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Recent Statuses

3 yrs ago
Current Auld Lang Syne, everybody. roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
4 yrs ago
Vote in my new quest, Mirage, a RP quest set in the far, far future roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
5 yrs ago
Kink-Shaming. Kink-Shaming Never Changes.
3 likes
5 yrs ago
roleplayerguild.com/posts/5… Vote for Dead in Depression. The mechanics of the quest have now been posted!
5 yrs ago
Voting is open until the end of the week! Please come and vote! - roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
1 like

Bio




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Minimum Wage, Maximum Weird







GAS WAY EXPRESS CO

The Right Way, The Gas Way


DAILY EMPLOYEE MEMO

SUBJECT: WELCOME TO NEW EMPLOYEES

Welcome, new employee, to your first and last day on the job at Gas-Way Express. You've passed the reviews, you've passed the interviews, you've passed the exorcism and now you're ready to become an official member of the Gas-Way Express family, an multinational extra-dimensional enterprise! Here at the Nowhere Branch of Gas-Way Express, we distinguish ourselves from our competitors by being adaptable, innovative and focused on what we call a customer-first philosophy!

Throughout your journey, we'll help you to develop numerous life and death skills that'll help you forge new career paths and discover ones you didn't even know existed! By working together, you can ensure that your Gas-Way experience will be an unforgettable and traumatizing one!

Before we let you begin your first new exciting day, we just want to let you know that as part of the Gas-Way Express Co, your well-being and health are of the utmost priority to us other than the customers. If you experience any problems or have any complaints, simply contact us through our Employee Complaint Network! Otherwise, we look forward to working with you!

Sincerely,

The Management





The Night Shift is a satirical horror and comedy role-play where you play the role of a recently hired minimum wage worker for the supranational oil mogul, Gas Way Express. Your workplace is a lonely gas station nestled next to the I-205 in Nowhere, Nosuch County, Oregon. In the morning and the afternoon, everything is normal as it should be, barring the odd mugger or furious customer. When night falls, however, the gas station becomes a nexus for the weird, silly and strange as supernatural events began threatening the sanctity of the gas station and your life. Unfortunately for you, your manager has signed you up for all night shifts, with shift transfers being out of the question. You, along with your fellow employees, must accomplish, finish your tasks and preserve the interests of Gas-Way Express whilst contending with the horrors and eldritch anomalies that the gas station brings upon you. Failure to stop or respond to these events will result in your permanent death, or even worse, getting fired from your job.

Night Shift's system is a hybrid of a sandbox/narrative RP whereby players are free to explore the surrounding environment of the gas station. Objects present within the gas station can be interacted with and used within the narrative of the RP. Clues, otherwise known as 'Portents', will appear every so once in a while to let players know that the supernatural event remains unresolved. The portents will continue to escalate in severity if the players respond inadequately to the situation. This will eventually build up to a Doom which will have major consequences for the rest of the RP.

Players will be given roles, each of which have their own responsibilities and chores to fulfill around the station. In addition, each of these roles also has one special "Benefit" that they can use to allow them the upper edge against the possible dangers that they might face during their Night Shift. In order to use a benefit, you must type out your action in colored text in order to trigger it. Note that you can only use a benefit once per shift.




Employee Manual of Conduct and Procedure


1)Standards of Posting

All Gas-Way employees who join the RP must make posts whose content and structure fall within the guidelines as discussed below.

- All posts must be formatted in third person tense.
- All posts must be a minimum of three paragraphs or longer.
- All posts must not contain content or material that violate RPGO standards. Sexually risque interactions must be done in private messages with consenting users.
- There is no strictly mandated posting order, but employees are forbidden from making multiple posts in a row without the consent of the manager.

2)Standards of Employee Interaction

During your stay at the Night Shift, we will inevitably attract different employees of different dispositions. All discussions that occur within the OOC or outside of the IC must adhere to the following rules.

- Treat all employees with respect and dignity.
- Don't be an asshole.
- If you have any concerns about or have any problems with other employees, please contact me privately and see if we can come to a solution.
- Don't be an asshole.
- There is a difference between a fruitful discussion and a long drawn out argument. Arguments will stop being arguments when the manager says so.
- Don't be an asshole.

3)Activity Standards

We, at Gas Way Express, understand that not every employee's schedule is the same. We appreciate and celebrate the diverse lives of our employees as much as we do their diverse backgrounds. However, we also expect employees to maintain a work life balance. Therefore, negotiations with your manager on acceptable work hours and your shift times must follow standards as listed below.

- Employees are expected to post at least weekly or bi-weekly. Being able to post frequently is encouraged.
- If an employee must take a break from posting or is unable to post, they must communicate to the manager beforehand in a timely manner. Failure to do so will result in possible dismissal.

4)Employee Expectations

We, at Gas Way Express, expect the highest standards of behavior and work from our employees, just as our dear customers would. Therefore, each employee is expected to observe these following rules.

- Participation and discussion of the narrative is heavily encouraged.
- Private collaborations with other employees are encouraged.
- The RP is a mystery as well as a horror RP. The onus is on the players to respond to and interact with the environment set out by the manager.

5)Other Rules

- A discord channel, at this point of time, is not currently under consideration. All OOC discussion will occur in thread.
- If an employee has any other inquiries that remain unresolved after consulting this manual, please contact your manager for further assistance.

Gas Station Layout




1. The Store


The shelved cornucopia of chronic health conditions, western obesity and one-dollar knick knacks. The fridges to the left of the counter store your regular poisons and carbonated corn syrup goodies. Glass windows provide a scenic view of the outside pumps and the surrounding desert. Coffee machines, microwaves and a malfunctioning slush dispenser are available on the store counter for usage.

2. The Pumps


A series of old and weathered fuel pumps shadowed over by an old and weathered pavilion, protecting the heart of the station from the harsh adversities of Nowhere. The keypads on the pumps are inscribed with hieroglyphic symbols and arcane languages from another era, Management's attempt at integrating credit card terminals into the station's pumps. A soda machine on the outside of the store awaits those seeking to parch their thirst, although, it is often filled with strange foreign beverages.....

3. The Parking Lot


Located on the outskirts of the station, north of the Pumps. The station sign directs lonely travelers to this strip of concrete. A menagerie of vehicles remain eternally abandoned here, ranging from dusty to old and decrepit. Some cars look as if they'd been left here for centuries.....

4. The Dumpsters


The rot that pervades here is choking, accompanied by an orchestra of buzzing flies. The scent here is a mixture of decay and festering waste that burns your throat. Some of the garbage bags jostle and move, something lurking underneath the pile....

5. The Expanse


A land of disparity and harsh extremes, burning in the day, freezing in the night. Saguaros dot the landscape like silent guardians. You wouldn't want to walk out here alone and get lost.

6. The Highway


If the pumps are the heart, the highway is the blood that fuels the station. The I-205 runs through Nosuch County and into the middle of Nowhere, both literally and figuratively.

7. The Behind


As far as official policy goes, anything can happen behind gas station premises. Eclectic graffiti and tags covers the walls, the ground is littered with refuse and detritus and you can often find a person or two leaning back against the wall. Who knows what kind of deals are brokered here?

8. The Restrooms


No one maintains it anymore. You're not even sure you can call the walls white. The mirrors are cracked, the paper towel dispensers are constantly soaked and your feet always splash in a puddle. Don't even get started on the funky odor that comes from the stalls....

9.The Stockrooms


Dry Storage. Cold Storage. Utility rooms. Junk. Management's written these areas off the books. No one really cares about what you do here. Don't mind the oddly shaped silhouettes in the Freezers or the military grade containers in Dry Storage. Whatever you do, just keep them out of sight of the customers, but never confuse it for messing with store supplies.

10.The Backdoor


A place where you and your fellow employees can rest and relax from the public eye. A cubby drawer stores all your items whilst a radio and TV serve as your only forms of entertainment. Wi-Fi password is for the assistant manager's eyes only.

The Altar
DOES NOT EXIST

The Basement
DOES NOT EXIST

Looking For Help - Positions Open!


Gas-Way Express Co is currently looking to hire people for the following positions at the Nowhere Branch based in Nosuch, Oregon.

Open Positions and Responsibilities

Assistant Manager
Minimum Qualifications: Graduate/BSc

Responsibilities

- Ensure team cohesion and cooperation.
- Assist with all clerical work.
- Ensure that establishment is secure after the end of the shift.

Benefit

You have the ability to call Management once every shift to provide advice or for assistance. Repeated attempts to call Management will result in your pay being deducted. This will result in an extended collab with the GM.

Cashier
Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- To serve any and all clients with a friendly smile!
- Close out register
- Refill food stations
- Ensure that coffee machines are maintained.

Benefit

Due to a lack of spare change, you can request once per shift for any customer making a purchase to give you something of equal value to the item they are purchasing from the Store. This can be done in response to any GM post.

Stock Clerk

Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- Assist with arrival of incoming shipments.
- Ensure the cleanliness of establishment.
- Restock shelves

Benefit

Management has given you sole access to the key codes of the storage lockers within the Stockrooms. Using your benefit allows you to open one of these storage lockers per shift and procure one item from within it. Attempting to open more than one storage locker from the store room will result in serious consequences from Management. Gas Way Express does not take misuse of its resources lightly. In order to determine the item, you must use a randomly rolled six digit code. You can also give this benefit to other players to use it on your behalf.

Pump Attendant

Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- Attend to the gas pumps.
- Change gas prices on the outside signboard.
- Sweep all trash away from the fuel stop to the Highway.
- Take tank readings.

Benefit

Through the power of belief or sheer luck, you are able to fix one item per shift to pristine condition without knowing how to. Attempting to fix something without prior knowledge will most likely result in you breaking it more. This can be done in response to a GM post.

Starting Wage: $10.05/hour, $12.15/hour for Assistant Manager (Non-negotiable)

To apply, please send an electronic copy of your CV and a recent photograph taken within one to two years to: gaswayexpress_employeecare.org. All CV's must follow the guidelines as below. Candidates are free to alter the format below within certain limits.

CLOSING DATE: FRIDAY, 13th October, 2009

@Commander Bork I'm totally getting Happy's Humble Burger Barn vibes.


This was totally my intention. Glad you saw the inspiration for this concept!

secretly searches up on Google what the heck is a Happy Humble Burger Barn.
Well, then. Since it looks like this idea has accrued some sizable interest, I am straight at work on making an OOC for this outlandish idea. It will most likely be available a few days from now, barring any unforeseen circumstances.

Minimum Wage, Maximum Weird







GAS WAY EXPRESS CO

The Right Way, The Gas Way


DAILY EMPLOYEE MEMO

SUBJECT: WELCOME TO NEW EMPLOYEES

Welcome, new employee, to your first and last day on the job at Gas-Way Express. You've passed the reviews, you've passed the interviews, you've passed the exorcism and now you're ready to become an official member of the Gas-Way Express family, an multinational extra-dimensional enterprise! Here at the Nowhere Branch of Gas-Way Express, we distinguish ourselves from our competitors by being adaptable, innovative and focused on what we call a customer-first philosophy!

Throughout your journey, we'll help you to develop numerous life and death skills that'll help you forge new career paths and discover ones you didn't even know existed! By working together, you can ensure that your Gas-Way experience will be an unforgettable and traumatizing one!

Before we let you begin your first new exciting day, we just want to let you know that as part of the Gas-Way Express Co, your well-being and health are of the utmost priority to us other than the customers. If you experience any problems or have any complaints, simply contact us through our Employee Complaint Network! Otherwise, we look forward to working with you!

Sincerely,

The Management





The Night Shift is a satirical horror and comedy role-play with supernatural elements where you play the role of a recently hired minimum wage worker for the supranational oil mogul, Gas Way Express Co. Unbeknownst to you, this gas station becomes a hub for the eldritch, the horrifying, the anomalous and weird during the Night. It's up and your fellow employees to you to preserve the interests of Gas Way Express by holding off the threats of the strange and silly until the next day shift. Failure to do so could result in your permanent dismissal and future barring of employment from all Gas Way related outlets.

Night Shift's system is a hybrid of a sandbox/narrative RP whereby players are free to explore the surrounding environment of the gas station. Objects present within the gas station can be interacted with and used within the narrative of the RP. Failure to respond to or solve events during your shift will result in permanent consequences that will dramatically shift the nature of your next night shift.

Players will be given roles, each of which have their own responsibilities and chores to fulfill around the station. In addition, each of these roles also has one special "Benefit" that they can use to allow them the upper edge against the possible dangers that they might face during their Night Shift. In order to use a benefit, you must type out your action in colored text in order to trigger it. Note that you can only use a benefit once per shift.




Employee Manual of Conduct and Procedure


1)Standards of Posting

All Gas-Way employees who join the RP must make posts whose content and structure fall within the guidelines as discussed below.

- All posts must be formatted in third person tense.
- All posts must be a minimum of three paragraphs or longer.
- All posts must not contain content or material that violate RPGO standards. Sexually risque interactions must be done in private messages with consenting users.
- There is no strictly mandated posting order, but employees are forbidden from making multiple posts in a row without the consent of the manager.

2)Standards of Employee Interaction

During your stay at the Night Shift, we will inevitably attract different employees of different dispositions. All discussions that occur within the OOC or outside of the IC must adhere to the following rules.

- Treat all employees with respect and dignity.
- Don't be an asshole.
- If you have any concerns about or have any problems with other employees, please contact me privately and see if we can come to a solution.
- Don't be an asshole.
- There is a difference between a fruitful discussion and a long drawn out argument. Arguments will stop being arguments when the manager says so.
- Don't be an asshole.

3)Activity Standards

We, at Gas Way Express, understand that not every employee's schedule is the same. We appreciate and celebrate the diverse lives of our employees as much as we do their diverse backgrounds. However, we also expect employees to maintain a work life balance. Therefore, negotiations with your manager on acceptable work hours and your shift times must follow standards as listed below.

- Employees are expected to post at least weekly or bi-weekly. Being able to post frequently is encouraged.
- If an employee must take a break from posting or is unable to post, they must communicate to the manager beforehand in a timely manner. Failure to do so will result in possible dismissal.

4)Employee Expectations

We, at Gas Way Express, expect the highest standards of behavior and work from our employees, just as our dear customers would. Therefore, each employee is expected to observe these following rules.

- Participation and discussion of the narrative is heavily encouraged.
- Private collaborations with other employees are encouraged.
- The RP is a mystery as well as a horror RP. The onus is on the players to respond to and interact with the environment set out by the manager.

5)Other Rules

- A discord channel, at this point of time, is not currently under consideration. All OOC discussion will occur in thread.
- If an employee has any other inquiries that remain unresolved after consulting this manual, please contact your manager for further assistance.

Gas Station Layout




1. The Store


The shelved cornucopia of chronic health conditions, western obesity and one-dollar knick knacks. The fridges to the left of the counter store your regular poisons and carbonated corn syrup goodies. Glass windows provide a scenic view of the outside pumps and the surrounding desert. Coffee machines, microwaves and a malfunctioning slush dispenser are available on the store counter for usage.

2. The Pumps


A series of old and weathered fuel pumps shadowed over by an old and weathered pavilion, protecting the heart of the station from the harsh adversities of Nowhere. The keypads on the pumps are inscribed with hieroglyphic symbols and arcane languages from another era, Management's attempt at integrating credit card terminals into the station's pumps. A soda machine on the outside of the store awaits those seeking to parch their thirst, although, it is often filled with strange foreign beverages.....

3. The Parking Lot


Located on the outskirts of the station, north of the Pumps. The station sign directs lonely travelers to this strip of concrete. A menagerie of vehicles remain eternally abandoned here, ranging from dusty to old and decrepit. Some cars look as if they'd been left here for centuries.....

4. The Dumpsters


The rot that pervades here is choking, accompanied by an orchestra of buzzing flies. The scent here is a mixture of decay and festering waste that burns your throat. Some of the garbage bags jostle and move, something lurking underneath the pile....

5. The Expanse


A land of disparity and harsh extremes, burning in the day, freezing in the night. Saguaros dot the landscape like silent guardians. You wouldn't want to walk out here alone and get lost.

6. The Highway


If the pumps are the heart, the highway is the blood that fuels the station. The I-205 runs through Nosuch County and into the middle of Nowhere, both literally and figuratively.

7. The Behind


As far as official policy goes, anything can happen behind gas station premises. Eclectic graffiti and tags covers the walls, the ground is littered with refuse and detritus and you can often find a person or two leaning back against the wall. Who knows what kind of deals are brokered here?

8. The Restrooms


No one maintains it anymore. You're not even sure you can call the walls white. The mirrors are cracked, the paper towel dispensers are constantly soaked and your feet always splash in a puddle. Don't even get started on the funky odor that comes from the stalls....

9.The Stockrooms


Dry Storage. Cold Storage. Utility rooms. Junk. Management's written these areas off the books. No one really cares about what you do here. Don't mind the oddly shaped silhouettes in the Freezers or the military grade containers in Dry Storage. Whatever you do, just keep them out of sight of the customers, but never confuse it for messing with store supplies.

10.The Backdoor


A place where you and your fellow employees can rest and relax from the public eye. A cubby drawer stores all your items whilst a radio and TV serve as your only forms of entertainment. Wi-Fi password is for the assistant manager's eyes only.

The Altar
DOES NOT EXIST

The Basement
DOES NOT EXIST

Looking For Help - Positions Open!


Gas-Way Express Co is currently looking to hire people for the following positions at the Nowhere Branch based in Nosuch, Oregon.

Open Positions and Responsibilities

Assistant Manager
Minimum Qualifications: Graduate/BSc

Responsibilities

- Ensure team cohesion and cooperation.
- Assist with all clerical work.
- Ensure that establishment is secure after the end of the shift.

Benefit

You have the ability to call Management once every shift to provide advice or for assistance. Repeated attempts to call Management will result in your pay being deducted. This will result in an extended collab with the GM.

Cashier
Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- To serve any and all clients with a friendly smile!
- Close out register
- Refill food stations
- Ensure that coffee machines are maintained.

Benefit

Due to a lack of spare change, you can request once per shift for any customer making a purchase to give you something of equal value to the item they are purchasing from the Store. This can be done in response to any GM post.

Stock Clerk

Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- Assist with arrival of incoming shipments.
- Ensure the cleanliness of establishment.
- Restock shelves

Benefit

Management has given you sole access to the key codes of the storage lockers within the Stockrooms. Using your benefit allows you to open one of these storage lockers per shift and procure one item from within it. Attempting to open more than one storage locker from the store room will result in serious consequences from Management. Gas Way Express does not take misuse of its resources lightly. In order to determine the item, you must use a randomly rolled six digit code. You can also give this benefit to other players to use it on your behalf.

Pump Attendant

Minimum Qualifications: Intermediate


Responsibilities

- Attend to the gas pumps.
- Change gas prices on the outside signboard.
- Sweep all trash away from the fuel stop to the Highway.
- Take tank readings.

Benefit

Through the power of belief or sheer luck, you are able to fix one item per shift to pristine condition without knowing how to. Attempting to fix something without prior knowledge will most likely result in you breaking it more. This can be done in response to a GM post.

Starting Wage: $10.05/hour, $12.15/hour for Assistant Manager (Non-negotiable)

To apply, please send an electronic copy of your CV and a recent photograph taken within one to two years to: gaswayexpress_employeecare.org. All CV's must follow the guidelines as below. Candidates are free to alter the format below within certain limits.

CLOSING DATE: FRIDAY, 13th October, 2009


So, how many people would you want to have in this group? I can only imagine there's so many people working a graveyard shift


Interested for sure. Are we all part of this night shift? Like the guy above me said, in every continence store I’ve seen there’s only one or two poor bastards there.


There are essentially 4 or 5 specific jobs that I have in mind right now which means it's going to be a fairly small group. Instead of you deciding your own jobs, I'm essentially giving players specific jobs and duties during the shift.

<Snipped quote by Commander Lazer>

What is that strange creature standing in the shadows of pump #1?

What unholy force hath dimensionally-shifted all of the Mars bars?


1) A octanovore scout from the local celestial body of Segue 1.

2) Demonically cursed expiry dates.

Minimum Wage, Maximum Weird






GAS-WAY EXPRESS CO

The Right Way, the Gas Way


DAILY EMPLOYEE MEMO


SUBJECT: WELCOME NOTICE FROM MANAGEMENT

Welcome, new employee, to your first and last day on the job at Gas-Way Express. You've passed the reviews, you've passed the interviews, you've passed the exorcism and now you're ready to become an official member of the Gas-Way Express family, an multinational extra-dimensional enterprise! Here at the Nowhere Branch of Gas-Way Express, we distinguish ourselves from our competitors by being adaptable, innovative and focused on what we call a customer-first philosophy!

Throughout your journey, we'll help you to develop numerous life and death skills that'll help you forge new career paths and discover ones you didn't even know existed! By working together, you can ensure that your Gas-Way experience will be an unforgettable and traumatizing one!

Before we let you begin your first new exciting day, we just want to let you know that as part of the Gas-Way Express Co, your well-being and health are of the utmost priority to us other than the customers. If you experience any problems or have any complaints, simply contact us through our Employee Complaint Network! Otherwise, we look forward to working with you!





The question wasn't why your only choice of employment was a run down gas station in the middle of Nowhere but rather how you managed to get here in the first place. Bills to pay, student debt, loans, a lack of choice..... Whatever the case, your decisions led you here to a job that has large demands but pays little.

Situated in the middle of Nowhere, Oregon; this gas station's only companions are the endless doldrums of the desert expanse and a single, thin highway that slices through the heat. The nearest town is a little over a hundred miles away. A work bus is responsible for picking you up and drops you for your bi-weekly day and night shifts.

You notice something off, though. The station is ancient in the way temples or ruins are. You not only see its age in the weathered bricks and old moldy posters drooping off the walls but you can feel it. Something pervades this station; whether good or bad. As you enter the station, you barely have time to shake hands with your fellow employees before they brush past you in a hurry, tired, hungry looks on their faces.

You frown. They didn't look hungry or tired. They looked scared, haunted. Looking as if they'd walked out of a war-zone rather than a boring 24 hour job. They must have been guys from the last night shift.

How bad can one Night Shift be?




What's Night Shift about?

To put it simply, Night Shift is a roleplay where you are an ordinary schlub working as a gas station attendant out in the middle of Nowhere, Oregon. During the day, everything runs as normally as you would expect. During your night shifts, things become strange to say the least. As an employee, you must complete all your tasks and ensure the gas station remains in operational capacity whilst contending with the weird and awful from possessed soda machines to versions of yourself from an alternate reality. The possibilities are freaky and endless out in the Night.

Where's the lore?

There is no lore! There is no unifying concept of world-building in the RP nor any aspect of sanity other than the fact your character is living in a world similar to our own reality and that the gas station is a nexus for eldritch and anomalous behavior.

What's the rules?

The standards of most RPGO roleplays apply here which means no god-modding, no power-gaming etc. This will be expanded on in the OOC thread but guys, c'mon, is this really the RP to post your NSFW writing in?

Where's the character sheets?

To be posted in the OOC once I have gathered enough interest.

What if I have more questions?

Simply post them in this interest check so I can rectify them.

Anyway, I'll leave this here for now. Please let me know whether or not you are interested.
In Forsaken 6 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Seeing the glass explode in the Genasi’s hands wasn’t the kobold’s usual idea of an answer. The lizardkin appeared to shrink further and further as the venom of the Genasi’s sarcastic retorts sunk in. Lak Lok meekly raised his stubby little hands apologetically in response to the Genasi’s anger. He’d misunderstood the situation entirely. How could he have been so foolish to force his assumptions?

They weren’t fiances.

They were exes.

“ My mistake, madam.” Lak Lok coughed, scooting as best as he could away from the firey demon woman. The temperature around her was beginning to grow sweltering hot, even by the standards of lizardfolk. Returning to sip on his spring water, Lak Lok decided to keep his revelation to himself for the time being, lest he was incinerated by a fireball. Luckily, the rest of the group came to join them, sitting next to each other on the bar stand. He scooted away from the Genasi to join the rest of the company. Listening to the conversation, Lak Lok rubbed his scaly chin, mulling over the proposed plans of the ginger haired human. This web of mysteries was like trying to crack open a boiled cave crab. Clawing for those last pockets of meat, tucked away in the shell whilst contending with the hideous architecture of crustacean physiology.

The first and second plans weren’t his forte. Socialising was not one of Lak Lok’s strengths unless someone counted eviscerating amateur cooks verbally as evidence. But they did provide safety in lieu of the third plan. Venturing out in the wilderness on some gamble had its own risks in the form of getting mauled by a 9 foot tall unicorn bull.

Decisions, decisions. Yet, it was ultimately up to Garrakg. Grasping his book, Lak Lok prayed hard to himself, whispering forgotten canticles and prayers in honour of Garrakg, for an answer, a sign for which path he should follow.
Lord Garrakg, would it be right for me to beseech Mr Garrick’s bethr-

There was a shout to Lak Lok’s right as the steamed eel began writhing on the plate before exploding in a dwarven couple’s face.

Then, perhaps, going to the authorities would be best -

A strangled noise of tangled air erupted behind Lak Lok. As he turned around, he saw a minotaur writhing and gasping on the floor, choking on what appeared to be an owlbear sausage.

Then, it would be venturing out into the wilderness, my lord?

He waited for any response. None. Lak Lok then spoke up.

” I volunteer to go out into the wilderness, madam.” He then coughed. “ I agree with the human’s proposition. Dividing tasks amongst ourselves will be faster - “

A familiar reedy voice then interrupted Lak Lok in the midst of his speech. It was that filthy half-elf waiter again.

“ Y-your m-meal, sir.”

Lak Lok looked at the freshly steaming descaled hydra flank served in front of him. It was garnished with wild beets and a particularly pungent beer butter. The kobold's forked tongue flickered out, tasting the scents that arose from the beat before cutting off a portion of the hydra flank. Chewing it slowly, there was no discernible reaction on the kobold's face. The half-elf waiter then spoke up.

“ Is this meal to your satisfaction, sir?”

Grabbing the half-elf waiter’s ponytail, Lak Lok pulled him down and lowered him to observe the cut flank of hydra.

“ Medium, sir. ” The half-elf said, unsure of himself.

Again, with almost demonic strength, Lak Lok began throttling the half-elf waiter whilst shouting into his ear.

“ IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MEDIUM RARE ,YOU INCOMPETENT DUNG HERDER!”

“ I will forgive you for your insolence one time. Be certain of this. If I come to this establishment again and misinterpretation of my meal occurs again…” From out of the satchel hung around his back, Lak Lok pulled out an oversized rifle, the bore of which almost enveloped the waiter’s head. “ I will make you my next meal.”

The half-elf waiter immediately ran off. Lak Lok stuffed the rifle back into his satchel and continued talking to the group as if nothing had happened.

“ I am sorry. As much as I would like to contribute more to this discussion, I must decline at this moment. However, in order for me to function at the best of my abilities, my patron demands that I must fully enjoy, savor and digest this meal. Excuse me while I pray to Garrakg for our safety throughout our quest.”

Lak Lok then returned to his meal, fully focused on devouring and consuming his lunch in honour of his god, with teeth crunching gusto, not paying much mind to the discussions of the group.
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