression. If you're doing something at seriously involves the issue and not completely neglecting it, that's actually close to working on it, or at least maintaining management. You keep from having to go on a serious diet by eating reasonably and exercising regularly. So going on a walk und a mall with a friend is socializing, having fun, /and/ it doesn't count as ignoring your health.

Medication doesn't...it's a bit more complicated than just "take this and be happy". It's more like how allergy meds get rid of the fog from allergies and allow a full spectrum of function. I can't put it into words very well, but depression isn't sadness, nor is happiness the opposite (nor the solution).

My first diagnosis was ADHD, in first grade. And it wasn't merely a matter of not sitting still. Indeed, I would sit wuietly in my room for hours, reading or making up stories with my toys. However, if I was bored or unengaged -- such as in school, where I swiftly mastered the material and was not permitted to constantly interject -- I did not. I'm not 100% certain I have ADHD, as my diagnoses have changed over the years multiple times. I believe at one point ADHD was removed, but I think it was recently re-added, combined with depression, instead of bipolarity.

Whether rp is an effective coping skill depends on the person. A lot of people say, for example, to do a little cleaning every day, so it's not overwhelming. But just dusting or just sweeping is equally stressful to me as scrubbing the entire kitchen from ceiling to floor. So breaking it up is actually counterproductive, in my case. I remember having a few other examples like this, where the general advice is useless and actually hurts, in my case. This means that it's less the rp and more the actively ignoring the issue that causes breakdowns or explosions. ...in addition to trying and failing, of course.

I will also say that simply accepting that there's an issue is not sufficient. It is a step in a process that generally spans a lifetime. Mental illness is a continuing issue, and so handling it is necessary long-term.

Roleplayerguild and mental health

I wish to preface this by saying I was first diagnosed with mental illness in first grade, and while my diagnoses have changed over the years (I'm now a few years shy of thirty) mental illness has always played at least a minor role in my life.

One reason why diagnoses are incorrect, or change, is because this is still very much an emerging field. You can look at someone missing a limb and go "yeah, you're definitely missing a limb". Not so easy to look at a brain and say "yeah, you're wired completely differently." ...Actually not so easy to look at a brain at all, but that's another matter. Additionally, mindset, belief, and a million other factors affect manifestation of such things, as well as the efficacy of treatment. Placebo effect, or even possibly a reverse (not certain on that one).

Characters with difficulties are characters people enjoy. It's no fun seeing a character that doesn't struggle. It might not be a mental struggle, but the difficulties of those that deal with mental illness and those around them do give a greater insight into struggles in general, even as breaking a leg or handling a chronic illness might. However, since mental illnesses tend to affect the mind more directly, I think it might be a little more direct in its effects. *shrug* Possibly not. But because a lot of the affected appear normal at first, it's much easier to pretend to be normal -- and this gives insight into the troubles of a character struggling with something else, like perhaps a personal dilemma.

I would not say that mental illness automatically makes people more creative. And I do agree that there is not really a single norm for minds. Nor is mental illness somehow a bigger problem than so many other things in life. Everyone has problems of one sort or another. Self diagnosis is bogus, in my opinion, and medication is not a replacement for effort, coping skills, or control. It is merely an aid. I see a noticeable difference in whether or not I am able to maintain focus, and how hard I have to work at it, when I do not take my medication. There's also a marked difference in my mood. I should note that I come across as pretty bubbly most of the time, but that it has always felt natural to be so. I am on a mood stabilizer, and without it I consistently feel listless and weighed down. I was actually /not/ on it for a while a few months ago, and it was pretty awful. People who don't produce the right amounts of insulin take medication. If my brain doesn't produce chemicals in the right quantity to function reasonably, I don't see medication for that as much different than a diabetic's insulin. It's just a lot harder to pinpoint and sort out.

I feel, in the end, that most rpers are escaping in one fashion or another. I'd argue that writing and reading are similar escapes. Video games too, actually -- anything other than dealing with the people and world around you. There's escapes irl too, of course, but essentially anything where you can set your current circumstances aside is technically an escape. This does not mean it's a bad thing; far from it. The world would be a far darker place without the stories created by those who escape their life, if only briefly. And it doesn't have to be the implied "never deals with real life" of the word "escapism". I feel some escaping is healthy. I mean, when you're arguing with someone, might you take a step back and go calm down? That right there is stepping away from the current situation for a while. And like any other hobby, rp can be beneficial, exercising useful skills and easing stress.

There's some concern about the impersonal nature of online communication, but as people are more and more connected via the internet, I wouldn't say it completely lacks the intricate social component of face-to-face relationships. It's merely another form of interaction, and people can be just as close online as they can irl in many ways (though I'm still waiting for a way to hug long-distance. And send food, we need to be able to send food.) And because the internet allows a person to get in touch with a wider network of people, support communities for people in various groups that might not have a large concentration in their physical area are far easier to find online. It can even lend a degree of anonymity, in certain cases, or facilitate sharing by people who have difficulty in person. That component does support the impersonal argument, but again, I think it's not lacking but merely different.

It does seem to be true that a significant number of rpers, or even people on various online sites, have some sort of mental illness. There's also a significant number with chronic physical illnesses that interfere with their irl lives. I think that social anxiety, depression, and various other mental difficulties lend themselves better to online interaction than physical, where the "average" person might spend more hours out and about. Before staying home meant staying away from people. It no longer does, and socializing online can fill a portion the need for human interaction without many of the pressures of seeing people in person. Since the ones that don't want any interaction are likely not going to be interacting online, the medium tends to naturally separate the different groups. Also, oddly enough, it seems that a lot of the people who are the least social in person are the most social online, perhaps because we make up the difference of our interaction quota digitally.

RP, in and of itself, is not unhealthy. Video games and reading are not unhealthy. But anything that has an overall negative impact on a person's life should be noted and moderated accordingly. I'm not going to give up ice cream because eating it makes me gain weight. But I'm certainly not going to have it every day, either. In the end, what's healthy varies from person to person. If someone is escaping in rp to the point where they do not handle necessary aspects of life, this is unhealthy. The same is true for someone who skips taking care of things to go to parties. In the end, it's a matter of personal circumstances and degree. The situation you presented, @Buddha, "escaping at any chance", I would call unhealthy in that it actively avoids necessary activities. But if it's "escaping as a coping mechanism so they have the spoons to handle irl difficulties better", this would be a positive. I myself have done -- still do -- the latter. I find rp to be a major way to unwind. I probably do tip over a little into the unhealthy area, but if I wasn't rping I would be escaping in books, sleep, or just going out and ignoring the things that I'm avoiding. ^.^;; ...All of which I also do, so it's not the rp that's the issue. It's the ignoring part. *eyes her kitchen floor with a sigh*

I should point out that rp is not the only instance where you play as someone else. Video games allow it as well -- as does tabletop rp, in certain circumstances, though it depends on how story-oriented your group is. I've also done written rp in person, though it's usually far faster to type than to write. Also easier to keep track of. So really it comes down to what a person is seeking from rping. In my case, it's a small part escape, but a large part creativity, mental exercise, interaction, and amusement.

The stereotype is people who rp to avoid reality and do nothing else. The stereotype is unhealthy, but the stereotype is largely inaccurate. Figure out what's healthy for you. <3

Fire and Ice: The Ghoul Wars

@TheMinorFall

She still had questions for Ketsuoana. She had questions /about/ him. But it wasn't the time, and the young woman stayed quiet as he and Tsitua spoke. It seemed they knew each other well. She knew even before Cain stepped into view that he too was present. The way he pulled at her was no longer as strong, after that first encounter, the same as with Tsitua. But where Nunque had been /knowing/, a connection, the warp and weft of time, and Tsitua was potential and stability, the unexpressive man in the mask was something else. She couldn't place it, and that bothered her. There were so many unanswered questions.

The others left. Ketsuoana simply vanished. One moment he was there, and then somehow he was not. And though he was close to blinding, somehow she'd not noticed his departure. Who exactly was he? She shook her head, and set the questions aside as the man who'd brought her into this apologized.

Amuné looked at him in silence for a long moment. "There's no need to apologize to me for that," she said at last, looking away. "...Mae told me a little more. Not much -- barely anything, really. But it was enough." Her eyes stayed on the stars, searching for familiar patterns. Even the deepest wilderness of the planet below could not reveal so many. She'd had a dream once, as a little girl. It had been back before things went wrong, but she still remembered it clearly. The stars were falling from the sky to burn out around her as they hit the ground. One had seemed to be coming right towards her, but instead of being frightened, she had been amazed, reaching her hands out to catch it, even though it was so bright that it seemed to be more likely to swallow her up in fiery light. She'd never figured out what it meant, or if it was just a dream. Still, the sense of wonder was something she associated with stargazing, even now.

"I'm not her, Tsitua," the Seer said softly. "I can't replace her, and I don't want to. Trying would only hurt everyone. She was special, and will always be so. Nor could you replace the father I once had. Bonds forged are lasting, and they connect us even beyond death." A flicker of a sad smile crossed the young woman's face, and she dropped her head. "...No matter how twisted they might have become." Her father's face, blurred by a decade and a half of separation, crossed her memory. For all that she blamed him for his errors, for his suspicion, for how he had given her up, he would always be her father. Some things did not change.

She sighed, and lifted her gaze again, seeking out Tsitua's reflection in the glass. "I would guess you've heard about what happened by now from Cain. All of it." Amuné watched long enough to see his nod of confirmation before focusing again on the stars. "Then you know lives were lost. Some of them people I knew." She took a deep breath, bracing herself for what was coming. "Do you happen to know their names?" She exhaled, slow but on the shaky side, when he replied. Two names. Both familiar. One a stab through the heart. "Thank you." The young lady closed her eyes and let her forehead rest against the window. "As they were in life, so may they be remembered in death." The statement bordered on religious in tone, but she'd be quick to deny it.

Though some had escaped her earlier, it was now that the tears began in earnest, coursing silently down her cheeks. "That's what I Saw, earlier. You sensed it, I know you did. Right before the spar." Amuné's voice was very soft, and uneven. "I Saw it, and I knew. Not -- not precisely who. I didn't actually See Bart. There were a couple others it might've been. But it was always Zane." She crossed her arms tightly across her chest, as if to give herself a hug, and turned to lean her back against the window. "I knew, and I could do nothing about it. Couldn't even say anything." A brief and bitter laugh escaped her, more a huff of breath through her nose than anything else. "That's the worst -- when I know, but I know saying something will make it worse. And this is only the beginning."

A few deep breaths, and the girl wrestled her emotions under some semblance of control, and reinforced her mental barriers where they had weakened. She dashed the tears from her eyes. More would come later; grieving was a process, and it took time. "He thinks he can kill people I care about, that threatening my loved ones will make me submit?" Her mouth twisted into a grim smile. "He's wrong. When he comes for me, I want to be able to crush him. I'm not a tool. If it's a fight he wants, then he's got it." The Seer looked over at Tsitua, her grey eyes meeting his without reservation. "I'm in. Whatever it takes, he doesn't win. Not this time."

Fire and Ice: The Ghoul Wars

Right, gonna make a slight assumption about a confirmation from Tsitua so I can keep going.

Fae Courtis: The Wylde Hunt (Reboot)

@FallenTrinity ...um? So...*tilt head* It was coded wrong?

Fae Courtis: The Wylde Hunt (Reboot)

@FallenTrinity@LadyRunic It was never specifically covered thus far, so I think people sorta formed their own ideas.

...I get the idea being used for his char. It's not the same concept as used for mine, and since they're not the same species I think I'm best off not trying to reconcile the two. Different species different growth rates. ^.^; So yep, we coo~

Dude, rule #1 of video games. Save early, save often. The corollary of this is, when possible, don't save over an old save until you're sure you don't need it anymore. In games where I can have as many saves as I want, I will frequently have ten, twenty, even thirty save files.

Of course the fun part is figuring which one is the right one when I find out I screwed up major. ^.^;;

Heroes of Beacon - the Next Chapter

@PyroDash888 Pretty good! Wrote a new song. And the chorus of another. Levelled up in art! Including noses~ I am inordinately proud of this. Um~ visited family in Chicago (shy is from Chi-town, yes she is!) I'm now in a D&D game, one of my rp chars just got engaged, and another lost his hand. ^.^;; Oh, and Fallen London is amazing. That's all I'll say unless you ask.