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6 yrs ago
Current Imagine thinking a root beer other than A&W is the best
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7 yrs ago
Shut the fuck up nerds
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7 yrs ago
Fuck off Garde
8 yrs ago
Stop looking at me
8 yrs ago
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Draugr


The draugr hopped onto the crashed debris with a surprising amount of nimbleness, lightning arcing across it's skin as it looked for that which it's Master sought. Tesla squinted through his monocle from atop the Church, scanning the debris for it's most likely location. Ah, there we go. If the train crashed in such a particular way that debris would end up in such a formation, the spear would have to be under that pile of twisted metal and flesh. Tesla frowned as he saw people struggling to crawl to safety, bleeding out in piles of bodies. Truly this war was a disaster on a scale unlike any Japan had seen. Regardless, the Draugr got to work as it lifted metal off of the discarded spear, grabbing it with one hand while holding up several tons of scrap with the other. Tesla nodded to himself as he scanned the horizon, vaguely noting the other familiars on their way there already. Two more draugr leapt from the Church towards the Railyard, they would be there within minutes. But until then, Tesla sighed as several invisible red lines appeared all around the trains. A child clung to his deceased mother, crying as he knelt on his unmangled leg.

The lines disappeared, the mortar cannons retreating into the Church as the draugr began heading back. All it needed to do was make it back to the fence, after that the spear was theirs. And so the draugr leapt towards the Church to rendezvous with it's fellow corpses, meeting up with them in the middle and preparing for battle as they retreated.
@Red Alice

Well to be fair, it looks like the current Ajax is about to die.
Archer of Lightning
Casters Are The Worst

@Vocab@Froppy@EnterTheHero


Well damn. Tesla collapsed onto one knee, breathing heavily as he observed the scorched land before him. He didn't realize he had been attacking Skuld, if he had known that he probably wouldn't have fired off System Keuranos. Oh well, it couldn't be helped he supposed. She lived regardless, unfortunately she also made sure Ajax lived. He looked over his shoulder, eyes locking with Shuten as he glanced at Ajax. "Apologies my darling, but I'm just about tapped out for the day. Would you mind tearing apart the barbarian behind us?" He knew she would gladly do so, it was just a formality that he ask. He would have to make sure she is well rewarded once she comes back to the Church, perhaps he could invent pizza?

Tesla struggled to stand up, activating Disengage as he plotted a course around Ajax. It was easy really, the battle hadn't even started yet so escaping from the Berserker wouldn't be a problem. Oh, but he should probably leave him a present just in case. With that in mind, several invisible red lines appeared all around Ajax, signalling yet another barrage of mortar fire. "Enjoy your meal darling!" And with that he was off.




Vlado Nikolic

A Deal Is Struck

@EnterTheHero@ReallyDumb


Vlado was very very mad. No, to say he was mad was an understatement of the highest degree. Vlado was livid, Vlado was furious, Vlado was blinded with rage. First the long dead god Chiron drove his Servant to madness, trying to get him to kll Vlado. Then this new Servant burst in, breaking the ground beneath him and forcing him onto his feet, the absolute nerve of him! But above all else, he stole from his Servant. He fucking stole, from his Servant. The rage in the European's eyes would've killed a mortal man, but this was no mortal man. This was Jack the Giant Slayer, the legendary thief. The top portion of his Command Seal disappeared, he opened his mouth to scream his order.

"Caster! Snap the fuck out of it right now and kill this bastard!" The haze that had come over Frankenstein would disappear immediately as Vlado got to his feet, staring down Jack with venom. "You think you can come into a Caster's Workshop and just steal their magnum opus? Who the fuck do you think you are! I'll tell you who you are Jack! You're a goddamn dead man!" With that being said, Vlado hopped backwards behind Frankenstein, content to let him do the work of crushing this fucking idiot. "Summon everything! Everything!" His hands ran through his hair over and over, a futile attempt to calm himself from his rage as each stroke only reminded him of his now lost Command Seal.


Mourningstar vaguely heard the enraged shout of the Slime from the other group, but she promptly ignored it. She didn't feel like listening to the self important fuck go on a rant about her cowardice or something, she was well aware of what a piece of shit she was already. She noted how the light of the cave was growing dimmer and turned her attention back to her new task. Night would soon fall, bringing with it the wrath of the Goblins. If she was lucky she would find the Mother Wisp and band together with it to fight off the Goblins, there likely wouldn't be many after her former companions dealt with them. Most likely the remnants of the Goblins would flee into the cave to try and start over, either being slaughtered by the other species or building themselves back up from the ashes of their defeat. It mattered not, the cave ecosystem would adapt.

As she lost herself in thoughts of science and ecology she gently bumped into a pixie who cut off her path, a small grunt echoing through the cave as Mourningstar glared at Oberon. "I'm leaving. It's what you all wanted right?" She looked back at the group to see Digbie of all people trying to be leader, failing at it miserably too. "None of you wanted me around. Digbie is already trying to take my spot without even attempting to see what I was doing. It's pretty clear that my place isn't here." Her eyes narrowed as she stared at Oberon, her annoyance clear. "I see the way you guys look at me. How you all ignore me and try your best to not talk to me. Ardur ran the first chance he got, Rain disappeared right after I saved her life. None of you want to be around me. Even you, you'd rather copy Mana Shot from watching me rather than talking to me. I saved your life and you refuse to talk to me until I start walking away with valuable loot." A brief silence washed over the duo as Mourningstar formulated her thoughts, before a light sigh brushed forth from her lips. Her gaze softened, eyes moving downwards as she lost her nerve.

"I don't blame you. I'm useless to be quite honest. Useless in my past life and useless now, it was dumb to think I could try and be around people just because I'm in a new body." She moved past Oberon, her voice natural and light compared to the usual deep sultry tone she used. "I'm going to go die probably. I don't know, I'm just sick of being a burden on everyone I meet. Either I'll come back in a better form like little slime warlord over there, or I won't come back at all. It's a win win for you either way." She stopped as she hefted her satchel into a more secure spot on her shoulder(?), glancing at it with sad eyes. "I figured I would take some crystals for myself since I found them, but if you guys really want them you can have them. Probably wouldn't make much sense to have a dead man walking away with things she'll never use." Mourningstar tried to lighten the mood with some self deprecating humor, but she only felt worse. Why did he have to make it hard, why couldn't he have just let her leave like he wanted her to. They had plenty more Mana Crystals, did it really matter that she took just a few for herself? It didn't matter really, it was highly likely she would die the moment she ventured out by herself anyways. "Later." Mourningstar set the bag down on the ground gently and continued her course, ready to leave this conversation behind as soon as she could.


The back and forth between Master ans Servant proved to be entertaining to say the least, the Persian Master did not fail to reply in his retort as he continued to diagnose Tesla. Symptoms in spades he did indeed have, awkward reaction times, thick blood, possibly arsenic poisoning. Strong arsenic poisoning too if it could affect a Servant, meaning it had to be Servant level poisoning. Tesla quickly downed the tea, his face grimacing as he reminded himself that this was in fact for his own good. Tea will be a thing of the past within the next century, just like coffee, he had said so in his first life and he would stick to his guns all the way into this one. He quickly ran through the various feelings he had felt last night with clinical precision, pausing once he reached the worst part of his little float down the river. "There was something very dangerous in the river. Something which would terrify any man in their right mind, Servant included. It could only be described as a... Monster." The capital M was clear to anyone listening, this was something which surpassed even his love next to him. Something indescribable. But Tesla did his best regardless.

He was then asked what kind of Servant could possibly poison him with Arsenic, which immediately sent Tesla into the Throne of Heroes's database to try and find a culprit. Unfortunately there were many many heroes with Arsenic as a part of their legend, Assassins mostly but there was the occasional Caster mixed in here and there. There had to be something to narrow it down somewhat, some part of his poisoning last night that was unique compared to every other arsenic poisoner. It was then that it hit him, what exactly had poisoned him. "The river... I was poisoned by the river itself... That could only leave-" His train of thought was interrupted as Suzaku burst into the room.

"Tesla! Xerxes! Ludwig! Everyone!! WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!"




A problem indeed, what Suzaku described could only be a Caster claiming a major leyline for themselves. Of course the first one who came to mind was the one he was currently aligned with, which could only mean bad things for the city. A groan came from purple darling in the corner and Tesla repressed a groan. Speaking of bad things for the city. "Mmmnnn... We'll just kill them. Come on..." Well it was a simple plan that left a lot to build on, but it was a sound- Tesla grunted as Shuten shoulder checked the scientist, away from his injured side thankfully, and slung him over her shoulder. Well, maybe he would have a chance to convince her to let him go before she reached the door. His eyes followed her sight line as best as he could, another groan rumbling from his chest as they burst through the window.

Well, it was time to formulate a plan now. He needed to take care of this Caster quickly and efficiently, he was still recovering from injuries and didn't want to put too much stock in Xerxe's supposed miracle tea. Even if it could heal him completely, there was absolutely no guarantee it would do so instantly, so he didn't want to get into a prolonged battle with lots of movement which could aggravate his wounds. Well, looks like it's time to tell Shuten who he was. She wouldn't mind, as long as he put up a good fight she would continue to love him most likely. Hmm, Oni love was quite strange, but it really made perfect sense for a species so focused on chaos. They landed at the edge of what used to be Miyama, Tesla quickly getting to work as the mortar cannons atop the Church emerged once more. The bombardment began quickly, firing at the bounded field's edge nearest to them to try and crack it open like an egg. He was only going to get one shot at this, so it needed to count. Tesla put his monocle on, his vision growing sharper as he stared at the Bounded Field and prepared for the first strike.

He looked at Shuten with a very serious gaze, yet a hint of mischief lied in his eyes. "If I recall correctly your greatest rival was the scion of Minamoto correct? She wielded lightning, which is why you mistook me for her that first night. Allow me to show you what true lightning is." With that statement he inclined his head slightly, a clear sign for Shuten to back away lest she wish to be caught in the descent of the gods. "Now let my legend be known." Tesla planted his feet into the ground firmly, staring at the Bounded Field to determine the exact moment to begin. It was then, a crack rang out as yet another bolt of lightning fell upon the barrier. It was then that his Mana flared.




Here exists God's thunder,

The air around Tesla filled with power, static shocking anyone nearby as the protons and electrons in the air began to multiply. It was palpable, the raw energy that Tesla radiated as he prepared his greatest weapon.

That which I stole and gave to mankind!

Tesla's eyes practically glowed as he felt the power building up within him, raising his right hand into the air behind his head and aiming carefully. The thunder of the cannons was but a background noise as he waited for the Bounded Field to shatter, to fall before his continuous assault.

Let all men rejoice,

The charged air only grew heavier, lightning beginning to flash into existence around him with increasing speed. A keen eye would observe strange distortions around each flash, each flash lasting just a little too long as time began to fall apart around the raw energy. Faster and faster, a ring around Tesla made of plasma.

For this is the Advent of Lightning!

The lightning began to bend, the focal point of it all becoming Tesla's hand as space began to crumple directly into his fingers when he closed his fist. Each moment was an supereon, every inch was a gigaparsec. Time and space held no meaning when compared to the power of a god.

Behold my works!

The field shattered. And so too did the world. Tesla's gaze locked onto the Caster standing stark still in the middle of her ritual and he smiled.

System Keuranos!


It could only be described as the second coming of the god of thunder and lightning. Time and space bent as Tesla flung himself forwards, the energy that had collected within him releasing and obliterating everything in it's path. If the day before had signaled a world falling upon the cursed blaze, this could only be considered a galaxy. Something with so much weight, that it distorted anything around it. This was the legend that changed humanity, which began the Age of Human Innovation. It was all the power that would ever be generated, all the power that had ever been generated, every flash of lightning that had ever struck the Earth and every engine which would ignite and propel humanity forwards. It was Alaya's cry, it was the cry of all men and women. It was devastating.

Anything in it's path, anything which even tried to block the beam of energy would be annihilated. If a bullet had someone's name on it, this could only be a letter to anything even remotely in the area. It was a dislocation of time and space, turning everything around it into raw particles. Legends would be told about Miyama for centuries to come, about how the day after the greatest storm to ever be witnessed passed, an even greater bolt of lightning struck the land. It was Susanoo himself returning for just one last potshot, to make sure the land of the gods was never touched again.
Vlado Nikolic

Ah, I See

@Paradox Witch@EnterTheHero


Vlado stared down at the Servant as he began to laugh, Vlado beginning to chuckle as well. He didn't really know why, but the funny little man in front of him had some really infectious laughter. Truly just listening to this Heroic Spirit laugh made him want to laugh along with him, as if there was an unspoken joke hanging in the air that was just the funniest thing in the world. Suddenly Vlado's laughter cut off as something in the World around them changed. Indeed, something was fundamentally different with Gaia. "Not tryin' ta blackmail me? Ya think I'm an idiot, kid? Ya decide ya found someone who cares about human life, and ya decide to come to his place. 'Oh, this isn't a threat, but if ya don't stay outta my way then these people might be fucked, it's just business'. Ya have the gall to come here and spout off shit like that, and act like the one in control here's you?" No, it wasn't here that had changed. It was somewhere much closer, closer than he had realized. The hand upon which is Command Seals rested twitched, Vlado was almost tempted to call the doctor and his whole arsenal here just to stop Chiron, but it was too late.

"See, kids like you really make me wonder. Can ya not fuckin' read? I guess Donnie's right, I'm so busy havin' fun that I don't botha thinkin' about how I get seen. Cause a' that, kids like you get ta thinkin' they mean somethin'. Well, here's ya first lesson, kid: you're talkin' to a god, and there are two things ya oughta know about gods. Their minds are alien compared ta yours, and they really, really hate this little thing called 'hubris'." Vlado's smirk was wiped clean off his face as he stared at the centaur with an inscrutable poker face, wondering if it was worth it to punch out the mouthy Servant in front of him before he pissed him off any further. No, there was no point. This pitiful corpse he had taken temporary refuge in didn't have the strength to even turn a Servant's head, much less do something fun like breaking their jaw.

"Let's play a little game. Let's say this is an ancient Greek story. A human decides ta come to a god's territory and act like he's hot shit. Lemme ask ya somethin': is somethin' good about ta happen to that human?" Something had just changed within Chiron, even Vlado could feel it. It was true, he had vastly underestimated the God in front of him, he had sized him up from physical appearance and first impression, now he would face the consequences of his hubris. Vlado grinned. This was the type of challenge he lived for, what he had come to the Holy Grail War for.

"Well, allow me to provide you with the answer, child of man."


Before Vlado disconnected from the familiar, leaving it to slump forwards on top of Chiron to disintegrate simply from contact with such a high level mystery, he said one last thing to the god before- no, the god standing above him in every way. "I suppose negotiations are over then. Remember this when I come back to raze your lands. The Age of Gods ended a long time ago goat. God is dead." And with that Vlado disconnected.




Vlado opened his eyes and felt it. The heavy scent of alcohol, the feeling of Mystery in the air. And not a half assed Mystery like those which permeated Magus society, no this was a true Mystery in every sense of the word. Something he could not hope to unravel given several dozen lifetimes, something likely from the Age of the Gods. Strange, he could've sworn Chiron was an Archer. But there was no time to dwell on this as Vlado's battle honed instincts exploded in his head. It was like a missile was heading straight for him, no even deadlier. He rolled off the table as it exploded, landing on his feet and jumping backwards as Frankenstein swung for him once more. "Ah, I see." Well this is troublesome.

[h2]

Archer of Lightning
We Can Rebuild Him

@Froppy@EnterTheHero@Reflection@Yukitamas@Kyoka@Scallop


Ludwig was the first to greet him upon entry to the Church, promptly panicking and asking what the hell had happened last night, along with the unspoken question of who exactly did this to him. Tesla would not lie, that would be harmful to the overall alliance really. He just wasn't going to tell the whole truth. "A Servant or several Servants bound curses of all types to the fire. Shuten and I managed to take one of their arms as well as poisoning him, but he managed to escape at the last moment. It was quite unfortunate." He proceeded to describe the foes he fought last night to the best of his ability as Xerxes emerged from the basement, casually dropping the exact bombshell he had been trying to keep hidden. Well, he supposed the secret was bound to get out eventually. He was just hoping it wouldn't be so soon. Xerxes motioned for Tesla to follow him to his workstation, Tesla gently setting down Shuten Douji as Xerxes began his work.

"I hope you'll accept my apology, but I did check in on you after the incident. Your current state is... Rather unhealthy to your core." Tesla smirked as Xerxes said this, already working on his new arm with his now freed hand. It had been so long since he had gotten to do this to someone who wasn't Edison, he was going to savor this.

"I never would have guessed. Are there any other bits of wisdom you wish to bestow upon me Master of Berserker?" It had been so long since Tesla had gotten to shoot off a snappy remark at someone, it was almost as good as a shot of liquor. Almost. Xerxes noted the poison with curiosity, wondering whether it came from before he had fallen into the river or after. Tesla pondered on this for but a moment before answering, nodding firmly as he spoke. "It was most certainly after, I had not been touched prior to the Oni attempting to kill me and throwing myself into the river. And as you said, this poison is different from hers." He twisted his finger near the elbow of the new arm, using some minor electromagnetic manipulation to tighten up the joint. He had already created a functional arm that could channel his lightning in the same amount of time it took Xerxes to fill in the hole in his chest, Item Construction really came in handy. The fingers curled inwards and outwards as he made sure the arm was functioning properly for normal use at the least, he would have to test it for battle later once he was better rested.

"I'm sure you're aware, but I am not going to be able to go out into battle for the day at the very least. If there is anything you would like created, simply let me know and I can work on it while I rest." Working and resting didn't really belong in the same sentence together, but that's just the kind of man Tesla was. He could never just sit in bed all day and relax, not when there was something to be done. Always something to be done, no time for relaxing. Especially now.


The battle was over it seemed, all people involved safe (aside from Digbie's torn ass), and things were back to the usual. Jason grabbed the Source Crystal to experiment with it, Mourningstar wanted to stop him but at the same time... she just didn't have it in her to care. She had done her best to try and lead everyone, but nobody seemed to care. Nobody listened to her, Ardur had vanished, Rain was gone, everyone was abandoning her. She did everything right though didn't she? She took suggestions, she gave second chances, she tried to protect everyone around her even at the cost of her own life. So why did everyone just ignore her? Was she not being assertive enough? Was it because she was weak? Did she just radiate an aura of unreliability, so nobody wanted to be around her? This experiment had been a complete failure, she should've expected it.

Nobody would listen to a weak willed loser, doubly so if they were as pathetic as she. So she needed to become stronger somehow, somehow. It was because she was forced to share EXP with the people she tried to lead, she needed to be alone if she wanted to be strong enough. But that's okay, she was used to being alone. She floated past Asura and Digbie, picking up the torn cloth that lay in the cave and floating over to the stash of Mana Crystals that Jason was messing with. She quickly tied up the cloth as best she could, forming it into a kind of satchel for carrying as she picked up three Mana Crystals and a Flame Touched Mana Crystal, putting them all in the bag. Mourningstar nodded as she floated past Oberon with her haul, going deeper into the cave. "Yeah. It's time to get stronger."

And of course, the best way to grow stronger was to find someone stronger. Learn, grow, advance. The slimes had the Mother Slime, the rats had the Mother Rat, the Goblins had Crispy and Rattleskull, it only stood to reason that there must be someone like that for both the other species as well. So Mourningstar would find the biggest Wisp in the cave. She would either learn from them. Or she would kill them. "Yeah. Yeah. That will work." She muttered to herself as she got further and further away from the group. She stopped for a moment and pondered. 'Is this really the right choice? Am I being hasty, should I go back to the safety of the group? Sure I'll stagnate, I would never be respected, but I would be safe.'

'Safe until they realize how useless you are.' The voice cut through her hesitance like a hot knife through butter. 'Yeah, they'll toss me aside once the Goblins are taken care of. This is the better path. The only path.' And with that in mind, she went to search for her teacher.
I would prefer 1v1s, but I'm down for either.
Vlado Nikolic
Negotiations Actually Begin, For Real This Time

@Paradox Witch


Vlado shrugged, observing the short bald man passively as he spoke. After he was finished, a small smile spread on the large corpse's face, something that would look absolutely menacing if it weren't directed towards the legendary teacher of heroes. "You're a funny man Chiron, I think I would've liked to summon you. Well, I would've liked to summon you if I were an alcoholic. But that's besides the point." The familiar straightened up, refraining from leaning on the glass anymore as he looked down upon the Servant before him. His eyes darted to the inside of the bar, noting the lack of corpse anywhere nearby. Either it's been disposed of or they moved it, doesn't matter. It was a worthless old man, no enhancements made whatsoever. The only reason he had sent it over was because he had been trying to be friendly. Now he wasn't.

"My name is Vlado Nikolic, I'm a Master in this Holy Grail War, just like your Master Gin Yoshiyaki, the local boss of the yakuza." A small yawn escaped his lips, a completely voluntary action considering New Lifers didn't need to breathe. "I know the fire last night caused many many deaths, which is why I'm sure your Master wants to save as many lives as possible so as to keep his criminal activities funded or some such reason. I have no idea how Japanese crime works, nor do I care. I just know that the one hundred people of Fuyuki I have... borrowed over the past two days seemed very certain that the yakuza and Gin Yoshiyaki cared about them when I asked." After casually dropping that bombshell the corpse grinned, it's glassy eyes reflecting Chiron's face as he stared at the Archer of Debauchery before him.

"Now to be clear, I am not trying to blackmail you. I've collected more than enough people to keep my little factory running, so I don't really need to borrow anymore civilians. I might borrow them if I want to, but I no longer need to. I just wanted to talk with your Master about where we are going to go from here. If he wants them returned or not, if he's willing to call a peace treaty as long as I stop borrowing people, that sort of thing you know? Wanted to be polite with the local crime man." Vlado's smirk was as smug as could be as he turned away from the Servant and looked back inside the bar.

"But like I said, I'm here to talk with your Master. Not you. I don't like to use other people as messengers, the message can get muddied." His foot tapped the bottle of Bacardi thrown away, before kicking it further down the street like a bored child. "So unless your Master is inside, I will be back tonight to talk to him. Maybe I'll even come myself. Who knows, I have a busy day ahead of me." He recognized how rude he was being, how the Servant in front of him could kill him before he even had the idea to blink. But it didn't matter, it's not like he joined a war to make friends. As far as he was concerned, Chiron was just another corpse walking about for he and Frankenstein to tear apart and rebuild into something more useful.
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