[OOC] RWBY : Shattered Future

[KoL]

*Whistles nonchalantly wondering when Juno will get some love.*

[Savo]

@Sho Minazuki I'm in the process of reviewing yours.

@KoL
History seems a little bit... out of the blue. As much as RWBY shows, Ozpin has accepted people into Beacon even if they haven't finished combat school at a place like Signal or if they have never attended combat school at all. But in this defense, both who were accepted were shown to be capable fighters in their own right. The test seems iffy, given the fact that she skips straight to Beacon without any prior experience other than the aptitude test.

If I did say the test was ok, why did they get back to her so late. Since they basically let her attend right off the bat, I'm assuming they not only did the test late or took who knows how many years to get back to them. If it was that important to conduct a test to see who would be a hunter, why didn't they begin testing em at a young age or if that isn't the case why did they test em at a late age? If any of these what ifs are true, how the heck did she even make a weapon?

Sorry for being so nitpicky on the backstory, it just leaves a lot of whys.

Anyways, semblance is a bit overbearing (50 meters isn't that short) and I'm pretty sure the instant teleportation can be used in the air as long as there is a bird or something in the air (I'm pretty sure that counts as solid xP). Also, instantaneous... I'm going to say nerf something here as the only thing I can see as a weakness is her getting tired, but I don't think I have a tangible amount for this part... maybe a few feet instead and make it a blink-like ability? Idk.

So rework those and you should be fine.

[KoL]

@Sho Minazuki I'm in the process of reviewing yours.

@KoL
History seems a little bit... out of the blue. As much as RWBY shows, Ozpin has accepted people into Beacon even if they haven't finished combat school at a place like Signal or if they have never attended combat school at all. But in this defense, both who were accepted were shown to be capable fighters in their own right. The test seems iffy, given the fact that she skips straight to Beacon without any prior experience other than the aptitude test.

If I did say the test was ok, why did they get back to her so late. Since they basically let her attend right off the bat, I'm assuming they not only did the test late or took who knows how many years to get back to them. If it was that important to conduct a test to see who would be a hunter, why didn't they begin testing em at a young age or if that isn't the case why did they test em at a late age? If any of these what ifs are true, how the heck did she even make a weapon?

Sorry for being so nitpicky on the backstory, it just leaves a lot of whys.

Anyways, semblance is a bit overbearing (50 meters isn't that short) and I'm pretty sure the instant teleportation can be used in the air as long as there is a bird or something in the air (I'm pretty sure that counts as solid xP). Also, instantaneous... I'm going to say nerf something here as the only thing I can see as a weakness is her getting tired, but I don't think I have a tangible amount for this part... maybe a few feet instead and make it a blink-like ability? Idk.

So rework those and you should be fine.

@Savo

I can rework her background, though it shall take sometime to do so given my IRL schedule, her semblance on the other hand is considerably less OP than you are imagining. I can decrease the range of it somewhat, but on a general PoV it's really just as effective as say, Ruby's speed.

Depending on how things go I may as well do a whole other character from ground Zero, so let us see.

[PatrickDrummer]

@Savo Yeah it's basically speed. So if you've seen any recent X-Men movie you should know about the character Quick Silver, and there was a few scenes where he was moving so fast time appeared to be extremely slowed for him. When in actuality he was just moving really fast. This should help explain what I mean.

[TheWendil]

@KoL

Couldn't you just get rid of the aptitude test bit and say she applied to Beacon like every other student? Problem solved?

[Rex]

@Savo

here is my Character:

Seth Rush

Name: Seth Rush
Age: 17
Gender: Male

Race: White fox Faunas

Appearance: picture and small description

Addition appearance:
Seth stands Five foot eleven without shoes and with shoes he’s six feet tall. He weighs 240 pounds and is between and slime and medium physique. He has candy apple red eyes, short white hair, his right fang is chipped, and it might not been seen, but he is slightly deaf in his left ear. His right arm has a tattoo of a King Taijitu staring from his shoulder and wrapping around his arm with the mouth open about to devour his hand. On his left shoulder he has a tattoo of a beowolf head. He is normally seen wearing a blue t-shirt with a design of a cross exploding from a skull as chips of bone fly from the open wound. Black jeans, black and white Nike sneakers, and around his neck is a necklace with his emblem on it.

Emblem:

Kingdom of Origin: Vale (Moon Blood village outside of Vale)

Personality:
Seth is a kindhearted individual who wants to see people happy and keep others safe. He strives to make everyone around him feel as peaceful as possible. However, his true personality is masked by his fake personality he actually shows everyone. To anyone around him Seth comes off as rude, a jerk, and someone who people don’t like to be around. He does this because he fears that his Semblance will activate and he’d attack those around him. He pushes people away because he fears he’ll hurt someone around him. So he created a nasty personality to keep people safe from himself.

History:
Seth was raised by the Moon Bloods: a clan of wolf Faunus that lives in a small village outside the city of Vale. Dagger, the leader of the Moon Bloods and a few other clan members found Seth on the path to the village after they had finished hunting for food and herbs. Seth was only three months old and sleeping inside a cardboard box. Dagger had considered leaving Seth to the elements until Serenity offered to take care of him. Dagger knew that she had recently lost her son and husband to a pack of Grimm and agreed. Even though Serenity took care of Seth like he was her own son, Seth seemed to find his way into Dagger’s hut and fall asleep on the sheep skin rug in front of the fire pit. Even though Dagger originally saw Seth as another mouth to feed and an outsider, Dagger seemed to imprint on him and he took Seth under his wing.

Dagger acted as Seth’s father and taught him the ways of the Moon Bloods. When Seth turned 12, Dagger introduced him to the Moon Bloods way of fighting called Wolf Combat: a cross between mixed martial arts and parkour. The fighting style tapped into their animal instincts to detect danger from affair and neutralize it. However, because this form of combat was crafted to be used by wolf Faunus, Seth had a hard time learning it. It took him 5 years to finally get to a high enough level to be considered a hunter in the pack. However, even though he was a candidate to be part of the hunting pack, he still needed to go through initiation. Seth could feel the butterflies in his stomach as he stood outside the forest with some of the hunting pack. The initiation called for the candidates to travel into the woods with the hunting pack and slay their first Grimm.

Seth traveled through the woods with the pack in search of Grimm. He knew the larger the Grimm the more probability he would be accepted into the pack. However, he also knew: the bigger the Grimm, the less likely he’d make it out alive. Dagger had given Seth the very same weapons he had used when he went through initiation. Two yoyo chainsaws called Wolf Bite Yoyos. Seth and the rest of the pack stopped when they heard a twig snap, then creaking; finally he turned when he heard a massive thud. Standing where the tree had fallen was a pack of Ursas. The hunting pack readied their weapons and howled as they rushed the Grimm. Seth followed suit and attacked the first Ursa he could find by flung his yoyos at the creature. The chainsaw blades moved to the outer radius of the yoyos and began to spin just before they connected with the flesh of the Ursa. The creature roared and swiped at the strings, but Seth pulled back the yoyos before the Ursa’s claws could strike. The chainsaw blades retracted back into the yoyo so Seth could catch them.

The monster roared and rushed at Seth, but the Ursa’s path was blocked when another of its kin fell in front of it with its head cut off. Seth looked to this left and smiled when he saw Dagger holding the dead Ursa’s head. Seeing him able to take down one of the creatures gave Seth a bit more confidence. He waited for the Ursa to get close and when it swiped at Seth he dodged and attacked the Grimm bear with a furry of kicks and punches. The Ursa suddenly back handed Seth into a tree and all Seth remembered was the hit and then darkness. When Seth came to, he found he was lying in a bed in the medical hut back at the village. His left arm was wrapped in bandages and the rest of his body had bandages here and there with his ribs fully wrapped. He sat up and felt a sharp pain rush through his ribs. He sat in bed for a few seconds to let the pain subside before he was able to stand up.

When he walked outside, he saw the hunting pack had skinned three of the Ursas and was starting on the final one. However, when they saw Seth they seemed to go on the defensive which caused Seth to step back. He didn’t understand why they were looking at him like he was a Grimm. Dagger had walked out of his hut and quickly calmed down the hunting pack before asking Seth to meet him in the medical hut. When he followed Dagger back into the hut, Dagger explained why the hunting pack was scared of Seth.

According to Dagger when the Ursa knocked Seth out, it activated his Semblance. Which caused Seth to become a wild animal and attack the Ursa, but no matter how many strikes the Ursa took. The creature wouldn’t go down. However, Dagger said that there was a sickly green aura around Seth that acted like armor and when the Ursa hit the aura. Cuts formed on Seth’s body, but it seemed Seth didn’t feel the pain being caused to his body. Also, it seemed with each cut, Seth grew more and more insane. Dagger could tell Seth couldn’t bring down the Grimm alone so Dagger and a few others in the hunting pack helped to take the creature down. However, when the creature was finally taken down. Seth suddenly attacked Dagger and the rest of the pack like he thought they too were Grimm.

Dagger and the rest of the pact were caught off guard by his attack and before they could subdue him, Seth had injured two of the hunting pack members. Dagger said that once the aura around Seth broke. He stopped attacking them and fell unconscious. When Dagger finished, Seth’s hands were shacking. He’d never think of attacking anyone in the village. He saw them as his family, but why would he attack them without reason? Dagger told Seth he had an inner primal rage that seemed to come out when his Semblance was activated. The problem was that Seth couldn’t control when his Semblance could be turned on or off. The thought that it might turn on while he is a sleep scared him to the bone. Dagger handed Seth a flyer for an academy that trained hunters and huntresses. Dagger told Seth that this academy would help with both his inner primal rage and the control of his Semblance.

Weapons:

Two Wolf Bite Yoyos

Weapon Type: Dust compatible (Lightning, Fire, and Ice)

Weapon Range: mid to long Range

Weapon Transformations:
Version 1: Normal Yoyos (Without Chainsaw blades around the outside) (Dust compatible)
Version 2: Chainsaw yoyos (Blades are on the outside of yoyos) (Not dust compatible)
Version 3: N/A

Semblance:
No pain no Gain: Seth’s Semblance turns off the pain receptors in both his mind and his nerves so he can fight longer and hard without feeling pain. His Semblance allows his Aura to coat him like armor so he can take more hits and dish more out. Once the aura armor is broken, his Semblance is terminated until he is able to regain enough stamina to reuse it. However, his Semblance is a double edged sword because once activated it triggers something in his mental state that causes him to go mad and attack anything and everything around him. His Semblance taps into his animal instincts and along with his madness he becomes a feral beast and losses all his humanity.

Strengths:
Ability to survive in the wild
Novice techniques in fighting style
Sense of smell
Cooking

Weakness:
Sense of hearing (Out of his left ear)
Keeping up his fake personality
Spiders (has a fear of them)
Hasn’t fully mastered fighting style
Semblance

*Relationships: N/A

Other:
Combat Style: Wolf Combat: a cross between mixed martial arts and parkour. Seth has mastered the novice portion of Wolf Combat and a few of the advanced techniques, but hasn’t fully mastered the style of combat.

@Rex

don't know if you saw mt CS

[Savo]

@Rex

Yeah, I saw it. I'll get to it soon.

@KoL

So basically it's super speed, not teleportation? If you're using it as a base to compare, I don't think that's a good comparison. Regardless, maybe I am making it out to be pretty op, maybe it is actually op, but I would say at this state, it's pretty powerful since all you need is a flat surface or some water around and boom, set to go.

Plus you haven't exactly given me the tangible amount of times she can teleport. I might be acting like a bit of a hardass about this part, but I just want to make sure on certain aspects involving number of uses and time in a semblance.

[Rex]

@Savo
ok, sorry about that

[Pyromaniacwolf]

So I'm gonna post my guy but looking over the other characters he seems a biiit too similar to Sho's character but I'm going to post him anyway.

---

Character Sheet

Basil Plagas

Name:Basil Plagas

Age:17

Gender: Male

Race:

Crow Faunus

Appearance:

Basil is tall but skinny, about 6' in height and weighing 140 pounds. He has black eyes with pin pricks of white in the centre (basically a crow's eyes) and extremely dark green hair (often mistaken for black). When relaxing or not in situations that require his skills, he will typically wear dark jeans and a almost always black shirt. When going outside or to battle he will usually wear a dark black trench coat along with the mask and hat typically worn by plague doctors, mainly to hide his eyes from racists but also because his semblance's mist can be unpleasant even for him to touch. He also carries a black satchel including dust vials ,but mainly it is of full of a variety of medicines and poisons.

Kingdom of Origin:

Atlas

Personality:

Basil is cold, greedy and vengeful, he can hold a grudge for a long time, but intelligent and dignified, if he finds himself in a losing situation , he can take the loss in his stride to improve for the future, this combined with a general distrust of people can lead to him being the first to switch sides when a situation looks grim or even go out alone if no parties support his ideals. While not unwilling to share his past with people, he does hold on to secrets for perhaps a little too long. He has a dark sense of humour.

History:

Basil was born in a small town north of Atlas, he was raised by his father, Vert Plagas, and his mother, Violet Plagas. His father taught him everything he knew about medicine and semblances. By the time he was 14 he took over his father's work as the town's only doctor. A few weeks after Basil took over his father's work the village was attacked by a roaming group of beowolves. They destroyed everything, very few of the townsfolk knew how to fight effectively and were slaughtered. Basil's mother was killed quickly, however the beowolves slashed at his father's thigh before a despatched team of huntsman brought it down. Basil quickly checked on his father after the carnage, however he realised he was bleeding out. With no medicine or bandages to help him Basil was forced to watch as his father bled out. This experience left a mark on Basil, one was an even stronger hate for Grimm than most, and the other was a distrust of the authority as he blamed their slow response for his parent's death. He used his newfound strengths to help him get into the Atlas Combat Academy. Basil ,now fueled with anger and bitterness quickly advanced through the combat academy, using his new found offensive semblance to defeat most physical challenges and his intellect to breeze through tests. While he struggled with creating his weapons he eventually created an effective set of weapons after many attempts and called them "The Bonesawers". (yes I know I'm incredibly bad at naming things). Despite his efforts he was not accepted by Atlas Academy due to his negative attitude. Not that the crow cared much. Instead he applied for Beacon where he was quickly accepted due to his fairly high skills and the school being unaware of his mind-set.

Weapons:The Bonesawers

A normal sword and a sickle with a chain attached to the hilt capable of transforming into a gun.
Dust Use: Pistol is capable of loading all types of dust as ammunition
Forms: Sickle+Sword
Pistol+Sword
Other uses: Sickle can be used as a grappling hook thanks to the chain and is capable of grappling in weak or unaware targets.

Semblance:Plague Warning

Manipulates aura so the user emits a cloud of fog . If it touches an enemy, it will either begin to damage their body, if they remain in the fog for too long,that time ranging from a few minutes if the victim has a low aura reserve to hours if they have a very large aura reserve, it will begin to do permanent damage, amputating fingers or even limbs and in rare cases killing them. The fog is a pale green fog that gradually rises as a battle continues

Strengths:

Plague Warning can potentially cripple a swarm of opponents if Basil is in a battle for long enough. Enemies with smaller aura reserves will take more damage from his semblance. If the user is skilled enough, they can direct the mist at particular areas quickly( Basil can do this but the mist moves at a fairly slow pace)
Basil has fairly large aura reserves.

Weaknesses:

Plague Warning does negligible amounts of damage to enemies with large aura reserves, the oppenent feeling a slight sting at most.
His semblance cannot tell the difference between friend and foe meaning his allies will have just as much trouble with the fog as his opponents, although Basil can direct it away from them if he notices.
Machines are unaffected by his semblance.
Basil cannot hit very hard without any weapons and even then he usually prefers to weaken his foes before engaging in one on one.

*Relationships:

Dolor the Carrion Crow (pet)- Basil's companion, he is usually used for scouting by Basil but it is not uncommon of him to be found stealing food and other items.

Other:

Basil has a knack for medicine and surgery , it is not uncommon to find him making antibiotics and other medicines, if you ask nicely he might just patch you up.
Basil has a distaste for the many governments of the world, while he would not commit acts of terrorism in times of peace, a large scale event may cause him to do so (he mildly sympathises with the White Fang, although would never join them without need or reason)

---

[Scarifar]

Hey @floodtalon, your cs doesn't have the appearance filled in.

[Flood]

Hey @floodtalon, your cs doesn't have the appearance filled in.

@Scarifar

That's strange, it used to be filled in. I need to fix this.

Edit:Minor HTML error. All better now.

[CadenGallic]

@Pyromaniacwolf
Literally read that as "Basil Pingas" at first.

[Sho Minazuki]

@Pyromaniacwolf That semblance looks like all kinds of ambiguous... I don't think it'll pass in it's current state personally.

[Pyromaniacwolf]

@Pyromaniacwolf That semblance looks like all kinds of ambiguous... I don't think it'll pass in it's current state personally.

@Sho Minazuki

Would you mind telling me how it's ambiguous? Is it the fact its a random symptom of a disease? Or have I not made it clear enough what it exactly does? If it's the former I could just make it hurt people in the mist, hurting people with weak auras worse than people with strong auras.

[Shin Ghost Note]

@Pyromaniacwolf Yeeeeeeeah, that Semblance is really ill-defined for what could be a really powerful ability. You said it'll give them a disease but don't explain what it is exactly other than it's "random" (Which, in any RP, shouldn't be in the capabilities lol). The fact that it has no real weaknesses doesn't help either.

Also,

"After Basil's aura is depleted, he can not take many hits"

@Pyromaniacwolf

... Same goes for everyone. lol

[Pyromaniacwolf]

@Mr Allen J Yeah that seems like a fair point, it actually came up abit in my last RWBY rp but it closed before I could address it. Could I possibly kinda throw out "X happens to someone with a weak aura, X happens to someone with a strong one" or would it just be easier if the same thing happened to everyone? Also, the big weakness with the semblance is that it takes some time to become a real problem, it kinda emits from Basil and needs to slowly flow towards its target, and even then throwing up mid-battle isnt inevitable death, I suppose I didnt mention its speed in the post actually.... Buuut if youd rather me rework the semblance, I should be able to come up with something.

Also I was meant to be making out Basil isn't very strong but I guess i'll remove the obvious bit and leave it at "he isnt a very hard hitter"

Any other issues you need addressed?

[Shin Ghost Note]

@Pyromaniacwolf The other thing I'm wondering about is if his Semblance will even effect Grimm. lol

I doubt it, since they're supposed to magic or whatever if I recall correctly. It may make your character useless against the Grimm.

[Pyromaniacwolf]

@Mr Allen J I did mention in his strengths it just slows them, sorry about how disorganized my CS is , I've had to take it from a way bigger ref sheet I used for Basil's original...creation. Not sure if how it affects Grimm makes and logical sense but I feel like its kind of thematic still. Once again, I'm kinda open to reworks on that front if you have any.

[Lucius Cypher]

You could just turn it into a sort of "weakens and corrode" type of thing. Mix up poison and diseases. Highly effectively against the grimm since they're more or less "Flesh and Blood" and lack an aura, but those with an aura is more resistant to it thanks to it's protective effects. Functionally, it makes the grimm more sluggish, their attacks weaker, and their defenses lower.

One of his weaknesses could be the friendly-fire potential of his disease cloud since, while most hunters are resistant against it, they could still be affected if caught in the range. An additional weakness could be that it's pretty much useless against machines, since if you're still working off the disease angle, you can't really give robots a flesh-eating sickness.

I'm guessing the general theme of his semblance is "Plague".

[Pyromaniacwolf]

@Lucius Cypher yeah that would...actually be pretty good , not sure if that would make everyone hate Basil for making the battle about 10 times more difficult for both sides to navigate but oh well.