Recent Statuses

8 days ago
Current yo imagine what Mistral can do with those hands tho
10 days ago
We are all trapped in this prison of posting. It is a matter of where one posts. And when it comes to posting there are only ever two options: double down, or log the fuck off
10 days ago
I'll take "What are ICBMs for 500$"
1 like
24 days ago
Then you can find the cat.
1 like
24 days ago
The cat is secondary but a bonus. I'd honestly focus on finding a nice place to do the interview in your house, make the background real nice and professional, and keep the phone camera at eye level


Harry Potter is not a world view, read another book or I will piss on the moon with my super laser piss.

Most Recent Posts

@Wavy Wallaby

No, you're not late at all. And even if we had started in character posting I'd still be accepting people. But as it stands now, we're still making rather fitful attempts at starting it. I made the experimental choice of trying to assemble a collab post via discord as our opening post so it's moving at the pace of whenever someone contributes.

If you want to join in the frustration of this experimental process, here's the Discord link

So now:

Imperial Census of the Isle of Lazuli

[*] Humans 50%
[*] Orc 20%
[*] Dwarven 15%
[*] Morsen 10%
[*] Gaulletic 5%

Average Life Expectancy
32 years

Causes of death

  • Pneumonia
  • Hypothermia
  • Influenza
  • Malnutrition
  • Dysentery

Economic Production

  • Iron
  • Fish (hake, cod, shellfish, sea bass)
  • Rye
  • Domesticated Animals (sheep, goats, cattle)
  • Barley
  • Oats
  • Sulfur
  • Alum
  • Copper
  • Wheat

Tribute Production

  • Silver
  • Precious Stones
  • Amber
  • Gold
  • Fine Stone
  • Sulfur
  • Gemstones
  • Sealskins
  • Dyes (shell fish)

The Isle of Lazuli has the Minister of the Frontier in Garnalaña.
tbh I came in here thinking I could cheekily suggest you come over and join Empire of the Empty Throne if you were so brave to try the NRP format. Which being in the sort of "brand" I go in leans towards basically having a large amount of player controlled characters under the auspice of national claim doing shit. So you could probably run such a character in the setting, but they'd be one of a dozen. This even suspecting you're talking about a contemporary superhero like the MCU and DCEU.

But for shits and giggles I'll still extend the offer. Though I'm not running magic for the RP, so the summoner attributes would have to lean into the "is this real or not" ambiguity and ye olde mysticism brand. And maybe some psychadelics.
jpaan announces new advancements in cock and ball torture, they call it superior cock and ball tortur
Since @RezonanceV posted his app in the Interest Check thread, here is his census here:

Imperial Census on the Ironclaws/Prefecture of Kaos


  • Hobgoblins 40%
  • Lesser Goblins 15%
  • Human 10%
  • Gaülletic 10%
  • Bugbear 5%
  • Dwarves 5%
  • Myr 5%
  • Other Races 5%

Average life expectancy
29 years

Causes of death
  • Malaria
  • Typhoid
  • Influenza
  • Clan Warfare
  • Plagues

Economic Production
  • Domesticated animals
  • Olives
  • Copper
  • Salt
  • Fish (sardines, anchovies, mackerel, bogue, cod, sea bass, halibut, salmon)
  • Tin
  • Shellfish (oysters, clams, lobster, crab)
  • Barley
  • Iron

Tribute production
  • Olive Oil
  • Salt
  • Shellfish (purple dye)
  • Saltpeter
  • Gold
  • Cattle and Horses
  • Copper

The Ironclaws/Prefecture of Kaos also has the Minister of Spies and the Minister of the Mines in the official service of the Empire.
Can't work off much without the app, chief.

That said I probably wouldn't worry too much about originality, personally. But I don't know the GM or the group or anything. Instead I'd be focused more on how the character reacts to circumstances and how this built them as an individual going in, what flaws they have and would propel them through the plot; consider how these can be resolved and in what way and how these create new conditions to move the character in another way.

But really lacking details on anything over all to say in confidence what you should look at and consider. But if this is reflective of anything, it's that you didn't do a detailed enough character and presented a barely formed mass.

Kingdom of Cor


King William Snowspreader In Midspring house of Coarsecrane


Avan – a race of humanoid bird people. Their heads being like that of a bird, and where ever they would have hair on their bodies they have instead downy feathers.



the Kingdom of Cor is a creation of the province of Mycoria and imperial administration three-hundred forty nine years ago. Originally comprising parts of older vassal territories and a number of smaller states the region was reshaped after the provincial authorities migrated from their old capital of Saña Lodiám to their new capital of Garnalaña four-hundred fifty years ago. The freshly abandoned city became the target of intrigues by the numerous local petty nobles who sought to take it for themselves, in part because of it's well developed tributary port and harbor, and because the immediate watchful gaze of their masters had largely left. A long period of civil unrest bloomed in western Mycoria until the Empire stepped in.

The Gaülletic's pacification campaign was decisive and helped to wipe the slate clean. In return for their alliance with the Empire, the local Avan warlords were given full control of the territory as the vassal polity in the area now known as Cor. This also brought to the fore the rise of the Coarsecrane family, who had before been mere midling nobles and chieftains in the region. But their displays of absolute loyalty and honorable service to the cause captured the attention of the Gaülletic regime who returned the favor, and in turn purchased their favor.

However their title would not protect them and through out the existence of Cor they had to defend themselves from rivals. Routinely the kingdom broiled over in a succession of violent miniature civil wars that would last a season, and then fall quiet for years or a generation at a time. In at least several instances the Coarsecranes would be deposed, only for a cadet branch to re-emerge and reassert their historical claim to the territory.

At present, the Avan kingdom of Cor has evolved to become an example of imperial assimilation, though their status as non-Gaülletic has stopped them from being fully being recognized. All the same, the Corvan Avans have taken well to assimilating Gaülletic culture in a syncretic fashion, adopting the Gaülletic cults into their own cult practices, adopting the language among the upper echelons while even among the lower classes a new hybrid language has emerged bridging the gap between Gaülletic and Corvan-Avan. The Coarsecranes consider themselves even close friends to the déUticea family. Though the death of the family, in Mycoria at least has thrown onto Cor doubt and trepidation for the future, and what sort of loyalty the kingdom should hold to the Empire.

Avan society is still today largely tribal, even with their recent feudalization or bureaucratic promotion in Mycorian politics and society per imperial wishes. The reason for which being that developments aside, the bulk of the population is considerably agrarian and outside of the passed century, developments from the city have been slow to reach inland. This is due in large part to the imperial interests in collecting tribute in sheer volume and the tributary economy of Cor had only developed along the coasts; surplus was directed entirely to the provincial capital. But with the administrative reforms of the region, a certain degree of autonomy could be reached allowing the Cor Avans to begin a series of planned developments. This has had the effect of alienating some tribal chiefs who sought to resist the measures by arms, they failed spectacularly. But those who did not found themselves invited into the new society that was just slowly beginning to emerge from the thick ice of colonial administration, though said ice is still thick and the image is murky, but is emerging.

As per the old tribal traditions, councils of headmen and nobles were an important aspect in royal administration who judged and legislated on the king's decisions. While it existed in a very primitive form, and was more reflective of alliances between the warlords of old Cor there was very much a consistent tendency to discuss things in council, or in parlance with one another before reaching a collective decision. Since the creation of Cor this has been a historical tendency that has waxed and waned depending on the strength or the ambition of the sovereign at the time who occasionally dissolved the court council or enlarged it depending on the fashions in Garnalaña.

Cor's urban development has also given inspiration to a number of leading non-noble figures to someday participate, who have campaigned even among the nobles classes otherwise locked out of the Cor All Council for being too small an aristocrat. But as long as the old order held sway, they were limited in their extent and influence and efforts to expand on the body simply and physically limited. Time and opportunity will too decide this.

Imperial Census of the Kingdom of Cor

15,000,000 inhabitants of mixed race
  • 10% Gaülletic
  • 15% Human
  • 15% Other (tbd when other races are introduced)
  • 60% Avan (Corvan, other)

Average Subject Life Expectancy:
36 years

Causes of Death
  • Pneumonia of the lungs
  • Typhoid
  • Influenza
  • Dysentery
  • Malarial infection
  • Fever

Economic production
  • rye
  • wheat
  • fish (salmon, halibut, cod)
  • barley
  • hops
  • apples
  • plums
  • handicrafts
  • domesticated animals
  • peat
  • iron
  • copper

Tributary Production
  • linens, cloth
  • alcohol
  • glass
  • horses

Kingdom of Cor has the rank of Prime Minister, a resident of the kingdom, whether Gaülletic or otherwise serves as Prime Minister in the Provincial Council
So should we include the Imperial Census from the IntCheck threads in our character sheets? Or leave 'em separate?

Empire of the Empty Throne

An dud yaouank a gav gante
E kouezh an aour eus beg ar gwez
Ha padal an delioù a gouezh
Da ober plas d'ar re nevez

Ul liñsel wenn ha pemp plankenn
Un dorchenn blouz dindan ho penn
Pemp troatad douar war c'horre
Setu madoù ar bed er bez

Eight hundred years ago they came to this land aboard their might ships. Little did we of this land know what they would bring. As the peoples fought a wretched victory one after another they were forced to live as rulers under the yoke of their power and we submitted before them. They, the men of Gaüllo. Tall and skin as pale and blue as a early spring's clear sky as the snow began to melt, their dark eyes staring out from their heavenly towers. Their long ears hearing ever murmur of descent from our chief's mouths and their unrelenting exercise of their power and might upon their shoulders until they broke bone and flesh. Only then did they secure their rule and we came to learn of the home of the Gaülletics across a great dark sea, and whose people, the Gaüllo received our wealth.

But in the long years, as things often do, as the leaves change on the tree over the seasons their rule changed over the many peoples of the land. Even at the beginning they elevated many to become allies. And because the country was vast and the peoples many they required the loyal services of many a high king and so they became nobles to the great foreign court. And even more things evolved. The heartland of Gaüllo came to poor fortunes, struck down by their own poison in success and as they too came here on their boats to conquer, so did the poison and now they are confused.

This territory never had for itself a ruler of local birth. One had always sailed from abroad here to rule on the distant will of the Emperor as emperor in his own right. But something changed and soon we spoke not of the Mormêr as a foreign sovereign come to reign, but as the highest of kings born to this land. Because the Emperor gave him permission to do such, wanting the best of his men close perhaps. And the Mormêr became our friend or rival, in the same way as the old ones did. But the alliances began to shift depending on whose son ruled when as opposed to some distant imperial will. And some attempted to rebel, only to fall under his alliances. And new peoples rose to prominence and old ones fell from his blessing.

But now the poison has taken the Mormêr. His throne is empty, and the court calls to convene a council of nobles to pick a new one, or to steer the fate of this imperial outpost.

And this is the Üe.

This is a attempted reboot to Milkman's old Vassals To An Empty Throne, which I've taken to rebooting with some changes.

As with this RP, we all play as vassal lords to a broader empire. Eight centuries ago, the race known as the Gaülletics invaded the land now known as the Province of Mycoria. Mycoria is a low-fantasy realm, filled with a diverse number of races and monsters. As such the imperial realm is diverse, ranging from the Gaülletics and humans to any number of others. Its reaches span from the warm waters of its south to the frigid arctic fjords and mountains of its far north. All are subjugated before the Empire, and all have long been obliged to serve the realm with its riches and men as tribute.

As is the nature of Empire, none of the vassals of Mycoria are permitted to trade intentionally, and can only trade within the province. All tribute bound for foreign markets, or the Empire broadly and the imperial capital specifically go through the Imperial Merchant Monopoly, with its seat at Garnalaña. It is also at Garnalaña that the conduct of the Provincial Council is exercised.

As of late however, trouble has struck Mycoria. As unrest in the broader Empire spreads the nobles in the dual capital seats of Garnalaña and Móirens have begun scheming. As well, a strange new plague has reached the capital, affecting so far only the Gaülletics. This strange illness has struck several high ranking officers into a coma, or killed them outright; survival seems low. To make matters worse, the former provincial despot – the Mormêr – has passed away, albeit from complications due to age. But he never sired a suitable son to replace him and the throne lies officially empty. As per law an emergency Council of State has been called and all nobles – Gaülletic and otherwise – has been summoned for a special session to decide the future.

This is the map

Of things to know:
Gaülletics – The Gaülletics are a race of elven humanoids, with a pale to mid-shade blue skin. Theirs eyes are typically described as “dark” and ovular. Their hair is ginger, light brown, or blonde. On average they are over six feet tall. They comprise the ruling class of Mycoria, the ruling class of the ruling class even. But they are foreigners and are largely concentrated in two provinces: Móirens and Garnalaña. In their conquests of the region they were known for their tight disciplined organization and adaptability through the recruiting of local allies to supplement their forces. The alliances they made haven't always been equal, and often they were written with the interest of weakening two rival native powers to near decimation.

Móirens – This is considered the Capital of the Mormêr, the place where he, his family, and closest lieutenants have their palaces. The city was established initially as a military post to guard the portage between the two lakes and to help in projecting power further northwards and west towards the coast along the river. As time went on it became more prized for its scenic isolation rather than its defense as internal military politics changed. When the office of the Mormêr became hereditary it became the primary residence of the ruling family as a retreat into isolation. Because of this it also became the military capital as a number of provincial commanders have moved in followed by the civilian officials who are required to work closest with the Mormêr.

Garnalaña – Garnalaña is technically the second capital and functionally where the duties of the head of government operates. It is here legally where products bound for the Imperial Capital are sent for packaging and delivery over seas and up river to Móirens as the local cut. The city has also become the cultural center of the Gaülletic people on the continent, being a home to their major temples to their primary cults. As well as the Imperial Council of the Province, the Merchant's Monopoly is housed here.

Castle Arllánco – This large fortress stands guard over the similar named canal dug into the peninsula dug by the Empire a hundred and twenty years ago as an effort to streamline the movement of tribute around the coast.

The Mormêr – The rank of Mormêr used to be an appointed position from the Imperial Coast across the seat. The one who was appointed to the title would serve for life in the overseas province and serve the imperial interest by ensuring as much tribute went home as possible. However, as instability mounted in an over-stretched empire the title was changed to a hereditary one either because of no good men left in court, or the court needing as many good men as possible. As a result the title of Mormêr became a bloated and self indulgent one as the ruling family no longer found it necessary to send all the tribute back home and has long modified the amount of home-bound tribute to satisfy the balance between personal self-indulgence and career safety; as though the Empire could have afforded to re-invade to reinstall order in a rebellious province. The Mormêr's authority also underwent a change, as the managerial relationship between the numerous vassal states of the region and the Empire was no longer guided as a matter of official court policy but local real-politik and personal policy of the Mormêr and their family and closest confidants. As such, imperial relations within the province became unstable as alliances were often modified on the fly to exert dominance and control over the broad region. The dynasty which has just passed was the déUticea family.

Provincial Council – While the Mormêr is the head of state in Mycoria, the Council is the head of government and there is no head in the head more headier than the Prime Minister. Responsible for daily civilian affairs the Provincial Council is regularly gathered to legislate on matters of minor importance or in emergency situations where the entirety of government is required. When there is a Mormêr they dictate the legal parameters in which he can operate freely. When there is none they become the government. And in this crisis, they must elect a new Mormêr for the Empire, or watch the province unravel around them. The council also serves as a judicial bench, interpreting the existing law in criminal and matters of state misconduct. The council is made up largely of Gaülletic nobles from the military and merchants monopoly, as well as the many ethnic and vassal states that make up the provincial government making the council a large two-hundred strong parliament; even if on the regular only ten to twenty make decisions on particular issues and the Prime Minister is the only constant presence.

The Merchants Monopoly – In essence, this is a small guild of Gaülletic merchants and allies who dictate and control the trade between the province and the Empire at large in a mercantile fashion. Their services do not end simply at the managed trade of goods, but the managing of economic records of the realm to determine the value of goods and products. As well they serve as a bank for the province at large, offering loans of silver and gold teals and writing credit. They are often the finance behind large private or public projects in the province. In partnership with the Imperial Council they are responsible for chartering any new local banks. They also possess the authority to charge merchants with smuggling and piracy should the need arise.

WhAt'S ThE TecH LiKe? - 15th-16th century equivelant.

So applying for this? Fill out this simple application and mark your approximate desired location on the map. Here is the application:

Name and Title of Vassal State:
Race: (Gaülletic, human, or some custome unique race, be sure to add a WRITTEN description of them if not human or Gaülletic)

Special Note
If you add you capital, I will include that on the map. I may try to do other things. Sea lanes to the provincial capital will also be added on my own discretion. Don't dog me down with statistical details either, give it to me clean; you'll know what I mean when I accept you.
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