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Recent Statuses

3 mos ago
Current I can taste the rainbow! Wait no...it's just blood.
3 likes
2 yrs ago
Daylight Saving Times are a conspiracy to sell analgesics and coffee
3 likes
2 yrs ago
My milkshake brings all boys to the yard... good thing I planted mines.
8 likes
2 yrs ago
...Good lord, when was the las time I updated this?
4 yrs ago
BERSERK LIVES
5 likes

Bio

I run on GMT+1 Schedule.

And coffee.

Most Recent Posts

@Ravion the Red

"Wonderful." Bug said. "More meatheads...like that sloppy husky of a woman that accosted me when I was having my sweet time dealing with senior Ava and that lily of the valley named Elora. Bit frightful that one, but she has an interesting approach to things." Bug continued to his walk alongside Arrish. "Like the actual goddess Minerva, a stuck up one who plagued men with inoportune manners." Bug would admit. "But alright, we will get this ape out of prison. It's a small price for survival. As long as he doesn't want to be the squad leader...It doesn't strike me as someone particularly apt to do so."

He sighed. "I'm trying to play the card game for survival with far too few good cards. Lead on then, a little further networking won't hurt." He paused for a second. "Maybe that one gearhead who was all eager to get his hands on frames would be a decent choice. Those types hold little ambition or reckless thoughts besides modding machines."
@Ravion the Red
Bug was lost in thought when an ambush came from nowhere. Offering a very unfriendly face, as if it was a lion about to rip someone's throat, he quickly composed himself when he saw the overt "display" of friendship from a fellow nobleman. Duval. He had heard of some of his exploits for the brief and tense relation he had with the Imperial family of Yatalia, so it made sense he had made through the sieve into this program. Man was a love problem on legs, but his shooting arm was decent, according to what he witnessed.

"Lord Duval, It is good to see you!" He replied with his obviously fake smile back at Duval. Silence passed, as he leant on his ear, whispering ever so slightly. "And I don't mean it ironically, you casanova wretch. We have a situation to care of, and you're one of the few ones who I have met that won't get us killed for their egos. Yeah, I know I'm one to talk. So I ask for...parley." He then withdrew and pat Duval's back smiling, but holding back a great amount of anger...which the man in front of him wasn't the source of it.
@Dezuel@Ammokkx

The Lilim stood still for a second. "No play found with the words Hamleancelot and Fuck in databanks. Likelihood of subterfuge 95%." She droned as she got ready, looking at the door."Commencing Spanking maneuver." The robotic woman said as she caught some wind-up, and with a single movement, jammed her hands in the door's hinges.

The awful sound of metal giving way past their fracture limit was heard as in one swift move, with the ease of opening a can the robotic entity pried open the door, making it fall to one side. Her eyes scanned the room. Her eyes flashed red as she locked on the target, a leg shooting way up like a cobra lunging in an stylish taekwondo-style kick, ready to crush the nasal bone of the male pilot. Except the leg stopped an inch or so away from Griff's face, and the poor pilot could count the grains of grit on her metallic heel.

"Abort. Data Center detected. Technological loss unacceptable. Recalculating." The Lilim said, still on guard. "Pilot, you are lucky. Next time, remember your reproductible capabilities are not necessary for piloting framewerks. The female child has no fault for your failings at basic laundry tasks." She eyed the female child, who seemed terrified and quickly interposed her sturdy frame between her and the undisciplined male pilot. Her unfeeling face tilted to face the girl, as she gently scooped the terrified girl on her arms with the care of a lioness scooping her cubs.

"Ultimatum: Don't talk to me and my child ever again." The combat Lilim said, as she comically hoisted the terrified Serah to one of her shoulders, as if the pilot was one third of her actual age. "There, there, the bad boy will not hurt you. This unit is SR-456, named Stella. Do you like candy?" The robot girl said in a stilted inflection as she carried Serah out of the room. "Do you require medical care or food?" She added, as she began walking away, dodging the dislodged door. And then, as if all a sudden, a question popped up.

"Where is Ritsu Kaname." Stella droned, still carrying Serah like a lost child, ocassionally throwing glances at the offender they were leaving behind.
????????

@shylarah@Dezuel

The hectic pace of the new arrivals from different ways of life and had made quite a ruckus in the hangar bay, although things seemed to be settling in a lull after the initial frenzy. Two figures, in somewhat greasy work clothes stood, sipping a couple of coffees served in plastic cups.

"Well, it seems it's calming down, Billy." One of the engineers said, as he sipped. "Or at least this part looks calm. I heard the guys at the simulator got hit with a very troublesome newbie."

Billy for the most part nodded. "Don't tempt luck. I heard about it. Bastard of the vomit-colored mech. He loves to poke around and break stuff, or so I heard. It's gonna be tough...prima donna pilots, am I right, Joe?"

"Right you are. They think theirselves they're the hottest shit, but who keeps the real game? Us. Without them they'd be nothing but a bunch of flailing brats." Joe replied bitterly.

"Speaking of pilots, who pilots this thing?" Billy said, eyeing the large figure shadowing thing. They had seen and serviced mechs but this whole thing was massive. Way pushing the limits of a superheavy mech, judging by how strained and cramped it felt in the scaffolds. A colossal titan of black steel with a hammer.

"Big...bonk? I dunno. Maybe they'll come later. There's a crate there with spare parts, I think." He said. "...Well, we need a little table to lean, isn't it?" He added, advanced towards the crate and leaning.

"Yeah, my shoulder aches after that Shiva maintenance. Expensive shit." The other engineer said, leaning too.

A faint buzzing could be heard, must have been the machinery.

Checkup Finished. Restarting Operation.

A large elegant fist shattered the top of the crate, sending splinters everywhere. Hot coffee was launched high in the air.

"AAAAAAHHH!" Both engineers screamed, clinging to eachother as they saw a figure break through the cargo crate and adjust herself. It was a large, shapely synthetic being. A lilim. Sleek black plating covered most of her body, and her synthair seemed to match the colour. If they weren't scared out of their wits, they would say the figure looked easy in the eye and perhaps motherly.

"Where is Ritsu Kaname?" The steely, robotic voice demanded.

"I DON'T KNOW! I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE IN HER OFFICE!" One of Engineers panicked, tremblingly pointing in a direction.

"Designation acquired. Thank you." The Lilim said, still with her impassive face, before her head tilted so slightly, as her mind raced with some tests.

"Distress detected." She said, as she raised two hands at the panicking engineers, softly patting their heads as her voice gained a slight tender inflection. "There, there. This unit will deal with the scary monsters." She said, unaware that she had been the source of the distress. Without more mediation, the Lilim began to walk towards the offices, with measured steps.

"What the hell was that about...Did that Lilim just...ship herself!?" Billy said, regaining his composture.

"I don't know man, we don't get paid enough for this." Joe replied. "Let's get more coffee."

"Let's." Both engineers agreed.




The Lilim walked around and around, with a pensive pace, registering and marking every corridor to navigate in her mind. Humans of all kinds stopped and looked at her. Perhaps they needed assistance in cooking meals or being tucked in beds. She however could not stop by and inquire, as a more overriding command had been issued.

The showers. She registered. A couple of humans shaking hands. No, actually this was an act of aggression. The one with more body mass, male, was exerting pressure on a female. Females were less muscular than males. Chance of damage was not negligible. She had to intervene.

She darted like a panther, closing the gap between her and the fleeing figures, and she stood outside the door, giving a last chance of surrender "Naughty protocol activated. Spanking module initiating. You have ten seconds to cease and desist."

She then paused. "Where is Ritsu Kaname?"
@Ammokkx
@Ariamis I was tinkering at the last moment, did you catch those edits?
Numero dos. Throwing stuff at the wall and see what sticks.



@Randomguy

"Oh, but nothing *prohibits me* from doing so, senior. So I will keep calling you that unless you specifically ask not to." Bug put his most polite smile as he wobbled ever so slightly. "Regarding the validity of the strategy...well, Scorched Earth *is* still a proven tactic. And If we fail in this pursue of the unknown, our last desperate tactic." Astolfo replied, seeing an opening to continue conversing with the fellow pilot, despite her calling him by his given name.

Back in Yatalia, that was extremely disrespectful, but he guessed he was trying to distance herself. He breathed deep. "I have been on a hospital bed for the good part of the year, so...a little jog won't hurt. Maybe see the greenhouse areas, meet and greet fellow pilots and perhaps seeing firsthand the scene of the...shower incident so such things never occur again. There was a...stern warning after all." Astolfo replied, still offering a smile. "I'm curious how the signs could've been mixed up."

"Alternatively, we can jump in the simulator together. I feel bad for destroying a planet and an engineer's dreams." The not-so-hidden prince replied.
@Randomguy

"Did something happen?" A second voice chimed in, a feminine voice with few inflections, which however a stark contrast with the engineer's heavy sighing. Bug turned to the new source of sound gingerly, stopping for a moment to admire the figure. Oh ho ho...what do we have here. The silent belle type. Fills the clothes really nicely, this one. Granted, she's no Lieutenant Ritsu in that regard...but I guess such a senior is a welcome sight for sore eyes. Astolfo offered a kind smile as he got up.

"Oh hello...senior." He said, as he stood up and performed a salute towards Ava. "Lieutenant Lane,sir." He knew he wasn't supposed to, and he knew it was bungling up the ranks. But well, newbie mistakes could be made, right. "Oh, wait, we're not supposed to do this anymore, are we? It is my first day after all. And you're such a known quantity. A shining star in certain circles." He admitted. There was no denying he had locked on interest on Ava even before he had met her. One of the things his life had taught was to scout potential allies. Partners. So to speak. And she was...easy on the eye too. "...But I am getting carried away, am I? I'm Astolfo Bugatti. Bug...for friends and peers. Short and concise. Nice to meet you, senior." He smiled once more. "The gentleman and I were having a conversation about...simulations. It appears I may have carried it too far a little when trying to win an unwinnable scenario. The Duvallian Folly, if I must be...precise."

"YOU BLEW UP THE PLANET!" The engineer whimpered.

"A simulated planet, friend. And thanks to that...we managed a sort of victory condition. Which is not supposed to happen." Bug replied as he raised his finger. "Excuse me for a second, senior." His eyes darted on the frazzled engineer.

"I SHOULD THROW YOU IN THE BRIG!" He exclaimed exasperated. "YOU MASS MURDERER!"

"Is it murder when we're speaking of simulated entities? Is it not the job of simulations to train and otherwise test things that would otherwise have unacceptable costs in real life? After all, you can regenerate a simulation. But you can't regenerate a human life in this hostile cosmos." Bug said. But still we must burn lives in the conflagration to just survive. He thought mentally. "Well, who knows. Maybe it is a good thing. Look at it this way... won't the next simulation version be better now that you will account this kind of possibility? If anything It would reassure me." Bug replied as the engineer stopped his whining and looked to Bug up, as if he had grown three heads and tentacles.

"...I guess." It was his sheepish reply, as the words sunk inside him like sweet, numbing poison.

"Next time, bring me something...harder to break. I'll buy you a good vintage bottle if you do manage make me yield. Thanks for looking out for us pilots, engineer..." He paused, reading his ID plaque. "Andersen."

The engineer nodded thoughtfully, as he went to work, his mind clearly racing about reports and improvements. Bug looked at the spectacle before he decided it was far too boring and face once the beauty of the redhead besides him.

"It seems I have much to learn, senior. Would you be so kind to give this junior of yours a tour of the ship? Maybe even exchange stories." Bug smiled once more. "We all have stories."

She was a redhead too. Warm like the sun, and with sparkling green eyes. Ample bosom and great beauty. Such bittersweet memories... I remember her lifeblood sprawling on the ground of my princely chamber, the stained butter knife on my hand, caked with the fat, skin and blood of her pretty neck. A bottle of poison rolled from her garments on her limp body, as if trying to get away from the wrath of the Prince. My wrath. I was merely 10, and I had already killed my first person to not be killed in a futile battle for the throne. She had been lying all along. Thinking I had been easy prey. In a sense I was. Had I not realized and snapped there and then, there would be no present. Nor future.

...Such bittersweet memories.


He thought to himself, as he awaited a reply from Ava Lane.
@Ariamis

Bug let the salute rest for a second, before nodding. "Duly noted, lieutenant." He added, hiding the hint of annoyance on his voice. So someone beat me to the promised land? Who was!? Now half my strategies are ruined. And these green haired dweebs honeyed words had an impact on the Lieutenant? How are you so weak to flattery, woman? If I had known... It was no use crying over spilt milk, and the Lieutenant had to mention him. His skill still had phantom itches from the burns and injuries suffered by the sheer power of the orbital laser they had fired upon him.

But it seemed the smug copies had gone ahead, so he excused himself. Get started? Oh I believe I will. I am in the itch of killing some ugly ass bugs now, and Cruxi virtual asses will do just fine. Bug advanced towards the hangar in strides, his grace sometimes giving way to something more primal, more aggressive. He caught up with the twins, who where discussing Kattai with what it seemed the gaudiest nerd of the entire bay.

"Good for you, I guess." He added as a quip. "Normally the Kattai system breaks dreams, frames and spines." He said, in an acerbic comeback. "And...just a heads up. I'd appreciate if you didn't touch my framewerk unless you're my assigned qualified engineer." He added, his voice seemingly hostile as he strode off.

He heard faint rustly behind a mech. Oh great, space rats now, just brilliant. He strained his eyes and saw what it looked a sobbing figure under a mech. Well, she wasn't wounded, and he was no psychologist, so he just ignored her after giving her a good luck. Pilots breaking before the first week, so fucking splendid. Are you sure you're not a royal torturer, XO Lorenzo?.

He made it past towards the simulation chambers. He had better get acquainted with what was the evaluating system from the start. Nobody seemed to be there trying to crunch a record. Well, that was good. He didn't like nosey onlookers looking at what was his game. Specially if they were the moral types. Inside a simulation...there was no morality to speak of. It was just ones and zeroes. And sometimes neural feedback.

"What's this. Unwinnable simulation? Duvallian Folly? I like the sound of that. Seems like an stress reliever." Bug said to himself as he loaded the situation.

As soon as he was inside he saw his framewerk simulated inside the bay. Good to know. But as alarms were blaring. Astolfo smirked, and turned his back on the mech, grabbing a nearby rifle. He ran on simulated legs, on simulated lungs, until he reached the cockpit.

"Hey, you're not supposed to be-" The simulated drone voice was cut short as the now inanimate simulated pilot fell to the ground, dead. The nearby soldiers thought twice, before they saw Astolfo sending the ship in direct collision course with the Cruxi mothership. Astolfo laughed cathartically. This was good shit, good, consequence-less shit. Simulations weren't real crimes, after all.

Things escalated all the way up from here. More chaos. More pieces in the simulation being broken and used on the wrong order, as chaos rained down the skies, as Astolfo felt purging the negative feelings off himself.

The end result. "Victory. 3 Human ships remaining. Cruxi Fleet Annihilated. PLANET CORE RUPTURED."

Astolfo disconnected from the simulation, and let the adrenaline flush out of his system. He was no longer along. A junior engineer was looking at him bewildered. "Wha...HOW? WHY! YOU LUNATIC! WHAT DID YOU DO?"

"I played...a simulation." Astolfo replied calmly. "It was good stuff."

The poor bullied engineer gulped, as he flickered through his pad and messages. One sender stood among them all. Professor Lorenzo.

"Simulation done. Maybe I should try the gym machines now? Or find whoever is going to sortie with me. Mingle with the pleb. Gosh. So droll. But necessary." He said to himself.

The prince breathed deep as his footsteps clacked in the cold metallic feeling of the facility. It smell to oil, cleaning products, metal, human misery and broken dreams. Not a few hours ago, he had been enjoying lobster and some fancy drink worth an entire's planet gross domestic product. Some sort...of last meal for those about to be sentenced to death. Except his had been swapped by this droll... situation. The twins that had been beside him felt...off putting for some reason. He gathered resolve, as he looked at the lieutenant.

His hand raised at his forehead, a salute respecting a superior. Something he had never done before, but never too late to ever learn it properly. "Lieutenant, sir." He said, in a calm softly, and ceremonial manner. "I have two questions. Will you personally be able to coach us in catching up, do we have to rely on our seniors, or we are on our own." Astolfo said, before not missing a heartbeat. "And... are the showering facilities mixed? I have this inkling of curiosity, lieutenant, sir."

The prince said, his expression neutral. Catch up lessons after being discharged from heavy hospitalization isn't very fun. Maybe I can find a senior with a big rack who will take pity on this poor soul and make the meantime much more bearable. The prince thought, still standing firm.
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