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Master Bruce male Member

Winged Freak

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Bio

Very well, where do I begin?

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.

Most Recent Posts

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Roster's updated, by the way.

I added a special thanks to @Retired for reminding me.

Also, if you're not on there and were approved, the reason you're not on there is because you haven't yet transferred your application to the Characters section. That's the only real way I can keep track of who's playing who.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Such time wasted!


I don't know about that.

I mean, sure, I could've been working on a post, but I decided to do this instead.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
By the way, Andy offered to give me the answers to all of those, and I flatly said no.

Because if I'm going to play Batman, I will do my own goddamn detective work. Goddammit.



In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay


After reviewing some irregularities...

THAT CHROME-PAINTED WHINER ISN'T WORTHY OF SHINING MY SHOES! BUT SINCE I'VE GOT A NIBBLE, LET'S TRY SOMETHING.

IC PAGE 1, POST 3, PARAGRAPH 5, SENTENCE 2, WORD 9, LETTER 1


M in my first post, in the word 'more'.

HEH, THAT'S WHAT MAKES YOU BALD MONKEYS SO FUN-- YOU THINK YOU ONLY NEED TO BUILD FOUR WALLS TO KEEP ME OUT!

THIS PAGE, TWO POSTS UP FROM THE QUOTE, SENTENCE 2, WORD 1, LETTER 3


X in Lord Wraith's reply, in the word 'sex'.

GOOD MONKEY!

CHARACTERS, POST SEVEN, ORIGIN SECTION, PARAGRAPH 1, WORD 7, LETTER 4


Y in Simple Unicycle's Punisher app for the words 'Gotham City'.

DOCTOR STRANGE'S PLAYER, SCREENNAME, LETTER 6


Z in ErsatzEmperor.

TITUS ANDRONICUS, ACT II, SCENE III, LINE 7, WORD 4, LETTER 1


P in the word 'piece' from Aaron upon entering with a bag of gold.

ALAN GINSBERG'S "HOWL," PART III, LINE 8, WORD 5, LETTER 1


T in 'twelve' in the phrase 'where you’ve murdered your twelve secretaries'.

ANYWHO, WIKIPEDIA ENTRY "EUGENE IONESCO," SECTION 2.6, PARAGRAPH 2, WORD 27, LETTER 2


L in "pleasure", in the sentence "no pleasure or feeling of participation".

"FLAGPOLE SITTA" BY HARVEY DANGER, CHORUS, WORD 3, LETTER 4


K in 'sick', after 'I'm not sick but I'm not well'.

Conclusion:

M, X, Y, Z, P, T, L, K.

MXYZPTLK.

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Just wait until Joker impregnates Selina, steals the babies, and then ends up killing her


This, of course, is after Joker has already been dead for several years and had his son, Anarky, take his place in the title while Bruce had been convinced that he was a clone and handed the mantle of the Bat over to Jean-Paul Valley as The Scarlet Knight.

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
<Snipped quote by Master Bruce>

If you need to take someone's DNA, it may as well be mutually enjoyable.


Actually, in Morrison's retcon of Son of The Demon, Bruce was drugged into participating. So...

Wait, no, that'd still probably be enjoyable for him.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Damian wasn't a clone. He was a genetically engineered and scientifically perfected fetus that still required Bruce and Talia to make the dirty to create.

Totally different.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Oh, okay. I see how it is. I guess I can play this game of "stealing other peoples' mythos" too!

Y'all are gonna regret this when I start the Bat-Clone Saga! And the Bat-Symbiote Saga! And have Bruce adopt, like, five different costumed identities for some contrived reason!

In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Ten points to HenryJones for namedropping Big McLargeHuge.


Uh, I'll have you know, he referenced Smoke Manmuscle. Sir.
In CLOSED - Ultimate One Universe: Season One → 8 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Also featured is "Stupid high school kids do stupid things while overly emotional", aka the Spidey story


Calling it now...

Everything ends up very nice for the two crazy kids and absolutely nothing tragic or dramatic happens to seperate them or cause some sort of friction. They eventually get hitched, Gwen never fights crime again, and the two live happily ever after.

Am I good or am I good?
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