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Master Bruce male Member

Winged Freak

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Very well, where do I begin?

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.

Most Recent Posts

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
As long as we're trashing superheroes and quickly dividing lines...



This fucking guy can go right to hell. How do you turn Aquaman into an insufferable douchebag who wears a speedo and has wings on his ankles because of a "Look at me, I'm from Atlantis!" superiority complex? You create goddamn Namor The Sub-Mariner.

And Imperius Rex sounds like a highly uncomfortable sexual position.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
<Snipped quote by Master Bruce>

I have never liked Moon Knight. Ever. His comics bore me.
Also, Batman (and Superman) is overrated.


I SEE THE TINY TEXT, SIR!



Gambit, Gambit, Gambit, and fucking Gambit.


It's almost as if I knew you were going to say that.

Not because I have any personal affinity for Gambit, he's kind of a non-entity to me in terms of the X-Men, but because your undying hatred of Remy LeBeau is almost legendary.

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Hey, you never know. Someone's Silver Sable could be someone else's Moon Knight or Iron Fist. Different strokes for different folks.

Me? I like Deadpool. I've liked him even before the movie came out and made him a hot commodity. Some find him particularly annoying and wish that he would have never existed, but I'm not one of those people.

On the other hand, fuck Hank Pym. Fuck him in his "Science first!" ass, fuck him for being a wife-beating psychopath, and fuck him for perpetuating the idea that Ant-Man is in any way more interesting than The Wasp. Outside of the Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes cartoon and the MCU embittered old fart interpretation, I could literally be driven to sleep by any given scene with him in it. I am not only happy that Scott Lang is the movies' version of Ant-Man, I almost wish Pym didn't even have to be a factor, but y'know. Comic book accuracy.

There, now I'm open to attack for my selectively stupid taste in characters that favors Deadpool over one of the founding members of The Avengers.

Who else favors one character over another, more popular character or has never seen the appeal of a particular superhero?*

*Anyone who answers "Batman" is getting automatically kicked from the game, because how dare you.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Too bad Venom is getting hype for some reason.


I think most people who don't keep up with industry news assume it'll be related to Spider-Man and aren't aware of the difference between Sony's cinematic universe and Marvel's. So no matter how it looks, they think "Hey, it's Marvel! There's a good chance it'll be good!"

Which Sony is betting on, given the giant (IN ASSOCIATION WITH) Marvel (Not Studios) banner infront of every bit of footage.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
You know, I don't usually wish a hard financial failure on a film, since alot of hard work goes into making them and people are really just doing their jobs at the behest of a bunch of out-of-touch corporate figureheads.

But I hope Venom tanks hard, regardless of it's actual quality. Sony needs a swift kick in the proverbial balls regarding putting the cart before the horse on all of this nonsense, and they need their own personal "The Mummy, courtesy of Dark Universe" type of failure to realize it.

Or one of these to bankrupt them in the event that they press ahead. They've been limping ahead as Spider-Man's cinematic disease-ridden foot that needs to be amputated for far too long.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
<Snipped quote by Lord Wraith>

Oh, no. It is a very different movie from that one.


One might say a cheerleader aspect would've greatly improved that film.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
<Snipped quote by Master Bruce>

I love Spock. "To infinity and beyond!"


Excuse me, sir.

That's a Cylon.

And it's "Oh my stars and garters."
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
MFW I see people bringing up Star Wars.

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Rushed post is shitty and rushed, but it's a thing.


Tell us how you really feel.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
My modem just got fried by a thunderstorm, so I'm out of action til probably Friday.


@Lord Wraith, you better not be up to some kind of God of Thunder pranking shenanigans in real life.
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