You can't say that in public!!!

[Mistiel]

No way in hell am I clicking that.
_________________________________________________________________________________

Contribution to the thread: "GO TO HELL! Oh wait, never mind. It's warm and you'll know people there. GO TO PURGATORY!"

[Jurassic Weeb]

Totally adding this status to the list (even if it isn't mine).

Pregnancy is a life changing STD

Carmine Celica

[ArenaSnow]

God's a great guy, man.

[Carmine Celica]

I think the thread has strayed from the OPs original vision...

[Mistiel]

I think the thread has strayed from the OP's original vision...

@Carmine Celica

Then maybe they should get their eyes checked. I'm blindly optimistic that that would help! x_x

[Jurassic Weeb]

Sometimes the voices tell me I should follow my dream and knife every single person I hate until they're dead… and then teabag their bodies… and then blow up their corpses… and then incinerate what's left and use it for fertilizer. :3

[anxiouscat]

Sometimes the voices tell me I should follow my dream and knife every single person I hate until they're dead… and then teabag their bodies… and then blow up their corpses… and then incinerate what's left and use it for fertilizer. :3

@Otaku95

That's some dark shit man.

[Jurassic Weeb]

And some of the other stuff people have posted isn't? "Low hanging fruit", "plane wrong", etc.?

[Vozhos]

You know what's a joke, women's rights.

[Jurassic Weeb]

Went out for a drink, and asked the bartender for a double entendre. She gave it to me.

[AlteredTundra]

Jews are smart because, when they were kids, they went to concentration camps to help them focus.

[Todd Howard]

You know what's a joke, women's rights.

@Vozhos

[Vozhos]

<Snipped quote by Vozhos>

@Raddum

[Todd Howard]

@Vozhos

That's better

[Flightless_Soul]

A guy walks up to a bar and tells the bartender, "Oh God, I think I just did the sickest thing ever."

"What?" Asks the bartender.

The man answers, "I had sex with one of my patients today."

The bartender laughs, "My cousin used to do that too when he was a doctor! No big deal."

Then the man looks up and says, "You don't understand. I'm a veterinarian!"

[SgtEasy]

How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket?

A blender

^{Im so sorry I love children}

[Jurassic Weeb]

@SgtEasy The GIF in your sig isn't making that statement any less creepy.

There's more than one way to skin a cat. I should know, since they're so delicious.

[Jurassic Weeb]

"So... we're only half-siblings?"
"Yeah. You okay?"
"I'm fine, it's just... In a way it's kinda cool."
"Really? How's that?"
"I mean, that makes it 50% less weird when I spy on you in the shower!"

[Mistiel]

You're not totally useless. You could just be used as a bad example! :)

[Jurassic Weeb]

There's one group of people best equipped to drive you to suicide, and that is your family. Happy holidays.