Rufus had thought he made a suitably audacious entrance, even if his landing had been a bit off course and dropped him off straight at his own castle. No real bother, just meant he wouldn't have to carry his luggage as far to get back in the throne, though this would prove rather difficult when confronted by his replacement. He held no belief that the throne would remain idle in his absence and a good chunk of his thoughts went towards what fresh horror he'd unleash on the sap sitting on his couch, only to find it all a moot point when Lucille entered through a portal to literally Nowhere.
"Green hair? Check. Plaid skirt? Check. Great chest? Check. Slime kid? Check....Well shit." Rufus rattled off without much thought, dropping his suitcases on the floor as he approached warily.
"We haven't met, but I'm going to hazard a guess and say you're the infamous Lucille. I really did not expect you of all people to take my throne, and you even brought your successor to the throne. Ehehehe, that just makes this all the more complicated, doesn't it?""Sooooo, i see you replaced my couch with an actual throne. Not a bad choice, though now I'm going to have to dumpster diving to put a new one beside that golden high chain. You don't mind sharing the space, do you?"The Black Goat's expression didn't dilute from the unamused glare, though to Rufus' safety she crossed her arms, ensuring there would be no parasol stabbing today. Yet.
"If you're smart enough to see there's new management, then you shouldn't be dumb enough to come back Rufus. Or were you expecting to blow up the first person you saw sitting in your place," she said, flicking her gaze over to Ghelgath kissing up to the former King of Hell. She didn't need to look around to sense more demons filling up the throne room, no doubt having returned from Where Nothing Gathers; she wasn't too surprised to find Fran returned among their ranks after all. Along with her were Mephilius and even Frog for a brief moment before the puppet made the wise decision of backing off until things blew over.
"And you came back here because....?""Got it in one, Goat-chan, and it looks to me that you beat me to ousting whatever lesser demon tried to take the throne. Oh, were they one of those ponces who wear capes and make grand speeches? I just love hitting them!" He said, flinging his hand back to send his own majestic garments whirling in a display of flagrant gravitas that just so happened to coincide with the entrance of his treacherous demons fresh from the battlefield. Almost immediately he was showered with praise and adulation...from an Ice demon he couldn't very well recall. He audibly gulped as said demon took up the unbidden job of being Rufus' hype man and rather gratingly tried to goad the goat into violence.
"One moment please."With a snap the ground beneath Ghelgath turned into a portal, dropping him out of the throne room and into the grand kitchens of the palace. More specifically, into an oven large enough to bake a Machina tank, and it had long since heated up to it's highest setting.
"Much better. Hear me, my sycophantic supporters. Your king has returned from his honeymoon and was totes ready to lead you onwards into glorious victory...then I saw Lucille was here," He said, finger pointed to the seaweed head,
"And realized that's not even worth the effort. Seriously, she'd shove a broom handle up my ass and mop the floor with me if we did this fairly, so she's free to keep her throne. I'm just throwing a couch next to it and moving back in. Get that? Or do I need to see how many demons get maid into Mince Meat pie today? Cause the Mrs just loves her some fresh meat, I'll tell you now~"Lucille watched the spectacle evenly, even raising an eye slightly as Ghelgath was unceremoniously dumped out of everyone's sights and into the conveniently-placed oven waiting for him. She had a feeling who was responsible for that but didn't pay it too much mind.
"I'm impressed Messenger. It seems you're not nearly as annoying to negotiate with as I thought you'd be," she mused, not bothering to care for what the other demons' reactions.
"Well, you've managed to far not to piss me off more than I usually am. Perhaps something a bit more filling can be arranged," she said, waiting for Rufus' next reply and flair.
Seeing as the ultimate sadistic creature had to yet to try and introduce his head with the floor beneath her boot, Rufus considered this a rather successful return. So far.
"I'll accept the compliment for what it is. How about we do as Demons do and work out a little deal. Having been out of the loop for awhile I can't be certain, but I don't imagine you much care for dealing with our subjects....eccentricities, on a daily basis. Perhaps we should go from Monarchy to Oligarchy and divide up the responsibility? Not like we have any reason to power play each other besides shits and giggles anyhow.""Excuse me?!?"Before Lucille could give a proper answer, the air's temperature spiked up significantly. It took most of her will not to roll her eyes, but she did turn to the side to witness a dark portal being opened into the throne room. Who else would appear but the first Queen of Hell, Ira, stepping out with malice and hate radiating behind her mask; one didn't need to see her face to make certain of the rage that was there.
"If you think you can just waltz back into Hell and claim it as your own then you have another thing coming, your majesty," she snarled at Rufus, already unsheathing her blade and holding it out to him.
"I thought you were kicked off the throne," Lucille said, adjusting her gaze to be placed on the Arch Demon now.
"Well, well, is there any more people who would want to share the spoils of ruling this dirt heap? Please, by all means, let your voices be heard loud and clear," she said, words oozing with sardonic nature.
"Woah.""Okay, Lucille I know by reputation and work, but who are you? I didn't really bother memorizing all the arch demons trying to throw their weight around beneath me." Rufus gave Ira a dull look, till a flash of recognition came as he cringed at her edgy visage.
"Oh shit, you're Hildr's father! Haha, man, that must be soooo embarrassing having the biggest whore inside and outside babylon. Is it true every albino is somehow related to her? It feels like that is true.""Woaah."Just as Ira had cut Lucille off, he cared not for what the arch demon said, and instead opened a portal above her head for an instant, loosing the frigid waters from the deepest depths of Ruthria onto her head as though to rub literal salt into her wounded pride.
"But yeah, anyone else want to try associating with us? And before you ask, Yes. That was a rhetorical question and I will kindly show you the inside of Juno's stomach if you answer in the affirmative.""Woah....""Why you son of a bitch," Ira seethed, the water quickly evaporating from her steaming form. Yet all the anger in the world was shortly put on hold when Rufus finished his speech, eyes narrowing behind her mask.
"What...are you actually proposing an alliance of which to rule Hell? Were you not the one who set those rules in place? To rule Hell only as a singular entity?""Woah!""And look how good that turned out," Lucille muttered, this time committing to rolling her eyes.
"Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah!" came the obnoxious and irritating voice of a million cats screeching in protest. Ira had a feeling who it belonged to but Lucille knew quite well what it was. A nuisance and pariah only fitting for the-
"Dun, dun, dun! Super Trash is here!" said the
girl who had plopped onto Rufus' shoulders out of nowhere.
"Woah, woah, you guys are totes making a Legion of Evil? You can't make that without me, the Super Trash of Delinquency, oh ho!" Seeing the girl alone made Lucille twitch an eye and almost consider walking out at that moment. Almost.
Contrary to the reaction of any sane being with an ounce of decency, Rufus sported a broad smile that only grew with the pitch of an approaching bandicoot, till a shark toothed blonde landed on his shoulders with a glorious declaration.
"Ah, I was wondering where you'd gone off to. Everyone, say hello to the light of my life, Dana." "Though perhaps not Legion of Evil. We're powerful, but I'd hate to piss off the Lawyers down here in Hell. Hmm, The Reagents of Chaos? Lords of Discord? A Gardener, a Evanescence CD in the Flesh, and the Goat? So many choices..." "Ooh, ooh, how about the Axis of Evil! It's the perfect flair of threatening and super edgy," Dana put in, making every effort she could to knock Rufus off balance. Ira glared as she always did at the suggestion while Lucille was left wondering what had just happened. Was it literally that easy to make an alliance? Did Hell have four leaders now?
"And I even fixed the throne problem. Ta dah!" Dana said, pointing to the back of the room to reveal four fresh new thrones for Hell's newfound government; two on each side of a wide couch.
"Quickest dethroning ever, oh ho!""Indeed it was." Unperturbed by Dana's rocking, he hefted her off of his shoulders by her tight rear and held her like a child would a stuffed animal, arms crossed across her chest when they fell upon the couch in the center.
"Behold, denizens of Hell, for you are under new governance, new to the whole of the Nexus in fact!" The entire ceiling before the thrones opened up and poured out confetti and balloons, with a banner proudly proclaiming 'IT'S A PUPPY!' in big blocky letters.
"Oh damn, I was saving that banner for Victoire. Or Deva. Could go either way there. Oh well, start rejoicing for your new leaders!" Ira and Lucille, as confused as ever, didn't see much a reason to go against this new proclamation. Such as it were then that both women sat in their respective thrones, the birth of a new reign of horror and debauchery commencing.
"....what are you idiots still standing around here for? Get back to work," she hissed to the fools who had stuck around to watch this living madness in person.
Chevaleresse,
Fetzen,
Neziul,
Villamvihar,
abc,
mickilennial,
shylarah
