Avatar of Altered Tundra

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5 days ago
Current A decade ago when we made that meme "get kid", this isn't exactly what we meant...
1 like
30 days ago
Do you think the reason Jesus Christ doesn't rise again is because we keep putting up crosses and he gets flashbacks on how that went last time?
5 likes
6 mos ago
Happy almost crisis!
9 likes
8 mos ago
it's not just a rock IT'S A BOULDER!...or whatever Spongebob said
1 like
9 mos ago
I will never show empathy for a bigot or a man who believed empathy is a made up term. Simple as that.
9 likes

Bio

Most Recent Posts


Location — Working around town
What I'm wearing
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"I wasn't-I mean, it's not that--"

First off, take a deep breath, Levi. You made an honest mistake, right? The restaurant was packed and everyone was in a rush. Grabbing the wrong bag by mistake in that kind of rush was an understandable excuse. Sure, it kind of tanked on the solid reputation that Levi was trying to build for himself as a DoorDash driver. And sure, maybe he was one or two more mistakes from being fired, but that didn't mean she had to be so cruel about it. Like, his name wasn't Lee. He understood that some people, when agitated, liked to bring out the nicknames.

Okay, Lee actually wasn't a bad name. To be honest, the more he thought about it, it was actually pretty killer. At least she didn't call him Vi. Kinda feminine and not exactly doing much for the kind of vibe he emits.

Levi turned around, as he was still turned around. She hit the nail on the head: he was ready to tuck his tail and run. At the very least, the driving start would prolong the agony of the bad review she was likely to leave for him. But as he did so, that dread from the anticipation only heightened when he was looking into her eyes. As pretty as she was, God was the expression on her face enough to give him nightmares. And on top of that, didn't she say she had a headache?

So, hungry, in chronic pain, and caught him about to flee? Oh yeah, this is just great! Real Chef's-Kiss-Emoji quality.

He cleared his throat and stepped forward a few feet. It might've been against his better judgment, but he's never been one to skimp on flying close to danger, especially when he knew he had to apologize. "I'm, uh, sorry. PE was packed and, well, I was seventy percent sure I grabbed the right one. But, I guess I... didn't." He laughed nervously and knew that might make his situation worse.

His mind immediately went to the retrospect of this whole situation. He knew he shouldn't have rushed, didn't matter how late he was already for his other delivery. "Oh crap!" The realization set in. His other delivery. He had to get back to his truck. "I am really sorry, but I have to--"

Cut off by the sound of what sounded something metal, Levi turned around and...he didn't know what he saw. "Is..Angel Grove's Science Convention here already?" Levi questioned, looking at his failed customer for some kind of confirmation. He didn't know if she knew. And even if she did, he doubted she'd want to tell him. She probably was still pretty peeved at him. Not that I blame her.

The weird alien cosplayer's footsteps seemed to get louder as he saw it approach his truck. "Hey! Whatcha doing here? I think the convention hall is the other way, bro--" Levi seemed to be completely ignored as he watched the guy not only go near Levi's prized truck, but he began inspecting the bed of it. "Seriously! Get away from my truck, man!"

Growing a little impatient, Levi took a step forward. There was a feeling growing in his stomach, something that was telling him it was a bad idea. He couldn't explain it but he also didn't like it when people touched his truck, never mind that's where he kept the important, top-secret package that he had to deliver.

And then he saw him lift the package up. And Levi grated his teeth together from sheer annoyance. But that's when Levi saw something rather odd. Lights were surrounding it: blue and green, like some kind of weird aura he'd seen from that ancient Anime, Naruto, he used to watch as a kid. What was obviously different was that it didn't just surround the box, but Levi watched it as it surrounded his truck too.

Yeah, that bad feeling had only intensified over ten times.

And before he even realized it, parts of his truck had exploded into the air and were heading straight for him and the chick behind him. Levi didn't think; he just acted. He ran back and tackled Jordan to the ground to shield her from the flaming part of what he assumed was his door and it flew straight through the front door of her house. Looking down at the chick who he practically saved, Levi couldn't help but feel a sudden emptiness overtake him. He was glad that she was okay, but his truck. "That was my favorite truck! What else am I supposed to drive and make a living with? My hoverboard!?" He said, glaring at the cosplayer who owed him a new truck.




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Location: Carnival
Interactions: Nala (via text) @King Kindred, Mims (via text) @viktorseier

Outfit for The Vass Siblings
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Everyone was so goddamn loud.

Of course, they were. It was a carnival, after all. Not that Malu cared one way or the other. Truth be told, she was more fixated on waiting to hear back from a certain someone, a certain best friend of hers. But Ali wasn’t responding to any of her messages. Not that she expected, oh you know, her best friend to help her endure through the hell that was this first day. But she understood the game. Malu wasn’t faulting Ali because she had this massive crush on her brother. She honestly felt that she could do way better than that idiot, but she wasn’t the type to make the girl feel guilty.

But that would involve that Ali actually disclosed it to her. Malu was smart and observant. She saw the way that girl looked at Kyle and how he practically avoided her gaze like the goddamn plague. Was it because he liked Ali too? Maybe it was due to Cass sitting near them. Honestly, she didn’t know. And if she wasn’t still so damn annoyed at Kyle for almost making her late and almost ruining her decade-long perfect attendance record, she might actually care to entertain the thought.

Good thing she wasn’t.


Nala
Fine Nala, get back to me whenever.
Nala
Just know you’re gonna owe me big time, Bish
Nala
I mean we’re binging cheesy fucking anime until I fucking puke from all the cheesiness

Well, that made her smile. And that smile brought her to the sight of her other quote-unquote ‘best friend’. She wasn’t as close to Mia, but they vibed. And through their shared traumas of their brother’s intellectually lethal Chronic Dumbass Syndrome. Side effects include the likelihood to develop psychopathic tendencies and may be prone to frequent cursing.

She had no fucking idea where on earth that friend of hers was and maybe instead of trying to find her, Malu would simply send her a text and tell her to meet her somewhere. As soon as she thought about that, her stomach had started to growl in such a loud manner that she rolled her eyes.

Guess she knew where she was heading.


Mims
Get your ass to Luis’ Tacoporium
Mims
Bitch we gettin us some tacos!

Satisfied, Malu made a beeline for that very truck, and thankfully, it wasn’t very far. Unfortunately, there was a fucking line.

They better hurry up. Malu was already cranky. If she doesn’t get her taco fix by the time Mims finds her way over, someone isn’t going to get a positive review on Yelp.

I decided to have breakfast for dinner today and that ended up being a mushroom-jalapeno omlette topped with a honey-habanero salsa. Cheese used is cheddar and munster.
Yeah you don't need to do much to meatloaf. It's one of those timeless dishes that is kinda ideal in how it's typically prepared. I use ketchup when I make it too, but my dad is on the tomato paste side, which I like too. Today we prepared it with the latter approach + some julienned peppers on top.

Though, that brown sugar meatloaf sounds kinda dope.
Tonight for dinner we had meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and roasted carrots. We didn't have any gravy, so I had to get creative. Ended up making a tasty sauce with balsamic vinegar, ketchup, salt, pepper, and honey. Might sound unusual but it went brilliantly with everything. Also had a side of garlic bread.

We ate good at Casa de metanoia today!


Badger Boa Bonding

Location — Working around town
What I'm wearing
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Levi groaned in the annoying way that he always did whenever he had a bad feeling about something.

And ever since he woke up and got into his green pickup truck, something told him that this wasn’t going to be a killer day like most were.

He didn’t know why, either. Maybe it was the weird dream of him falling into a giant hole larger than the Grand Canyon that seemed to be never ending. Like that one flight of stairs in late-game Super Mario 64 from way back in the golden years of the late 90s. Maybe it was his lack of an appetite and only eating three pieces of extra large breakfast pizza from the pizzeria just a few blocks from his apartment.

There was just something about this day that made him feel iffy. But he had to make rent this month. After falling short last month and being in the saving graces of his generous landlord, Levi knew he couldn’t deny any job, but the one he got last night set the stage for how he was feeling right now.

He had to pick up a package at the airport and, unlike other instances where he got to choose the route, there was a special request that the driver (not listed by name) took the quickest route. Not a particularly odd request and Levi didn’t question it.

So he took a right on E. Washington Blvd, he went down a somewhat straight-and-narrow street that would only take him roughly five or six minutes to get through before he had to turn to his last left. Traffic wasn’t so bad. He had to slow down a couple of times, but nothing that would take him off schedule. Based on the traffic app that he had up constantly, the path that was recommended for him front point a to point be would take fifteen minutes max, but he was ahead of schedule.

And Levi being ahead of schedule wasn’t something that happened frequently. Being someone that barely graduated high school and hasn’t found much steady work, hence why he drives for DoorDash and other similar companies. That’s why he wasn’t stressing so much. Regardless of the weirdness that this one delivery had and how he was feeling no more than five minutes ago, he was chill.

And then he got an alert on his DoorDash app. There was a local request for Panda Express.

“Wait, didn't I pass one just a few blocks ago.”

In the back of his mind, Levi knew this was a bad idea. His destination for the weird delivery was coming up on a left, but he really needed the money and it would only take ten minutes tops. Five to get to the Panda Express he passed up and five minutes to deliver it. That wasn’t much of a detour.

Well, at least that’s the rationale Levi accepted that allowed him to take an U-turn. At the red light, he accepted the order.

Levi Forrester has accepted your order
Levi pulled up to the Panda Express parking lot and the recurring theme of that bad feeling persisted, only this time it wasn’t just a feeling. The entire place was packed and Levi knew he wouldn’t be in and out in less than five minutes. From the drive-through to the inside of the restaurant, he saw a line. Sure, he had some leverage of the order being placed, but the problem he was currently facing was how many people were in front of him.

And as patient as Levi sometimes failed to be, he tried to. But trying was easier said than done when he was on a clock.

Eventually, he heard the name of the order be called and he side-stepped through a few overly-aggressive people in line. REaching forward, he grabbed the bag he believed to be his.

Levi was back in his truck and drove out of the crowded parking lot.

Levi Forrester has picked up your order.
The drive to his customer’s home wasn’t far. The drive itself took less than five minutes and whatever they ordered, Levi could smell something distinctly salty and sweet. He’s had just about the entire panda menu, so he knew the aroma orange chicken gave off. It was probably his favorite. His stomach was growling just by the smell of it.

“Don’t do it, he told himself, “not after last time!”

Yeah, last time…

Last week, Levi made the mistake of working on an empty stomach. He picked up an order of Buger King and, well let’s just say he wasn't given the best reviews. It was hell and this was actually his first day back at work since then.

So, yes his hunger and lack of control around food caused him to fall short on rent.

Yet another thing to make sure didn’t happen again.

He pulled up to the house and he checked the time.

“Not good!” He cursed himself as he realized he was fifteen minutes late on his other delivery. “Run, Levi! Run!” He grabbed the bag, ran up the concrete pathway, and rang the doorbell.

And then he rang it again.

Ring! Ring! Ring!

He was growing impatient. A sense of urgency passed through him as he just left the bag on the welcome mat and he was going to stop, but he felt a vibrating buzz in his pocket. He looked at his phone and realized there was a message from someone who worked at the Panda Express he just picked up the order from.

“What do you mean wrong order?” He looked through the order and it was chow mein, Beijing beef, and firecracker shrimp.

And it wasn’t here.

The order he had picked up wasn’t the one meant for..

“I’m going to get fired, aren’t I?”

As he turned to look back, Levi saw the figure of some attractive woman around his age who didn’t seem to be particularly pleased.

“Yep. Definitely fired.” He walked up and only gave his sincerest expression, hoping it would be alright.





Late Friday Night

A @metanoia & @BrutalBx Collaboration || Featuring Honey Badger & The Devil
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”Hey, little brother.”

In the moments after the fact, a cold stillness passed through the Honey Badger of the Southside. It was like a ghost had passed through his body and sent chills down from his spine to his Achilles tendon. It paralyzed him for what seemed like a few minutes — hours even. That kind of paralysis that one felt when the worst-case scenario that one had played out in their head had been made into a reality.

Words were exchanged and Honey Badger acted as if things were normal. He turned when The Devil had walked further into his somewhat tiny apartment, setting the duffle bags that were hoisted over his shoulder on the beat-up, old couch along the way. It was the worst kind of surreal reality moment that seemed to play out in real-time.

And then, as if it was a normal thing to do, The Devil occupied the only bathroom/shower in the apartment and that paralysis faded, forcing the Honey Badger to adjust. It was like a bad fever dream and his worst fears truly were here.

But why?

That’s the question he heard himself ask over and over again, playing out all of the potential what-if responses he might get from that man.

But he shouldn’t be here.

Yes, that’s right: he shouldn’t be here. Honey Badger was certain he wasn’t due out for a few more years. Hell, sometimes he’d frequently check online to make sure that his brother’s sentence wasn’t going to end prematurely. So what happened? Good behavior? Overcrowded? What?

In the midst of his questioning of the only person in the room who could respond: himself, like a switch, the ambiance of the creaky showerhead clicked off, as it always had done. The silence took residence in the apartment, but HB’s mind made a mental note to get that fixed...eventually.

And as his brother came out walking, a towel wrapped around his waist, they stood facing each other. He wasn’t frozen like last time, but HB didn’t say anything.

Or, at least he had intended to remain quiet. Before he could stop himself, his mouth had made the decision for him, “what are you doing here?” Honey Badger asked almost as if he had forgotten the dread he was experiencing no more than ten minutes ago.

”Well, I couldn’t exactly go to Aleyda’s could I?”It was so A-typical of Hyde to respond with such…smarm.

The man didn’t care about anything. It was the nonchalantness, the effortless cool, that was how he survived so long. He was James Dean; a rebel without a cause. It was almost endearing. Almost. Behind the handsome face and crooked smile, there was a monster: one whose name had not been spoken by the lips of anyone for a very long time. He was his namesake. He was what dwelled within every man, manifested in corporeal form; Jekyll and Hyde, Cameron and Hyde; the truth of which Robert Louis Stevenson wrote oh so many years ago.

Walking towards his brother's old fridge, the blue-eyed battler opened it up and scanned it for some form of sustenance. He settled on a bottle of Edenridge’s local beer and popped open the cap before he even took it out of the unit. He took a swig before closing the door of the fridge and returning his attention to his little brother.

”I’m assuming you’re asking how I’m out of jail? It’s really not that difficult. I was a good boy and there were too many bad boys; ergo your big brother is here. You spoke to our darling sister lately?”

There was another bout of silence as HB watched his brother make himself home, rolling his eyes at his explanation. The Boston Department of Corrections didn’t even know what kind of monster they had locked. As he did his best to not visibly cringe, he shrugged at Hyde’s comment. “Well, I didn’t wish her a happy Sunday, if that’s what you’re asking.” His brother wasn’t the only one that could be sassy. “Besides, I’ve been a tad busy. But next time she makes herself available, I’ll be sure to give her a big hug for you!” HB followed his comment with a small thumbs-up gesture.

“Busy stalking the Belmonte girl?” Hyde put his beer down onto a table and looked back towards his brother “I’ve got to admit, she’s a bit of a babe” He took a step forward and clapped his hands together “Don’t let her trap you though, Mika. That’s what they do. They get in your head and they twist you around their fingers until you can’t see straight and you do shit you don’t wanna do” He took a step back and began to breathe just a little harder; letting it become rhythmic in a way. Hyde could feel his blood getting hotter and his muscles tensing so he felt the best thing was to remember his breathing, remember all the work he had done on the inside to learn to temper the monster beneath his skin.

Well, he wasn’t stalking her, but ever the observant one, his big brother had deduced there was indeed someone he was watching more than he should have. There was no way in hell HB was gonna allow Hyde to know about Cece, though. But as he watched Hyde, he felt that old familiar sensation crawl up his back like a goddamn snake. It was the same feeling he thought was six feet under, but looking into his brother’s eyes, he saw it. It was only for a second, but the Devil was there and HB froze, but then he wasn’t.

“Relax. I know not to get shacked down. But maybe you should? Obviously not with some bimbo, but maybe taking a breather would do you some good.” Against his better judgement, Mika approached Hyde. All cursed memories aside, the history between Honey Badger and The Devil wasn’t all bad. Mika’s fucked up sense of self couldn’t turn off the part that this brother of his was at least an improvement on the other one he had.

A breather? A BREATHER?

“I’ve just spent the past few years locked up in a damn eight by four cell with nothing but time. I ain’t taking no more breathers, Mika”. Hyde turned away from his approaching brother and moved over to the clothing bag he had dumped on the couch. It was fairly empty considering he didn’t really have the time to prep for his trip away and no one cared enough to drop him any clothes off. He could feel the all too familiar feeling bubbling in his head; that distinct sound that rattled in his ear like titanis. He pulled on some clothes, with every new item, a pause for a calming breath.

Without provocation, Hyde spun on his heel, grabbed the dinner table and flipped it as hard as he could onto the floor. He raised his hands up, almost in regret and placed them against his head. “Listen, all I want is to move on with my life. Tomorrow you and me and our darling sister are going to have breakfast together, like an actual fucking family” He dropped down onto the couch and looked upon Mika with the cold blue eyes that were synonymous with the devil himself “And that’s not a request, M. You send what we code you guys have and you get her here first thing tomorrow. Am I clear?”

He froze. Not when the table was flipped or even when it seemed like Hyde was losing his mind. No, it was the calm that came after. The way that his brother glared at him, that cold stare was enough to remind HB just how much things haven’t changed. Prison didn’t change Hyde. He said he had nothing but time and something in those words painted a clear picture for HB. His brother was worse now than he ever been, but he didn’t know exactly how. There was a gut feeling and, almost always, he was right on the money about these.

As he glanced at the table that had wedged itself in a right to left diagonal angle, he shook his head at it. “Fine whatever. I’ll make it happen.” God really loves to test him. First Cece and Niles and now this.

“Good” Hyde got up to his feet and patted his younger brother across the face. “This town has taken enough from me, it’s not taking my family” He walked towards the front door and cracked it open a touch. “Now, grab your wallet. We’re going for a drink and you can tell me all about this spooky letter business. Big brother is here to save the day”

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