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Very well, where do I begin?

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.

Most Recent Posts

@Sep Dammit. There goes my season ender.
Master Bruce's Batman makes me angry because every time I read it, I realize how much more effort I'm gonna have to put into my next Superman post in order to keep up. Dammit, man, you're going to be the death of me.
AndyC




@Master Bruce

Once that's done I'd like a full analysis on the evolution of all of the interpretations of Batman you've done in the history of these games, what you like about each version, what you don't, and so forth. No lazy answers. You'll be graded for these essays.


...

What's sad is that I'm fully willing to do that, too.
A complete sheet from me... finally.

The Magnificient



Character You're Applying For:
Pietro Maximoff (Quicksilver)
Jean Grey (Miss Marvel)
Scott Summers (Cyclops)
Tara Markov (Terra)
Garfield Logan (Beast Boy)
Jubilation Lee (Jubilee)

Powers And Abilities:
With this X-Force team, I want them to be young adults around the age of 18-20 and so their powers are at their basic level with only some years of training behind them. At this stage, they have remained hidden and have not had any field practice as actual heroes. The only training they’ve had with their powers has been within the walls of the Xavier Institute. Throughout this game, they will come out of the shadows as heroes and train further with their powers as they do, all the while dealing with anti-mutant individuals and groups.

Origin And Backstory (In A Maximum Of Four Paragraphs):
Charles Xavier and Max Eisenhardt met when they were both still young men. Max was a victim of the Holocaust at a young age and was experimented on ruthlessly by Nazi scientists when they found out he was a mutant. They kept him heavily medicated and only partially conscious . He was eventually able to escape from his torment and immediately began using his powers to fight back against the men persecuting his people. He would often stoop to his enemy’s level in his crusade. While Max fought and struggled, Charles Xavier was pampered and studied his own mutant powers and how they came about. He was eventually approached by the United States government for his powers as well as his expertise. He worked with the government to clean up after incidents involving mutants. Through his work, he learned about Max and his fight against the Nazi party. By this time, Max had his own small band of guerilla fighters, some with their own powers. As the U.S. entered the war, they joined with Max’s forces. With Xavier’s help, they kept the aid of super-powered individuals a secret. Max was unhappy with this outcome but was convinced by Charles to work with the government for the betterment of both mutantkind and other super-powered individuals in need of aid.

For years they worked at this task, with Charles using his powers to erase memories on a massive scale to keep the secret, especially due to Max’s rather violent and extreme tactics in the field. Because of this, Max was kicked from the program. With Max went other individuals, Raven Darkholme among them, and they formed their own band of supers. They focused on fighting against people they deemed evil. Their activities created more work for Charles and his abilities. This continued for years, and Charles slowly stepped back from the program and focused more on educating the younger generation dealing with their powers. As he grew in age, Charles’ powers waned until he was unable to comply with the government and perform another mass memory wipe, and thus individuals with powers became common knowledge. With that, Charles was let go from the program.

Fully away from the program, Charles was able to focus solely on educating the younger generation. Eventually, he crossed paths with Max again. Without the government being involved, Max was more willing to listen to his old friend and agree to join him in his goal to educate the younger generation. Raven Darkholme was lost to the wind by this point. There were many disagreements as the partnership was begun anew, mostly with allowing the students to enter the field with the other super-powered individuals. Charles was still hesitant because of the government, but Max believed the students could help people in need. The stalemate lasted for a while, but as Charles’ health got worse and he was bedridden he agreed to let the older students into the field under Max’s supervision and the condition that they would not operate as violently and extreme as his guerilla fighters had in the past. Knowing his friend did not have long left in this world, Max agreed to his conditions.

The first field team would be christened “X-Force” and be made up of: Pietro Maximoff, Jean Grey, Scott Summers, Tara Markov, Garfield Logan, and Jubilation Lee. Pietro came to the Xavier Institute for Gifted Children with his father, Max, and has been made the field team leader. Jean was one of many students found by Charles and has become his personal student because of the nature of her powers, though her telepathic abilities have been suppressed for years by Charles. With his health getting worse, he must focus all of his remaining power on keeping her powers in check until she can fully control them. Scott was found by Charles and Henry McCoy after an incident with his powers going unchecked; this was one of the last times Charles was able to perform a mass memory wipe and take Scott into his school to help him. Tara and Garfield were transient teens hiding away because of their powers, but they were found and brought in by Henry. Jubilation Lee was one of the lucky ones and found the school as her powers began showing and was able to avoid incident. Their goal as the X-Force is to help people in need and find those individuals with powers and mutations who live on the fringe of society in hiding and give them a home and a safe place to learn how to control their powers.

What Makes This Character 'Ultimate'?:
I think these characters will have interesting interactions together as they grow as heroes. What makes them ultimate is how they must overcome bigotry thrown at them by the people they work to save as they also try to make the world a better place for their own kind. This team is also led by Quicksilver with Xavier and Magneto acting as mentors along with Henry/Hank McCoy.

Supporting Characters:
Max Eisenhardt (Magneto) - The current supervisor of the X-Force field team and long friend of Charles Xavier. Max recently joined the Institute to help younger individuals learn to control their powers and help those in need.
Charles Xavier - Founder and current head of Xavier Institute for Gifted Children.
Henry McCoy - Henry is also known as Hank or Beast. He is a mutant and friend to Charles and has been with the school since its founding. He has a genius-level intellect and develops the team’s tools and gadgets.
Danny the World - Danny is a sentient brick able to construct buildings and streets around him because of his unique physiology. Danny is Xavier Institute and has constructed the entire campus and its building from his main brick. He is able to communicate telepathically with those on campus. He is also able to transport his main brick and others to different locations around the globe; when he does so he is able to maintain the structures of the campus and so acts as the field team’s mode of transportation.

Character Picture:









Beast Boy/The X-Force are hereby...



I want a long-winded analysis about every era of comics and what you like about them in relation to Batman stories. Golden Age, Silver Age, all of it.


Hoo boy. That's gonna have to wait until tomorrow.

Not because I have to think about the question, but because it's literally too late in the day for me to even get started on answering.

...

So does anyone want to hear my long-winded rankings of three recent prolific Batman artists aswell, or...?
Excellent post, @Master Bruce. I like the idea that Nashton is a profiler and agent of CHECKMATE. Really neat spin given we've had him be a police detective, a majority shareholder, and a bunch of other roles in these games before. Can't wait to see how things turn out going forward.


Thanks! This version of Edward is one I've put alot of thought into over the years. Basically, it's the version I wanted Nolan to do in the movies, where he comes in as the lead guy looking to bring Batman down after the events of The Dark Knight. I'm hoping I can stick with it for the long run, because I've plotted this dude's entire story arc.
When it comes to Spider-Man, I'm more of a Bendis' initial run on Ultimate kinda guy. I also liked early JMS, before he went goddamn insane and wrote shit like The Other and Sins Past.
...I actually like alot of Slott's stuff...

There. My darkest secret shame revealed.

I like Dan Slott.

Be kind to me, fate.



Gotham City, Elliot Memorial Hospital
12:15 PM


"Is his condition stable enough to give witness testimony?"

The doctor gave Captain Gordon an odd look, the kind that stated exactly what had become the expected response concerning any known prominent member of the five families of Gotham: don't push things that aren't your concern, or you'll wind up six feet beneath the harbor. But Gordon had been adamant about being able to speak with Maroni ever since he had arrived with the police detail that was assigned to protect the wounded mobster. Captain Flass of Gotham Central may have been on Salvatore's personal payroll, and it wasn't exactly a closed secret, but Gordon was able to claim jurisdiction on this through one fortunate loophole: thanks to a victim of the previous night's assault who had been pressed into talking in exchange for lenience, this was no longer a simple shooting case. This was a Batman case, and the Major Crimes Unit of Precinct 27 were specifically assigned to any and all sightings of the vigilante until capture. Gordon narrowed his eyes and folded his arms as he awaited the doctor's response.

"I-I suppose, yes, the patient would be able to give you a statement once he's been transferred to a room following recovery. But I should warn you, the surgery to the ligament was extensive. It's likely that Mr. Maroni won't be able to walk without the aide of a cane for the rest of his life, so he may be a bit... distraught."

Gordon fought back a smirk, knowing it would seem unprofessional.

"Well, I'll try and be delicate. Wouldn't want him to file a complaint with the Commissioner, would we?", Gordon sarcastically replied, turning to one of his officers at the door. "Valley, you're on guard. Radio me the moment that he's available. I'm going for a smoke."

The officer nodded as Gordon headed for the elevator. By the time that he had reached the nurse's station, his phone began to vibrate, prompting him to produce it from out of his front pocket. There were a few messages that he'd missed - primarily from his daughter Barbara, who wanted him to go on a grocery run - but there was one message that primarily piqued his interest. Comissioner Loeb had personally texted him fifteen minutes prior, sending a forboding message...

STAY WHERE YOU ARE, GORDON. HEADING TO YOU.

"Oh, Christ."

The Captain clenched the phone in his hands, wishing he'd thought to take his smoke break even earlier - to have potentially missed this undoubtedly unfortunate encounter to come. There was no denying that Gillian Loeb was a man of considerable influence within Gotham, and if you got on his good side, you would be treated very well for the rest of your career. Gordon had unfortunately made the mistake of trying to be an honest, law-abiding cop ever since he'd joined the force. And in Gotham City, that wasn't the sort of mentality that earned you points with the Commissioner. You were expected to play ball, or you'd find yourself on the receiving end of a billy club until you did.

The only reason that Gordon had even been allowed to be promoted to Captain in the first place was because the press had gotten to him before Loeb could silence the troublesome Lieutenant for good, with reporters labelling him as a hero cop for personally capturing the infamous serial killer Joe Collins, 'The Burnside Butcher'. In truth, he'd happened upon Collins in the midst of a botched robbery, only managing to nab the collar through sheer luck - and at great expense, as it was during this incident that Gordon had tragically lost his wife in the ensuing shootout.

Jim's loss had garnered public sympathy, however, essentially making him untouchable - and it was to Loeb's absolute frustration, who'd put on the public face of entrusting Gordon with turning the most corrupt precinct in Gotham around under a deserving leadership. Loeb even commenced the promotion with a speech that decorated Jim as one of Gotham's top officers.

That entire story was false, of course, because what had actually happened felt more like a demotion - Jim had been made Captain of the only precinct in Gotham who wasn't on the take. Therefore, the one that was assigned the cases that went nowhere. The one that was horribly underfunded. The one that every cop that had been made scared for not accepting a bribe eventually wound up serving with, in mortal fear for their families lives. A professional dead end, so to speak, for a man that Loeb couldn't personally have removed.

As luck would have it, though, that was precisely why Gordon's unit had been assigned to The Batman. Whenever traumatized witnesses had first come forth describing a literal demon leaping out of the skies and beating the living hell out of would-be muggers and thieves six months prior, Flass passed the case onto Precinct 27 with a laugh, thinking it to be a wild goose chase to keep the meddling Gordon out of his hair for at least a couple of months. But the more that the so-called "Flying Mouse" had hit hard at the operations of the bigger gangs, and eventually the five families themselves, it became no secret that Flass had regretted giving the collar away. Batman was a threat to the entire operation that ensured Flass' livelihood, and Jim wasn't about to let that slip through his fingers. Not without a fight.

As the elevator doors opened, Gordon was greeted with a particularly flustered looking Commissioner Loeb. Practically shoving the Captain against the wall of the lobby, Loeb grit his teeth as he got directly into his subordinate's face.

"There you are, you interfering little shitstain..."

Gordon composed himself, but stared back, defiantly refusing to give into the Commissioner's abuse.

"Now just a minute, Gill. Before you even start with this, you and I both know that I have every right to be here. This is our case because you know exactly who attacked Maroni."

"I don't want to hear it, Gordon!", Loeb spit back, releasing the Captain from his grip. "I've been lenient with you on these... insubordination in the past, but you're stepping onto thin ice this time. And even your buddies at the Gotham Herald won't be able to save you if you keep this up. You know damn well that Maroni is off limits."

"And why is that, sir?", Jim asked, sneering. "Because he's a prominent citizen, or because he's a prominent contributor to your campaign for re-election?"

Loeb spun around, enraged, ready to strike the Captain for that comment. But Gordon was quick to acknowledge the oncoming doctors and nurses that were just returning from their lunch break, heading directly for the area and completely oblivious to Loeb's growing hostility. Knowing that he didn't want to cause a scene, he relented, lowering his tone of voice ever so slightly.

"I'm going to ignore that for the moment, because you've caught me in a generous mood. But my generosity only extends so far, Captain. You'd be wise to remember that in the future."

Gordon began to walk past him.

"Oh, I'm very aware. Now if we're done, I was just heading off prepare for writing up Maroni's statement. So if you don't mind..."

Immediately, Loeb grabbed him by the arm.

"I do, actually. You didn't let me finish. When I said I was in a generous mood, I meant to say that I came here with a more tangible purpose than reminding you of who's in charge.", Loeb began, his venomous tone slipping into a whisper. "Clearly, that damn vigilante is proving too much of a task for your department to handle. Everyone in this city knows it the second that he lights up one of those giant floodlights in the sky, telegraphing your department's failure. You've been chasing smoke and mirrors for six months, and you still have nothing to show for it. That's why I'm giving the case to someone more qualified, so that this department might stand a chance of cleaning up your mess."

Gordon ripped his arm away.

"Like hell you are. You'll need my department's cooperation if you want to strong-arm me away from this. Like it or not, we have the most extensive intel on The Batman in the entire city. Your boys wouldn't know where the hell to begin."

Loeb smiled.

"Oh, I didn't say your department was completely off the case. I'm not a complete fool, James. I know what a nightmare of legal tape that would be to try and navigate. But seeing as you are no longer fit to lead the investigation, the precinct is going to be following the lead of a new head investigator that will report directly to me. Someone who will have authority over each and every one of you, able to keep your precinct in line in a way that you can't."

Gordon's eyebrow raised.

"What in God's name are you talking about?"

"I believe, Captain, that your superior was referring to me..."

Turning around, Gordon was met with the outstretched hand of a stranger standing before him, dressed far from conspicuously. Jim's eyebrow raised high as he noticed the man's attire: dressed from head-to-toe in a slavishly pressed green three-piece suit, the individual looked directly into Gordon's eyes from behind a pair of tinted sunglasses, his face slightly obscured by the brimmed fedora that matched his suit. Gordon hesitantly shook the man's hand, causing the mysterious stranger to to smirk.

"Edward Nashton, sir."



"I am something of a specialist on these matters."

Gordon quizzically glanced back. "'These' matters?"

"Oh, yes. I deal with extreme personalities, you see. Serial murderers, compulsive opportunists, anarchists in the making. Even the occasional costumed lunatic, of which your 'Batman' is far from the first. They all fancy themselves to be human riddles, ready to be solved. And I assure you that I am more than up to the challenge."

Loeb slapped Gordon on the shoulder, grinning.

"You two will be seeing quite a bit of eachother, Gordon. Just remember that if he tells you to hop, you're to reply with 'how high'. Got me?"

The Captain narrowed his eyes as a clearly-pleased-with-himself Loeb headed down the hall, towards Maroni's intended room. Nashton watched Gordon's reaction carefully, as if he were scanning a book for information.

"I take it that you're no fan of Commissioner Loeb."

"You're a regular world's greatest detective.", Gordon replied. "And what division are you from, exactly?"

Nashton lowered his glasses, smugly staring back. There was something off about the look in the man's eyes. As if they were there, but there was nothing - no empathy, no disgust, no genuine feeling at all behind them.

"Let's just say that my direct superiors don't answer to any Mayor. They answer to the President. And that, I'm afraid, is all that I'm authorized to tell you at the moment."

Brandishing a walking cane, Nashton enthusiastically swung it upwards, so that it laid behind his neck.

"Really, Captain Gordon, you look as though you're suffering from stress. Allow me to alleviate some of that by sparing you of any negative predilections of my intentions, here. Despite Loeb's wishes, I am in Gotham to be your primary weapon in capturing The Batman, and nothing more. I was once a profiler for the Coast City Police Department, but I turned that trade into something more malleable with the agency I'm currently under. If you wanted to see a collection of my greatest hits, I have a file waiting for you back at the precinct that is a perennial mile long."

Before Gordon could reply, Nashton walked past him and began to stroll towards the elevator, indicating that he should follow.

"So for now, I'll let you catch me up to speed. And only take over when I see fit to do so."

The Captain stared as the bizarre man, who seemed to revel in talking a mile a minute, turned around in the open elevator and awaited him.

"To quote a classic, Captain... Shall we play a game?"

Gotham City, Financial District
1:45 PM


"Are you quite sure that you're up for this? I'm certain Mr. Dent would be more than happy to accomodate a rescheduling."



Alfred's worried tone aside, I have no reservations about meeting with Harvey for tonight's rally. Although I can't entirely say that I've fully bounced back from the disturbing imagery I was subjected to thanks to the lapsing of my own sense of reality, Bruce Wayne will nevertheless always have engagements that are more important than the whims of a brief psychological break. It's a lesson that I'm slowly learning the hard way, given it's not been easy to establish a more public version of myself that's willing to act in a manner befitting a man who could never do what I do at night, but the charade is starting to take effect. I just have to keep at it, and let everything else slip when in 'character'.

"No, Alfred. As much as I would love to miss a rally created with the express purpose of smearing my name in the public eye, we need this to happen. If I'm to be effective at what I do, The Batman has to be seen as an enemy of the law. And Harvey is my link into that world."

Alfred looks back at me through the rear-view mirror, questionably.

"Right. And the point of this elaborate game of self-ostracization is what, again?"

I look back at him, sternly.

"The police in Gotham aren't to be trusted. And that's because they're all complacent, waiting for men like Salvatore Maroni to wave a stack of money at them in order to let loose any moral obligation to protect the streets. If I turn Batman into public enemy number one, that enforces the idea that he's to be feared among the citizens. Which legitimizes the need for the police to fear him, aswell, if they're committed to playing the part of public servant."

With a scoff, Alfred makes his skepticism clear.

"An interesting theory, lad, but I've got a better one. If Bruce Wayne is seen tarnishing the Batman in public, it furthers the dividing line in suspicion. They won't think you'd actually be crazy enough to devote time and resources into running a smear campaign against yourself."

I look back out at the passing city.

"Well, it certainly doesn't hurt to cushion my alibi."

"And you're most certainly not crazy enough to actually think that this is going to do you anything but harm, either, one would hope. I was under the impression that the entire point of this crusade of your's was to appear as a symbol of hope for the city. Not a blight to be cursed at the very mention of."

"The public's never going to fully accept what I do, Alfred. And with good reason. I acknowledge the... extreme nature of what The Batman has to be.", I explain. "It's a dangerous thing to be putting myself against people like Falcone and Cobblepot, and the innocents that I'm trying to keep out of harm's way need to be separated from the very idea of supporting me even in a tangential way so that they're never put in the crosshairs for the sake of goading me. I'm not out to be anyone's hero. I'm just doing what needs to be done."

Though I can tell he wants to counter that, Alfred remains uncharacteristically silent. As he turns the corner leading onto the block to the District Attorney's office, where I'm meeting Harvey to discuss the plans for the Anti-Batman rally, my phone suddenly vibrates. I pull it out and answer, without checking who it is. Because I have a suspicion that I already know the answer.

"Bruce Wayne."

"Tell me you're not going to this ridiculous little show of Harvey's."

I sigh to myself, cursing the fact that I even picked up.

"Nice to hear from you aswell, Selina."

"Oh, please. Skip the foreplay. If you were interested, you'd be the one to call. Most sane men do, anyway."

I smirk.

"Wouldn't know anything about that. So what do you have against what Harvey's doing?"

"For one thing, it's a complete waste of taxpayer money. A stunt designed to invoke paranoia, and if Dent hasn't noticed, we're all teeming with that as is. Practically comes with the territory of living in this city."

"Well, first of all, it's not being funded by the taxpayers. I'm footing the bill on this."

"And you don't pay taxes? That isn't my point, Bruce.", Selina argues. "All of this false bravado is toxic for real issues that need to be tackled in Gotham. Engaging in a social event with the sole purpose of pointing out the obvious fact that some masked vigilante may not, infact, be the most stable individual in the world is far from where these idiots need to be lending their attention."

I nod as Alfred opens the door for me after parking, stepping out of the limousine myself. He's getting good at taking the cues for this whole 'Bruce Wayne's butler' act we've developed. I didn't even have to remind him, this time.

"I won't argue that there are more pressing concerns in the city than Batman, Selina, I just... think that he's a scary individual that needs to be dealt with. And a dangerous one, at that. Did you hear what he did to Salvatore Maroni?"

Her tone becomes more indignant.

"Like Sal has ever been a saint. I'm honestly more pissed at the Bat-creep for not shooting him in the head instead of making him a cripple."

I pause, looking at the phone.

"You don't mean that."

"And what if I do, Mr. Pacifist?", she asserts. "Look, I know that men like Maroni are generally part of the crowd you associate with these days - which, by the by, is not what I intended for you whenever I took your charity case of needing to mingle with Gotham's elite after you came waltzing back into town. But that doesn't change that whatever this 'Batman' is doing, he's doing it to the right people."

There's a bit of surprise in what I'm hearing, given that Selina is the daughter of the city's most notorious crimelord. But then again, she's never been exactly shy about how she feels about her father. Were it not for keeping up appearances and perhaps even some kind of blackmail that he has against her, I'm sure that she and Falcone would be estranged. I guess in some ways, she's playing as much of a part as I am.

"Whatever the case may be, he's as much of a criminal as any of them. And the police aren't really doing anything about it, from the looks of things, so maybe it's up to the people to take charge. Harvey's passionate about bringing him in before he inspires imitators, and I'm inclined to agree with him. We can't have a city that thrives on vigilantism ontop of crime."

"You say that like it wouldn't be more interesting...", Selina murmurs. "But fine. I'll concede that maybe, just maybe the costumed freak needs to go before he starts giving people ideas. I've already heard horror stories about the people that Carmine has seen Oswald Cobblepot entertaining, lately. It's practically a masquerade ball down at that cheaply decorated nightclub of his."

I raise my eyebrow.

Interesting. I didn't realize The Penguin was keeping colorful company.

"So you're saying you'll be there?"

"Jesus. You really can't do this without me, can you?", she replies, practically holding back laughter. "Fine. As usual, I'll come to your rescue and endow you with my sociable know-how. But you owe me. As much champagne as I can drink, on your tab, and I get to pick your suit for the Gotham Knight Gala. Deal?"

"I've seen your taste in fashion, and it's making me want to reconsider even going to that."

"Screw you, Wayne."

I smile as she hangs up.

Sometimes it's the little things.

"Good news, Alfred. Turns out The Batman has at least one supporter."
I agree that he should've stayed dead, given Morrison's entire point in killing him off was to redeem his shitty attitude towards others by sacrificing himself for the greater good in the way his father would if it came down to it, but that's neither here nor there.

(Nor a rant that I constantly go into inside of my own head.)

You died the moment you listed Grant Morrison as number 2 on your list.


Only out of the available options. I just don't like King's run, at the end of the day, while I can cite many examples of issues by the other two that I do like. Though I'm curious as to where your breaking point was.

If there were a degree in Batmanology, you know you would be the first doctoral candidate.


Professor MB, BatMD has a nice ring to it.

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