Avatar of Altered Tundra

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17 days ago
Current A decade ago when we made that meme "get kid", this isn't exactly what we meant...
1 like
1 mo ago
Do you think the reason Jesus Christ doesn't rise again is because we keep putting up crosses and he gets flashbacks on how that went last time?
5 likes
6 mos ago
Happy almost crisis!
9 likes
9 mos ago
it's not just a rock IT'S A BOULDER!...or whatever Spongebob said
1 like
10 mos ago
I will never show empathy for a bigot or a man who believed empathy is a made up term. Simple as that.
9 likes

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Cloud Strife
@Mr Allen J You're slipping, Allen.

Regal Square, Prince Ed-Field



If Jackson Drake could sum up the previous moments in just one phrase, it would be “shit is fucked”.

He had tried to take down Mister Roughian himself with a simple, yet effective, cartwheel-transitioned, reverse dropkick to the mid-section. He had done it plenty of times before, all of which had laid out the receiving party of one of his kicks. Had he been able to land it, Jackson had no doubt that the upper hand would’ve gone to him. However, as the events would gradually start to unfold in front of Jackson, he would feel his feet missing their target altogether, and crash into the refreshments table. Jackson body fell face-first through the various dishes and platters that were spread throughout the table. His weight broke the table in two, and in a matter of seconds, the food — the messy, glorious food — fell on top of him, painting his fleshy canvas with their many, many colors. When Jackson would find himself standing, he was covered in almost a dozen different entrees and desserts(and other items of cuisine).

The time it took for him to stand had been just about the same amount of time that it took the receiver of his rage to make an escape, for Jackson couldn’t see anything but a gray smokescreen. As he inhaled some of it, Jackson coughed rather embarrassingly. Little did he know, some of the frosting from the cake had also gone up his nose, so he found himself struggling to get it out. After a few good hacks, he was able to get the buttercream frosting out of his nose. Thankfully, it hadn’t gone up too far. Though, now Jackson had to try to make his own escape. One, he didn’t want to face the wrath of that intimidating voice from right before he ruined anyone else’s chances of getting food from that particular refreshments table. However, as Jackson would find out, that wouldn’t be as easy as he thought.

What the—” Jackson thought maybe he was having a delayed reaction to banging into the table. He thought that maybe he might’ve sprained something, but that wasn’t it. If he had sprained a body part, he’d still be able to move; however, it felt like his entire body was being forced frozen still. As much as he wanted to move. As much as Jackson had the will to ditch this rally, something was keeping him where he stood. It was as if…

And then Jackson heard it - a voice speaking rather calmly in his head. It was a female’s voice. She told him not to move, citing that he might strain something. Immediately, Jackson wanted to know a few things. The most obvious would be who was this woman that was speaking into his mind? And how was she keeping him from walking away?

Jackson didn’t know where to begin as far as figuring this out was concerned. Quite frankly, he just wanted to leave. Seeing as how he couldn’t, the always-stubborn Jackson would do an uncharacteristic thing, and submit to whatever the fuck this was.

Fine, fine,” Jackson sighed, exhaling an exaggerated breath.

When the smoke had finally cleared, Jackson’s eyes looked over to the left of him. He saw a few others, namely the piece of shit that got him into this mess in the first place. “This is your fault Escobar!” Jackson willed himself to speak as loud as he could. Apparently it was harder than he initially thought.
Shameless(U.S. Series) - You remember The Brady Bunch right? Well, imagine if they were the spawn of Satan, and they were the absolute worst family in history.

Life in Pieces - Like the family in Shameless, but nowhere nearly as bad(but still pretty horrible).

In the land before time, Littlefoot's mom, depressingly enough, died. But he had memes so all was well. Until Megatron laser cannoned the fire nation, destroying many cabbages and causing Littlefoot to become a powerful earth bender after Cera was brutally flung across the ocean. "By the power of Greyskull," the flaming homosexual wombat exclaimed, as he slipped and fell, only to be caught by a hopeless romantic trying to figure out the meaning of extraterrestrial existence in bed. Then he realized that without cheese, he could not feed his grandmother so he bought some power metal, pure cheesy goodness. However, Littlefoot was a metalbender, meaning the power metal could be bent, which would be glorious for Fire Nation. So Littlefoot challenged Megatron to a fist fight aboard the ship shaped like a cabbage. "Help me, Obi-wan!" Megatron cried, heard by a crimson eagle living in your basement furnace. Littlefoot tried to defeat Megatron by singing sweet nothings and tempting him with bacon, which was remarkably effective.

"Littlefoot," Megatron blushes, his metal lips stuck with bits of bacon while dipping some Szechuan sauce, "I surrender to your superior, the legendary Obi-wan Kenobi and his Mighty Morphing Power Rangers." Littlefoot laughed triumphantly and then said, "I am your father." Reaching out, he took Megatron's PC and downloaded Windows 10.

And then Nestor Makhno appeared.

"This! Is! Sparta!" Makhno bellowed, before stroking his mustache excitedly.

"If you say so, kid." Littlefoot replied, teleporting behind him before placing his hands on his shoulders to warmly embrace Megatron. Makhno, meanwhile, welcomed them both by performing an RKO outta nowhere. Littlefoot was stunned, but Megatron was impressed by his outstanding skillset.

"So tell me," said the man in the mirror, now twirling his hair

"No" Littlefoot unholstered his gat and immediately opened fire on his little toes by accident. Thus proving that a good set of fingers was required when you have little toes.

Makhno declared, "We must go bowling at Barney's Bowl-O-Rama. Now."

Littlefoot agreed, so they left. With all the haste of a coursing river.

Once there, Makhno spotted the Red Army. "Do you cheeki breeki, сука?"

The Red Army fired at the man in the mirror. Megatron saw this and laughed. A Tank rolled up and Makhno cried, "TANKIES!" in alarm. An Missile landed about eight inches, detonating Megatron's mechanical wiener. He needed a replacement right wiener, for two wasn't enough. The mission impossible theme started playing, and everyone started dancing the chicken dance. When winter did not come after dancing, the conga line to a white walker banquet was formed. In the end, many things applauded the Red Army & Makhno for taking a joke. Megatron cried, "EW MUST ESCAPES HERE FASTLY". But in the end, it returned to random dancing again. Optimus Prime punched Megatron in his pair of tits. Darkness rapidly approached the two, and consumes them, transporting them
In the land before time, Littlefoot's mom, depressingly enough, died. But he had memes so all was well. Until Megatron laser cannoned the fire nation, destroying many cabbages and causing Littlefoot to become a powerful earth bender after Cera was brutally flung across the ocean. "By the power of Greyskull," the flaming homosexual wombat exclaimed, as he slipped and fell, only to be caught by a hopeless romantic trying to figure out the meaning of extraterrestrial existence in bed. Then he realized that without cheese, he could not feed his grandmother so he bought some power metal, pure cheesy goodness. However, Littlefoot was a metalbender, meaning the power metal could be bent, which would be glorious for Fire Nation. So Littlefoot challenged Megatron to a fist fight aboard the ship shaped like a cabbage. "Help me, Obi-wan!" Megatron cried, heard by a crimson eagle living in your basement furnace. Littlefoot tried to defeat Megatron by singing sweet nothings and tempting him with bacon, which was remarkably effective.

"Littlefoot," Megatron blushes, his metal lips stuck with bits of bacon while dipping some Szechuan sauce, "I surrender to your superior, the legendary Obi-wan Kenobi and his Mighty Morphing Power Rangers." Littlefoot laughed triumphantly and then said, "I am your father." Reaching out, he took Megatron's PC and downloaded Windows 10.

And then Nestor Makhno appeared.

"This! Is! Sparta!" Makhno bellowed, before stroking his mustache excitedly.

"If you say so, kid." Littlefoot replied, teleporting behind him before placing his hands on his shoulders to warmly embrace Megatron. Makhno, meanwhile, welcomed them both by performing an RKO outta nowhere. Littlefoot was stunned, but Megatron was impressed by his outstanding skillset.

"So tell me," said the man in the mirror, now twirling his hair

"No" Littlefoot unholstered his gat and immediately opened fire on his little toes by accident. Thus proving that a good set of fingers was required when you have little toes.

Makhno declared, "We must go bowling at Barney's Bowl-O-Rama. Now."

Littlefoot agreed, so they left. With all the haste of a coursing river.

Once there, Makhno spotted the Red Army. "Do you cheeki breeki, сука?"

The Red Army fired at the man in the mirror. Megatron saw this and laughed. A Tank rolled up and Makhno cried, "TANKIES!" in alarm. An Missile landed about eight inches, detonating Megatron's mechanical wiener. He needed a replacement right wiener, for two wasn't enough. The mission impossible theme started playing, and everyone started dancing the chicken dance. When winter did not come after dancing, the conga line to a white walker banquet was formed. In the end, many things applauded the Red Army & Makhno for taking a joke. Megatron cried, "EW MUST ESCAPES HERE FASTLY". But in the end, it returned to random dancing again. Optimus Prime punched Megatron in his pair of tits.
In the land before time, Littlefoot's mom, depressingly enough, died. But he had memes so all was well. Until Megatron laser cannoned the fire nation, destroying many cabbages and causing Littlefoot to become a powerful earth bender after Cera was brutally flung across the ocean. "By the power of Greyskull," the flaming homosexual wombat exclaimed, as he slipped and fell, only to be caught by a hopeless romantic trying to figure out the meaning of extraterrestrial existence in bed. Then he realized that without cheese, he could not feed his grandmother so he bought some power metal, pure cheesy goodness. However, Littlefoot was a metalbender, meaning the power metal could be bent, which would be glorious for Fire Nation. So Littlefoot challenged Megatron to a fist fight aboard the ship shaped like a cabbage. "Help me, Obi-wan!" Megatron cried, heard by a crimson eagle living in your basement furnace. Littlefoot tried to defeat Megatron by singing sweet nothings and tempting him with bacon, which was remarkably effective.

"Littlefoot," Megatron blushes, his metal lips stuck with bits of bacon while dipping some Szechuan sauce, "I surrender to your superior, the legendary Obi-wan Kenobi and his Mighty Morphing Power Rangers." Littlefoot laughed triumphantly and then said, "I am your father." Reaching out, he took Megatron's PC and downloaded Windows 10.

And then Nestor Makhno appeared.

"This! Is! Sparta!" Makhno bellowed, before stroking his mustache excitedly.

"If you say so, kid." Littlefoot replied, teleporting behind him before placing his hands on his shoulders to warmly embrace Megatron. Makhno, meanwhile, welcomed them both by performing an RKO outta nowhere. Littlefoot was stunned, but Megatron was impressed by his outstanding skillset.

"So tell me," said the man in the mirror, now twirling his hair

"No" Littlefoot unholstered his gat and immediately opened fire on his little toes by accident. Thus proving that a good set of fingers was required when you have little toes.

Makhno declared, "We must go bowling at Barney's Bowl-O-Rama. Now."

Littlefoot agreed, so they left. With all the haste of a coursing river.

Once there, Makhno spotted the Red Army. "Do you cheeki breeki, сука?"

The Red Army fired at the man in the mirror. Megatron saw this and laughed. A Tank rolled up and Makhno cried, "TANKIES!" in alarm. An Missile landed about eight inches, detonating Megatron's mechanical wiener. He needed a replacement right wiener, for two wasn't enough. The mission impossible theme started playing, and everyone started dancing the chicken dance. When winter did not come after dancing, the conga line to a white walker banquet was formed. In the end, many things applauded the Red Army & Makhno for taking a joke. Megatron cried, "EW MUST ESCAPES HERE FASTLY". But in the end, it returned to random dancing again.
@Spoopy Scary Happy to be apart of tradition.
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