Hidden 15 days ago Post by RPGC
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RPGC Guild Competitions

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Character Creation Competition

Voting Details

Only one vote per person will be accepted, but feel free to give as much constructive feedback as you want to those who have entered; discussing attributes such as positives and negatives, as well as areas where improvements could have been made. From there a winner will be announced and they will be given the opportunity to choose a theme/scenario for the next round.

As a recap the details for this round will be listed below with the entries following.


CCC # 1

Theme/Scenario

This round's theme will be of someone who sails the seven seas, an adventurer who is after treasure and bounds booty, a scallywag who pillages and plunders... The theme is none other than Pirates!
Requirements

  • A pirate cannot be a pirate without a pirate name. Even if they have a real name every entry must have a title for which they are known or feared by.
Restrictions

  • No magical traits such as voodoo, witchcraft, or rune magic.
  • No superhero style abilities like what you may expect from One Piece.
  • Maritime pirates only, therefore no out of time period characters such as space pirates or steampunk.


Submissions
Hidden 14 days ago Post by Sola
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Sola rare kumiko collector

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Lasersquid captured more of my interest with his character being set in a supposed fantasy setting, yet there are instances where I have my doubts and concerns. For example, Lasersquid speaks of Anarast's parents being publicly executed being a driving factor for him, but I don't see any information regarding it within Anarast's backstory. Later on, Lasersquid says that the captain was a smart man, and "didn’t want to make the men hate him, but rather to make them know discipline." If the previous captain was supposedly intelligent, one would think whipping his crew five hundred and fifty three times in one day might not be the best course of action. Then, the incident with the pirate ship--would a group of pirates be so keen to listen to a 14 or so year old, even with his silver tongue?

These are just pieces that stood out to me the most, and other voters may have different views on the above. Also, I do believe Lasersquid forgot one of the requirements (the pirate name), unless Anarast is feared by his own real name.

Regarding Calle's sheet, I have some feedback as well. The character is simple (which is fine), yet the sheet feels more like a summary rather than an actual character sheet. I do think the history could have more of a "descriptive flair," rather than this and that happening. That being said, the history feels more believable to me than Anarast's, as Nelly seems to have more of a connection regarding being a pirate. Still, there are instances that I do think could be elaborated on in a similar vein as I mentioned before about the history. Nelly has a fear of snakes, but why? What triggered this fear? Not only that, Nelly has people she truly cares about (her father/husband/brother/etc), yet as of right now, they're nameless background characters.

Both sheets suffer from blocky text, as in sections, lines and/or paragraphs not being spaced out, but ultimately after reading both sheets, Calle has my vote. The sheets weren't awful by any means, and there were moments where I favored one sheet over the other, yet I think Calle has this down.
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Hidden 6 days ago 6 days ago Post by Karkinos
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Karkinos Cʀᴀʙ Dᴇᴍᴏɴ

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Okay, I'm LATE, but overall:

Du'brak is off the chains, and while a lot of it's fun, particularly the exaggeration of his barbarian nature (HE'LL FUCK YOU UP), I feel there's a doubling-down on his 'Genius Bruiser' status to the point where the exaggeration is impossible to relate with. Like, if he was intended to be gritty, that's a little lost in the fact that's he killed hundreds of people, seemingly with little effort. I guess I'm offset by the fact that a pirate who's indulged in horrific behavior without even an attempt to justify it under good intentions -- essentially, he's a pirate to murder - seems so well-rounded. Yeah, he can't trust people, and the guy's traumatized, like, poor baby - motherfucker killed the same guy he bought a weapon from, that's cold.

To me, a character doesn't have to be virtuous, but "relatable" in the sense that I understand where they're coming from, and why they're the way they are. So more reflection, less description of how good Du'brak is at what he is.

At the same time, though, I have to acknowledge the moments of overcompensation nestled throughout. The first line of the appearance section is a perfect example and I love it. Du'brak's personality section might be a little underused, dedicated mainly to how he can FUCK YOU UP, but I think if the rest of the sign-up made more of an effort to delve into his psyche, it would work perfectly - it would reflect an in-character lack of awareness and accountability for his actions. You just wouldn't also want to be irresponsible with a character like Du'brak. In my experience, the worst characters to roleplay with are the crazy psychopaths that go around fucking up other characters without facing consequence.

Roselips strikes me as the more internally-believable of the two, up until when she apparently sought out and joined a pirate crew - the way it's portrayed, it seems it was as easy to do as forwarding her resume to the captain!

The biggest issue with her sign-up is I can't imagine anyone treating her like a protagonist because she lacks... self; her life is described without providing insight into her as a person. It seems she's achieved her ambition of being a maritimer, too, so what else would she strive for? And just what is she like, what dynamics would she offer with other characters, other than being no-nonsense with "inappropriate behavior"?

On little details, I love how she got her pirate name, and the reference to the "woman as bad luck" superstition was a fun one, too.

Tough to choose, but I think I'm batting for Lasersquid in the end because the sign-up itself is written with more personality, and I just think you could do more with Du'brak as a character. Also helps that I'd really want to see the deeper exploration of how he ticks that I mentioned above.
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Hidden 2 days ago Post by Darth Shadow
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Darth Shadow Fastest Hands Flapper on Guild

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Well, I am just gonna make mine quick. No reason to type up a page when Sola and Karkinos have pretty much summed up what I saw in two CS.

+Du Bak is quite a fun character. Somehow reading through Lasersquid's CS, I can't help but thinking this is the "America Fuck Yeah!" turn into a character. Overall, quite fun although it would be much easier to see if you can press enter to clear the text block. But still, after reading through your line, I only have one question. How did he ensure that his pirate vessel would not fall into mutiny? Assuming that he has some mystical power which allowed him to control the boat like the Flying Dutchman in Pirates of the Caribbean, then why doesn't he just ambush and mix his pirate with the refugees. It is a much simpler task than trying to persuade a bunch of sailors that serve the king. Besides, if the captain was a smart man, don't you think he would be wise enough to beat one of his men so that he could insert the spies within the riot circle?

+I think Calle did a wonderful job when describing his/her character's appearance. I could draw out his/her character when reading the appearance lines. The history did a pretty good job of summarizing her reason to go to the sea. But I don't think that is a quite strong enough reason. Besides, I would be very interested in reading about her conversation with her husband after giving birth to their second child. Certainly, in my mind at least, that event should leave a deep mark in her life.

Well, with a few minor plot holes that I am just being nitpicking at this point, I think I will vote for Calle.
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Hidden 1 day ago Post by Briza
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Briza Plantae

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Hidden 1 day ago 1 day ago Post by SleepingSilence
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SleepingSilence OC, Plz No Stealz.

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I've come and gone from this thread a few times, looking at the character sheets and trying to come up with enough to say to have any worthy critique or comments about the sheets in question.

When it comes to the writing (vocabulary/quality) and the structure. Both of them seem pretty equal. I can imagine both of these character sheets just being a standard/typical submission in a casual pirate role play. But since there is no roleplay attached to the character sheet, which theoretically would grant you the ability to add as much detail and description and background as possible. I feel like they're both a little underdeveloped in my opinion. But that's pretty much all I have to say.

Suggestion for improvement:

Callie: The skills being a grocery list could be expanded upon and given more detail to make them feel more like a character. It's also completely subjective but not fond of the name either. (I guess the nickname is silly enough that it fits a more light hearted affair.)

LaserSquid112: The proficiency chart isn't defined. So it's meaningless without context. I do not know what the lines mean. I wouldn't know if no lines mean they couldn't use the weapon/do said task. I don't know if one line means poor and two lines mean average since it's a three line basis. I would have suggested to change it into words or description instead.

My Winner & Why: LaserSquid112's sheet had more personality and character, in the character sheet. The vulgarity, shouting and the occasional musing brought some life into the description. So he has my vote.

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