Avatar of Cu Chulainn

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Recent Statuses

10 mos ago
Current its been a week and i still dont feel 24...
11 mos ago
born today, dead tomorrow
1 like
11 mos ago
Barbie: a provocative piece that shows the disparity in gender roles in today's society using the representation and marketing schemes of children's toys as a medium. Oppenheimer: bomb bad ☢️ 👎
6 likes
11 mos ago
Watched the Barbie movie in all black and guyliner. Watching Oppenheimer in a pink polo tomorrow.
7 likes
12 mos ago
I hate clocking out early because the power went out. I want muh hours ffs
1 like

Bio

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???, Equipment Room, Chaldea

@Letter Bee

Those with a high IQ would likely surmise that Assassin had used his ability to change his form in order to assume the shape of a pickle. While that may be one of the funniest things one would see in their life, that was sadly not the case. There was no silly face on the other side of the pickle, for it was a normal pickle. It felt pickly, smelled pickly, and would likely taste pickly should Daniel decide to eat it. Rather than being a silly harmless prank involving a brined cucumber, what instead happened was something Daniel could possibly not foresee as the feeling of cold, sharp steel pressed against his neck.

Assassin appeared behind his Master, holding the flat end of one of his many knives against his neck. It wasn't enough to cut for sure, but it was definitely threatening. Before Daniel could react, Assassin moved with his superior speed, pulling one of his arms behind his back as he held him tightly.

"You shouldn't have come alone, kid. If you still had your command spells, you could possibly stop me from slicing your throat right now. You wouldn't have to use them to command us, either... the mere threat of them would have kept me at bay from gutting ya. How can you save the world if ya can't save yourself?"

Assassin continued to hold his blade against Daniel's neck for only a few more seconds before finally letting go, slinking back with a yawn. The knife had disappeared, and all that was left was Assassin's sly, shit-eating grin.

"When we go on the field, your best bet is to stick near one of the other Servants, unless you want another Assassin to cut you down like I would have done. You're only a liability to us now that you don't have your command spells on ya! Consider this a lesson from the man who taught the big guy how to throw down! Hah!"

With that laugh, Assassin took the pickle from Daniel's hands, taking a bite from it while walking off.

"Well, would you look at that! Those girlies Saber brought to his room last night were right! Pickles are delicious..."

And so, Assassin went off to enjoy his breakfast, paying no heed to the child he likely scarred for life. Those scars will make him tough, after all...
???, Equipment Room, Chaldea

@Letter Bee

Assassin chuckled to himself at the request of his bewildered Master. To think he allowed himself to be summoned by the most idealistic child in Chaldea... Well, it made some amount of sense given the mission, but to waste all his Command Spells for such an inconsequential reason? Assassin felt like whatever strategy they'd discuss would likely fall flat. Not like he could go up and join the conversation if he wanted to, either. After all, it seems Assassin was in quite the pickle.

Sorry kid, but that's a 'no' on both your questions. Like I said when I was summoned, I'll help Chaldea restore Human Order and all that, but I'm playing by my own rules. Ya lost the authority to tell me otherwise, anyway! Hah!

Assassin's words were as harsh as the tone of his voice, which was that of an almost comical exaggeration of a crotchety old man. However, Assassin once again spoke to Daniel, but in hushed whispers this time, ignoring the fact that the tone of his mentally projected voice would hide nothing as no one else would hear their conversation regardless.

To tell ya the truth, kid, I'm... having a bit of trouble where I'm at. Mind if you sneak on over here in the equipment room and help an old man out? You'll know it when you see it.
I'll stir up the pot and vote casual!

As Malphas drifted between the realm of life and death, he seemed overall content with the outcome bestowed upon him. Rolling with the punches was something he became accustomed to in his later years, after all. Mistakes were made, judgement was issued, and now he must live with this strange goal he has been tasked to accomplish in this new world. It wasn't something Malphas was against, either. After all, he was given a powerful blessing formed out of his wishes, a love letter to his own way of life. This Goddess wasn't half bad, either. Not exactly what he envisioned what a higher power would look like, but she was cute enough that if Malphas was otherwise unmotivated to proceed with her whims, he'd possibly solicit pictures of her feet in exchange for his service. It was a good thing Malphas already had his own goals in mind, however...

Of course, a second chance at reaching transcendence.

As the feeling of comfort was slowly replaced with the sensation of being submerged in water, Malphas did not once budge. He was, after all, used to holding his breath. There were many things Malphas had done in his life to curry on the favors of others, and... yes, exactly what you think. Mandatory swimming lessons were an important thing in his country if he wished to procure a boating license. That yacht was a fine investment, overall. Of course, it also helped that Malphas's own physique had become comparable to an Olympic athlete, so he wasn't overall bothered by the strange liquid surrounding him. That said, being released from this strange chamber was still a large relief on Malphas's part.

Making his way out of his tube, Malphas had on a soft grin, his eyes scanning the various parts of the large room they had found themselves in. He looked down at his rather drab looking clothes before noticing his pale skin. While he never was exactly concerned with getting a tan in his past life, Malphas found it strange that his skin had seemed just too flawlessly vibrant. Perhaps it's just the liquid's sheen left over on his skin? It didn't matter, either way. Malphas was confident that he was as beautiful and androgynous as he was in his past life.

Before he could completely regain his bearings, he was interrupted by two things. First, the sound of another chamber opening followed by coarse coughing. As Malphas looked towards that direction, he noticed a much larger man than him, one who had seemingly emerged from the same sort of pod he had. As he had began to speak, the second interruption had occurred. A catty woman appearing before them, almost... too catty. She had cat ears and a little cat tail waving behind her. Wait, what the fuck?

As she began to explain her situation to himself and the other man, Malphas grinned in response. There were others given similar gifts that he has! This was good, very good... It meant he had powerful allies to help him accomplish his dreams and, more importantly, leverage against them should they go against his beliefs. Clearing his throat, Malphas gestured his arm outwards in a welcoming matter.

"Rejoice, my fellow primates, for we have... Oh, my." Malphas was taken aback slightly by his new voice. It had a harmonious rhythm that he enjoyed. Malphas chuckled to himself, placing a hand over his mouth bashfully at this. "Ah, as I was saying... You both should have no fear in the coming Guardian, for I, Malphas, have been blessed with a powerful ability that should be able to protect us all. Perhaps we should introduce ourselves firsthand and go over our gifts with each other at the very least before we proceed onward, no?"

Malphas did not want to rush things. For one, learning about everyone else's divine gifts would help in figure out how they'll operate from hereon. Perhaps they were all given the same things, or maybe a few differences? Another reason why Malphas wished to halt before they proceeded towards the doorway with the weapons scattered about specifically. It seemed like there was some sort of dangerous hazard lurking near that path, and making their way immediately towards the weapons would potentially alert that presence to their location. At the very least, it would be best they all knew what they were capable of before a mistake would get them all killed.

Lastly, Malphas wanted to try something, himself. He closed his eyes, and focused on both the connection between himself and the Goddess as well as the connection between himself and the other two gifted in the room with him. He then opened his eyes, attempting to will his magical gifts towards his eyes. It was an attempt to see if he could see anything regarding the nature of his allies using their connection to the Goddess as a focus. Malphas wondered if the things he could perceive included his allies' statistics, which was an important thing to know before he made his next move.
Ya know I'm up for it, Dankee. If things are getting full tho, I'll
keep an eye out.


I've been hoping for some sort of Kingmaker-esque roleplay without all the heavy mechanics of PF1, so this is right up my alley! Looking a bit full though, so I'm fine being denied in that case.
???, Equipment Room, Chaldea


As the Masters began to wake up and the other Servants mucked off to do whatever they do, Assassin spent most of the night taking advantage of the time he had to himself by exploring every secret nook and cranny of Chaldea that he could get access to. Invisibility and Presence Concealment were real blessings in accomplishing this, after all. Knowing all these were important later, for the time between missions. For now, this snooping around only served as good practice for his abilities. Gotta keep those old bones moving, after all.

At the moment, Assassin had decided to find a place to rest, more excited to wait for prospects of truly putting his profession into practice than getting himself in trouble. And out of all the places he chose to wait, it was in one of the storage areas, more specifically the one the Masters would have to go to in order to get themselves properly equipped for their first mission. Of course, while he was definitely there, where he was specifically was a mystery, waiting to be found out. Even if his own Master attempted to see through his vision through their connection, he would only see pitch darkness... or more accurately, dimmed steel gray.

There was indeed a surprise, a "prank" waiting for the Masters in the room, one they would not suspect... or understand, really. Those youngsters are too uninitiated for true comedy, after all. They'd have to be wiser than others of their age to truly understand Assassin's sense of humor. Of course, this surprise was not at all an act of malicious intent, but rather, something benign and harmless...

Master of Disguise: B

Laying on one of the steel tables in the equipment room was a pickle, seemingly placed there sometime last night...
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