Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Sierra
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Sierra The Dark Lord

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@Romero I like the take. I think he's sufficiently interesting as a character that I want to read more of him. I'm actually willing to slap an APPROVED on this as-is but I there are some minor criticisms I have that I want to air for your consideration.

The notion of manipulation others, particularly through mystical means, is one of those things that's in a tricky place in power level (it can be too good to the point of boring very quickly, or neutered to the ground with minimal effort). I'll allow it with the corollary that the combination of Legionnaire and chosen makes an individual uncontrollable (i.e. no controlling the other party members), though I would make note that I think excessive use of this will get boring real quick. I personally wouldn't lean on that as a main character gimmick but you very well may; your discretion.

Fire is an interesting choice of element to pair with hammers. I am of the mind there's underutilized potential there for some earthshattering abilities (bad pun intended) but if you wanna stick to fire then stick to fire. There's no real limits on the elemental aspects of aetheric powers.

If you were to tone back/rework the manipulation/enslavement, I think your character would actually end up underpowered. If that's something you pursue in a revision, then that's something you should think about. Now that said, I also said I'd consider this APPROVED as-is and any revision pass is ultimately optional. I'd encourage it, but these are ultimately my thoughts on the character not yours. Proceed as you see fit.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Romero
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@Sierra I'm glad you like the take, I had come up with a few characters, but the unknowingly corrupted holy man was the one that seemed the most fun to play.

In terms of the manipulation, I envisioned it as having two effects. The first being short bursts of will, the kind of effect that would only last a few seconds for most NPC's, something like "Drop it" or questions like "Who do you work for?" kind of thing. And the other being able to 'preach' and lean others towards his own opinion, encouraging people to join him etc. But not forcefully.

I did get caught up with what combat abilities to give him. Lightning seemed too cliche, but I like the idea of adapting it more towards earth than fire, mainly making them hit like a ton of bricks, and be able to break the ground etc. I'll think about it.

I'll hold off on moving the sheet across to Characters tab while I make some tweaks, but thanks for the go-ahead.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Kalmar
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Have all the Legionnaire spots been taken?
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Kalmar
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.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Sierra
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@Not Fishing So I waited a good while and read through it a few times before writing this feedback, but you already knew that would be the case. I couldn't quite shake the reservation about adding yet another 'heir denied' character to the pile (as I checked the Characters tab and we already have two). I grappled with the idea of letting it slide for a long while and it's honestly kind of a frustrating decision that feels bad having to make (but nobody said being GM was easy). As I said earlier I normally am not firm regarding backstories, however I cannot shake the concern that adding a third character of the same backstory archetype dilutes the value of the trope for all three of them. I think both your main character and your Legionnaire suffer from this same problem in fact.

The other problem I have giving it a thorough evaluation is that I get the feeling of genericism. If I had to guess, you hammered out the first idea you had in twenty minutes for the sake of getting it done. It doesn't feel like there was any passion put into it at all. That can suggest a number of things, though I cannot know which specifically applies in this instance. Perhaps you're just throwing your name in the hat for the sake of having a fantasy RP in your current portfolio - which I would take issue with given the limited slot nature of this RP - or you're not writing a character you're really passionate about creating and playing, which I would consider a disservice to yourself more than anything that won't lead to an enjoyable experience.

I would like to see another pass on the backstory work before I sign off on it. I also feel like a complete change in direction is not out of character, but I can't read your thought process beyond that which you post openly. I can only infer from what's written. All of that said, if you absolutely have your heart set on this version, come talk to me about it on the Discord or in PMs.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Sierra
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@Not Fishing The editing of a post with a completely different CS is screwing with my chronology man. :P

There's some overlap going on with some sheets I've read (but I've read like 16 sheets at this point so they do blur together and I lose track of what's active and what's not) I'm gonna go ahead and say yes on this version. I really like what you did with Beric. Cassius is where most of the overlap I noticed is but overall I think its inconsequential. I think it will actually make for an interesting common ground to a few other characters. I think your chosen abilities are an oddball that I enjoyed. Their battle potential isn't immediately obvious but I can see you going full on Loki on people.

I do hope you and one of our existing characters go heavily into the archery skillset with your power scaling though (the characters will develop abilities and ramp up in power as we go ... because you will have to in order to survive). We don't have nearly enough people with ranged capability. *hint hint*
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by BurningCold
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@Sierra Well technically, Katerina's magics can be cast from afar. In Beoris' time, whole cities could fall as he weaved curses from a safe distance.

She's a long way from that, though.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Sierra
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Those of you who I've talked to or are otherwise following the Discord know this was coming. Thus for you people this is mostly just a formality. For those who don't yet know what's going on, this is a mass tag for everyone playing.

@Whoami @Drunken Conquistador @Isotope @BurningCold @Silver Carrot @Templar Knight @Romero @Not Fishing

This is a quick check in for everyone since we've been having some slow pacing and people with writer's block, etc. If you're still here and still good to go, just say hi here in the thread. If you're not good to go for whatever reason, that's fine too. I won't hold it against you if anyone feels the need to bow out. If there's anyone who doesn't respond to this in a somewhat timely manner (lets say within 7 days) then I'm gonna treat it like a no-show.

I'll also take a moment to give a big Thank You to everyone still with us. You are all appreciated.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Silver Carrot
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Silver Carrot Wow I've been here a while

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@Sierra

I'm still here, and I'll try and post soon.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Romero
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@Sierra Also still here
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by BurningCold
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@Sierra Hellooooo
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Drunken Conquistador
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@Sierra

Still here.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Whoami
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Whoami All things atmospheric...

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Here as well.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Kalmar
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Just popping in to confirm that I exist.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Templar Knight
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Apologies on my silence. I'm here. @Sierra
Hidden 5 yrs ago Post by Sierra
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Greetings to everyone still with me. I have some formalities to get to but first a few words.

Thank you to everyone who has been with us through to this point, and to those who were only with us for a time. It has been my genuine pleasure to enjoy and tell these stories with everyone. ¬¬If you are reading this and suspecting that this is a patronizing lead-up to a grim announcement, you are unfortunately not wrong. I spoke multiple times throughout this roleplay about “the inexorable march of progress” without really understanding how difficult it would come to be to maintain. Inexorable, it ultimately was not. It has become far more work than fun to keep this project alive, and I have felt it has been on life support rather than thriving for an extended period of time now. We are all here to do this as a hobby, and a hobby should never feel more tedious or demotivating thank my intensifying university coursework. As a result, I have elected to bring this chapter of my time on RPG to a close, and formally end Tear the World Down.

I apologize sincerely for leaving it on such an unceremonious note. It is with great regret that I came to this decision. The discord server for this roleplay will remain active for one week following this post for anything you wish to save, after which time it will be shut down. I have additionally edited the application status tag to reflect the current state of affairs. If anyone would like to utilize the lore or other content created here for any purpose, please feel free to contact me about such.

What follows is a more formal post-mortem analysis. In game development, these often follow the shipping of a release version of a title (though the term is often incorrect and outdated since the rise of extended post-launch support). Other members have taken responsibility when I make self-criticism in the past, though as with those this focuses exclusively on things within my control. That does not extend to other people, as there is nothing I can do as a GM to control other users. I can only take actions that influence my players to the best of my abilities.



A Post-Mortem of Tear the World Down

Done Right:
The recruitment process is a point of pride. Having a substantial amount of lore readily available in conjunction with reasonable summaries, and the request for character sheets up front prior to commencement made the process flow well. Seeking character sheets so early in the process I feel was a more accurate way to gauge player commitment and is something I intend to continue. Though the lengthy interest check post is time consuming to create, I would like to believe a more thorough picture of the roleplay in question is overall better for prospective players.

The community fostered between players was incredible to observe and be a part of. The narrative collaboration is another major point of pride. Though the process behind such collaboration was at times rocky, the diverse cast of characters and of players was enjoyable company both within the story and without.

Done Wrong:
The ultimate cause of death was a breakage of a rule I believe in upholding: the progression of a story must never be impeded by any one player. This is not the fault of that player, but rather my fault for failing to ensure alternate paths of plot progression were in place.

Pacing was slow through the duration, in heavy part due to my own actions. I delayed posting due to motivational limitations when I should not have. As GM, actions speak louder than words and if I can wait extended periods to post, so can everyone else. This problem snowballed slowly throughout the duration and after recovering the roleplay from an extended period of downtime (over four weeks), I do not believe it ever fully recovered.

Collaborative posts, while narratively brilliant, were a logistical issue. The attempt at doing these in real time was smart, but fell into a number of pitfalls, availability being chief among them. Doing collaborative posts not in real time (as some were ultimately forced to) creates an extended writing time for a singular post that contributes to the previous problem.

Future Ideas:
I would like to practice more at using a characterless GM post. I feel that the inclusion of my own character in such posts ultimately limited the creative tools at my disposal more than increased them. I also feel that it distracted me with my own narrative instincts kicking in ahead of the GM decision-making the situation ultimately required.

If anyone wishes to add their own critique of the roleplay, me, or anything else, please share. Even if this chapter must come to an end, I am hopeful I may take meaningful lessons from it to do better in my future endeavors on the guild. Again I would like to extend my thanks to everyone for making all of this possible. You have kept me going for as long as I have. I wish I could have better returned your confidence in me.
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