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@dragonmancer

Sincerely, let me say one thing. FMA is only an inspiration for her backstory, her powers are nearly universally based on actual alchemical practices, just changed to give the character a bit more of flavor.

Alkahest is an actual alchemical composite, thought to exist and that has absolutely the same properties I described on my CS. It's not my creation. Just research it if you don't believe me, it's the most absolute and accurate mythological thing on my CS along with the Golems.

As for the matter of Golems, no, I don't want permanent ones, never did. They are just disposable tools, there's no need to expand them beyond their purpose. Hohenheim's Grimoire is actually named for the Maharal, the famous creator of the Golem of Prague, which is only the most famous golem of all, but mythological Jew mythology based golems work just like I described.

An accomplished alchemist that's supposed to be paired with dragons and demons that can't even complete a Magnum Opus on her own is a laughable notion, to say the least, I should say. Transmuting base metals to higher forms is supposed to be a cantrip to an alchemist that can forge the Philosopher's Stone. It's not about power, it's about concept, my CS followed a lot of the proper mythology if you care to check the right sources. Alchemy is supposed to be nebulous and vague by nature, but the Magnum Opus is one of the few things that's easy to get information to. Something as turning water into fire requiring a Philosopher's stone is ridiculous, to say the least. All you need for that, even IRL is electricity and a bit of salt, something easy to obtain for characters like those. Water is already made of hydrogen and oxygen, it already makes a pretty good fire as long as you separate it and add a single spark.

However, I'm appaled that you allowed a reality breaking ability to pass this scrutiny. You clearly must not know what reversal of entropy means.

Either way, if @TheWindel is dropping, so am I. I just suggest that you look further into your mythology books before deeming something as a mere anime/game trope. Usually, they have a base in reality that you clearly are ignoring.
@KoL More commenting on the use of Cagliostro, who is quite decidedly not a woman at all.


Oh, that I know. Just read Hohenheim's backstory. It was very well inspired by that and something also that's very easy to tell.
I'll post either later today or tomorrow.
@Dead Cruiser

I find this cast disappointingly lacking in the matter of libido and personality. Of course, I had to fix it.

I mean, one thing is writing that your character is this or that. Another is making them feel that they are this or that from their mere description. Hohenheim isn't even evil in her eyes, she's a woman of science that follows no one's rules of morality.

She may be evil from an objective standpoint, but she's humanly evil, not a caricature of rage and bloodshed. This is a whole different game since (discounting the supernatural powers) Hohenheim is the type of person that could be living in your neighborhood and you wouldn't ever know about... until it's too late.
Ok, so here's Hohenheim:

@KoL
Well it is an evil world out there. Just avoid writing anything in bad taste.


Don't worry, I'll leave the really tasty parts for your imagination. It's always funnier this way, after all. Especially when feats that would make Mengele blush in embarrassment are involved.
@dragonmancer

I've pretty much decided what I'm gonna do. It's still kinda secret but I assure you that it's really on the darker side of the evil scale.

I hope you have no qualms with tiny things like gore, rape, potential human experimentation, and assholery galore.
Pretty much the same as @TheWindel.
@Hammerman

Take my advice: Run while you can.
I'll do mine by this weekend, but don't wait on me, if you wanna have a go. I was just trying to not be too hasty with the conversation.
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