Lauder

𝕮𝖔𝖎𝖓𝖘 - Chaos and Order

@Opposition

Awesome! I’ll get to work on a sheet when I have the chance!

𝕮𝖔𝖎𝖓𝖘 - Chaos and Order

Hey there, are y’all still accepting new players? I’d love to get a sheet up to try and join!

[Jedi] Tython

_{In Collaboration with Bea}

---

San Anin excused herself from Kyla and Satele, who had the more important task of interrogating the dark sider and the other padawan. San Anin had no interest in being a part of those deliberations, merely wishing for the day to end and for her mind to finally be at ease for even a few moments. As such, she made her way through the temple before finally arriving back at the library, where this mess had begun for her, where she first felt the disturbance in the force. For a moment, she stood in the doorway, blankly staring into the room before stepping away and continuing through the halls of the temple, more like a droid on a set path rather looking for anything meaningful to do.

The padawan then looked out one of the many windows along her travel, taking a moment to look at the wilderness of the planet for some time. San Anin ran a hand along the ledge before climbing onto it, sitting with legs crossed as her hands resting in each other. Despite the turmoil the planet had faced, the emotions that she had discovered within other people and herself, the wilderness held a calm. She watched and watched, merely taking in the sight before releasing a singular long sigh and tilted her head towards the sky. Her eyes closed and her breathing came to a slow as she focused on the force.

The memories of her old master, and the new memory of the death of the Jedi Knight were still fresh, but San Anin knew that they were as they were. Those deaths were in the past, and while she could have prevented them, she knew that she had to let go at some time. It would be in her best interest to, but knowing that she could have helped more kept those memories rotted in her mind along with the associated emotions. The Kel Dor did not feel that she was quite ready to, instead opting to push the memories back by allowing her mind to focus all of its efforts on the force and the calming presence of the outside. Perhaps for one of the only times in the few hours of the day, she had come to establish order in her mind, and keep her emotions in check, just as her master would have wanted.

“We all have our bad days, San.”
Brye’s voice came from further down the hall, the older Padawan having decided to wander as well as she reflected on the day’s events. It was true, at least Brye thought it was, that many great Jedi, even her master Satele, all faced challenges along the way. Whether they be emotions, morals and values, or difficult decisions, each Jedi was waging their own war within.

“I’m glad to see you up and about.” Brye continued, walking to stand next to San as she sat on the ledge. Brye placed a hand on the younger Padawan’s shoulder for a brief moment, giving her a short but confident smile before Brye too gazed out at the wilderness.

San Anin was silent for a moment before turning her head to Brye, her goggled eyes peering into those of the other padawan for a moment. She let out another sigh as she turned her head back towards the wilderness, slouching forward as she relaxed around her friend. It was a moment before she decided to speak, her voice calm with sadness continuing to hold its grasp, “This wasn’t just a bad day, it was horrible.”

Her gaze shifted downwards, “I had to watch another person die when I could have stopped it.”

Brye watched San for a few moments, her gaze filled with worry and concern for her younger friend. She leaned forward and rested her elbows on the ledge as she gazed back out at the wilderness.
“I’m not sure if I ever told you, or if you heard from somewhere else… but I my old Master was killed as well, and I too feel I could’ve stopped it.” Brye said, taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly as old memories came back.

“Two rogue Sith attacked our ship and followed us down to the planet after we crashed. Master Lonn had been hit hard, he wouldn’t wake up,” Brye paused again as she took another deep breath. It was a topic she did not think about often, and rarely talked about.
“One of the Sith held me back while the other killed Master Lonn where he lay. He didn’t have a chance, and I- I wasn’t strong enough to overtake the Sith. Afterwards that’s when they threw me around a bit, and then Master Shan was just, there.”
Brye went silent, watching the outside world as she thought back on her feelings, and that horrid day.
“Things happen, San. Things you can’t control. Not because you aren’t strong enough, but because it is the will of the Force. That’s what I think. All you can do is reflect on them, learn from them, and keep going.”

The older padawan looked back to her friend again, a weak smile on her face. “One day you might be in the same position as Master Vondin. You too might have a Padawan that’ll need guidance, and then you’ll look back on today and remember how hard it was for you, and you’ll be able to help them.”

San Anin nodded her head, taking in the words of her friend.

“That was why I went to strike down the dark sider, just so nobody else would be hurt and I would be able to help more than I had. Master Kyla said that I shouldn’t let the past control me, but when you watch two people die in front of you, when you could have done something to stop it, it's hard. Letting go… it seems like that is something I can’t do. Between, Master Vondin, Knight Elav, my family...” San Anin brought her knees up, wrapping her arms around her legs and staring off into the outside.

“I can’t let go,” she said.

"You don't have to let go." Brye responded, still gazing out at the wilderness. "But you also can't keep those emotions cooped up inside. You have to release them, the proper way. Meditate on them, remember the Lighter times, let the Light Side of the Force be with you and remember the good memories. You don't have to let go of their memory San, but you must let go of the pain that you endured because of them."

There were a few long moments of silence as Brye thought of what was best to say. "I suffered from some horrible grief after my Master was killed. But Master Shan pulled me out of those emotions and helped me recover. You must look to those still here San, look to those you care about for help and guidance through this."

San Anin looked to Brye for a moment, wanting to take the words to heart but remembering all the pain that those memories had brought. “But it hurts to remember. I have been trying to keep all of those thoughts hidden away, but they only come back when I experience something similar. I can’t face them, I don’t want to face them.”

She let out a sigh, tightening her grip around herself, “Why can’t things be like when we were younglings? It was simpler and there wasn’t the risk of death.”

"There's always that risk San." Brye said, gently putting an arm around her friend’s shoulders. "Everyone must take their turn. But as each of us face our own challenges, we have others there to help us. We protect each other." Brye took her arm from San's shoulders and sighed. Brye had faced many of these fears a couple years ago, as Satele helped her through her own grief, through her fears that were developed from her Master's death. "I once had problems with my own emotions, sometimes I still do. But you don't have to face them alone, San. It is vital that you face them… but at your own pace, and never alone." She paused for a second and looked at San, "I'm always here for you should you need help to get through them. Just like Master Shan and Master Vondin. You have plenty of those who care about you to help you through this."

A moment of silence fell upon the two as San Anin looked away from the other padawan and out to the serene wilds. “Thank you, Brye,” she said softly without shifting her gaze, slowly uncurling herself and going back into a meditative position. She allowed for another moment to pass before turning her head towards her friend.

“Would you like to meditate with me?” She asked.

Brye hoped San took her words to heart. The older Padawan didn't want to seem like she was preaching or saying that every Jedi dealt with the same issues San did, but Brye truly believed in ever word she had said. She had learned from her own experience.

At the offer to join her, Brye smiled softly and nodded.
"I would love to, San."

The older Padawan climbed up next to her friend and crossed her legs, getting comfortably into a meditative position. She smiled again at San before closing her eyes and letting her mind wander.

The Hanged Man [A Darkest Dungeon Inspired RP]

@WXer

I'd allow it! Go ahead and get a sheet up so I may judge it ruthlessly!

[Jedi] Tython

_{In collaboration with Heat and Ruby}

---

The flight back to the temple had felt long to San Anin, as if the very fabric of time itself had slowed its movement just to torture her already tired mind. The look that Kyla had given her after she attempted to kill the Dark Sider… The dark sider, she was the one that plagued her mind and caused the wretched thoughts and memories to come barreling back into the forefront of her brain. For a temporary moment, anger began to grow once more as she thought of the Jedi Knight that had been killed because of her arrival to Tython, but the singular reminder of her master’s glare after she gave into her emotions before stayed with her.

For Kyla the flight back to the temple had been utterly silent. She did not speak a single word to her padawan the entire, short trip. Partly because the battlemaster was gathering her thoughts and try to decide what to say to San Anin when they did make it back. The brief anger she had felt at her apprentice for her two outbursts had quickly been dispeled. The girl was young, emotional outbursts weren’t unheard of among padawans. Still, she had to ensure San would not rely on such moments to guide her in battle, or her ways with the Force.

San Anin knew what would be coming, knowing that she had done a very harsh and tragic wrong to given into her emotions the way she did. That was why she hung her head in silence for a majority of the flight, only the sound of her shifting in the seat that had suddenly become too uncomfortable and the hum of the fighters engines accompanied the two as they made their way to the temple. The padawan wanted to speak to her master, wanting to apologize and let loose of what she had experienced, but she felt that she would only anger her master further if she said the wrong thing. The fear of loosing her emotions would also plague her, holding her back as she wanted to just cry over every piece of stress that she accumulated.

It wasn’t until they had landed that San Anin had spoken, “M-master…” she began already feeling tears swelling up in her eyes, “I- I unders-stand i-if you a-are angry w-with me.” She would have spoken more, but the padawan felt that if she continued then she wouldn’t have the strength to hold back her sadness.

“San, angry isn’t the word. I’m not angry at you for what occurred,I’m disappointed. Disappointed in myself as it would appear my training in order to prevent such moments has been lacking. But also to you for giving in to your rage to launch an uncalled for attack on an unarmed, surrendering opponent” The Jedi master stated firmly as she clicked off the engines of her starfighter.

“There is nothing wrong with feeling emotions. Everyone feels happiness, sadness and anger. It is only natural. To feel them is to be alive. The crux of the issue is seizing upon them and unleashing that anger and aggression towards others while intertwining with the Force. Particularly attacking someone that had already surrendered and presented no threat,” Kyla further added as she pressed a button to open the cockpit. Then she climbed out of her vessel.

Disappointed.

It was that word that registered the most within the padawan’s mind, causing her to blink behind her eyewear and bringing that sadness she had been holding back to the absolute forefront of her thoughts. San Anin has never wanted to make anyone, let alone her master, to become disappointed in her. She slumped back in her seat, dispute the cockpit of the vessel opening up. Her head hung as she tried her best to rid herself of her own personal demons that told her that she was a failure of a Jedi.

She had no words to say or even think of, other than to register her failures in a growing list that all proved her worthlessness. After a moment, she relinquished herself to helm the thoughts and solemnly climbed out of the fighter to follow her master, but finding herself to only stare at the floor and follow a bit further from her master than she normally did. San Anin pulled her arms together, almost as if she were trying to hold herself together from physically falling apart.

Kyla noticed her padawan’s reaction and body expressions as they walked out of the hangar. Jedi and temple personal bustled around them, going about their own business as the master and apprentice trio moved to their destination. The veteran Jedi paused in her stride and wrapped an arm around San, then another as she embraced her distraught young padawan. She firmly hugged San, gently patting her on the back with one hand. Part of her sympathized with the girl, it was difficult as a young Jedi to fully separate the Force and raging emotions.

It was such an easy thing to give in to, precisely why so many Jedi fell that way. One outburst cascading into more to where they had left the light side behind. That was the last thing she wanted from San. Kyla had lost one padawan in her own stupidity and cockiness, she did not need to have another lost because of her failed teachings. The Jedi way was not perfect, admittedly, but it was one of responsibility. San was no Sith, she was learning best she could. It was best that Kyla addressed these types of incidents and ended them as quickly as possible.

“You will be alright San. You’ve made me proud far more than you have made me disappointed. It is a lot to take in and process, but I know you can do it. It is one of the many challenges a Jedi must conquer to be their greatest.” She said calmly whilst holding the young girl. Others walked by them and Kyla ignored them, they did not matter right now. The bond between a master and their padawan was one of critical importance in the Order.

“B-but what if I-I only c-continue to disappoint you?” San Anin asked, her self doubt continuing to grow as her mind focused on the negative.

“You won’t. I don’t want you to dwell on the past, San. We all make mistakes, even Jedi. Today was a terrible day, we’ve all been hit hard by its events. You have to learn from this, grow and strengthen from it. I will help you and guide you to the best of my abilities. I promise I will not let you down. You will not let me down more, failures are not something to be hung up on and cloud your future. Use what happened today as motivation that you can and will be your best.” Kyla stated, pulling away from the hug but still keeping a hand on San as she looked her padawan in the eyes. Making damn sure that her message would get through.

As the two stared at each other, San Anin looked to the floor before speaking once more, “When I saw Elav die, all I could see was Master Miljaco. When I saw the dark sider, all I could see was the sith assassin who killed him.”

She looked back up to Kyla before continuing, “I-I don’t want to lose you t-too, not when I-I can s-stop it.” The padawan finally relayed the reason as to why she acted the way she did, trying to justify what she had done and rationalize everything that had happened behind her memories.

“You can’t allow the past to control you, San. I’m sorry for what happened to your former master, but he would not have wanted you to seek revenge. Elav fought bravely, we would have died if it wasn’t for him. He made the greatest sacrifice a Jedi could. Rage is not something he or Master Miljaco would want from you. How can I take you into battle against the Sith or whoever else if you are harboring vengeance? You are stronger than that even if you yourself do not believe it, you have to make yourself believe so.” Kyla replied firmly, blinking as San explained the trauma she clung to.

“Y-yes, Master,” San Anin hesitantly said, nodding in a confirmation of understanding of her master’s words.

“Good. Trust me San, trust in yourself. Believe in yourself. You have immense potential and a great head on your shoulders.” Kyla said with a smile as she patted San on the back again. She would have to bring up the incident with Grandmaster Shan though, Satele would only aid in helping San.

There was a moment of silence, as San Anin’s hands played with each other, fingers interlocking and disconnecting. “M-master. I-I…” she thought to herself for a brief moment, “Before w-we fought those things, I-I could f-feel other e-emotions. M-multiple at once.” Her voice was quiet, almost as if she were trying to be sure that no one else could hear.

“I d-don’t think they w-were m-my own,” she finished, more hesitant than when mentioning her past.

“And what did you feel, San Anin?”

The duo of Master and Padawan looked up to find the Grand Master standing there, less than a few feet away, having trailed away from the small party she had arrived with and focused her attention here. On these two.

Satele’s features were a master class in control: there wasn’t the slightest hint of her state of mind outside the sing-song tone of her voice, a warm tone that bordered on maternal. Her blue eyes bounced between the two of them, and without slipping into thoughts, Satele had a pretty good idea of what happened.

Ah. “The three of us will speak on this later. Until then, San Anin, see that you do not leave the Temple.”

Those blue eyes lingered on Kyla, and this time Satele did slip into thoughts: We can, and should, do this later without eyes. We have something to tend to at the moment.

Satele had meant the Dark Sider, a fact made obvious by the inherent communication of telepathy, and made more obvious as Satele turned to face the Dark Sider. Restrained at the wrists, and smirking at the three of them.

But staring at San Anin.

“Careful with that one, o’ wise Grand Master: slippery with a lightsaber and quick to violence is she,” every word was a mockery that it was clear none enjoyed more than the Dark Sider herself. But Satele was no longer looking at the Dark Sider. She was staring as Jaslyn. A half dozen Jedi Guardians strolled into the hangar with removed their hoods. Finally Satele broke off to nod to the Guardians, even as she stepped up to the one that seemed so amused. “And what is your name?”

The Dark Sider smirked. “My name is Selene, Satele Shan. I would say it’s an honor...but let’s be honest: Revan was always more interesting than Bastila, and you reek of Bastila.”

Satele gave the order, “Watch ‘Selene’ until one of the Masters from the Council comes to relieve you. Take her to the lower chamber.” It wasn’t until they marched out with the this ‘Selene’ that Satele’s eyes once again moved. “Brye, escort Jaslyn to my chambers. I would very much like to have a chat with her. Kyla, come have a chat with my little ground and tell us what happened.”

Satele had to fight off further frustration. It was time to know what happened, and time to formulate something that at least resembled a plan.

D&D 5E: Dungeon of the Mad Mage

Aurix

---

As the group gathered by the wench, gear ready and morale high for the adventure ahead, there was a clear lack of a certain presence. Aurix was with the group, however, she would soon appear as the doors of the tavern came open and there stood the lizardfolk, next to her standing the brown-coated horse of Achthend. The two stood there for a moment before the lizardfolk took a step forward, guiding the draft horse through the interior of the building. In a moment of silence, the crowd stared at the horse before there was a murmur of happiness swept through the onlookers, very much pleased to see the new take on trying to get through the maze.

Some reached out to let the horse, whose tail merely flicked back and forth as Aurix pulled it along towards the winch down to the maze. Aurix cared not for what the softskins did to her horse, so long as it did not impair her ability to lead it through the maze with the extra supplies that it was carrying on it. As she reached the step to the winch, Achthend stopped and refused the lizardfolk’s motions to try and get it aboard the way down. She knew exactly what it wanted and she could understand why.

Achthend was far smarter, or at least Aurix believed with his sense of preservation matching that of the lizardfolk, than any horse she had previously come across. This horse once killed a drow by crushing its skull when Aurix has led it into the underdark during the first campaign the group had together, proving its usefulness as being more than mere food. She had grown as attached as a lizardfolk could get to a creature, refusing to relieve the horse of service until it has breathed its last breath and provided Aurix with sustenance after death and his bones had been made into a dagger and shield. Such was the circle of resourcefulness that Achthend offered, being more than just a traveling snack for the ever neutral reptilian.

“Smart,” Aurix commented as she reached into one of the packs to grab a carrot, holding it in front of the horse’s face. He leaned forward to try and grab the carrot only for Aurix to pull back, forcing the horse to move onto the winch to retrieve its bribe.

When the horse settled upon the winch, the crowd erupted into cheers as it seemed Achthend had become a hit without caring to and without showmanship. Aurix blankly looked over to Durnan, a low grumble sounded from her as she sized up the rather large man before looking back to the horse, gently caressing his snout. She would not bother putting on a show for softskins, there was no reason to as she was not in danger or threatened by any of the creatures in the raven. “Useless,” she muttered under her breath, as she stared into her horse’s eyes.

D&D 5E: Dungeon of the Mad Mage

I’ll have a post up later today xd

D&D 5E: Dungeon of the Mad Mage

@Mae

I don’t know if I can respect you after that triple post. I just-

Who are you?

The Hanged Man [A Darkest Dungeon Inspired RP]

@Blitzy@Famotill@Enzayne@Rtron@Rhiven Knight

IC post up!

Also have a discord!

The Hanged Man [A Darkest Dungeon Inspired RP]

As the group began its introductions, awaiting for the lord that had summoned them without so much as an explanation, the feeling of dread that came upon them all began to intensify. The fog that had been blocked away from sight, had come back as the crimson curtains slowly began to withdraw to reveal the eerie nature of the darkened outside. The rings that held up those curtains scraped alongside the bar, letting out a small, yet noticeable, noise. The two servants in the room were nowhere close to the window, and they looked at each other in confusion before one stepped forward to inspect the window. He stepped with caution, only looking to the group before continuing towards the damned window.

As he neared, his eyes widened as he saw something that brought fright and fear into a mortal man, as if he saw the embodiment of evil itself. His lip quivered as he took one frightful step back before collapsing to his knees and letting out a wail worse than even a dying man could muster gripping the sides of his head. The other servant, an orc with short hair and tusks filed down, turned to try and retreat from the room grasping the door handle of the great wooden walls that refused to open despite even the power of an orc. The orcish servant pulled with all the might such a beast could muster without even so much of a budge before he too collapsed and began screaming.

The screams echoed through the room, amplifying the screams further as the two servants cried their anguish and fear. The candles that once lit the room blew out one by one until they reached the doorway opposite of either of the servants. Amidst the screams, a door creeped open slowly and deliberately as a decrepit, skeletal hand appeared to grip the side of the door and push it ever so gently. Thus appeared a being beyond what any of the group had encountered, a floating specter shrouded in darkness and madness. In its left hand it held aloft a noose, dragged along the floor. The hooded figure did not move, making no sound.

A hand crept to the blackened head, and held up a singular finger before both the servants stopped their screams in a sudden fashion. Then their eyes rolled back and they slumped to the floor bringing a damned silence to the room beyond what a normal man could bare. Was this the Hanged Man? Was this the cursed being they had tasked to kill?

A being of complete darkness beyond whose power overflowed into the minds of these mortals, bringing a sense of primal fear. A true fear.

The symbols of the maker clattered to the floor, an unknown force breaking them to splinters or melting them down. Only then did the being enter the room to look down upon the group, who had not yet suffered the same fate as the servants had only moments ago.

“Ye will all die,” a withered voice spoke directly into their minds, leaning down to first look to the paladin.

“A being of righteous violence, soon to lose faith and be damned”

Then to the elf.

“A mother of the dead, defying my wishes and bearing the scars of those I have yet to claim.”

The dwarf.

“A man of the abandoned, attempting to be friends to all only to be friend to the dead.”

The white-haired one.

“A hunter whose emotions blind him, death following for each he kills.”

Then finally, the taran.

“A heretic, far from home and in a land of damnation.”

The cloaked figure straighten its posture before spreading its arms, holding the noose forward where each of the group would see their own form swaying there gently. It held the noose high for all to see, darkness coming from it before the rope dropped onto the table they were seated at. The table disintegrated as it decayed into mere sawdust, the nooses then rest gently on the tiled floor of the dining room.

“A perilous journey ye shall take.
Faith and heresy be one in the same.
Look forth, past the lake.
See who takes aim,
Upon the rolling hills,
That which kills.”

It recited its word before once more looking on the group.

“I fear, ye not be chosen for this quest. Though, ye try and fail. All that will be found, is ye’s own mortality.”